Planet of the Icks

Planet of the Icks is the 11th Episode of the 2nd Season of the SpongeBob and Friends Adventures Chronicles series. Icky and Lord Shen, alone in space, fight over the controls of the van and crash on an unidentified planet called Ichthyos. They discover that the planet is inhabited by Ichthyornis birds left untouched by evolution itself. Ichthyos and it's races are under the tyrannical dictatorship of Emperor Jerky, who self proclaims himself as the undisputed ruler of the United Universes and everyone and everything in it. Now, with the help of Jerky's attractive sister, Pretty, Shen and Icky must work together and look over petty disagreements to defeat Emperor Jerky and end his tyranny. This is a parody of the classic movie Planet of the Apes.

Chapter 1: Space Drive
In Space
 * Lord Shen: (Icky drives the van through space) So, where are we headed?
 * Icky: We're gonna take a quick trip to Equestria and visit Twilight and her friends so we can help them with the upcoming Gala.
 * Lord Shen: And why are we doing it alone?
 * Icky: Because the Lodgers have some busy work to be doing for the moment.
 * Lord Shen: Like what?
 * Icky: Well, they had to visit their homeworlds for a few days for reasons I'd rather not explain. Don't you remember hearing it from last week?
 * Lord Shen: Oh, yeah, I sort of forgot.
 * Icky: I can't wait to see the new bearers of the Original Elements of Harmony. But I should also tell you that Celestia is having some issues about what happened on the 4th of July. She is still upset about how you scolded her.
 * Lord Shen: Really? Well, I technically didn't mean to snap at her.
 * Icky: But you were right. She is taking her mistakes VERY seriously. Especially after her lies in that whole pirate fiasco. But still, she told me she would never keep secrets from you again. Even if it means you will get pissed or for your own protection.
 * Lord Shen: I hope so. While I may be losing faith in her, I still love her. And I can't say I blame her for it. I gotta learn to control my temper every once in a while.
 * Icky: Well, anyway, we're on our way to Equestria right now.
 * Lord Shen: Okay...wait a second...I forgot something. I need to go to Gongmen City.
 * Icky: Why? We only left like 20 minutes ago.
 * Lord Shen: Because the Soothsayer said that I need to go and help Gongmen clean up the mess caused by those Skeeterazoids last season. I do that every Sunday.
 * Icky: Well, can we do that after our trip to Equestria? I'm sure Celestia will need some comforting from you.
 * Lord Shen: Sorry, but repairing Gongmen is my responsibility since Lord Cobra used me as his puppet, and it is more important. It's my home, and I intend to protect it. Now gimme the wheel--
 * Icky: NO!
 * Lord Shen: And why not? You have a girlfriend you intend to see as well?
 * Icky: You mean Gilda? I do NOT want to see her. (Lord Shen grins at him)...Alright, fine, yes I do!
 * Lord Shen: Well, I am the General, and I say we're going to Gongmen! (Grabs the wheel)
 * Icky: LET GO!!!
 * Lord Shen: YOU LET GO!!! (The van spins out of control) I SAID LET GO, PREHISTORIC ONE!!!
 * Icky: YOU LET GO, PEACOCK!!!
 * Lord Shen: I don't wanna get into this fight, prehistoric one! Give me the wheel this instant!!!
 * Icky: You can't tell me what to do out here, Shenny! We're going to Equestria, and that's final!
 * Lord Shen: LET GO!!! (The van spins down onto a green and green-blue planet) Wait, what;s happening?
 * Icky: Now look what you did!!! We're gonna CRASH!!!
 * Lord Shen: It's YOUR fault, you dumb clown!
 * Icky: CLOWN?!? WHO ARE YOU CALLING A CLOWN, WHITEY?!?
 * Lord Shen: WHITEY?!? WHY I NEVER?!? (Both Lord Shen and Icky brawl)
 * Computer Voice: Warning! Ship is caught in gravitational field! Brace yourselves!
 * Icky: Oh, how nice! Fighting in the middle of our falling death!!!
 * Lord Shen: Shut up and help me swivel this ship around so we don't burn up!
 * Icky: Sure. (They do that, and they safely crash in a prehistoric swamp)

Chapter 2: Planet Ichthyos
Swamp Later... 2 hours later...
 * Lord Shen: Uhhgh! Where are we?
 * Icky: Well, let's read the UUHD. (Reads) It says we're on a planet called Ichthyos.
 * Lord Shen: Anything we need to know?
 * Icky: Well, it says...(Suddenly the UUHD breaks down) Aw, damn it!!! It's busted.
 * Lord Shen: Well, at least we know the planet we're on.
 * Icky: Ichthyos. Why do I get the feeling that name reminds me of myself?
 * Lord Shen: Well, this place looks like your homeworld, so I guess that question is answered.
 * Icky: Well, I'm still pissed at you for causing us to get stranded on this planet.
 * Lord Shen: Well, excuse me, Mr. Icky-face! I wanted to get my job in Gongmen City done because it's my responsibilty.
 * Icky: Well, I thought you would be happy to see Princess Celestia again. I mean, she is crying her eyes out after what you said to her last 4th of July!
 * Lord Shen: I told you I didn't mean to yell at her!!!
 * Icky: Nevertheless, we're stranded on this Ichthyos planet, and no one knows where we are. I sure hope this place isn't as horrible as Pastoon.
 * Lord Shen: Well, our cell signals are jammed due to the bad weather. Not to mention there's a storm coming this way. (Notes the storm clouds coming their way, and lighting booms)
 * Icky: Crapski! Well, I hope we can find shelter on this mudball soon. I hate getting my feathers wet.
 * Lord Shen: What about our van? We'll need it to get out of here when we get the chance.
 * Icky: You're right, but we aren't strong enough to move it.
 * Lord Shen: Good point, but I have an idea...
 * Icky: (They have made an artificially-created cart large enough to move the van) Good plan. Why didn't I think of that sooner?
 * Lord Shen: So now what?
 * Icky: Well, I don't know. There won't be shelter for a few more miles.
 * Lord Shen: (Shrugs) Why did I even have to get stuck with an idiot like you.
 * Icky: IDIOT?!? I'll have you know that I'm NOT an idiot. I have a brain! Here's a picture of it! (Shows him the picture)
 * Lord Shen: Whatever. Let's just go. (They push the cart through the swamp)
 * Icky: (Sweating and panting) Oh, God! I'm so hungry!
 * Lord Shen: As am I. Hey, didn't we pack some food in the van when we left?
 * Icky: Yeah, great idea. Let's go find it. (Both go into the van) HEY!!! WHAT THE HELL!!! (Little unsentient animals take off with the food) GET BACK HERE! DAMN YOU, THAT'S OUR FOOD!!!
 * Lord Shen: OHHHHHHHHHHHHH, how WONDERFUL! It's one thing we crash on a planet that we don't even know about, but now WE'VE LOST OUR FOOD!!!
 * Icky: Hey, don't blame me! It's your fault we're stranded on this planet in the first place!
 * Lord Shen: You know what, I don't even wanna get into this argument.
 * Icky: Well, at least there's some fish we can catch. (They see a river full of fish)
 * Lord Shen: Me? Eat rotten smelly fish from a swamp? I don't think so!
 * Icky: Fine, enjoy starvation!
 * Lord Shen: (Shrugs) Fine!
 * Icky goes and tried to snag a fish.
 * Lord Shen: "Just my life. First That Peng episode gets canned because the producer get's a very bad temper-trantrum about The T one's failure to attend, the cronitcles in cluttered alot of epiosdes supposed to be uncanon, and Now i am stranded on a planet that i processsed little knowledge of And to too it up, Celestia is in a sadness, and i am dreadfully late to add my contribution to repairing Gongmin."
 * Icky from afar: "Don't worry, i called ahead to both of them on my Iphone, told them we're late cause of van trouble and stranded in a strange alien planet. Your good."
 * Lord Shen: "Oh thank you prehistoric o-"
 * Lord Shen face changed to shocked surprised!
 * Lord Shen: "WHAT?! YOU MEAN TO TELL ME WE HAD A MEANS TO ESCAPE ALL ALONG?"
 * Icky: "We can't fly an Iphone in space."
 * Lord Shen: I MEANT LIKE CALLING FOR HELP?! YOU SHOULD'VE DONE IT EARLIER BEFORE?!
 * Icky: I needed a strong signal, so I found it on a hill. You don't have to be a pea-COCK about it!!!
 * Lord Shen: NOBODY CALLS ME THAT!!! (Both he and Icky brawl again)
 * The duo tumbled into a cave.
 * Lord Shen: "I'LL FREAKING RIP YOU APART?!"
 * Shadows loom over them.
 * It's several universeal sentient animals in loincloths.
 * Shen and Icky look at them.
 * Icky: "Uh.... Hey there."
 * A lioncloth monkey approuched them, and made monkey sounds. as do the "supposively" other sentient lioncloth animals.
 * A loincloth Peacock appeared and grabed Shen's robe, biting it!
 * Lord Shen: HOW DARE YOU?!? THAT IS THE FINEST SILK IN THE PROVINCE!!!
 * Icky: What're you doing to him?!? (The peacock was surprised when he saw Icky, and then got angry) What? (The peacock screeched at him, and attacked him) WHOA, WHOA, WHOA! WHAT THE HELL?!?
 * Lord Shen: What is wrong with you guys?!? (They all look at him)...You don't speak? Well, crap!
 * Icky: SHEN!!! SHEN!!! DO SOMETHING!!!
 * Lord Shen: (Throws blades at the creatures, and the creatures jumped as the baldes missed them as a warning.) The next batch will not miss! (The rest of the tribe retreat) AND DON'T COME BACK!!!
 * Icky: Thanks for that.
 * Lord Shen: Don't mention it. Now, what should we do until the Lodgers rescue us?
 * Icky: I don't know about you, but I think I'll take a little snooze. Night.
 * Lord Shen:...Well, I'm a little bushed, too.
 * Icky: "What was with those people?"
 * Lord Shen: "Judging by their clothing, i am going to assume they're tribal beings. They seems to be barely sentient but animal like in the same time, like, they're in their tribal stage."
 * Icky: "You mean, they're like Tarzan?"
 * Lord Shen: Well...yeah, but they can't speak English for some reason.
 * Icky: And I'm a little confused why that primitive peacock was surprised to see me. Did I do something wrong to him long ago?
 * Lord Shen: (Laughs) That's very unlikely, prehistoric one.
 * Icky: Yeah, I knew that.
 * Lord Shen: But I'm guessing this planet may be populated by birds just like you.
 * Icky: What do you mean?
 * Lord Shen: I don't know, but I think I'm completing a puzzle here.
 * Icky: Hmm...well, I think I know what the puzzle's picture is. You ever watch the 1968-1973 Planet of the Apes movies?
 * Lord Shen: (Dubbed as Brian) Uh, sure, but I'm wondering if you have.
 * Icky: (Dubbed as Stewie) Oh my, God, so transparent. The movies depict a time-traveling story about humans traveling to a future post-apocalyptic Earth ruled by simians, whereas the humans are vermin that are mute and are hunted for sport. This leads to Earth's destruction from a nuclear bomb, and a few surviving apes go back in time, and try to adapt to human society, and their offspring wind up leading a simian revolt to wipe out humans until they were forced to live side-by-side.
 * Lord Shen: Wow, complicated story. But what does traveling through time have to do with this planet?
 * Icky: It doesn't. I'm saying that you might be right. Maybe this planet IS just like future Earth. Instead, it's populated by Ichthyornises like me. Whereas other species like the ones we encountered are vermin that cannot speak and are hunted for sport.
 * Lord Shen: "Well i'm pretty sure the van is incapable of time travel, Prehistoric one."
 * Icky: "True, but, remember that in every universe, it has each of it's own very different versons of earth. Alot of worlds are in very different time periods that are either already passed or have yet to come."
 * Lord Shen: "Interesting throey, but we'll talk about it more by morn. We have alot of traveling to do. So, good night, Prehistoric one."
 * Icky: "Same to you, whitey." (They both go to sleep)

Chapter 3: Captured by...Ickys?
The next morning
 * Icky: (Wakes up after hearing a noise, yawns, and stretches) Lord Shen? Lord Shen, wake up! I heard a noise.
 * Lord Shen: (Sturred) Uhhgh...it's probably a bird, Icky, I'm too tired to get up right now. (Turns around and lies down)
 * Icky: Yeah, it was a bird. And DOES THAT BIRD LOOK OR SOUND FAMILIAR TO YOU?!?
 * Lord Shen: (Shrugs) Fine! I'm getting up! (Stretches)
 * ???: HELLO IN THERE?!? COME OUT SLOWLY!!! WE'RE ARMED, AND WE'RE NOT AFRAID TO GO IN THERE AND USE FORCE AGAINST YOU!!!
 * Lord Shen: "Oh what is possabily the worse you can-"
 * A siluetted figure riding a Raptor appears in front of Shen!
 * Lord Shen: "EGAD! WE'RE IN AN APPEARENT DINOSAUR PLANET?!"
 * Icky: "Not just anyway dino planet.... Get a load of the handsome dude riding the sharpteeth." (An Ichthyornis similar to Icky appears from the raptor)
 * Lord Shen: (Gasps) Oh, great! As if ONE Icky wasn't bad enough!!!
 * Ichthyornis: What are you talking about? (Notices Icky, and gasps) What're you doing to this poor guy?
 * Lord Shen: Poor guy? This 'poor guy' is with me!
 * Ichtnyornis: You don't fool me for one second! You're just making an excuse so I don't arrest you for kidnapping one of us. Besides, after seeing your ship outside, I can tell you're not from here! Foolish alien!
 * Lord Shen: Whoa, whoa, whoa! You think Icky is one of you?
 * Ichthyornis: (Dubbed as Hopper) Are you saying I'm stupid?
 * Lord Shen: What? No!
 * Ichthyornis: (Dubbed as Hopper) Do I look stupid to you? Let's just think about it for a minute! If he was truely one of you, wouldn't he be wearing absolutely nothing fron the waist down?
 * Lord Shen: Well, you look much of a nudist yourself!
 * Ichthyornis: YOU INSOLENT FOOL!!! (Takes out a large triple-barreled gun)
 * Lord Shen: YIPE!!!
 * Ichthyornis: Unhand the innocent bystander, or things will get inconvenient!
 * Lord Shen: Oh, really? You and what army? (Suddenly, many other Ichthyornises riding other raptors appear with triple-barreled guns pointing them at his face)
 * Ichthyornis: THAT army!
 * Icky: Whoa, whoa, whoa! Put your guns down, sir! Lord Shen is telling the truth! I'm not from this place!
 * Ichthyornis: Clearly, this peacock is blackmailing you.
 * Icky: (Scoffs) How stupid can these guys be?
 * Ichthyornis: STUPID?!? I'll have you know, I'm not stupid! I have a brain! Here's a picture of it! (Shows him the picture)
 * Lord Shen: (Laughs) Like looking in a mirror.
 * Icky: "Uh, ignor his comment. I have such the image to prove i'm not a native here. (Brings out a group photo of the louge) Here, looky and weep!"
 * Ichthyornis: "Well i'll be.... The rumors are true. There IS Other Ichthyornis beyond the stars! The imprisoned Dr Wordy was right!"
 * Icky: "Well, here's the thing, and, this may come as a shock, but, Dinosaur worlds like this, are, far few inbetween."
 * Ichthyornis: "They are? What are the other world like?"
 * Icky: "Uh.... Do you really want me to say it?"
 * Ichthornis: "This is a very concerning sudden reveilment! I am the commander of the imperial army, General Armory. I must know this, what is the majority of this univeres?"
 * Icky: "Well, (nerviously laughs) Firstly, There's more then one universe. Trust me on this one, i'll get to it eventally. Secondly, uh, Do you know those loincloth wearing weirdos i, presume you hunt as sport? Yeah, there's "Sentient Versons" of those guys. Don't believe me, the Peacock's proof of that."
 * General Armory (the Ichthyornis): "(Gasp)...... The Emperor is never gonna believe me.... Unless...... YOU! You and the alien Fan-Butt-Bird will serve as evidence!"
 * Lord Shen: "YOU CALL ME A WHAT?!"
 * General Armory: "It's what we call the native birds where the males have those giant tail feathers. We call them Fan-Butt-Birds."
 * Icky: "Oh good lord, you seriously should'nt've called him that."
 * Lord Shen growls!
 * Lord Shen: "INSULT ME, WILL YOU, YOU DAMN, DIRTY ICKS?!"
 * General Armory: "BOYS, SET YOUR GUNS TO STUN?!"
 * Icky: "Oh boy."
 * Lord Shen: YAAAA--(Gets knocked out)
 * Icky: Uh...okay, let's just talk for a moment, General Armory.
 * General Armory: We will not stun you. Tis' against Ichthyos law. 'An Ichthyornis shall not hurt an Ichthyornis'. You have no idea what the penalty is for violation of that rule.
 * Icky: Well, thank you. But, uh, what're you gonna do with Lord Shen?
 * General Armory: Well, if he is indeed one of your allies, we shall try and convince the Emperor to spare him. But it is very unlikely Emperor Jerky will allow that. He is fair, but firm. He doesn't take kindly to other-worldly beings such as this 'Lord Shen' guy.
 * Icky: Well, that's a relief.
 * General Armory: Now, you must tell me, who are you?
 * Icky: My name is Icky. My name was actually spelled I-C-H-Y, but the producer plays by his own rules. I am a proud member of the Shell Lodge Squad.
 * General Armory: The Shell Lodge Squad? Impossible. They're just a myth.
 * Icky:...I can tell I owe you a lot more answers, huh? Se that picture i showed you earlier? Yeah, THAT'S US IN A NUTSHELL?!
 * General Armory: "....... Mind, blown. To be honest, i feel stupid for insulting and/or knocking out a legend."
 * Icky: "Oh don't worry, he's a tough old bird. He once survived getting beaten up by Fagin and Ratigan once. Hell, he survived an explowion!"
 * General Armory: "Well, it's kinda a long walk from here. We might as well enjoy the scenery Mr. Icky."

Chapter 4: Emperor Jerky
Near Palace grounds. The royal thrown room. (He sings this.)
 * Icky: "Wow, classy."
 * General Armory: "Behold, the lair of our great Emperor. His kingdom is wide and huge."
 * Icky: "How huge?"
 * General Armory: "The whole universe. He processes power greater then anything, and anyone."
 * Lord Shen (chained up): "So he self proclaims himself as ruler of the entire universe just because he runs a very sucessful empire? Ego much?"
 * General Armory: "Normally, i be offended by this, but i somewhat do agree. He tends to be, High and Mighty. But that can't be help when you have the powers of a god, in the sacred royal spector of the Anicents. He processes great magic, the ability to create, to heal, to malmitulate, and, if provoked, to destroy."
 * Lord Shen: "I must warn you that kind of power in the hands of someone who tends to have an easily bruse pride is a dangerious combination."
 * General Armory: "(Laughs), you talk like his sister, the imperial princess..... Not that i don't share that concern. His parents did not originaly intended Emperor Jerky to bare such a gift.... but they died of a Mysterious Sickness before Pretty can take the spector offitcally, so His highness took over instead. Aside from a few, slightly over-bearing Regulations, life under Emperor Jerky's rule has been great..... Provided if said regulations had not been volilated."
 * Icky: "I have to be honest here, who would name their kid "Jerky"?"
 * General Armory: "Kinda of a custom here. All of our names must always end with a Y."
 * Icky: "Hmm, seems legit."
 * Icky and Shen are escorted by Armory and the protrol arrived.
 * Icky: "So, were in an empty room."
 * Armory: "Don't be discourage.... His highness likes to, make an enterence."
 * suddenly, the room gets dark, and a spotlight lights on the center of the room.
 * Lord Shen: "What in Celestia's mane?!"
 * Music begans to play, as Emperor Jerky in all his imperial glory begins to get his groove on.
 * Icky: "I don't know why, but he has a mix custome design of my main man Kuzco's Emperor clothing with Jafar's cape, and the trademark planet of the apes helmet
 * Emperor Jerky: "Oh yeah."

hours later. Hallway. Room. In Shen's worst-case senario fear. Present
 * Icky:...Whoa! It's not the only time a character started his introduction to us in song.
 * Emperor Jerky: Welcome to my empire, eavesdroppers! I am Emperor Jerky. What breed of damn fool do you have to be to just land on our planet without a code clearence?
 * Lord Shen: For your information, Emperor, we crash landed by mistake. We had no intention to eavesdrop on your homeworld.
 * Emperor Jerky: So I see.
 * General Armory: We found them in a cave, my lord. They have proof that they're members of the mythical Shell Lodge Squad.
 * Emperor Jerky: The Shell Lodge Squad, huh? Yes, I have heard tall-tales about that team before. They say they ride in a flaming hot comet that can travel at the speed of light, and they are meant to keep our universe flowing safe and still. I'd rather not go into the details. So, tell me, is there more to this story, noble ones?
 * Icky: "Yeah, allow me to do some myth busting Turkey Jerky."
 * Icky:...So you see, that's what we're meant to do. We are meant to keep the UUniverses safe from evil and conquest.
 * Emperor Jerky: Hmm...Interesting. ("I can't believe it! Hundreds of heroes forming only one group. But something boggles my mind...what if these heroes discover my true intentions?...What if they wind up dethroning me?...I must make sure that does not happen. And I know just how to do it. I'll befriend these simpletons to the point they won't be able to believe anything about such things.") How's about, invite you guys to dinner?
 * Icky: "Aw sweet Shen, a free lunch."
 * Lord Shen: Good. Anything's better than the dirty fishes in that river.
 * Emperor Jerky: Good. We shall begin at 12:00.
 * ???: Jerky? Have you seen my lucky bracelet?
 * Emperor Jerky: ("F**K, it's my sister!") Uh...NO, I HAVEN'T SEEN IT!
 * ???: Are you sure?
 * Emperor Jerky: YES, I'M SURE!!! GOD!!!
 * Icky: Who's the lady that's calling you?
 * General Armory: That's his sister, Pretty.
 * Lord Shen: Oh, of course, the princess you told us about. (Pretty comes out as a purple-colored Ichthyornis with long black hair) Whoa, would you look at those hooters!
 * Pretty: WHAT DID YOU F*****G SAY?!? I'LL PEEL THE FLESH RIGHT OFF YOUR BONES!!!
 * Lord Shen: I wasn't refering to you, i was refering to the owls out there.! (They see a few owls out the window) My the glories those owls are huge!
 * Pretty: Oh, sorry....Wait a minute...you're not from here, are you? Jerky, who's the Fan-Bu--
 * General Armory: (Covers her mouth) Don't call him that! Just call him a 'peacock'. That's their original name. He reacts horribly to that name.
 * Pretty: Oh, sorry. Uh...who's the peacock, and that...incredibly charming Ichthyornis?
 * Jerky: Uhh...um...(Gulps)...Uh, sister, haven't you got a bracelet to look for?
 * Pretty: Tell me, Jerky! I don't wanna have to report you hiding secrets again.
 * Jerky:...(Sighs) They're other-worldly beings. Claimed they are members of the Shell Lodge Squad.
 * Pretty: Really? I thought they were a myth.
 * Jerky: Well, I don't need to go into the details. I'm inviting them to a dinner party. And I feel it would be much comfortable if you weren't there.
 * Pretty: "(Scoffs), why do you always disinclude me in every royal party or festivity?!"
 * Jerky: "Well, firstly: One, you always embarris me in front of guests, 2, you question EVERY SINGLE thing i do, and 3rd, you onced interupted a royal hunt when we were this close in baging a vermin."
 * Pretty: Well, it would help if you weren't so damn stern and arrogant all the time. Someday, that attitude is gonna get you in a lot of trouble.
 * Jerky: That's what you ALWAYS say about me, and I'm just as wise and loyal to my own community as my subjects. But YOU are an exception.
 * Pretty: Only because it's true.
 * Jerky: (Shrugs) You are SO infuriating! Sometimes I wish I never even HAD a sister who's just so plum nosey all the time!
 * Pretty: Nosey? NOSEY?!? I'm only doing what's best for this empire. Besides, I wish you could show a little concern over your choices instead of just rushing into things like it's your own business.
 * General Armory: That would be nice. (Jerky bonks him on the head)
 * Jerky: Silence!
 * Lord Shen: ENOUGH OF THIS SIBLING RIVALRY!!!
 * Icky: Yeah, I don't argue with MY sister all the time.
 * Jerky:...My apologies, Mr....uh...
 * Icky: Icky.
 * Jerky: Icky. And you are?
 * Lord Shen: Shen. Lord Shen.
 * Jerky: Yeah, anyway. Pretty, I need to be alone with these two. I don't need you nosing about in it.
 * Pretty: I AM NOT NOSEY!!!
 * Jerky: Nosey, nosey, nosey!
 * Lord Shen: I SAID THAT'S ENOUGH!!!
 * Icky: Yeesh, what's with all this 'nosey' accusations?
 * Pretty: My brother thinks I'm questioning his authority a lot. I'm just doing what's best for this empire.
 * Lord Shen: You said that.
 * Pretty: Look, Jerky! I need to know about these guys before you go nieved again like you did last time. I'm attending that dinner party, and you can't stop me.
 * Jerky: D'oh! ("With this whiney bitch at the dinner party, easeing the duo into my side will be tens times diffitcult then i wanted!...Unless...I can distract her.") Fine! You win! But no nosing about!
 * Pretty: (Shrugs)
 * Jerky: Come, Lodgers! I shall show you to your living quarters.
 * Icky: "Oh sweet, a stay in casa de Ick. Sweetamondo!"
 * Lord Shen: "Well, not my first time i spended time in a royal palace."
 * Pretty looks on concerningly, thinking her brother is up to something.
 * Icky: "So, Turkey Jerky, we been told your parents died from getting sick. Any reveilations on that?"
 * Jerky stopped in his pace, and looked down, like stricten in sadness.
 * Jerky: "I prefer not to reference it. Far too painful."
 * Icky: "Eee, i take it you lost them, at a young age or something?"
 * Jerky: "...... Depends, how young would you consider, 9 years old would be?"
 * Icky: "In Human years, Bird Years or Dog years?"
 * Jerky: Bird years. But since bird years are different depending on the species, I wouldn't worry about it. It all happened when I was the bird equivalent of 9 human years. Leave it at that.
 * Lord Shen: Well, I think it's best if we hear it.
 * Jerky: No thank you. I don't wanna be reminded of that moment.
 * Icky: Okay, maybe we'll ask Pretty.
 * Jerky: NO! Uh...I mean, sure, whatever.
 * Lord Shen:...Okay.
 * Jerky: "Honestly Icky, are you always this questionitive?"
 * Lord Shen: "That's not even one of his WORSE attrebutes."
 * Jerky: "Well gentlemen, here is the royal living qouters."
 * Icky: "Ohh, upgrade."
 * Jerky: "I come back to inform you when dinner is ready."
 * Jerky walks away.
 * Shen and Icky walked in.
 * Icky: "Ya know Shen, maybe this won't be so bad after all."
 * Lord Shen: "Quite, aside from an awkword enterence, i think we're into a fine old time."
 * Knock knock.
 * Pretty's voice: "May i come in?"
 * Icky: Oh, sure, Pretty. (Pretty comes in)
 * Pretty: I'll need to speak with you privately about my brother.
 * Icky: Wow, nice racks!
 * Pretty: WHAT DID YOU SAY?!?
 * Icky: Over there! The racks. (Points at the mideval torture devices)
 * Pretty: Oh.
 * Lord Shen: Do you get that a lot?
 * Pretty: You have no idea. Anyway, I think you should know a few things about my brother before you head over for your meal.
 * Lord Shen: Sure. I could go for some good knowledge once in a while.
 * Pretty: Alright. Emperor Jerky...he's not who he says he is. He's actually got a bad attitude inside. Ever since the death of our parents, he's been pretty...aggressive.
 * Icky: How aggressive?
 * Pretty: Well, he rules the Empire with an iron-wing, and he sometimes treats his subjects harshly. Like this one time, he kicked out a pheasant that was asking for food. He was like "HAH! You really shouldn't have thought of that before you became PHESANTS!!!" Uggh! I've never heard such foul words from even our parents.
 * Lord Shen: What?!? That's just unfair!
 * Icky: I wonder why THAT sounds familiar. Oh that's right, Yzma, a human from Kuzco's empire does the exact same shit.
 * Pretty: Well, he didn't use to be that way. When we were only chicks, our parents were wise and caring rulers of the Ichthyornis Empire. He was always inspired by the great healing powers of the spector.
 * Icky: "And let me guess, they got sick, right?"
 * Lord Shen: "Well, that's sort of a plothole into our story, if the spector has such incredable and healing powers, why did it NOT heal them?"
 * Pretty: "The spector was accsidently entrusted by my brother at the time. He was so scared at the time, he couldn't focus. the Spector couldn't work for him. Mother and Father.... were lost to us.... It destistated him forever."
 * Lord Shen: "I know such a feeling."
 * Pretty: 'My brother became obcessed of making sure no loved one will ever die again. He plotted to make a spell that'll grant all who lived in our world immortally... But, a Monkey servent accsidently ruined it by spilling ink.... destroying all my brother's work..... He was desistated even more. He punished all the non Ichthyornis litterally back to the days of unsentience, they litterally became, primitive simpletons."
 * Icky: "Wow....... So, the hunting them, the names, it's just, his way to further degrade and humiliate them for fucking up his dream?"
 * Pretty: "My brother is still trying to rebuild the lost immortally spell."
 * Lord Shen: "He is?"
 * Pretty: "Yes... he was introduse to the ineditable end at a young age. Any child exposed to death at a young age will have dishastorious results in their later years."
 * Icky: "So.... He's insane, racest, controling, and a jerk, cause, he's afraid of death?"
 * Pretty: "He also wants to make it that no one, not even me dispite our disagrees, would never be lost to him from death. I can't even think that he might not be the only one who suffered a simuler problem."
 * Lord Shen realised that Celestia did suffer something like that. Her parents were once murdered by Taiklar Blackheart, and it effected Celestia greatly. he remembers that Celestia is greatly emotional cause of those scars. he even becomes afraid of, what would happen if it wasn't Luna who became the evil one. he even began to get a dark fanisty from this, awful idea.
 * Celestia (dressed in a more dark queen attire): "MOVE FASTER!! ALL OF YOU, ENTER TORWORDS THE POOL OF NEVER ENDING LIFE, SO I WOULD NEVER LOSE ANOTHER!! I NEVER WANT TO FEEL THE PAIN OF DEATH EVER AGAIN!!"
 * We see ponies, even Twilight (as a unicorn) and the Main 6 forced to be dragged in chains to a scary looking vat of magic liquid.
 * Twilight: "PRINCESS!! PLEASE!! WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!"
 * Celestia: I must not lose you like I lost my parents. You shall become immortals like me. Nothing will be able to harm you. Nothing.
 * Lord Shen:...Yeah...me neither.
 * Pretty: Still, I feel there's something else he's not telling me. Something...dark.
 * Lord Shen: I felt the same thing as well. Perhaps he's trying to hide something from us, and he fears we might interfear with it.
 * Icky: Well, I guess we need to find out what it is, and fast. If it is indeed dark, we need to stop it. Iago never gave up when we were on Pastoon, and neither will I. We will not rest until we find out what's going on.
 * Pretty: Thanks a bunch, Icky. I owe you one. Now I best be going. Good luck. (Leaves)
 * Icky: "Well, so much for things looking up."

Chapter 5: Things Get Icky
Dinner room. palace grounds. Later... Later... Hospital. Dunguin. Large Room
 * Emperor Jerky sat in a regel looking chear as he sits in front a very long table with a series fo food as far as the eye can see.
 * Icky: "Oh man! He eats like a king times 1000!"
 * Jerky: "Slight correction, i'm emperor. We eat more well then even the richest king. Now, dig in. Dinner is lovely today."
 * Icky: "What's for Dins?"
 * Jerky: "Only the finest meals of our nation. freashly made and killed from a hunt."
 * Icky: OH, BOY!!!
 * Lord Shen: GROSS!!!
 * Icky: I'll eat any kind of meat, I don't care WHAT it is. (Lord Shen smacks him) WHAT?!?
 * Lord Shen: Those are former sentients you're about to eat, prehistoric one! I am NOT gonna eat that stuff!
 * Icky: Lord Shen, I'm from a world where it doesn't matter what you eat unless it's of your own kind. So PLEASE don't criticize me. I grow up from a freaked up neighborhood!
 * Lord Shen: (Shrugs) Fine! Have it your way, carnivore.
 * Jerky: Yeesh, I see SOMEONE got a visit from the Devil himself.
 * Icky: Trust me, you don't wanna get him ticked. He's a former evil warlord, and he's one badass bird.
 * Lord Shen: (Gasps) I can't believe you told him that!!!
 * Jerky: That is alright, Fa--(Lord Shen grins angrily at him)...peacock. I respect you even though you are a former member of this 'Villain League' you speak of. Please, take a seat. Our first meal is billed bird al-orange. We snagged him in a middle of a mating ritual with a female variation.
 * Icky: "Dude?! You killed the poor dude trying to get laid?! Ok, i may had been a predator, but i at least have the decenty to NOT eat a guy when he was gonna have the biggest score of his life!"
 * Jerky ripps off a leg from the cooked duck.
 * Jerky: "Suit yourself. Feel free to the Le Lobster al-la cream if you want."
 * Jerky bites down on the duck leg.
 * Lord Shen: "I am curious, where did this, tradition of eating these, "Vermin" came from?"
 * Jerky: "Simple: they muliply like rabbits. All they do is eat, poop, sleep, and have sex. They're almost all over the place. Just killing them and hanging their heads in your private qoutars wasn't doing anymore, and there was also a meat shortage when all the dinos we normally eat traveled too far for our warriors to follow, so, i metathoricly killed two birds with one stone. I also litterally done that yesterday."
 * Lord Shen: "Uh, i'm, concern, you don't happen to eat.... Peacocks, do you?"
 * Jerky: "Oh we tried that once.... Tasted awful. We deside we only hunt Fan Bu- i mean "Peacocks" is to turn their tails into giant feather dusters. Our homes have never been cleaner."
 * Lord Shen: "Our feathers can be used as dusters?"
 * Jerky: "Yeah. And wait until you here what we do to Ostraches here."
 * Some guards walked in the dinner room.
 * Jerky: "OH WHAT IS IT?! I AM HAVING DINNER WITH GUESTS?!"
 * Guard: "Sorry your imperial highess, but we caught another alien colored equine with the weird tatoos on their butts. We believe she's assuseated with the other ones we caught."
 * Icky: "Uh oh.... Why do i have the feeling i have a complete idea what he's talking about?"
 * Jerky: "Bring her in."
 * Some soldiers dragged in a blue pony in archilogest clothing and looks injuried.
 * Jerky: "So, exactly what are you and the others we captured and imprisoned are you little horses anyway? Spies? Thiefs? ASSASSINS?!"
 * The pony: "Please, we're just here for a peaceful exbitdition! My name is Buried Logic, and we came here only to study this undiscovered world. We heard stories of a lost prehistoric world and only wish to study. Honest!"
 * Jerky: "Oh, last time i listen to an exquse like that, a gang of punks lead by a Bushy Tailed rat dunk my head into the royal toilet and escaped before my guards could catch them! I smelled like Poo Water for days?!"
 * Icky: "Aw, no. That sounds like Greasy and his jerks."
 * Lord Shen: "Well, explains why the guard policed me for being defferent."
 * Jerky: "Oh have i have wonderious ideas on how to punish you and your assuiates? Oh, here's one! But i want all of her friends here as once. Oh, and bring in Dr. Wordy while your at it, he's due for his exicution date?! Goody, i get to kill two bird with one stone again, metathroicaly!"
 * Lord Shen: "Oh dear."
 * Icky: "Aw gees, and i was starting to like this dude."
 * Jerky: "Sorry for the short dinner. But something even better popped up! Exicution by yours truely."
 * The blue pony, some other archrelogical ponies involved, and a professor looking Ichthyornis are seen bound by chains.
 * Emperor Jerky appeared, his staff a blazing with an eere red glow.
 * Jerky: "My people! Today, we're gonna witness a double wammy?! The punishment of some alien spies, and the loony Dr. Wordy! Their sentence: Death, by being wiped away, from the face of exsisence?!"
 * The Pony: "NO?! NO! PLEASE NO?!"
 * Lord Shen: "Prehistoric one, we can't let this go on?!"
 * Icky: "I know, but how?"
 * Jerky: "Now, the aliens wasted their final words. But you, Dr. I think you earn at least a final say before i undo your creation of being real. Well, good doctor?"
 * Dr. Wordy said nothing, only gave a stare of disgust to Jerky.
 * Jerky: "..... Hpm, and people say i don't try to be reasonable. Oh well, it's time for the undoing, of your exsisence. Say bye-bye, suckers!"
 * Jerky pointed the spector at the chained souls.
 * Jerky: "But die happy knowing, you were brought down by the Emperor of the whole universe, Emperor Jerky. So adios, mucha-"
 * Pretty: Jerky! (Appears) What're you doing?!?
 * Jerky: I am executing these alien species for intruding on our planet without a code clearence.
 * Pretty: And why are you executing Dr. Wordy?
 * Jerky: I put him up for execution days ago.
 * Pretty: But you know the law! An Ichthyornis is not allowed to kill another Ichthyornis!
 * Jerky: What?!? D'OH, I HATE IT WHEN THE LAW GOES AGAINST ME!!! (Shrugs) Fine! I shall not execute him...I'll just let starvation do it for me.TAKE HIM BACK TO THE DUNGEON! (The Ichthyornis guards do that) Now, if ou would kindly pardon me for a few-"
 * Pretty: "AND ANOTHER THING?!"
 * Jerky: "Aw damn it."
 * Pretty: "Those are harmless reserchers your trying to hurt. They didn't know about a code clearence! they thought they would be entering a primitive planet."
 * Blue Pony: "It's true! We didn't your kind would be sentient, honest!"
 * Jerky: "Sis, these aliens can't be trusted! They could be spies! thiefs! assassins!"
 * Icky: "Buddy, take it from me when i say, those are not the kind of aliens your looking for. I mean, they're Equestian ponies. the most lovey dovy bunch you would ever met. They take good morals like a religen."
 * Jerky: "Not you guys too! Come on, be reasonable dear friends."
 * Lord Shen: "I'm sorry your imperial highness, but here's where we cross the line. Your unethical treatment of your subjects, what you did to those not your spieces, and your distasteful willful prosicution of clearly unthreating visitors, along with what we had been told about you, quite frankly makes you an unworthy of maintaining your undeserve title as Emperor."
 * Jerky: "But..... But.... The spector, and my parents, chose me to be the emperor of my people. Are you questioning the will of my family AND the devine anicents?"
 * Icky: No, we aren't. We're saying that they clearly didn't realize how crude and selfish you are when they chose you as the new Emperor. And I thought Kuzco was a real whiny emperor. Nothing against him like that, but there was moments where he went too far, and this one time, it litterally was almost the end of him.
 * Jerky: "That does not make it sound like your not questioning them at all."
 * Lord Shen: Icky makes a good point. I think I know who rightfully deserves to rule your empire.
 * Jerky: "Are you insinuating that-"
 * Lord Shen: "As a matter of fact, good sir. We are. Pretty was meant to bare that thing. They were gonna reconsider making you emperor until that sickness happened."
 * Jerky: "HOW, DARE YOU SAY JUST LIES?!"
 * Lord Shen: "They are the truth sir!"
 * Icky: "Yeah, General Armory told us before we met ya."
 * General Armory got nervious.
 * General Armory: "Guys, seriously too much detail!"
 * Jerky: "Armory, i can't believe what i just heard?! FROM ALL OF YOU?! LIERS AND BETRAYERS?! I AM TRYING TO SAVE MY PEOPLE FROM THE ENTERNAL ENSLAVEMENT OF DEATH, AND THIS IS THE THANKS I GET?!"
 * Icky: "Don't get us wrong, that's an ambitous goal here, but in all seriousness, your kinda making alot of stupud things here."
 * Jerky: "I'M NOT I'M NOT I'M NOT?!"
 * Icky: "Ok, seriously, let's a mature Emperor here. I mean seriously, turning the former sentient animals into dumb mute beings that're hunted for sport and even eating them? major points lost there. Then there's imprisoning the smartest guy in the world just cause he discovered something, like us. But biggest thing of all, your sister, who you seem to fancy to treat like dirt alot, claims your up to something big."
 * Jerky started to scream as he goes into an extreme temper tantrum!
 * Jerky: "I AM NOT!? THAT TEARS IT?! GUARDS?! GUARDS?!"
 * Guards began to surround Shen, Icky, Pretty, Armory and the chained ponies.
 * Lord Shen: "(Sigh), so much for ending things peacefully."
 * Jerky: I want them all placed in the dungeon! I want them ALL to starve to death! Those Lodgers are NOT to leave this planet alive.
 * Lord Shen: In your dreams, Turkey Jerky! It's only a matter of time before the rest of the Lodge comes to rescue us and stop you from wreaking treachery to this planet.
 * Jerky: No matter. I have a special surprise for them.
 * Icky: "Well, we just have to make sure your as unprepared as possable then!"
 * the guards charged, but Shen acted fast and used his tail feathers to smack alot away!
 * Icky pounces on Jerky and struggle for the spector!
 * Icky: "SHEN! GET THE PONIES, AND PRETTY OUT OF HERE?! I'LL HOLD THIS JERK FOR AS LONG AS I CAN?!"
 * Pretty: (They free the ponies, and flee)
 * Jerky: AFTER THEM, YOU IDIOTS!!! (The guards persue them) Foolish bird! You cannot defeat me! Hell, you cannot even harm me! An Ichthyornis shall not harm another, remember?
 * Armory: Actually, sir, that's not entirely true.
 * Jerky: What do you mean, Armory?
 * Armory: Well, you might have missed this a long time ago. Your parents had altered the law. Now it says that an Ichthyornis cannot harm another Ichthyornis UNLESS NECESSARY.
 * Jerky: WHAT?!? Why wasn't I told?
 * Armory: Because your parents had their suspicions when they left you in charge of the Empire. They knew you would try and hurt innocent lives, so they...ordered us to never inform you in order to make sure there were no casualties.
 * Icky: Hah! In your feathery face, you stupid birdbrain!
 * Jerky: ARMORY! You're fired!
 * Icky: "Tecnecly he's not. Cause me and Shen is done here, you won't even be the boss of rats!"
 * Icky kicks Jerky in the crouch!
 * Jerky: "(TOM SCREAMS!)"
 * Icky stoles the spector from Jerky!
 * Jerky: "(High pitch voice) MY SPECTOR! GUARDS! DON'T LET THEM ESCAPE!?"
 * The guards presue Icky, Shen, Pretty, the ponies and Armory!
 * Armory: "I'll be right back guys, we just need to bust out one more soul!"
 * Pretty: "Please be careful general."
 * Armory flew off in another direction.
 * Icky: "I really wish the penguins were here with us! Heck, i wish any of the louge was here! Then we would've have a quick escape plan!"
 * Pretty: "We'll take my raptor!"
 * Lord Shen: Are you sure it can hold all of us? It's not like riding a horse, it's like riding an ostrich.
 * Pretty: Clearly, you haven't seen my raptor.
 * Buried Logic: I don't seem to get this.
 * Pretty: (Whistles) OH, VALIANT! (A raptor much larger than the ones before appears)
 * Icky: WHAT?!? YOU HAVE A UTAHRAPTOR?!?
 * Pretty: Yeah. Royalty always has the biggest rides. Guards only get to ride Deinonychus.
 * Lord Shen: Wow! Besides, Icky, how did you know about this species? Aren't they from the Early Cretaceous while your world is in it's Late Cretaceous days?
 * Icky: Well, you'd be surprised what you learn when you're on vacation on different dinosaur worlds.
 * Pretty: Yes, those two species survived on our planet thanks to adapting better than reality. Now get on. (They do that) HYAH! (Valiant the Utahraptor shrieked and took off at surprising speed)
 * as they get far, the guards see them.
 * Guard: "Aw shit! They've escape!"
 * Guard 2: "Then we have to persue them?! The Emperor will lose it if we don't return with results!"
 * Guard: But our raptors are too slow to even catch a speeding Royal Raptor, even in numbers.
 * Guard 2: Then we'll have to use our new rides.
 * Guard: What new rides?
 * Guard: Ohhh, THOSE new rides! (They have a large Triceratops)
 * Guard 3: Uh, Swiftly, aren't the Three-Horn-Heads very very VERY difficult to ride?
 * Swiftly: "Oh i'm sure it won't be too hard."
 * Swiftly is seen in full bady cast but beak.
 * Swiftly: "I lay, corrected."
 * Jerky sees this.
 * Jerky: "Poopy. This is gonna be a great snag in my plans. I have to get my spector back. I must speak with Wordy again."
 * Jerky walks in, sees the jail guards unconjustus.
 * Jerky: "What happened here?!"
 * Jerky sees that Dr. Wordy's cell is empty.
 * Jerky: "...... Armory?! Ohh, he is DOUBLE fired!...If that's even possible. Alright, it's time I got out the big guns. Time for my secret weapon.
 * Jerky: (Pushes a button, and a huge door opens up) (Whistles) Oh, CRUNCH?!? (A shaddow and large footstomps are heard, and a large bellowing roar is heard) It's time to get to work.

Chapter 6: The Quest Begins
In the woods. Deep into a dark jungle. Back at the Temple Ichthyos 2 miles later... flashback. Present 12 seconds later...
 * A camp is seen.
 * Icky: "Aw dude. glad we we escape without a scrape. We just wait for Armory to catch up with, what he needed to do, and then, we find a way to escape from this rock."
 * Lord Shen: Well, that's easy, prehistoric one. We just need to make sure Jerky doesn't complicate the Shell Lodge's rescue mission. I'm sure you've already called them, so they're sure to be here any moment now.
 * Icky: Yeah, no joke. Pretty? Any idea how this battle is gonna go down? In other words, what kind of weapons will your people use against us?
 * Pretty: "Here's, the strange irony. Dispite the fact he's a tyrannical dictator, he, actselly hates the idea of war. Also, our empire is the only nation in exsisence due to, well, the obvious fact the former other nations are about as smart as mentally defitent retards."
 * Icky: "So, nothing in the, deadly super weapon department?"
 * Pretty: "As far as i know, the worse you have to worry from my people is our vast imperial army. Fortunately, they could only be imtimidating for so long. the minute things begin to go south, EVEN with weapons and raptors, they'll turn tail and run. It's bad my brother's ignorence is even effecting our armies comidence. But, there is Crunch, but don't worry, he's incredably stupid. In fact, the only true threat to any enemy, and you just stolen it."
 * Icky: "Oh, you mean the fancy magic wand?"
 * Pretty: "Yes. Without it, my brother can't even hope to be a threat to a Compy. All of our people's greatest defences from past threats are from the spector.... (Sigh), ironicly, it was in the hands of one."
 * Icky: "Well, if this thing is so good, why was Turkey Jerky able to use it with absolutely no problem. If anything, shouldn't these "Anicent Devines" deside that Jerky wasn't up for the job by now? I mean, i consider turning sentient beings into mute animalistic morons and eating them and prosicuting innosent ponies pushing it."
 * Pretty: "..... I, i am confused as to why as well."
 * Buried Logic: Yeah. I had no idea this planet was hostile. Nor did I need to have a code clearence to enter. I knew this planet was prehistoric, but I actually thought they didn't have modern-day technology.
 * Pony #2: It's true. We've been studying Ichthyos since last week.
 * Lord Shen: Well, we know we have to get Turkey Jerky dethroned, and make Pretty the new empress. She's more fit to rule the Empire than him.
 * Pretty: Yes. I've had time to learn about running an Empire, so I'll be much better at running it than my brother.
 * Icky: But now that he knows that his parents altered the 'Not hurting another Ichthyornis' rule, that will no longer be an option for us.
 * Pony #3: So what're we gonna do?
 * Lord Shen: We're gonna replace Jerky as Emperor, help the Shell Lodge arrive safely, keep the spector away from Jerky, and...get the mute animals back to normal.
 * Pretty: I know it isn't gonna be easy. The Empire has an army that rides all kinds of dinosaurs. But not just the raptors. They also ride Kite-Lizards, Rock-Skulls, and Long-Legs.
 * Lord Shen: What do these other dinos look like?
 * Icky: I think by 'Kite-Lizards', she means Pterosaurs, and by 'Rock-Skulls', she means Prenocephales, and by 'Long-Legs', she means Struthiomimuses.
 * Lord Shen: How do you even know what she's talking about?
 * Icky: I lived in a dinosaur world, of course. Those are the same names we called the same species in my world.
 * Pretty: Yeah. We use the Rock-Skulls for charging into enemies with their rock-hard skulls, and we use the Long-Legs for high-speed persuit. The only problem about the Rock-Skulls is that they're not that fast, but are fast enough to deliver a huge blow to it's target. As for the Long-Legs...well...they can be hard to spot.
 * Icky: I know how that feels.
 * Lord Shen: "Wait, your kind also uses the Pteradactyl creatures? Isn't that a bit of an Oxy Moron considering your capable of flight already?"
 * Pretty: "That is ironic now that i'm thinking about it."
 * Icky: "I think it has something to do with the fact that cause we icks aren't very big. So on our own, we can't travel around a world as big as this very fast. Not to mention they can deal a greater amount of damage than we Icks can. Those creatures can punch holes through steel like it was plastic.
 * Pretty: That is a good point. Our weapons don't do anything like that. But that's not all. The army has also tried to perfect riding other dinosaurs such as Horn-Faces, Duck-Faces, Spike-Backs, and Scale-Backs, but they're extremely tough to ride and none of them have yet to be properly tamed, so, that's out. But Crunch is a different story. I've seen Jerky ride that beast like a pro.
 * Buried Logic: Uh, who is Crunch exactly?
 * Pretty: He's a Sharp-Tooth we raised in captivity for 5 years.
 * Icky: (Dubbed as Skipper) AH, NO! NOT ANOTHER ONE!!!
 * Pretty: "But again, he's incredably stupid. He gets easily distracted."
 * Lord Shen: "Then we must take advantage of his stupidity and make sure Jerky is helpless to keep him in line."
 * Pretty: "Crunch is only comident with the spector controling him. Without it, i bet my brother's control on him might be.... a bit diffitcult."
 * Icky: Well, it's a good thing we have it!
 * Lord Shen: My thoughts exactly.
 * Icky: Do you think we should destroy the spector?
 * Pretty: Oh, I wouldn't do that. It is an important relic to the Empire, and it's our greatest defense. It also helps protect us from any planetary invasions. Without it, our entire planet would be destroyed.
 * Icky: Oooh...!
 * Lord Shen: Then what do we do with it when we stop Jerky?
 * Pretty: I'll keep it in good wings when I'm Empress. So, when did you say your allies would arrive?
 * Icky: (He checks his Ipod)... In 3 days time. Pleantly of time to render Jerky useless and defenceless.
 * Pretty: "But to be on the safe side, we need to make the anicent devines aware of this and make it he can't use the spector no more."
 * Lord Shen: "Know where they live?"
 * Pretty: "There's stories they lived in the mountains that bleed fire."
 * Buried Logic: "They lived in Volcanos?"
 * Lord Shen: "Well how are we suppose to get their attention?"
 * Pretty: "Our bleeding mountains are different. They are inactive for years, but the firey mountain bleed still exsits."
 * Icky: "Well it's not like we could just walk in and say hi. Going into a volvano without burning alive is impossable. Plus, we got civilians, we can't endanger them on what may be like, a hazordious quest."
 * Pretty: Don't worry. There's a safe passage inside the volcano we can use to get to the hidden tomb. We just need to get through many obstacles to get there.
 * Pony #2: Uh...what obstacles are we talking about here?
 * Pretty: Oh, you know, the hot stuff, the acrid geysers, the melting green pools, the sharp rocks, the noxious gases, the--
 * Pony #3: OKAY, WE GOT THAT!!!
 * Buried Logic: Calm down, Paleo, we've gone through worse scrapes than that. We're adventurers when it comes to studying other worlds.
 * Icky: And...which volcano should the tomb be located.
 * Pretty: The tomb is at the tallest mountain, Mt. Jargotelemon.
 * Lord Shen: (Sighs) Do we have to climb to the top to get inside of it? Because if it is as tall as you say it is, then it will be difficult and dangerous. I know a relative of mine who tried to climb to the top of Mt. Everest, and 1 day later, POOF, he vanished like magic.
 * Pretty: Well, actually, no. We can just enter through a tunnel. Building the entrance on the top of a mountain extremely high would be dangerous because of all the thin air, the blazing cold, and the air pressure. We Ichthyornis may be half-primitive, but we're not stupid.
 * Icky: Well, I never said you were stupid. Do you LOOK stupid? I don't think so. I think you look damn fine pretty. It's part of your name...well, not part of it, but ALL of it.
 * Pretty: Well, thank you, Icky.
 * Pony #2: Wow, look at those lumps!--
 * Pretty: WHAT DID YOU F*****G SAY?!? I'LL BREAK THAT HORN OF YOURS, AND SHOVE IT RIGHT UP YOUR--
 * Pony #2: I wasn't talking about you, toots! I was talking about the lumps on that log over there! (Points at a log with huge lumps)
 * Pretty:...Oh...
 * Pony #2: Yeesh, what's her problem?
 * Lord Shen: I don't wanna get into it.
 * Pretty: Anyway, the journey to that tomb won't take us that long. It might take us only...2 days.
 * Lord Shen: Then that gives us just about enough time to stop Jerky in time for the Lodgers to enter and take care of everything. But first, we must ensure Crunch would remain an advantage for Jerky. I doubt Jerky would have enternal diffitculty on the beast.
 * Icky: "Well, what's the best way to get rid of any Sharp-tooth? A three-horn! We just need to lure one and the other to eachother."
 * A raptor roar was heard!
 * Lord Shen: "CAREFUL! WE HAVE BEEN FOUND?!"
 * Footsteps fast approuch, when General Armory with Dr. Wordy riding with him appeared.
 * Armory: "Sorry i'm late. What did i miss?"
 * Pretty: General Armory, Dr. Wordy.
 * General Armory: Well, I guess you should just call me Armory now since I'm fired.
 * Dr. Wordy: (With an British Accent) Yes, indeed. (Clears throat) Awful person that Jerky is. I simply did not do anything wrong, but he thinks he can just execute me like that? POPPYCOCK! Absolute POPPYCOCK!
 * Lord Shen: Whoa, such British language!
 * Icky: What did Turkey Jerky want you dead for, anyway?
 * Dr. Wordy: "Believing in myths. Which was formerly you 2. But now i assume it would be in addition to the fact i have considered a tractor just because i simply refused to get involved in that, insane project of his."
 * Icky: "Project?"
 * Dr. Wordy: "I fear to say, he wants to use that horrad spector to... cast a spell which he crudely refered to as "The great Ickifycation"."
 * Lord Shen: "Am i to assume he plans to turn all of the united univers into Icks?"
 * Dr. Wordy: "Well, it's another mad project of his aside from his fruitless quest to cause universeal immortally. Though, i have seen evidence this immrotally thing may seem pluseable, but then again, the incantation is bluntly incomplete since my monkey assisence made, a rather fatal error in his part. But thank the anicent devines, without that spector, he can't even do cheap palor tricks. If we are to ensure Jerky cannot ensure the security of his undeserving rule, he must not retain that spector?!"
 * Lord Shen: "We have desided we are to find these "Anicent Devines" and convince them to undo Jerky's ability to actselly use that thing."
 * Dr. Wordy: "What? But, the quest to the devines is hazordious! They live in the fire bleeding mountains, the most dangerious of those montains none the less! No soul has even attempted that trail, and any fool that did, was never heard from again... I don't even want to theroised what may become of those poor fools."
 * Icky: "Then do everyone a favor, and don't. No one's asking you anyway."
 * Lord Shen: "Good doctor, i ensure you this is not the first time we dealt with a deadly challnage. I happen to be a general of the louge, or the curdely refered "Myths" your ungrateful emperor punished you for."
 * Dr. Wordy: "Ah yes. and i want to apologies if our home isn't the most gracious visit you reschived. That Jerky, he's allowed his, grevie misfortune turn him to someone unworthy of the title of Emperor. I mean, what became of the Good Emperor and Empress of old was terrable.... But, it should not be an exquse to, cause these, extremest attempts. I mean, he punished the other races for what MY assisent did. And then this, Code Clearence nonsense cause of some, misfortune from some random appearing punks? This used to be such a nice planet. Why have the Devines allowed us to suffer?"
 * Icky: Don't look at me, I ain't from this world.
 * Lord Shen: Wait a minute, why the hell would they build the Devines Tomb inside a dangerous volcano? Now that's not very smart.
 * Dr. Wordy: Oy! Do not question the ways of the Devines!
 * Lord Shen: Hey, hey, we were just curious!
 * Icky: So how are we gonna get there? It's our only hope of stopping Jerky's reign of terror. Our allies will be arriving in 3 days, and we've got a 2-day journey there.
 * Dr. Wordy: You can't. It was built there for a reason: To protect it from any evil and greedy forces. Those who are pure of heart are no exception. Face it, you guys, it is impossible.
 * Icky: Nothing is impossible! We can do it. We're freakin' Shell Lodgers, and we've dealt with far worse things than what that volcano is capable of.
 * Lord Shen: Pardon my French, but WTF?
 * Dr. Wordy: Trust me, that's what our greatest warriors said before they went on that journey. They never came back ever since.
 * Icky: Puh-LEASE! Our leader SpongeBob said he went knee-deep into an underwater volcano for his best friend, Patrick's birthday, and made it through without a scratch.
 * Dr. Wordy: This is no different than that.
 * Icky: "Look, just because a few unlucky guys didn't made it, doesn't mean it's hopeless! You shouldn't lose faith just because things are painfully blick. Cause that what assholes like Jerky want. for everyone to be as hopeless that they would be trapped in the dark as much as possable. He's powerful, cause the failing to believe the light is what made him like that. It's what allowed him to become powerful, unstoppable, even near-god proporsions. And look where it dragged you. You were locked in just so he can stop the growing bit of hope from raising to something greater. Why? Cause he's more afriad of you, then vise versa. He's afraid of the people. It's the people that have the power to stop guys like that, and it's because of threats of death and that spector that enable him to arose above. He's afraid of hope. Cause if people start to believe in the light, it would bash away any darkness, even someone who was mistaken to be a desten all-powerful emperor. And buddy, we're that match that's gonna light the fuse of hope and faith. We just need the spark from these anicent devines themselfs."
 * Dr. Wordy: "...... If this, "Faith and Belief" is so powerful, then why wasn't Jerky stopped by now? Why was everything allowed to go so wrong? Why the devines neglected us? Many a Ick prayed for Jerky to be stopped.... but it's unanswered. We tried faith. We tried hope. nothing. Nothing."
 * Icky: "I suspect maybe because Jerky did something to make sure he wasn't stopped so easily. I bet that maybe, he did something to the anicent devines that explains why everything went to shit."
 * Dr. Wordy had a realisation.
 * Dr. Wordy: "Your right..... It is our fault. He's powerful cause we allowed him to be. And yes, he may had something to do with the devines, AND those warriors?! I heard a rumor that an imperial encampment has been planned to be in the area inbetween Mt. Jarg and a valley! They was no further word after words, and there has been cover-ups! i even ended believing them up until now?! HOW COULD I BE SO GULLIABLE?! How could we allowed this?! No wonder the anicent devines did nothing! Jerky must had gotten to them first?! But question is, how? The devines created that thing after all, it has to be some spell."
 * Lord Shen: "Perhaps it's maybe a form of god imprisonment spell, possabilily, he imprisoned these anicent ones in their own temples."
 * Dr. Wordy: "If so, that ignorent but admitingly clever basturd?! No wonder this, this, ablorable behavior was allowed to remain unanswered?!"
 * Icky: "Ok, first of all, we need to find this encampment, help out these "Warriors" and pull the plug on it. And then our little temple quest."
 * Dr. Wordy: "I have heard some rumors where the encampment lies, but, none of them clear or even any remote possability of being true. And then eventally was covered up."
 * Armory: "Sadly, i wasn't among the generals trusted with knowlegde of the encampment. I didn't even know about it until being told just now, and from the various rumors until they died down."
 * Buried Logic: "Actselly, i think i once heard some of the soldiers that brought me into this nightmare talked about this, encampment."
 * Pony #2: Yeah, they said they might've found out it's location. It's said to be right at the entrance of the tunnel to the Devines Tomb inside the volcano.
 * Buried Logic: Yes, thank you, Obsidian.
 * Dr. Wordy: Well, I guess we have no other choice but to risk our lives to get to that tomb, talk to the Devines, and stop Jerky! Cause let's face it, we don't have the power or the numbers for a more direct approuch for the time being.
 * Lord Shen: "To our blunt misfortune."
 * Pretty: So let's go. Judging by the tracks made by our raptors, I think the army is hot on our trail, so there's no time for sleep.
 * Icky: Darn it! Okay, fine, let's go. (They all hop on the raptors, and leave)
 * Armory: (Riding his Deinonychus through the jungles) How much farther is Mt. Jarg?
 * Pretty: (Riding her Utahraptor) Not too far, Armory. We have only 5 miles to go. (They get a view of the snowy mountains, and the tallest one catches their eye. This was Mt. Jargotelemon) Well, there it is. Mt. Jargotelemon.
 * Dr. Wordy: Upon my word!
 * Lord Shen: It's enormous!
 * Icky:...(Dubbed as Peter Griffin) Uh, Lord Shen, this may be a bad time to tell you, but I may've left the weed whacker on.
 * Lord Shen: YOU MAY'VE WHAT?!?
 * (The weed whacker is seen tearing up the living room)
 * Lord Shen: (Shrugs, and on a tape recorder) Note to self: Take care of the Prehistoric One when we get back home. (Puts it up)
 * Pretty:...Okay...Let's go. (They ride their raptors to the volcano)
 * Icky: "So.... If there's an encampment, where is it?"
 * Lord Shen: Right over there! I can see it! (The emcampment as well as the entrance is seen 2 miles away)
 * Buried Logic: That's it, alright! Paleo, Obsidian? Are you ready for this?
 * Obsidian: I was born to trek in volcanoes, dude!
 * Paleo: YEAH! BRING THAT F*****G VOLCANO ON!!!
 * Lord Shen:...Again, WTF?
 * Pretty: Let's go! (They pick up the pace)
 * Pretty: (The gang make it) Whoa, there, Valiant! (Stops her Utahraptor) Easy there! (Valiant shrieks)
 * Armory: Whoa, Snapper, we're he--(His Deinonychus stops, and Armory flies off of his back screaming, and crashes. Then he comes up to his raptor) Snapper? If I foreshow, I would NEVER do that again! Any questions? (His raptor shakes 'no') Good.
 * Obsidian: WHOO-EE! It sure feels nice to have a gallop every once in a while. I've really been taking off the weight of those triple-decker grass sandwiches quickly.
 * Paleo:...Okay, we didn't need to know that.
 * Icky: But at least we're here. (Hops off of Valiant the Utahraptor)
 * Lord Shen: HELLO?!? Is anyone here? Hello? We'd like to join this expedition for a means of defeating Emperor Jerky!...Hello?...I guess no one's he--
 * ???: HELLO, STRANGERS! (Everyone is surprised to see an encampment crew of Ichthyornises all in various colors)
 * Icky: Uh, Pretty? Question? Do all the Ickys on your world in...various colors?
 * Pretty: Various colors everyone.
 * Buried Logic: Kind of like the ponies in Equestria.
 * Ichthyornis Expeditioner Leader: (With a military tone) I am Captain Nobility. Welcome to the most TREACHEROUS expdition on Planet Ichthyos! We are walking knee-deep into Mt. Jargotelemon to--(A few expeditioners start giggling)
 * Icky Expeditioner #1: Mt. Jargotelemon! (Laughs)
 * Icky Expeditioner #2: Who came up with THAT name? (Laughs) What're they gonna name the next mountain, Mt. Kakapoopoopeepeeshire? (Both burst out laughing)
 * Cpt. Nobility: BRODY?!? NAVY?!? (They both get back into soldier position) Are you being complete childish maggot-pies again?!?
 * Both: SIR, NO SIR!
 * Cpt. Nobility: That's what I thought! The next time I see ANY of you slacking off again, I will put my foot so far up your asses, your shit will come out of your mouth! (Another expeditioner laughs, and Cpt. Nobility gazes at him) Is there something funny about me, Pvt. Hazy? IS THERE SOMETHING FUNNY ABOUT THE WAY I TALK?!?
 * Pvt. Hazy: SIR, NO SIR!!!
 * Cpt. Nobility: I'll give you something to laugh at! (Kicks him in the gut) HAH! Priceless! If anyone else wants to be childish babies, then I guess it's about time YOU had some pressure in your f***** grapes!!!...No? Then I guess you'd better shut your beaks up before I make change! DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?!?
 * All Expositioners: SIR, YES SIR!!!
 * Cpt. Nobility: Good, that's what I like to hear.
 * Icky: (Dubbed as Sid) Two words: Anger management! (Lord Shen smacks him) OW!
 * Lord Shen: "Listen, we heard you may be preventing determin warriors from making the devines aware of what Jerky is doing."
 * Nobiity: "We used to.... But eventally, we never got any more letters from Jerky demanding results. I guess he stopped caring and just forgot about us. We eventally recruited the warriors into our side. Our operations are uncerimoniously shutdown, but we're stuck here cause Jerky never gave orders to return. We practicly live in this, devine forsakened encampment, surviving on those odd tasting compies! Laak!? This is the most disrespectful way to let perfectly good imperial forces like us in the dust like that."
 * Icky: "Wow, sucks to be you. Listen, uh, we suspect Jerky hired you guys to block the mountains for any possable reason involving the anicent devines... Did he say why?"
 * Nobibity: "(Sigh), alchorse, the first order. I still remembered it those faitful moons and suns ago.
 * A younger Nobitity and other imperial icks stood in a straight line as Jerky stood before them.
 * Jerky: "You are the finest of my imperial army. In your early years, you served the empire well during my late parent's rule. I am entrusting you all for a speical mission.... But first, can i enturst you all to never reveiled it to any you captured?"
 * the soldiers: "SIR YES SIR?!"
 * Jerky: "Good.... You see, your entrusted to make sure no one enters the lair of the anicent devines themselfs. Why? Let's just say, i made it that the anicent devines found themselfs, in a spell-bound retirement sleep, and it's periment as long as my spector is not in the hands of someone with intent to undo my spell, or anyone able to say the reverse incantation. Is that understood?"
 * soliders: "SIR YES SIR?!"
 * Jerky: "Some of you may had, some questions why i did it..... Believe me, doing it was the last thing i wanted in light of.... certain events.... But i had to. Those devines threaten my projects, espeically since my, justifived rage apawn the other "former" sentience on our planet, and i can't risk letting them undo what i am trying to do for all of my universes... Is, that, clear?"
 * Soldiers: "SIR YES SIR?!"
 * Jerky: "Good. You will rechive daily reports and rechived weekly rations resuplies, cause i consider this a worthy investment in my empire. Now, there had been those who, question my rule, and sought to ask the devines why they're letting me do this. You are to keep them hostaged due to a certain rule that forbids death to a fellow ick. Remember your orders, and good luck. SALUTE?!" (They do that)
 * (Nobility): So as you can see, we were ordered to keep rebels from entering this tomb, and stopping whatever Jarky wants. Then that's when the second order came...
 * (Icky): "Second order?"
 * Nobility: (Gets the message and reads it) Let's see what this message beholds. "From Emperor Jerky. I want to thank you for your excellent work in keeping the tomb entrance safe from those who opposed me for over 2 weeks." Hmm..."But I'm sorry to say that you must STAY A LITTLE LONGER?!?" WHAT THE HELL IS THIS OUTRAGE?!? "You are still on duty as captain of the Imperial Military. I will give you orders when I am ready. To Cpt. Nobility"...(Shrugs) Well, boys, we're still on guard duty!
 * All: AWWW!!!
 * (Nobility): We waited for a sign, a signal, a warning, a sound, a voice, an anything. But for almost 10 years, we heard nothing...
 * Nobility: That dumbass Emperor Jerky is working us out of our lives, and we can't do anything about it! I haven't met my wife and have never been home in time to watch our 6 eggs hatch! I can imagine the babies already graduated and got jobs by now! AND I NEVER GOT THERE IN TIME TO SEE THEIR BIRTH!!! God, Tracy must be pissed at me. But what she SHOULD be pissed at is Emperor Jerky for keeping us cooped up in this rotting spot while my immature maggot-pies laugh at my 'OH-SO FUNNY' threats and shouting! And look at me! I'm 39 years old, and I've been cooped up here for 10 years! 10 YEARS!!!
 * Icky: (Dubbed as Private) 10 years?
 * Nobility: (Dubbed as Rockgut) 10 YEARS!!!
 * Lord Shen: So you were only 29 when you got your orders? God, you've got your work cut out for you!
 * Dr. Wordy: Well, Cpt. Nobility, we have a mission to attend to, and we'd be delighted if you could help us.
 * Cpt. Nobility: Ah, Dr. Wordy, I presume? You haven't changed very much.
 * Dr. Wordy: Of course I haven't! I shave every day!
 * Icky: Do birds actually have hair?
 * Cpt. Nobility: Sorry, Dr., but orders are orders! I'm afraid I cannot let you pass.
 * Icky: "Seriously, your still gonna obey the orders of a clearly tyrantical emperor who left you to die and prevented you from seeing your family, and pretty much left you with a bunch of childish idiots?"
 * Nobility: "You sir made an absoluty good point. At this point i shouldn't stay loyal to that twat! What good is obeying some order if it means i don't even know (begins to cry) what my own kids look like (cries out of control) but it's not like he's an ordenary tyrant! no, he has to be the one who processed that damn spector! If only he was no longer in procession of that accursed-"
 * Icky: Uh, we happen to have it. (Shows him the spector)
 * Nobility: (Gasps) The-the-th-th-the SPECTOR?!? HAHAH! In your BEAK, you tyrannical twat! I SPIT IN YOUR DIRECTION!!! You guys do realize Jerky's gonna come after you, right?
 * Dr. Wordy: Well, yes, but they'll catch us now if we don't get inside that volcano and search for that tomb.
 * Lord Shen: Indeed. You have just the heroes to help you put a stop to Jerky's fiendish plot. Me and Icky here.
 * Nobility: Whoa...a sentient Fan-Bu--
 * Pretty: DON'T SAY IT!!!...
 * Nobility:...Well, Ichthyornises are the only sentient creatures left on this planet. How is this even possible?
 * Buried Logic: These are lost members of the Shell Lodge Squad. And we've heard that you consider them a myth.
 * Nobility: The Shell Lodge Squad? You mean that old urban space legend? (Scoffs) You cannot be serious!
 * Obsidian: Trust me, we know these guys! They saved our world from evil multiple times! The peacock is a former warlord who almost tried to take over--
 * Lord Shen: THEY DO NOT NEED TO KNOW ABOUT THAT, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!!!
 * Paleo: And this Ichthyornis here is one of their own comedians.
 * Nobility: Comedian, huh? Well, show me how funny you really are!
 * Icky: Oh, I'm funny, alright!
 * Lord Shen: But not THAT funny, I might add. (Gets banged in the head by Icky with a sledgehammer) OOF!!!
 * Icky: Oh, really?
 * Nobility: (Scoffs, and laughs, along with the other Icky Expeditioners) THAT is so f*****g hilarious!
 * Lord Shen: D'OH, YOU WANG-HEADED FIDDLEBRAIN!!! WHERE'D YOU GET THAT HAMMER, ANYHOW?!?
 * Icky: My pocket. It's collapsible. (The Ickys all laugh)
 * Lord Shen: AARRRRGGGGGHHHHHH!!!! I'LL SHOVE YOUR EAR SO FAR UP YOUR ASS, YOU'LL HEAR THE SOUND OF YOUR SMALL INTESTINE AS IT PRODUCES SHIT!!! (The Ickys laugh harder)
 * Icky: Whoa, whoa, whoa! Let's all try to take a joke here, Shen! I mean, c'mon...
 * Icky: (His sledgehammer is stuck up his throat as he gags) AKKHHHKK!!! AHHKK!! AAHHHCCK!!! (Manages to cartoonishly pull the sledgehammer out of his body, and gasp for air) UGGH!!! WHY YOU LITTLE--
 * Pretty: If you two Tasmanian Devils are finished FIGHTING, we'd like to get on with this mission and stop Jerky, and save our world.
 * Lord Shen:...You're right. (They stop, and both he and Icky nudge each other angrily)
 * Dr. Wordy: "I hope this, appearent disagreement doesn't end up mar our progress."
 * Armory: "Hope so too."
 * Pretty: "Captain, we ask too things of you, keep the pony civilians safe, and to watch out for my brother and the rest of teh armada."
 * Nobility: "It shall be done your grace."
 * Pretty: Great. Let's get going, guys! (They enter the tunnel)