The Tallest Talltales EVAH!

The Tallest Talltale EVAH! is the 18th Episode of the 2nd Season of the SpongeBob and Friends Adventures Chronicles series. Pinkie Pie has invited Spyro, Sparx, Kairi, Sora, Donald, Goofy, Cynder, Riku, Twilight, Spike, Applejack, Rarity, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, The Cutie Mark Crusaders, Spongebob, Patrick, Squidward, Sandy, The Hyenas, Shrek and his friends, the Madagascar Gang, the rest of the lougers, Discord cause he's hiding from the controversy he caused in the Season 4 premere, and the Dragon group to watch Survivor: Dragon Island, but the Baby Cakes just won't go to sleep. So our heroes deside to make up some hilariously crazed bedtime stories to put the baby ponies to sleep. There are 8 stories in total, which are all equally hilarious, heroic, adventurous, and exciting. Equily, 4 are Alternate Realities, and 4 are Obscured Adventures of Lougers and Friends. From Pinkie Pie on the run from the law, to Sandy's Southern Sheriff adventures with Dirty Dan, Pinhead Larry, and Duckbilled Benny, and more.

Stories List

 * Pinkie Pie: Far Far Away's Most Wanted (Alternate Reality)- In Far Far Away, a lonesome pony named Pinkie Pie is wanted for some crimes she didn't commit. An unknown thief known as The Meanie Burgler has stolen the king's precious jewels, the queen's beatiful assesories, and all of the gold from the royal bank and gets Pinkie Pie blamed by disguising himself as her. But Pinkie always defends herself from arrest by Officer Kill-Joy, who is a near clone of Cranky Doodle Donkey, and his brave men in metal, as well as two imfamously dangerious troll bounty hunters, with her psychological condition in which she can make people laugh called Giggler Syndrome. And when she makes friends with the rainbow-colored and nature controlling superheroes of the kingdom named Chrome Dash (Rainbow Dash) and Natureshy (Fluttershy), her life changes forever.
 * Western Hoedown (Alternate Reality)- In the old South in a place called Texas, another hero is present. Sheriff Sandreas Cheeks and her parnter Cowboy Puss in Leather Cowboy Boots are on the look out for 3 mad criminals named Dirty Dan, a filthy squirrl, Duckbilled Benny, an outlaw who's ironicly a vulture, and no duck-based traits at all, and Pinhead Larry, a goof ball scorpian, who are robbing banks and rustling cattle and livestock as quick as a flash. It's up to Puss and Sandra to send these jerk offs to justice.
 * Cynder and The Mad Puppet Doctor (Obscure Adventure)- Spyro, Sparx, Cynder, Riku, Twilight, Spike, Gilda, Trixie, the Mane 5 and the Cursaiders (who they stow-awayed into it) are sent on a mission By Celestia to stop the villainous plans of Shrek Pinocchio's evil cousin, who calls himself The Devious Puppet, who plots to make the united universe his by turning everyone into puppets, has also kiddnapped the other lougers and Kairi thanks to a secret lost talisment of Discord simuler to the string holders that hold up traditional wooden puppets, called the "String Holder of Choas".
 * Gingy's Grib (Obscure Adventure)- Gingy's new Grib, Casa de Gingerbread looks great and the party is tasteful, literally. All the Gingerbread Men are playing with candy while Gingy tries to impress his crush, Gingerette, with his own secret candied cookie recipe. This succeeds until a corrupt Gingerbread Man real estate agent named Sour Cookie, crashes the party and steals Gingerette and Gingy's deed to their home so he can sell their home to a crime lord he's heavily indepted to. Now, Gingy must get it back.
 * Berk's Giant Noisy Neighbors (Obscure Adventure)- The Viking Island Town of Berk gets some new neighbors, the giant, noisy partying kind! Who is one of these giants? Northen Land Stomper The Undefeatable. But when they find out that the giants are jerks who treat dragons like vermin, now the lougers and the dragon gang must beat Land Stomper in his own challnage: the test of battle superiority, who ever wins, makes the loser leave by great force.
 * Spyro's Cooking Show (Alternate Reality)- Spyro is an ispiring under-appresiated grunt of an abusive and secretly cruel host Chef Al-La Creep, a giant brown recluse french chef, to a cooking show where established and OC chefs cook with a special ingredient. Today's specal incredient is: Fluttershy. Can Spyro do something to finally stand up to his abusive master before Fluttershy's lunch?
 * Run Away Greymon (Obscure Adventure)- Parody of The Rugrats' Runaway Reptar, Greymon is reaking havioc in Tokyo Japan along with the Digi Kid's other digimon in their champion forms. Someone named Dr. Wazabi is behind it all and only Sam, Max, The Digidestined, Devon, Cornwall, Brandy, Whiskers, Lola Boa, Ed the Otter, Batty, Miguel and Tulio can stop him before he uses the Digimon to destory Tokyo with their other digivolve forms.
 * Twilight the Wizard (Alternate reality)- In this story, Equestria is a more safer place in a time where there was no need for the Elements of Harmony for it was now protected by Princess Celestia's Students who've mastered powerful magic that fended off many other countless threats to Equestria. (and when Twilight didn't became princess so we can still use Twilight as a Unicorn. Remember, these are talltales, and therefor, don't really exsit.) The most powerfulf and benvoloent of them all was Twilight along with Spike, Taiku and Princess Alice themselves. But soon, they will come face-to-face with the return of an unexpected enemy: Sunset Shimmer, (cause Twilight Alicorn never happened, Sunset is still evil and still soughts to become an Alicorn), Now, Twilight must sacervice her Unicornhood so she can have the power to tame the darkness in Sunset Once and for all. (Note: I still didn't see Equestia Girls, but i do think Sunset is a decent villain, just wish she was used better.)

Fan-made Transcript
Intro (Backstreet Boys- Larger Than Life)



Chapter 1: Sugarcube Slumber Party
Sugarcube Corner Later.
 * Icky: Wow, did that episode rock and suck at the same time.
 * Donkey: How are yall' supposed to protect Equestria now?
 * Twilight: Don't worry, Donkey! We'll just find those missing 6 keys to that weird box and find out.
 * Discord: Glad Lord Shen didn't bother to show up. I bet it's so he can glout to Celestia how he's "supposingly" right about me. I could just hear that bleach Peacock now. (Magically appears in Lord Shen's clothes) I KNEW IT ALL ALONG!!! I WAS RIGHT ABOUT YOU FROM THE START, YOU DISHONEST JERK!!! I OUGHTTA SHOOT YOU DOWN WITH ONE OF MY CANNONS RIGHT NOW!!! (Magically makes one of Shen's cannons appear)
 * Rainbow Dash: Whoa, slow down there, Dissy! You've caused enough trouble for us for once.
 * Puss: Still, if you can believe Discord would set up a silly charade like that just to teach Twilight a lesson about being a princess, I could just say 'No puedo chrerro!'
 * Patrick: Say what?
 * Puss: 'I can't believe it' in Spanish.
 * Patrick: Right, I knew that.
 * Puss: No you didn't.
 * Discord: Still, at least Fluttershy still forgives me after all that.
 * Fluttershy: Well, I am a little disappointed in you after lying to us about those seeds, but I can still forgive you for not truely doing anything wrong.
 * Donkey: (Playing peek-a-boo with Pumpkin Cake with his ears) PEEK-A-BOO! Peek-a-boo!
 * Pumpkin: Donkey, donkey, donkey! (Giggles)
 * Icky: "But in all honesty Discord, you don't ACTSELLY think Shen is gonna see Celestia again just so he can glout like a jackass to her, do you?"
 * Discord: "Wanna bet, Mr. Doubts-a-lot?"
 * Icky: Yeah!
 * Discord: Yeah?
 * Icky: YEAH!
 * Discord: YEAH?!?
 * Twilight: ENOUGH!!! (Discord and Icky stop) Lord Shen is still gonna find out because he is sure to have watched the premiere. Let's hope he doesn't do anything stupid.
 * Hiccup: "Still, it's cool we're invited into this."
 * Pinkie: LET PINKIE PIE'S SLEEPOVER EXTRAVAGANZA BEGIN!!! (Icky hops onto Discord like Scooby-Doo after he is scared by Pinkie's loud voice, and she launches a party cannon with confetti and balloons)
 * Icky: GODDAMN IT, PINKIE, YOU SCARED THE PISS OUT OF ME!!!
 * Discord: This isn't Scooby-Doo, you know, Ickster. (Icky soon realizes, and gets off of him)
 * Shrek: You're lucky your screams didn't scare the Baby Cakes.
 * Kowalski: Yeah, babies can get frightened by yells or screams VERY easily.
 * Pinkie: Sorry, didn't think that through, but (Whispers) let's get this party starteeeeed!
 * Trixie: "Let's just be glad it wasn't the work of Nightmare Moon or some new villain, or it would've been most ironic to surrender those things so easily."
 * Gilda: "Yeah, but Discord may wanna be ALOT careful now. Cause I don't think Pred Jerk Des and the Bitch Sisters are gonna take kindly to Discord's stunt."
 * Cynder: "I'm more worried that, if the villain teams or outside villains found out about this, that Equestia is without defences or even the existence of the tree, it's gonna attract alot of dangerious attention, espeically that of Qui. She would do ANYTHING to make the new villain's act happen, and I doubt she would take her promise to stay away from here to heart."
 * Twilight: Still, we need to figure out what we're gonna do until those keys are found.
 * Pinkie: Guys? Survivor: Dragon Island is about to start!
 * Icky: "Aw sweetmongasaur."
 * Discord: "Honestly, what IS with you and those catchprhases of yours?"
 * TV: "WELCOME TO A SPEICAL EPISODE OF: SURVIVER: DRAGON ISLAND?!"
 * Icky: "Oh boy!"
 * TV: "TONIGHT'S EPISODE: TEAM WINDFIRE AND TEAM VULTURE FEATHER ARE STILL BUTTING HEADS WITH EACHOTHER?!"
 * Suddenly, TV audio is drowned out by sounds of crying!
 * Icky: "Uh, I know those people tend to be drumatic, but, when did they cried litterally like babies?"
 * Discord: "No, no, no, you dim-witted living fossal, tis the sound of REAL babies!"
 * The White Rabbit: Tell me that's not the sound effect box broken again.
 * Mad Hatter: "Nope. It worked well some of the previous episodes."
 * PInkie's voice: "Uh guys? Can you help me with the Babies? They seem, extra fussy this time around."
 * Icky: You guys go help Pinkie while I have this recorded so you won't miss any of the show.
 * The lougers, Dragon Team, and a layed back, not in any rush Discord goes off.
 * Iago stayed behind, wanting to ensure Icky doesn't screw this up somehow.
 * Iago: "I'm staying with you Icky, just to be sure you don't somehow ruin everything."
 * Icky: "Ok, but I think i know how to work a recording system Iaggy."
 * Iago: "Just being here just in case."
 * Icky:... Right.

Chapter 2: A Baby Bedtime Gone Wrong
Baby Cakes' room.
 * The baby ponys were brawling their eyes out with Pinkie trying everything she could to make them stop fuzzing.
 * Shrek: Pinkie, what in the name of Gingy is wrong with them?
 * Pinkie: "The babies don't want to go to bed for some reason!"
 * Sparx: "Well, i guess it's because they had too much fun with us. We have that effect on kids."

Cutaway Present
 * Discord: Yeesh, I haven't heard a baby crying ever since I pranked that pony mother eons ago.
 * Mother Pony: (Runs a stroller carrying her foal until a magical flash appears) What the--?!?
 * Discord: (Magically appears as a baby) I just wanna spwead chaos and be thwilled, is dat a cwiiiiiime?
 * Mother Pony: AARRGGGHH!! WHAT'VE YOU DONE WITH MY BABY?!?
 * Discord: Relax, cuddle-cups, I may be a spirit of chaos, but even I don't wanna bring harm to a little foal. (Magically makes the baby appear) Here, I was keeping him on my throne. (The foal starts crying)
 * Mother Pony: YOU CREEP!!! (Smacks Discord away with her purse)
 * Discord: YAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!...(Crash)
 * Gilda: Seriously, dude?
 * Gingy: I wouldn't handle a baby like that! That's just weird!
 * Discord: Look, I did it back when I was still evil, okay?
 * Shrek: "Appearently, being evil is simular to being stupid... or a pedophile."
 * Discord: "AW COME ON!? I know i messed up royally with the Plunder weeds, but do we have to result to mockery?" (The Baby Cakes continue crying) UUGGHHH!!! Not to be rude or anything, but can someone PLEASE shut them up?!?
 * Kairi: Well, why don't we tell them some stories?...(They all laugh except Spyro) Aw, c'mon! It helped me when I was a child. Grandma always told me bedtime stories to get me to sleep.
 * Banzai: I got a story for you! BOR-RING! (Shenzi smacks him with a mallet)...I needed that.
 * Kairi: Well, I got a good one. It about me as a King Fu master named Kairi Cha-
 * Phil: I have to stop you Kiari. Sorry, but the producer desided to scrap the Kung Fu Kairi story. We're also not doing the "Shroud" thing anymore.
 * Tito: I got one. It's about Titomeo and Georgiette!
 * Skipper: LET'S NOT!!!
 * Scootaloo: Could I tell another one of those Star Wars stories we promised we'd tell?
 * Applejack: We're savin' that for a later episode, Scoo.
 * Spongebob: Yeah.
 * Pinkie: "OH, OH, OH! I got one! And it's a story of epicness, and comedy?!"

Story 1:  Pinkie Pie: Far Far Away's Most Wanted
Alternate reality: Far Far Away in the Shrek world. The Poison Apple Inside the Poison Apple Private room. Outside. Tunnel. Forest Royal Castle. Forest Troll Village outskirts. Flashback Present Mack and Kelly's tower room. Hall Flashback Present Crocadile room. Hallway Flashback Present Hallway Valley. Flashback. Private Room Later Reality (of the story.) Dragon Tyrant Castle. Statue Room. Inside the statue. Giant Throne room. Flashback. Cutaway Present Reality. Statue room. By morning. Later after they got to the Magic Shcool. Hours later. Hospital 4 3/4 minutes later...
 * (Pinkie): "Once apawn a time, In that Far Far Away place, there was an orphan pink pony in the FFA orphanage, which was, kinda broken, and poor, and, under budget. But the Maid lady was REALLY nice! She treated alot of orphans very well, even the pink pony. The Pink Pony had a Griffin friend, who was abit troubled. He dreamed of being a famous thief, which ended up made an impression on the impressionable filly, so they got in trouble once, and the Pink Pony was forced to abandon her friend, vowing to never steal again. Luckly, the event fell into obscurity and the Pink Pony ended up grewing up alone. She had no home and no friends, and was looking at a loney life... But she did not knew, she was gonna have the craziest adventure ever."
 * (Discord): "I'm gonna need MORE Popcorn!"
 * (Alex): You already said that in the Season 4 Premiere.
 * (Discord): So what?
 * (Pinkie): SSHHH!!!
 * Pinkie: (After buying a few groceries with all the farlings she could gain, Singing) Just thinking about tomorrow clears away the cobwebs and the sorrow 'til it's done...
 * (Pinkie): The pink pony seemed to be the nicest to the people of FFA. But not when something goes horribly wrong. (As Pinkie continues singing, some knights appear to be sneaking up on her)
 * Knight #1: There she is!
 * Knight #2: Are you sure this is the pony we're after? She looks innocent and surprisingly peaceful.
 * Knight #1: That is definitely her! The Magic Mirror never lies. Now shut up and let's book her.
 * Pinkie: (Singing) Tomorrow, tomorrow, I love you, tomorrow, you're only a day awa-- (The knights pounce on her) WHOA!!! WHAT'RE YOU DOING?!?...(She appears in shackles)...What's going on here?
 * ???: Don't try to avoid us, Pinkamena Diane Pie! (A Cranky Doodle Donkey-like donkey is seen staring at her menacingly)
 * Pinkie: Officer Kill-Joy? What's going on?
 * Officer Kill-Joy: You're under arrest for the robbery of the Far Far Away Bank!
 * Pinkie: WHAT?!? But, sir, I wouldn't steal anything, honest! I swore off stealing a long time ago.
 * Officer Kill-Joy: Oh, really? Then explain THIS! (Shows her Magic Mirrror, who shows a pony silouette carrying moneybags in her mouth, and her hood falls off, showing Pinkie's face, smiling sinisteringly, and taking off with the money)
 * Pinkie:...But I don't understand! That wasn't me!
 * Officer Kill-Joy: "Oh, then i didn't know you had an evil twin... By the way, I am being sarcastic. Now, nothing personal miss Pie, but until or UNLESS otherwise is proven, I'm afraid you have to come with us."
 * Pinkie: "Then I'm not gonna rest till I've proven my innosence! DOI?!"
 * The knights started to laugh their butts off!
 * Officer Kill-Joy: "No you idiots?! Your gonna let her-" (Pinkie disappears in the blink of an eye)...YOU IDJITS!!! GET HER!!! GET HER, GET HER, GET HER, GET HER!!!
 * Pinkie: (Runs through the alleys as the knights follow hot persuit, then she vanishes, causing the knights to stop)
 * Knight #3:...Where'd she go? (Suddenly, Pinkie pops out of a manhole making a funny face, causing the knights to laugh out of control)
 * (Pinkie): Kill-Joy and his knight birgade knew this very well, the pink pony had a rare psychological disorder called Giggler's Syndrome, which somehow makes her actions 92% funny. She used this ability to escape.
 * (Kowalski): That's not a real syndrome, Pinkie.
 * (Pinkie): I made it up!
 * (SpongeBob): Not everything about a story has to be true, you know.
 * (Kowalski): I should've known that, sorry.
 * (Pinkie): Anyway, back to the story. Even though the pink pony was swift and clever, she was still unable to handle an army of knights coming at her in different directions.
 * Officer Kill-Joy: (Ties a piece of cloth around Pinkie's mouth) Comedy won't save your ass this time, Pinkie-face! Plus, you have the right to remain silent.
 * Pinkie: "MMPH! MMPH?!"
 * Officer Kill-Joy: "Nothing personal kid, but it's a just part of my job."
 * ???: "Hey Jackass?!"
 * ???: "Oh Crome, did you HAD to be so valgur?"
 * Officer Kill-Joy: Aw, shit! Not aga--(A rainbow-colored blade is put on his throat by Rainbow Dash in a more intense version of her Power Pony costume)
 * Chrome Dash: Let the pony go! She is innocent! (Then Fluttershy appears in a costume covered in flowers, leaves, and vines)
 * Natureshy: Chrome, do we have to resort to violence?
 * Chrome Dash: Not now, Natureshy! Call off your guards, and leave this pony alone!
 * Officer Kill-Joy: You don't have the guts to use that blade of yours! (Chrome Dash then uses the blade to scratch Kill-Joy in the face) UAARRRGGGHH!!!
 * Chrome Dash: Try me!
 * Officer Kill-Joy: Alright, alright! Let's go! But you haven't seen the last of us! (The knights and Kill-Joy retreat)
 * Pinkie: Mmph? (Chrome Dash removes the cloth from her mouth)...Whew! What did he wipe with that rag? BLECH!!!...Wait a minute, who are you two?
 * Chrome Dash: I'm Chrome Dash, and this is my trusted sidekick, Natureshy.
 * Naturshy:...Hi.
 * Pinkie: Wow, she's adorable.
 * Chrome Dash: We know you're innocent, Pinkie Pie. And we mean to help you.
 * Pinkie: "You do?"
 * Chrome: "Yep. This was the work of none other then... The Meanie Burgler."
 * Pinkie: "The Meanie Burgler?"
 * Chrome: "Yeah, he's a nortourious master of disguise. Problem is, the guards are stupidly convince he's a myth and can't be shown otherwise until we actselly caught him AND the mask he used."
 * Pinkie: "But why would the Meanie Burgler frame me?"
 * Chrome: "We're, still trying to figure that out. But come with us, and we might find out. There is a city of thugs just 10 miles from here. I know a shady griffin who i busted once, but befriended later when she saved my life from her own murderious mob boss."
 * Pinkie: "You, sure she can be trusted?"
 * Chrome: "If anyone knows the scum of socity, is someone who lives among them. She's kinda our best shot at the moment."
 * Natureshy: "But, she does tend to be, um, pricey."
 * Chrome: "(Sigh), alchorse. You, wouldn't to happen to have 50$ bucks or something, do you?"
 * Pinkie: "All i have is my one 100$ dollar bill i been saving for a speical day, like, i wanted to use it to buy something good for the nurse maid who cared for me."
 * Chrome sighed. she knew this won't be easy.
 * Chrome: "Miss, the friend i knew is not gonna be easy to reason with unless we make it worth her while, and, money is the only thing that makes her talk."
 * Pinkie: "Do.... Do..... Do i have too?"
 * Natureshy: "We're so sorry, but we do wish there was another way..."
 * Pinkie: (Sighs) Well, it's alright. I guess I won't get a better life than just living in an alley buying and cooking your own food by yourself.
 * Natureshy: Oh, I'm so sorry.
 * Chrome Dash: Well, who knows? You might get that chance when you cooperate with us.
 * Pinkie: You really think so?
 * Chrome Dash: Of course I do.
 * Pinkie: (Eyes glitter as Pinkie is touched)...Then let's do it.
 * Chrome Dash: Alright, hold on tight. (Chrome grabs Pinkie's back, and she and Fluttershy fly off)
 * Pinkie: WHOOOAAAHHHH!!!...WHEEEEEEEEEE!!!! I NEVER HAD A VIEW BEFORE!
 * Chrome Dash: Just keep your eyes shut. You ain't wearing any goggles, so the wind might not be that friendly to your eyes.
 * Pinkie: Okay. (Closes her eyes) WHEEEEEE!!! (They fly off into the sunset)
 * Pinkie: 'The Poison Apple'? Doesn't sound like a friendly place. And i thought we were going to a thug city.
 * Chrome Dash: Sorry, i just remembered that in the Shrek universe, there's only this cheap bar instead of a city, so it has to do. This place is filled with the foulest criminals known to Far Far Away! When you're inside a place like this, you must know a few things: 1. Do not stare at one of them in the eye for too long. They don't like how they're looked at, even if their faces look ugly. 2. Act like a gangster or a thug. Any form of heavy kindness will make you an easy target. Knowing you, you should probably use...dirty humor.
 * Pinkie: What?
 * Chrome Dash: And 3. Do not say anything that will prompt them to kick you in the shin. Got it?
 * Pinkie: But I don't wanna use dirty humor!
 * Chrome Dash: Don't worry, you don't have to. You just need to act like a thug. I mean, Natureshy used to be a whiny little coward until I taught her how to act assertively and tough.
 * Natureshy: It's true. But I never felt happy doing it.
 * Chrome Dash: Now let's go inside.
 * A series of fairy tale villains and mythic beast criminals are seen in the bar.
 * An Orc Bartender is seen cleaning a glass mug.
 * Pinkie: Didn't the Ugly Stepsisters used to work here?
 * Orc: Well, they retired as well as all the other fairy tale villains from the shrek movies, all except that nasty Prince Charming, and this entirely different fairy tale villains.
 * Pinkie: Shallow.
 * Chrome: We're lookin' for someone who's willin' to help us with a lil' problem concerning a framed pony. That's this pink lady.
 * Orc: Oh, you mean the Meanie Burglar? Yeah, I saw it on the Magic Mirror News. He has the ability to take the appearence of anyone he touches by using this magical mask he found.
 * Pinkie: I thought he just wore a costume.
 * Orc: Trust me, dude, a costume of you? Who would get something like that other then extreme bronies? Plus, I hear that this guy is a griffin, so, frankly, such a costume wouldn't fit him.
 * Pinkie: Then how did you know it was him?
 * Orc: Oh, that was easy. I know a pink pony like you wouldn't rob a bank. You Equestia ponies take friendship like a realigen, so, criminal ponies are freakishly rare. But if you ask me, I think he's compensating for something.
 * Chrome: Right. Anyway, we're looking for Mean Martha. Have you seen her?
 * Orc: Yeah, she's in the back. But be careful, she's been on some hard times lately. It's best that you don't ask her about it. Also, most of the time frankly, she sometimes doesn't like to be disterbed.
 * Natureshy: Right. Let's move.
 * Chrome, Nature, and Pinkie entered the room.
 * A squack was heard.
 * They look to see Icky dressed like a commen theif.
 * Icky: "Hey, can't you see this is my master's private den?"
 * Natureshy: Look, pal, we're here for business, so buzz off!...
 * Icky:...Okay. (Leaves nervously)
 * Chrome: Wow, Natureshy, I am impressed.
 * ???: Ah, we meet again, Chrome Dash! (A masked griffin appears from the shadows) I can see you need help from your old friend?
 * Chrome Dash: Yes, Martha, we're here because we need some advice about the Meanie Burglar, who he is, and why he framed this pink pony.
 * Mean Martha: Hmm...how will you be paying?
 * Pinkie:...Well, I have this $100 bill. Will it be enough? (Martha snatches it)
 * Mean Martha: Indeed.
 * Mean Martha reveils that, in our reality, she would be known as Gilda. I mean hey, it would make sense why Icky is around here, right?
 * Mean Martha: "But I got to warn ya. The Burgler has protactors in the form of the most insidious bounty hunters ever. Mack and Kelly.
 * Meanwhile, two trolls simular to the Puss in Boots villains, Jack and Jill, are seen slowly walking torwords the Poison apple.
 * Mean Martha: "If anyone becomes a threat to the Meanie Burgler, he sends his nasty troll bodyguards to dispose of them. It's believe in a box that surrounds Mack's hand, holds a key to an abandon, magical fortress once belonged to a tyrant dragon king, before King Fantail and Queen Sun defeated him with might and magic, and sealed him with a curse of stonfication, as he slowly rots within it. The place is delcaired deserted by those idiot burocated guards that are after you, thanks to the Burgler being to smart, and that mask."
 * Chrome: "Well, if the king and queen been there before, then why-"
 * Mean Martha: "Fantail's an over-comident and unreasonable jerk, and while Sun is very reasonable, both of them are convinced that your friend stolen their jewery AND that moeny and gold, and won't even THINK about that old castle. So, tough break getting even them to help you out. And don't expect Kill-Joy to be so easily reasoned with neither. He's equilly convinced by that mask it was your friend. Now, it's possable the burgler realised you guys may be onto him, so his trolls are coming, so you guys need to get out of here before-"
 * Icky came back in!
 * Icky: "Master, Mack and Kelly are here and asking about the ponies?!"
 * Mean Martha: "Damn?! Then you need to follow me! I know another way out!"
 * (Twilight): Shouldn't we lay low on the cussing, please? This is a bedtime story for the Baby Cakes.
 * (Pinkie): Sorry.
 * Mack: (The two of them burst in)...Hello, Boris!
 * Boris the Orc Bartender: What are you two doing here? Get out of my pub!
 * Kelly: Or what?
 * Boris: You are no longer allowed here!
 * Mack: (Lights up a blaster, and blasts one of the dishes behind him) We're not here for another drink! We're after somepony who needs to be stopped.
 * Kelly: The criminal named Pinkie Pie.
 * Boris: Since when do you guys become vigilantes?
 * Mack: The boss needs the pleasure of getting revenge on her. Now, where is she?
 * Boris: She's not here!
 * Kelly: (Grabs Boris by the shirt)...I know you're lying. I can smell her.
 * Mean Martha: (Opens a secret hatch) Come on, down here! (They all enter until Mack and Kelly smell her out and find her)
 * Mack: THERE YOU ARE!!! (Lights the blaster, but it misses Pinkie by a millimeter) Darn it!
 * Martha, Chrome, Nature, Pinkie, and Icky got out.
 * Martha: "You guys need to get out of here! Here, take my dragon horse!"
 * Martha screeched for a Reptilian-like creature coming forth,
 * Martha: "She's very fast and realsillient! She can take you on your journy! Take Ick-a-bod with you."
 * Ick-a-bod: "But Master, i wanna stay and fight with you!"
 * Martha: "I'll distract those trolls for as long as i can. I'm not sure if it's a battle i can win, but i have to make sure they can't get you guys. I need you to wacth over them Ick-a-bod."
 * Before Ick-a-bod can say anything, Martha flew off with a battle cry, as the Dragon Horse began to run off, Ick-a-bod, with a small tear, forces to follow.
 * Martha stood in front of the Trolls.
 * Mack: "You have some nerve getting in the way of US, Martha. Esepically after what you did to our LAST boss."
 * Martha: "Well, exquse me for re-discovering my sense of humanity, Mack!"
 * Mack: "...... But, your a griffin."
 * Martha: "Oh you know what i mean?!"
 * Martha tries to pounce, but is then knocked out by Kelly!
 * Kelly: "We would kill you now, but boss said he has interesting plans for you, Martha."
 * Mack: "Si, and we'll always be around to ensure YOU don't do something to screw us over a-gain!"
 * Mack and Kelly laughed as they dragged away the unconjustus Martha.
 * Chrome Dash: Couldn't it have been easier if we used air travel to escape?
 * Icky: "Don't ask me, ask the narrator telling us to do these things!"
 * (Pinkie): Well, enemies can spot you in the air, can't they?
 * (Kolwalski): Yeah, but why is there a Dragon Horse in Shrek's world?
 * (Twilight): "Yeah, I have to be honest, your story has some plotholes you didn't explain. I mean, what's a dragon horse of all creatures doing all the way out here, and if Martha's a griffin, why doesn't she just fly from place to place, where did these Trolls come form, and shouldn't they attempted to get the key from them SOMEHOW if this "Mack" guy has the key to this dragon tyrant's castle, and most impourently, WHO IS KING FANTAIL AND QUEEN SUN?!"
 * (Shrek): "Yeah, and what exsactly happened to the real king and queen of far far away?"
 * (Discord): "Now, now, everyone, her story, her rules."
 * (Pinkie): "Yeah, those are totally explainable. Martha used the dragon horse as a companion during her evil days, she needs to stay away from authorities that could be waiting to turn her in, Mack and Kelly come from a troll village in Shrek's world, the heroes didn't get the key because they had to be sneaky about it, and King Fantail and Queen Sun are gonna be introduced soon. Also, they're temporarily in charge until the real king and queen return. Besides, it doesn't really matter much because we're telling this to the Baby Cakes, so they're not yet old enough to have a problem with things like that."
 * (Cynder): Oh...good explanations.
 * (Icky's voice cause he was downstairs with the recording of the show): Good thing I didn't have to be bothered to do a Nostalgic "EXPLAIN!!!" gag.
 * (Twilight): Well, I suppose that makes sense you chose a dragon horse because they are fast creatures, and had retractable wing structures that allowed them to glide across gorges.
 * (Pinkie): Yep. So anyway, while the heroes ran off into the night, things weren't going well at the Far Far Away Castle...
 * Lord Shen (As King Fantail): "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DIDN'T CAPTURE THE PINK HORSE YET?!"
 * Officer Kill-Joy and his nights qivered like weaklings at the angered Peacock before them.
 * Kill-Joy: "Well, those vigilantie super ponies got in the way, and uh-"
 * King Fantail: "SILIENCE?! I want all three of them arrested, and sentenced to be hanged, then to have their corpses decapitcated?!"
 * Kill-Joy: "Isn't that over-kill?"
 * King Fantail: "I'M THE KING YOU IDIOTS?! I HAVE THE RIGHT TO BE OVER-KILL?! I HELPED RID EVERYONE OF THE TYRANT DRAGON, AND THIS IS THE THANKS I GET?!"
 * ???: "Dearest husband, please."
 * Celestia, who is Queen Sun, appeared.
 * Queen Sun: "You can't get too angry, remember your blood pressure and your heart condition."
 * King Fantail: (Sighs) You're right. I nearly gave myself a heart attack once. I'm just glad we were picked to be in charge of the kingdom after King Arthur and Queen Lillian went on a business trip. They must be thankful that we kicked that dragon's butt. But still, we owe them AT LEAST ensuring none of their items are in the wrong hands!
 * Queen Sun: "And I perfectly understand that! But I don't think this "Pinkie" is our criminal. I know the mirror does not lie, but at the same time, WHY would she suddenly throw away her promise to herself and the orphanage maid who cared for her just to steal from us?"
 * King Fantail: "THAT'S what we're trying to find out! I suspect her mental illness is getting the servere best of her! She may not be fit for socity, she has to be sent to the FFA Asylum where everyone, even herself, can be safe from her. She might be on the verge of becoming a danger to even herself! You must understand we can't risk such a possable danger."
 * Queen Sun: "I cannot say your wrong about this. But IF she is captured, I want to be the one to speak with her. I can sense truth and lies. And if what i suspect is true, then we might be after the wrong one."
 * King Fantail: "Very well, BUT only IF we capture her. Those vigilanties are gonna make it hard to do so."
 * Queen Sun: "I won't try to convince you otherwise until the truth is reveiled, but ask yourself this. Perhaps, these vigilanties may know more then even us?"
 * King Fantail: "Hmm..... Good thoery, my queen. We'll also have to bring them in for questioning. Though I doubt they'll come in quietly, considering what they did to Oggblar the Orge. I don't think that once imfamous crime lord will be the same again. He's now afraid of, yellow ponies for some reason."
 * Kill-Joy and the knights started to giggled.
 * King Fantail: "I did not instructed you to laugh! Go out there and resume the presuit!"
 * Everyone: YES, SIR!!! (They all left)
 * King Fantail: If this Pinkie pony appears to be innocent, then I shall let her go. If not, I shall have her head in a noose faster than you can say 'grassy green gargoyle'!
 * Queen Sun: Then I have nothing to worry about.
 * Chrome Dash: Alright, everypony, and...'everybody' for Ick-a-bod, we need a plan. Not only will Kill-Joy and his men be hunting us down, but Mack and Kelly will be as well. The best thing we can do now is avoid Kill-Joy AND get that key from Mack and Kelly. But how? (The Dragon-Horse jumps over a gorge, and glides through the air until he reaches the other side)
 * Ick-A-Bod: "Steal from Mack and Kelly? The trolls? How are we suppose to even know where THIER hideout is?! It may most likely be the Dragon Tyrant's lair!"
 * Chrome: "I once heard the troll army that used to served him formed a rural community not too far from the castle. It's possable it's where Mack and Kelly are."
 * Pinkie: "The trolls of the troll village, they're not like that meanie Mack and Kelly, are they?"
 * Chrome: "Evil? no. Terratorial? Possabily. Trolls are not known to welcome visitors not trolls."
 * Ick-a-Bod: And I'm guessing they'd attack us on sight.
 * Chrome: You bet your britches. Trolls are the meanest brutes this side of Far Far Away.
 * Natureshy: Yeah, and they show no sense of decency. One of them called me a mule.
 * Pinkie: (Gasps) Such language!
 * Chrome: Which is why we need to get to Mack and Kelly without being spotted by any of the troll civilians.
 * Pinkie: (Sighs) Sometimes I hate using stealth. That was pretty hard for me and my old friend Xalvador when we were still robbing stuff.
 * Chrome: Well, we have to do it. Trolls don't take kindly to non-troll strangers. Do you still have some stealth left in you?
 * Pinkie: Well, a little. Most of it got replaced after I got my Giggler's Syndrome, but I will do my best.
 * Chrome: Good.
 * The Dragon Horse was rested near a tree.
 * Chrome, Pinkie, Ick-a-bod, and a very cautious and nervious Natureshy, stayed into the shadows as they near the village. Luckally, it was night, so most of the trolls were asleep, exception for most of the night watch, but thankfully, they tend to be slightly imcomident or busy drinking wine.
 * Chrome: Alright, let's stick together if we wanna get through this without being spotted. The night watchers are big jerks when it comes to doing their jobs.
 * Pinkie: By the way, where is Mack and Kelly's place?
 * Chrome: Over there! (Points out a fortress 1 mile from their location)
 * Ick-a-Bod: But it's heavily guarded!
 * Natureshy: How are we gonna get inside?
 * Pinkie: (Thinks for a while)...
 * Pinkie: (A dozen knights guard the entrance of a castle) Aw, no! How are we supposed to get across that, Xalvador? There must be a hundred guards there!
 * Xalvador: It's not the number that counts, Pinkster! It's what goes on in your head that counts. You need to be clever about it like I am. When there's a lot of guards at the entrance, the best way I do it is to distract them. You think you can do that?
 * Pinkie: I think so...
 * Pinkie:...I got it. Let's find a way to distract them.
 * Chrome: Hmm, good thinking. (Grabs a rock, and throws it at one of the guards)
 * Troll #1: OOF! (Falls unconscious)
 * Troll #2: Jonas! (The trolls in the area go to him)
 * Ick-a-Bod: Sweet and sour meatballs! That actually worked. (They all sneak past the trolls unnoticed)
 * Martha is seen dangling in a cage over a huge pool of crocadiles, as Mack and Kelly are heading torwords their seperate bedrooms.
 * Kelly: "Night Mack. We will go to the boss later."
 * Mack: "Agreed, Kelly." (They both leave)
 * Martha:...(Sees the crocodiles down below, and one of them makes a 'I've got my eye on you' gesture to her)...This is SO not worth my time.
 * Natureshy: (The group searches the fortress for Mack)...They could be anywhere in this place!
 * Chrome: Well, my best guess is that they might be in separate bedrooms, so it'll be difficult to find Mack's room.
 * Ick-a-Bod: Plus, this place will be crawling with trolls.
 * Pinkie:...(Thinks again)
 * Pinkie: (She and Xalvador enter the castle, and find multiple hallways)...(Sighs) How are we gonna find the jewels in this HUGE place? It could take us hours to find it.
 * Xalvador: Do not despair. When thieves come in numbers, and can't find their way through, they split up and see if each of them can find what they're looking for.
 * Pinkie: Good idea. But how will we find each other again? We'll need to be together to pull this off.
 * Xalvador: Simple. (Puts on an iron collar, and gives Pinkie a compass) Use this compass. It will show you where I am as long as I still wear this collar. Plus, you'll need one, too. (Puts an iron collar on Pinkie's neck, and takes out another compass) Let's go. (They both split up)
 * Pinkie:...Let's split up.
 * Chrome: "Sounds risky, but pluseable. We'll be able to cover more ground that way. But, how to come back togather afterwords?"
 * Pinkie: We'll split into two teams, me and Natureshy will be Team Pink, and Chrome Dash and Ick-a-Bod will be Team Rainbow. And to make sure we know where each of our teams are...(Takes out some iron collars, and puts them on herself and Chrome Dash)
 * Chrome: What are these pieces of junk?
 * Pinkie: They're iron collars. We'll need them so these compasses will be able to locate each of us. (Takes out two compasses, and gives one to Ick-a-Bod)
 * Ick-a-Bod: Wow, clever strategy, Pinkie. Compasses are attracted to iron real easily. Okay, let's get started. (Each team splits up)
 * Martha sat around, and sighed.
 * Martha: "I made two major mistakes in my life. Going down a life of crime.... And not making sure i get rid of Mack and Kelly for good. Then the Meanie Burgler would've just been some thief with nothing but talk..... And that dang mask."
 * ???: "Master?" (Martha looks behind her to see Chrome and Ick-a-Bod)
 * Martha: Guys!
 * Chrome: Well, this day just got better. (Takes out her rainbow blade, and uses it to pick the lock, trying not to wake up the crocodiles)...
 * Ick-a-Bod: (Sees the crocodiles, dubbed as Timon)...Crocodiles! I hate crocodiles!
 * Chrome: Quiet, Ick-a-Bod! I'm trying to concentrate. Plus, don't wake those crocs up. (Continues picking the lock, then after a while, it works) Yes!
 * Icky: Great! Now let's get out of he--(He suddenly farts, waking up the crocs, which growl at them)
 * Chrome:...Oh, nice job, Ick-a-Butt!
 * Icky: Sorry!
 * Martha: "LET'S GO?!" (They all escaped, leaving the crocs)
 * Crocodile #1: Damn it! Have we ever eaten a prisoner once in a while?
 * Crocodile #2: Yeah. Remember that dumb dodo we ate?
 * Crocodile #1: You mean Dode? He wanted to be eaten, dude!
 * Pinkie: (She and Natureshy sneak through the hallway)...
 * Natureshy:...I'm frightened!
 * They found the bedroom of Mack.
 * Pinkie: "Shh! We're here!"
 * They see that Mack was asleeped, hand disattached from the box.
 * Pinkie: The question is how do we open the box?
 * Natureshy: Well...maybe we could try this. (Summons a vine from the window, and rips off a piece) Pick the lock with this vine.
 * Pinkie: Thanks, Natureshy! (Sneaks up to the box, and starts picking the lock with the vine)
 * Mack:...(Snores, and is about to wake)
 * Pinkie: (Gasps)...(Then thinks)...
 * Pinkie: (She and Xalvador are hiding in a shadow) Whew! That was a close one! We would've been busted if you hadn't come and saved me.
 * Xalvador: And if it weren't for these conveniently places shadow patches, we would've been busted. Remember, Pinkster, darkness is a thief's best friend. Use it to shroud yourself from sight if you can.
 * Natureshy: Pinkie, hide! (Pinkie suddenly finds a shadow right near a wall, and smiles)
 * Mack: (Wakes up, and looks around. He soon sees nothing)...(Sighs) It's probably a squirrel again. (Falls asleep again)
 * Pinkie:...(She and Natureshy were unspotted in the shadows)...Darkness is a thief's ally.
 * Natureshy: Wow, good strategy, Pinkie.
 * Pinkie: Oh, it was nothing. Now, let's get back to business. (Continues using the vine to pick the lock)
 * Natureshy: Gently...gently...(Pinkie gets the box unlocked, and inside was the key to the Meanie Burglar's fortress)
 * Pinkie: Yes! (Gets the key) Let's go!
 * They scram!
 * Martha: Are you sure you know where you're going, Chrome?
 * Chrome: Of course I do. Pinkie ensured us this compass would allow us to locate her when she wears an iron collar.
 * Ick-a-Bod: Well, let's just make sure nobody sees us--(Suddenly, they bump into something)...What the fu--(They see it was Kelly)
 * Kelly: Going somewhere? (Takes out her blaster, and cackles)
 * Martha: I thought you were asleep!
 * Kelly: I was gonna get a drink of water until you creeps showed up! Now I'm gonna land you three straight into prison for good!
 * Chrome: I don't think so! (Takes out her rainbow blade, but Kelly blasts it out of her hooves) OWCH!!! THAT BURNS!!!
 * Kelly: Looks like your days are numbered, pests! (Suddenly, vines pop out from the floor, and tangle up Kelly from the limbs and waist down) What the--?!?
 * Natureshy: I don't think so, missy!
 * Pinkie: Martha? What're you doing here?
 * Martha: Let's just get out of here before--(Suddenly, she gets shot down by the blaster)...Uhhgh...
 * Chrome: MARTHA!...(They turn around to see that Mack has waken up and got the blaster)
 * Mack: Nobody's getting out of this place! (Chuckles)
 * Ick-a-bod: "MASTER?! Oh that is it, buster?!"
 * Ick-a-bod kicks Mack in the crouch!
 * Mack: "YAAAAAOOOOOWWWW?!"
 * Chrome picks up an injured Martha.
 * Chrome:"We got to go, NOW!?"
 * Mack: Not so fast! (Points the blaster at them after recovering from the attack) Nobody moves!
 * Pinkie: Quit trolling around, you jerk! (This makes Mack scoff, trying to hold in laughter)
 * Mack: No, I am a rock! Your silly syndrome cannot affect me--
 * Pinkie: Doikmid! (Mack laughs out loud, dropping the blaster)
 * Chrome: (The group runs away)...What did you say?
 * Pinkie: It's a comedized version of 'Doi'! (Chrome laughs, as well as Ick-a-Bod and Natureshy) Except with a stronger effect. The strongest one I could've used was 'Doinga Dinga Walla-Balla Doing-Dong'. (The group laughs incredibly hard)
 * Chrome: I-I-I can't breathe, I can't breathe! (Laughs)
 * Ick-a-Bod: (Laughs) Guys, is this seriously the time for us to be laughing? We have to escape!
 * Mack: (He and Kelly, who he freed with the blaster, chase them) COME BACK HERE, YOU MULEASS SCUM!!!
 * Natureshy: (Gasps) Such language!
 * (Twilight): Pinkie, what did I say about the cussing?
 * (Trixie): Relax, they're just babies, they can't understand English yet.
 * (Pinkie): Yeah. Now, back to the story.
 * Chrome: (Shoots rainbow waves at the trolls, but they dodge them)
 * Ick-a-bod: "Persisent bunch, we'll give them that!"
 * Chrome: Well, of course. Trolls are relentless when it comes to doing their jobs. They're literally animals.
 * Natureshy: (Uses her powers to trap Mack and Kelly in a Venus flytrap)
 * Ick-a-Bod: Nice going there, Natureshy!
 * Natureshy: It won't kill them, but it will keep them contained until we get out of here. Let's go! (They leave, and reach the door, and Natureshy uses her powers to trap every troll in vines, and reach the Dragon Horse, and take off)
 * Mack: (He and Kelly get out of the Venus flytrap, and see that the group had gotten away) I hate ponies!
 * Kelly: THIS IS WAR!!!
 * Martha was breathing heavily.
 * Chrome: "Martha, your tougher then this, you need to fight!"
 * Ick-a-bod: "Master, be strong please! I would be nothing without?!"
 * Martha: "In the castle, the Dragon Tyrant had a heal-all potion sealed within where the mask was found in the castle. It's most likely guard by hired goons for the Meanie Burgler."
 * Chrome: "Good to know, but I don't think your injured that badly. We need to take the time in healing you. You need help."
 * Ick-A-Bod: "She won't make it when we get to that castle! What're we gonna do?!"
 * A horn was heard.
 * Everyone looks to see in the distent, the birgade of Kill-Joy's knights, lead by his-truely.
 * Pinkie: "It's Kill-Joy!"
 * Martha: "Go! Go on, without me."
 * Ick-A-Bod: "Master no!"
 * Martha: "Look, I'll distract Kill-Joy and those goons long enough, plus, they would deem me impourent on infomation."
 * Chrome: "Are you sure about this? The minute they finish healing you, if they even would, they're gonna arrest you!"
 * Martha: "Well, better a jailbird then a dead men."
 * Pinkie: "But your a girl, and a griffin."
 * Martha: "You know what i mean! Now go! I'm done running from crooks. It's about damn time i payed my dept to socity."
 * Ick-A-Bod: "Then I'm going down with ya master! I won't abandon ya so easily this time, not even if you want me too!"
 * Chrome Dash sighed.
 * Chrome: "God's speed, Martha."
 * Chrome Dash grabbed Pinkie and Natureshy and escaped before even seen by the Knights on the Dragon Horse.
 * Ick-A-Bod stayed close to Martha.
 * eventally, marching clanks are heard, as Knights surrounded the duo.
 * Kill-Joy approuched Martha and Ick-A-Bod.
 * Kill-Joy: "Well..... What happened here?"
 * Ick-A-Bod: "Please help us. She has something very serious about who really stolen the jewels, and a conspirity against an innosent pony. You need to listen."
 * Kill-Joy sighed. he knows well that he met Pinkie before when she was a filly, back when he was younger. When he first came to that orphanage.
 * A Younger Kill-Joy was staring down at the Orphanage nurse-maid, who we knew as Ms. Cake, who is called Mother Den in this reality (a play on Denmother, if you will.)
 * Kill-Joy: "Madum, I know this is a grave inconnveniences, but we suspect one of the orphans here were involved in a major thieaf recently and i came to diliver justice."
 * Mother Den: "Mister Guard, please, she didn't meant too, she promised she won't do this again, she had a bad influence and is very impressionable, talk to her yourself, she's only a misguided child, please!"
 * Kill-Joy:...(Sighs) Very well. I shall speak with her in person.
 * Kill-Joy: Okay, Ms. Pie, what do you know about the theft of a precious diamond called the Red Star of Aurora.
 * Filly Pinkie: Well, mister, I didn't want to steal it. I was getting not-so-comfortable feelings about doing it, but Xalvador was suspecting it, and...well...I don't know what to think after that.
 * Kill-Joy: What about this Xalvador fellow?
 * Pinkie: Well, he threatened to...(Gulps)...(Xalvador: You must always follow a thief's orders, Pinkie! We are partners, and no one leaves their partner behind! Remember that!)...We made a bet that I could actually touch the diamond without triggering the alarm, and I lost...
 * Kill-Joy: That makes...no sense.
 * Pinkie: Wha...sure it does!
 * Kill-Joy: Pinkie, I want the truth! Who is Xalvador?
 * Pinkie, under a guilty coneunce, was forced to admit it.
 * Pinkie: "Remember that little griffin cub the other guard caught? That's him. He's not a bad griffin, he's just troubled. He had a bad daddy, and a dead mommy, and, and, (cries), and a sister who loved him, but couldn't afford to care for him anymore. He was taken her as a result."
 * (Discord): "Whoa, Pinkie. Be careful not to turn this into a sudden tear-jerker or the babies are gonna cry again!"
 * Pinkie: "Xal, wanted to become a great thief as a result. He thinks socity and the higher forces abandoned them like his sister. Please don't punished Xal too badly! He doesn't know what he's doing neither?!"
 * Kill-Joy: "...... (Sigh), I'm afraid i can only enforce the law, I'm not entitled to indict punishments. I'm sorry, but all i can say, I hope for his sake that the King and Queen are in a reasonable mood. The Red Star was once a creation of the fallen Dragon Tyrant now being used for good porposes, and we can't risk ANYTHING happening to it. Rumors are saying it's litterally the only thing keeping the Dragon Tyrant in his prison of stone, and even a slight crack, would break that seal. Do you understand why Xal is looking at a serious offence?"
 * Pinkie: Well, how was I or Xalvador able to know that? Why couldn't it get a different name?
 * Kill-Joy: Why do you think it was locked up tight?
 * Pinkie:...So THAT'S what that label was for.
 * Kill-Joy: So I have no choice but to turn him in for his crime.
 * Pinkie:...(Sighs) But he's the only friend I've got.
 * Kill-Joy: I'm sorry, but he needs to see what would've happened if he was to have kept that gem.
 * Pinkie: Okay. Just don't be too hard on him.
 * Xalvador:(Being taken away by guards) PINKIE! HELP ME!! HELP ME!!!
 * Pinkie: I...I'm so sorry.
 * Xalvador:...You told them?
 * Pinkie: I had to. I had no choice. All I can say is...good luck.
 * Xalvador:...YOU BITCH!!! YOU BETRAYED ME!!! YOU DESERTED ME!!! I SWEAR TO YOU, YOU ARE GONNA PAY FOR THIS!!!
 * Suddenly music started up and a random announcer spoke.
 * Announcer: Tonight on K.N.I.G.H.T.S.
 * Kill-Joy was silent.
 * Knight: "Sir?"
 * Kill-Joy: "Take the Griffin Girl and the Bird, thing, back to camp to the medic. I'll, continue this on my own. I think i have a good guess what is REALLY going on."
 * neither knight questioned this, and took away Martha and Ick-A-Bod.
 * Kill-Joy began to walked on his own.
 * Kill-Joy: I know your out there, Meanie Burgler. You can run but you can't hide from the law!
 * Pinkie, Chrome and Natureshy finally made it.
 * Pinkie: "It's even scareier then i thought."
 * Chrome: "Well, the dragon tyrant was evil, so it makes snese for his fortress to be like this."
 * Natureshy: "Chrome, I'm starting to feel, unsure about this."
 * Chrome: "To be honest, even I feel uneasy around this place. This castle has never seen many visitors, even AFTER Fantail and Sun defeated the Dragon Tyrant. And who's to blame them? This place is like, a dark, forbidden ruin. There's no telling what secrets too dark to be known awaited in there."
 * Pinkie: But are you sure it's a good idea to barge in some massive meanie-bobeanie dragon's castle like you own it?
 * Chrome: "It's risky, i know. There's probuly troll guards in there in leage with the Meanie Burgler, considering the fact Mack and Kelly are with him. But I do have a sneakier way. We find an un-repaired hole in the castle, and stick to safer routes in the castle."
 * Pinkie: (Gulping) That's what I'm afraid of!
 * Chrome: "Look, just stay close to me, and we'll see this through."
 * Natureshy: Yes. You'll be allright while your save under our roof.
 * Chrome: "Now, I'll survay the area for a hole in the castle. You two stay here, I'll be right back."
 * Chrome flew off.
 * Natureshy: Be careful, Chrome!
 * Chrome looked at alot of holes, but some are either too small, hazordious, or would lead to a dead-end or even trouble. Eventally, she sees a hole near a giant tower, completely unguarded and unlook at.
 * Chrome smiled, as a squee was heard, but was quick to escape before a night watch troll took notice.
 * Chrome made it back to Pinkie and Natureshy.
 * Chrome: "I found a hole completely unguarded and unlooked at. We just have to be careful, and move fast."
 * Natureshy: "Oh boy, where is it?"
 * Chrome: "At the grand tower, where the statue of the cursed Dragon Tyrant resides, posed in his final moments of defeat."
 * Natureshy: "Meep."
 * Chrome: But we need to be stealthy, the whole place is gonna be guards patrolling the fortress at every turn.
 * Chrome began to sneak in the area. Eventally, they reach the hole, and after waiting for a Night Watch Troll to leave, they go in it.
 * As Chrome, Pinkie, and Natureshy enter, they see none-other, then the giant statue of the Dragon Tyrant.
 * Chrome: "There it is, ladies. What is left of the terror of this land. It's believed that cause he's a statue for so long, he may as well be dead at this point."
 * Pinkie noticed that there's a wooden walkway on tthe statue.
 * Pinkie: "Where, there's a walkway on the statue."
 * Chrome: "I once heard rumors about the statue of the Dragon Tyrant is big enough to be a fortress of itself. A fortress within a fortress. Guess they were right. Come on, we're going in."
 * Chrome grabbed Pinkie and flew off. Luckly, the area is momentarly empty. They reached the head, which was it's jaw was open, as what appears to be stone steps are inside.
 * Natureshy: "Do-dodododo-do we really have to go, in t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-there?"
 * Pinkie: Do we have another choice here?
 * Chrome: "I wish i could say otherwise. This looks like the only opening."
 * Natureshy sighed in defeat.
 * Natureshy: Ok.
 * A seemingly endless row of stairs are seen, as in the background, the bones of the Dragon Tyrant are seen.
 * Chrome: "There's litterally nothing alive left in here."
 * Natureshy: Except the bones of the Dragon Tyrant.
 * Chrome: "I meant something CURRENTLY alive."
 * Natureshy: "Oh...."
 * Suddenly, Pinkie spots a small light on a small shack within the far below of the statue.
 * Pinkie: "Guys. look down there!"
 * Chrome: "A shack in the statue? Clever. I bet the Meanie Burgler assumed anyone would be too afraid to even come down in this statue, so he hid his loot here."
 * The trio investigate the shack, and found the stolen money, and the royal jewels.
 * Pinkie: "We did it! We found the jewels!"
 * Chrome: "Now, let's get this stuff out of here, then, we're gonna go after the Burgler. Natureshy, bring out the sack."
 * Natureshy: Ok!
 * Natureshy brings out a sack, and begins to collect the loot. However, shadows loomed over the Ponies.
 * ???: "Oh, look who's hooves we caught in the cookie jar!"
 * The trio looked to see Mack, Kelly, and a good sum of Guard Trolls!
 * Chrome: "Everyone run! I'll hold them off!"
 * Suddenly, two extra trolls grabbed Pinkie and Natureshy!
 * Mack: "You have choice, rainbow horse, your coming in quietly, or friends get it bad."
 * The trolls bring out swords.
 * Chrome growled, but sighed in defeat.
 * Kelly: "Not so reshorseful now, eh pony?"
 * The trolls laughed.
 * The trolls eschorted the ponies to a desk that stood infront of an old, abandon, and ruined thrown of the Dragon Tyrant.
 * Mack: "Hey boss, we got the ponies."
 * Kelly: Yeah, a bunch of rats that stuck their pesky noses where they don't belong!
 * The chear behind it reveiled Pinkie, but since this isn't the real Pinkie, the imposter then removed an enchanted mask. It was a Male Griffin.
 * Pinkie: "(Gasp), Xalvador!?"
 * Chrome: "You knew this guy?"
 * Xalvador: Pinkamena Dianna Pie, it's been a very long time.
 * Pinkie started to cry.
 * Pinkie: "Y-y-y-y-y-y-y-your, the meanie burgler?"
 * Xalvador: "Well gee, considering that Mack just called me boss, and that the Meanie Burgler for some reason picked you for being the jailbait, I guess I STINKING AM?!"
 * Pinkie: "But, why do this to me?"
 * Xalvador: "(Laughs), Oh, Pinkie, you were never any bright to be honest. Remember what i said when you ratted me out on the Red Star mess that happened years ago?"
 * Pinkie: You're not still ticked off about that day, are you?
 * Xalvador: You're still always good for a laugh, Pinkie. And this time, It's not because of mental imperfections, no, it's because how intellectually insuperior you are. You were always easy to talked into doing things Pinkser. The best part? I am more then ever closer to get even with you for good!
 * Chrome: "How did you get these Trolls, let alone Mack and Kelly, to help you when trolls are known to hate non-troll strangers?"
 * Natureshy: Please?
 * Xalvador: Well, since miss Natureshy used the 'P' word I just let the boys explain. Mack, would you do the honors?
 * (Discord): "Oh, i love these clishe Villain expositions."
 * Mack: Xalvador, Kelly and my boys go way back.
 * Pinkie: "You do?"
 * Kelly: Oh yeah. We sure do!
 * Xalvador: "Well, it all started when i escaped Prison at my teens...."
 * We see the same Prison that held Shrek and friends back in Shrek 2 as a few guards were doing their evening rounds.
 * (Xalvador): "I was trapped in the worse place ever thanks to a certain pony, destin to be a another set of bones in there, when lunk desided to smile on me for once."
 * A few guards were making their way to Xalvador's cell though it was completey heavly guarded.
 * A guard: "State your business."
 * Guard 2: We're here to give Xalvador his dinner.
 * Guard: "Go right ahead."
 * The guard allowed them to proceed and they enter an elevater.
 * Guard 1: Take us down.
 * Bellhop: "Ok sir."
 * The Bellhop presses a button down.
 * The Elevator went down into the tortue chamber where Xalvador's cell is located.
 * Xalvador is seen chained to the wall.
 * Xalvador: What do you pigfaces want?
 * Guard: Relax, we come in peace. (The two guards reveal theirselves to be Mack and Kelly in disguise)
 * Xalvador: Wha--trolls? What're YOU doing here?
 * Mack: I am Mack and this is Kelly. Our master has decided to choose you for helping him with a plan that will allow you to get revenge on all the people who wronged you.
 * Xalvador: Really?...What kind of idiot do you think I am?
 * Kelly: You think we're joking?
 * Xalvador: Uh, yeah! Trolls tend to be tricksters, obviously!
 * Mack: "Those, are internet trolls. We're the traditional medevil trolls that would normally live in the woods, or under a bread and eat goats."
 * Xalvador: I meant some trolls in this land TEND to be tricksters. One time, a troll was like...
 * Troll: Hey, what's that up under there?
 * Xalvador: (Looking behind him) Up under where?
 * Troll: 'Up underwear'? Okay. (Puts a pair of underwear on Xalvador, and gives him a wedgie)
 * Xalvador: YAAOOOWWW!!!
 * Mack:...Okay, we're not like those trolls at all neither. We can help you get revenge on Pinkie for turning you in.
 * Xalvador: How do you know Pinkie?
 * Kelly: Oh, we know. Our boss is a fortune-teller. Said he used to work for the Dragon Tyrant. Now, he's willing to help you out.
 * Xalvador:...I don't believe you.
 * Mack: Okay, look, do you want revenge or not, you avian feline?
 * Xalvador: Yeah.
 * Kelly: Then come with us. (Uses pins to clip the locks, and free Xalvador)
 * Xalvador: "Ok then, let's get to work."
 * (Xalvador): "Eventally, I met up with the fortune-teller, who has a strange desire for wigs for some reason, who he gave me this very mask that was a product of the Dragon Tyrant, which helped me pull off my heist effertlessly."
 * Xalvador: "Sadly, I just found out the fortuneteller had enemies in the form of your new friends here who were onto him from the start."
 * Chrome: "Yeah, we were. Speaking of which, WHERE ARE YOU, WIG-MASTER?! WE KNOW YOUR THE MASTERMIND BEHIND ALL THIS?!"
 * ???: "((Laughs), I was never the one to disappoint."
 * A hooded stranger appeared.
 * Chrome: "Wig-Master."
 * ???: (Sighs) For the last time, DO NOT CALL ME THAT!!! My real name is Bogdan! Bogdan Brunoopee. (Everyone except the baddies laughed) SHUT UP!!!
 * Pinkie: "(Laughs), I think you should've stuck to Wig-Master! It's less laughable then, BOGDAN BRUNOO-PEE?!"
 * Cause of this, everyone, even the bad guys but the Mysterious one started to laugh thanks to the Giggler Syndrone.
 * Xalvador: "We're so sorry sir, But, but, she has a rare syndrome that SOMEHOW makes everyone else (laughs), laugh at what she saids?!"
 * Kelly: (Laughs) Well this can't get any worse!
 * ???: "ENOUGH?!"
 * The stranger reveiled himself to be a being simular to Rumplestilskin, But since he is wearing a clearly fake wig, there's indecation he's bald.
 * Wig Master: "I was a mage of darkness for the Dragon Tyrant for years until his, untimely fate by Fantail and Sun, and I still expect to be treated with dignity, blast it!"
 * Chrome: "In all honesty though, you may wanna stick to Wig-Master, people are not gonna laugh at you as much."
 * Wig Master: "(Frustracted groan), FINE! But only until i get people to fear the name of, well, my real name!"
 * Pinkie: "Why are you making Xalvador do this mean things?!"
 * Wig Master: "Let's just say, it's a series of complicated planning your simple mortal mind would not be able to process."
 * Chrome: "I bet it's all about bringing the Dragon Tyrant back, is it?"
 * Wig Master: "Sadly, thanks to Sun and Fantail, he's been a statue for too long now, and he's now dead at this point, he's basicly a corpse in cement now! So, in our breaking hearts for the greatest tyrant who nearly congured the side of light, is no longer with us. But, I intent of taking his place as the new powerful dark master in town, once i gain control of the red star, and use it to turn what is tragicly left of the Dragon Tyrant as my weapon of mass destruction! Everyone gets what we want, Xalvador gets his revenge on you, The trolls get revenge on the humans for years of bloodshed against their kind, and I get to have what is left of my master, destroy Far Far Away, Fantail and Sun, AND That stupid brat Arthur and his flimsy whench! With the soon-to-be living Statue Monster of The Dragon Tyrant by my side, conguring this world will be as easy as, well, conguring the world with a Dragon Statue Monster! My real named will be the causer of screams and flinching, NOT LAUGHTER?! No one, not even my old high school bully Clem will never mock me again?!"
 * Pinkie: "Wait, your doing this because you had bully issues? Setting loose an evil dragon monster statue apawn the world is no way to do it!"
 * Wig Master: "Super-Villain, don't care what the good guys or the innosent say about me or my methods, cause I'm a jerk like that?!"
 * Kelly: Well explaining your plan's going in the right direction.
 * Wig Master: Well It's time to bring the Dragon Tryant back now so I guess your all spit out of luck. It'll take a miracle to stop me--
 * ???: "WIG MASTER?!"
 * Wig Master: What the Devil?!?
 * Kill-Joy was seen standing on a hole in a broken wall.
 * Wig Master: "Oh...... Uh, Officer Kill-Joy, uh, this is just a cosplay we're doing.... We were just about too.... Have a Tea Party."
 * Pinkie: "YAY! I LOVE TEA PARTIES?!"
 * Kelly, Mack and the other trolls groaned in annoyence!
 * Xalvador: How did you find us!
 * Killjoy: "Well, it's easy. I just look for an old, decrepted, ruin castle with a giant tower. Seriously you guys, this is litterally like the first place to find ya'll here."
 * Wig Master: "...... Ok, maybe I didn't think that through, but it won't matter in the longer shot!"
 * Troll guards surrounded Kill-Joy.
 * Wig Master: "Cause as you see, my curse-word named animal friend, I have trolls up the was-su in here! And the best part, it's night-time! And in the day time, i cursed this place to be in ever-lasting shadow and in the areas near the castle's lands but Far Far Away thanks to that bitch sun horse! And you are alone, Kill-Joy. Outnumbered by Trolls, your just gonna end up another corpse in this old ruins, and NO ONE IS GONNA-"
 * Suddenly the sound of seriens was heared as Far Far Away Police Department hot air baloons were seen abouve the fortress.
 * Kill-Joy: You guys fought I came here alone, did ya?
 * I fought the law (The Clash verson) was played as the knights broke into the fortess and a hysterical battle began. And soon the trolls became the losing side of the battle.
 * Wig Master and Xalvador secretly escaped.
 * Chrome: "Now's our chance to really kick troll butt?!"
 * Mack and Kelly armed their guns at Chrome, Pinkie, and Natureshy.
 * Mack: "You ponies are not gonna ruin everything so easily!?"
 * Kill-Joy blasted the guns from Mack and Kellys.
 * Kill-Joy: You boys got one more chance to give yourselfs up!
 * Mack grabs Kill-Joy!
 * Mack: "The only one we would ever fear is the King and Queen! And last time i check, YOUR NEITHER?!"
 * ???: Excuse me?!?
 * Mack: "What the-?"
 * Pinkie: Hey are those-?
 * Chorme and Natureshy: Your majesties!
 * Mack And Kelly: "Ooh, Boosha."
 * Kill-Joy: Yep, I know.
 * Suddenly, light appeared throughout the room!
 * Mack: "OH NO! SUNLIGHT?! AND WE HAD TO BE THE STERIOTYPICAL TROLLS WHO TURN TO STONE APAWN IMPACT?! WHY COULDN'T WE BE LIKE MODERN ONES WHO ARE ONLY WEAK TO FIRE AND THAT'S IT?!"
 * Kelly: "I BLAME THE WRITERS?!"
 * Mack and Kelly screamed!
 * As the Sun hits Mack, Kelly and the other trolls on impact, they turned instantly into stone.
 * Chorme: Well, I guess that takes care of them.
 * The Queen: But where are Wig Master and Xalvador?
 * Kill-Joy: I saw them secretly got away during the fight but the two cowards wont get too far.
 * King Fantail: Guards, tear this fortress apart, seal off the the kingdom and find out where are those two villains are cowering!
 * Xalvador: "Oh man, oh man, oh man, we're toast?! The trolls are either stone or have retreated at this point?! We're done for man! We're done for!?"
 * Wig Master: "Quiet, you weakling! I am consintacting?! I am teleporting the red star here for one, last, surprise."
 * The Wig Master broughts out the red star out of magical nowhere.
 * Wig Master: "Which starts, now."
 * The Wig Master laughs as a mixture of dark magic and the red stars own magic begans to bring the statue to golum-like life.
 * The Statue of the Dragon Tyrant roared!
 * Wig Master teleported on the head of the Living Statue!
 * Wig Master: "SUCCESS?! NOW THOSE FOOLS WON'T KNOW WHAT HIT THEM?! And, as for you, Xally....."
 * Wig Master fatally zapped Xalvador into a wall!
 * Wig Master: "Consider our partnership, terminated on the grounds that I'M AN ASSHOLE?!"
 * Wig Master laughed as the Statue destroyed the tower, exited the castle, and started to stomp torwords Far Far Away!
 * (Discord) Wait wait wait! The Rumpelstitskin-look-a-like creep staps Xalvador in the back and pulls off his scheme anyway? This is a little anti-climatic isn't it?
 * (Shrek) Discord, the story isn't over yet.
 * (Discord): Sorry but still, he's not going to get away with this is he? I don't mind alittle choas, and i acknowledged Xalvador was no saint, but seriously?! This little butt-sucking sadist went into complete monster terratory, SURELY, YOU PLAN TO HAVE SOME FORM OF COMMUPENCE!?
 * (Pinkie): You said it yourself, Dissy. My story, my rules. It'll be taken care of soon.
 * Pinkie: XALVADOR! (She and Kill-Joy run up to him) Are you hurt?
 * Xalvador:...He...betrayed me!...THAT SON OF A--(Cracks are heard, and he groans in pain)...Urrggghhh!!! MY BACK!
 * Pinkie: Oh my gosh, he's hurt bad!
 * Kill-Joy: Let me take a look. I have some medical experience. (Examines Xalvador's injuries)...Well, the impacts have broken many parts in his body. His right wing is broken, he's got a sprained left hind foot, his beak is broken, and the force of Wig-Master's magic has caused a gaping wound in his chest.
 * Pinkie: No!
 * Kill-Joy: But he can be saved. These injuries can heal in a couple of weeks if we can get him to the hospital.
 * Pinkie:...(Gets angry) Alright, Bogdan Wig-Nut, your butt is going DOWN!
 * Silence.
 * Pinkie: "..... Just as soon i figure out how... I mean, HOW DO YOU FIGHT A GIANT STATUE DRAGON MONSTER?!"
 * Xalvador:...Pinkie...find soe kind of...weakspot--(Crack) AARRGGHH!!!...I find weakspots of those who are physically superior than us...Urrrggghh!!
 * Pinkie: Got it. Thanks for the advice, Xalvador.
 * Xalvador: I'm sorry....I'm sorry I framed you...Pinkie.
 * Pinkie: Well, I guess I can accept it. Kill-Joy, get him someplace safe. CHROME? (Chrome flies down to her) See if you can find some kind of hot spot on this behemoth.
 * Chrome: What?
 * Pinkie: You know, weakspot.
 * Chrome: Oh. Okay. I'll try.
 * Natureshy: (Uses her plant manipulation to tangle the Tyrant Dragon monster in vines) URRRGGGGHHH!!! (The vines are unfortunately too weak to hold him, and it roars)
 * Chrome: NATURESHY, HELP ME FIND THIS THING'S HOT SPOT!!!
 * Natureshy: What?
 * Chrome: WHAT?
 * Natureshy: I said 'What?'.
 * Chrome: I CAN'T HEAR YOU!!!
 * Natureshy: "I SAID WHAT?!"
 * Chorme: "HELP ME FIND THIS THINGS WEAK-SPOT?!"
 * Wig Master tried to zap Chrome, but missed!
 * Wig Master: "I CAN HEAR YOUR YELLING YOU KNOW, YOU FEM-DUMBASSES!?"
 * Chrome: Oh, poo! (Takes out her rainbow blade) Then I guess I'll have to find it by force! (Flies up towards the Dragon Tyrant monster, and uses her blade to slice off one of the monster's arms) HAH! (Suddenly, the dislocated arm levitates back into place)...AW, COME ON!!! (The monster smacks Chrome to a wall) OOF!!!
 * Wig-Master: (Cackles) You puny fools cannot stop me! Soon, I shall destroy Far Far Away, and allow trolls to live happily ever after forever!...Okay, that sounded weird.
 * ???: No, you won't! (Suddenly, King Fantail and Queen Sun appear)
 * Queen Sun: We defeated your master before, Wig Master! And I swear to you, we can do it again!
 * Wig-Master: Oh, really? With his power maximized by the tainted Red Star of Aurora? I don't think that'll be possible!
 * Queen Sun: We shall see! (She and Fantail activate their powers, and prepare to defeat the monster quickly, blasting a powerful laser at him at the same moment the monster does, causing a magic beam lock)
 * Unluckly for Wig Master, dispite his best attempts to assist. Sun's and Fantail's beam started to destroy The Dragon Tyrant's dying power's thanks to the forementioned dragon being long dead and any remaining magic started to fade. Eventally.....
 * BOOM!
 * The Wig Master fell screaming as the Dragon Tyrant's statue body fell in pieces!
 * Wig Master: "I WAS CAREFUL!? I WAS SO CAAAAAAAAAAREFUUUUUUUUUUUUl!?"
 * Wig Master scream as he vanished further to the ground, being obscured by falling stone and bones.
 * King Fantail: "Well..... That was oddly easy."
 * BLAM! BOOM! CRASH!?
 * Piles of broken rocks and bones are everywhere.
 * A hand holding a cristail ball is seen outside of a rock, thus showing Wig Master may be finally gone.
 * The heroes stood in front of this.
 * Natureshy: "Chrome.... Is he...."
 * Chrome: "I didn't want it to end like this, Nature. I actselly, feel kinda sorry for him. He did this cause he was a victim of bullying, ended up becoming worse in the progress."
 * King Fantail: But at least he was put out of his misery.
 * Pinkie: So, Kill-Joy? This means I'm cleared of the charges?
 * Kill-Joy: Certainly. But I think I find it in my heart to forgive Xalvador for being blinded with revenge by Wig-Master.
 * Pinkie: Well, is he gonna be okay?
 * Kill-Joy: Well...I don't know. His injuries are too severe. However, it doesn't mean he's dying. We fixed his injuries, and sowed up his deep wounds. They'll take weeks to heal. I don't know if Xalvador will live or not. All I know is that he is lucky to still be alive.
 * Pinkie:...Well, I can't help but blame myself for all the trouble he went through. I was the one he depended on for so long since his family abandoned him. We were both like family. We both had parents that never came to see us grow up. And I turned him in. It was all my fault...(Starts sobbing softly as her hair slowly stops being puffy)
 * Queen Sun: (Comforts Pinkie) It was not your fault, Pinkie. You did what you thought was right. If you hadn't turned him in, he might've already been dead. You had no other choice.
 * Pinkie: I know, but...he's injured now! He's the closest friend I ever had in my life, not to mention the first. Nobody else in the orphanage liked me because I was too selfish at the time. Xalvador made me see how to become a more self-aware pony
 * Chrome: "........ Pinkie, if it helps..... Wig Master keeps an old spellbook in his private Tower not to far from the Dragon Tyrant's castle, that may hold a great healing spell great enough to help him. I know where his tower is, and I know an old freind from this magic shcool powerful enough to use it. I hope it helps."
 * Pinkie: "But..... What if only Wig Master can use it?"
 * Chrome: "Well, I heard talk that once a magic user dies, his/her book can be free to be offitcally belong to someone else if they used it even once. It's an unclear rumor, but it's our best shot."
 * Pinkie: Well, who's gonna use the spell on him?
 * Queen Sun: Don't worry, Pinkie. I know this someone Chrome mentioned who can do it. I'd like to do it myself, but I'm afraid my magic cannot be used to heal those who are dying.
 * Pinkie: Who is it?
 * King Fantail: "She's mostly known as "Professor Spell Light"."
 * Queen Sun: She is a great teacher. Chrome said she is one of my greatest fans and reads some of my magic books. So I am sure she'll be the perfect pony for the job.
 * Pinkie: Well, we gotta hurry. I don't know how long Xalvador has left to live.
 * Pinkie was pacing nerviously.
 * Chrome: (Comes out) She said she can do it.
 * Pinkie: Oh, thank goodness! (Spell Light comes out in a purple dress, along with a more regal hairdo)
 * Spell Light: "Just give me time to consintract enough manner."
 * Pinkie was pacing even more nerviously.
 * Pinkie: C'mon, Light, Xalvador is dying! We don't have much time!
 * Spell Light: (Comes out) Alright, I think I've learned the spell now. Don't worry, Pinkie. Xalvador is gonna be okay once I perform this spell on him.
 * Pinkie: You're really willing to help a stranger?
 * Spell Light: Yeah. I went to the same orphanage you went to. I saw all those fillies bully you.
 * Pinkie: You mean...you're the filly they called 'Ms. Spellsy'?
 * Spell Light: Indeed. They always made fun of me too because I was always so enthusiastic and skilled in magic.
 * Pinkie: Wow...I can't believe I never got the chance to know you.
 * Spell Light: Now come on, let's go save your friend.
 * Pinkie was pacing waiting for the final news.
 * (Discord): "Aw, this again!? Can we please wrap this up?!"
 * (Icky): "Chillax, Cordy, it's all gonna be wrapped up in a nice little bow soon enough."
 * Pinkie: (Spell Light came out, and looked at Pinkie) Well?
 * Spell Light: Well, I don't really know. When I used the spell on him, he didn't seem to do anything. He just laid there like a dead fish. I think it's because the spell is slowly repairing his major injuries, and the book said that the process takes only 5 minutes.
 * Pinkie: So he'll be okay?
 * Spell Light: Well, there are just 4 minutes left, so when he wakes up, we'll know for sure. The doctor says you can come in and see him of you want.
 * Pinkie: Well, that was very nice of him. Let's go.


 * Pinkie: Please, Xalvador, please be okay in the next 15 seconds. You're the only close friend I ever had behind the friends I just made now. (7 seconds)


 * Spell Light: 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1...(Nothing)


 * Pinkie:...Xalvy?...Xalvy?...No!...(Hair gets straightened again, and Pinkie starts sobbing softly on Xalvador's body)...Xalvador, no!...Please! (Starts crying)...


 * (Twilight): I thought we were gonna law low on the drama.


 * (Pinkie): Relax, it's not that much longer.


 * Xalvador: (Gets up)...God, that was the weirdest near-death experience I've ever had. Sometimes, I find it weird that magic doesn't seem to escape me.


 * Pinkie:...(Hugs him) You're alive!


 * Xalvador:...Aw, Pinkie. (Hugs her back)


 * Spell Light: Well, that was pretty touching.


 * Pinkie: So, I guess this means you'll change your ways of being a thief?

Reality.
 * Xalvador: Oh, definitely! I'm tired of being pushed around from even those who I work for.
 * (Pinkie): "So, Everyone lived happly ever after, alot of problems are resolved quickly and, well, people are happy now. The, End."
 * Sparx: "Great story Pinks. I wonder if the B.Cs will finally sle-" (The babies start crying again)...Crap!
 * Pinkie: Aw, come on!
 * Twilight: I told you not to add any drama to your story, Pinkie.
 * Pinkie: I don't think it's because of the drama. I think it's because they still wanna hang out with the Lodgers.
 * Mr. Krabs: Well, yeah, we are loved by even infants.
 * Sandy: Ah, scoot over, varmits! I'll show yas' all a better story to put these kiddies to bed. (Takes out some mini-cowboy hats, and puts them on the Baby Cakes' heads)
 * Applejack: Oh, boy. Somethin' tells me this will be a Western story.
 * Sandy: Actually, it's a Southern story. I'm not exactly from a state like Nevada or Arizona. It's what's in the far South that I make this story take place.
 * Discord: Good, because I didn't want this to be a Rango ripoff.
 * Sandy: Well, this sotry is based on alot of dreams i Had of being like my faverite comic book hero we have in my variation of Texas: Sheruff Sandra Snady, a hero of the old west who fights the dispicable Outlaws Dirthy Dan, Pinhead Larry, Duck-Billed Benny, and more of that nature."
 * She brings out such a comic book as we enter the story.

Story 2: Western Hoedown
Alternate Reality: Old West Texas. Bank. Outside the bank.
 * Familier Music plays as the camera pans torwords a Texas town.
 * As the song plays, a familier Peg-legged Rabbit dressed as a Mayor with a familier peg-legged bat with another bat with an antenna dressed as aides are seen being chased by coyotes!
 * Familier Rabbit: "DAG NABBIT?! SOME IDEA FOR ME TO TAKE A STROLL IN THE DESERT IN THE MIDDLE OF COYOAT SEASON!?"
 * Coyote: YUMMY, YUMMY, YUMMY, YUMMY, YUMMY, YUMMY!!!
 * Lucky Jack: Seriously, if they EVER get flight and laser technology, I am gonna beat myself dead! Besides, is 'yummy' all they ever say?
 * Coyote #2: No, it's just our catchphrase.
 * Lucky Jack: Yeah? Well, who thought of it, anyway?
 * Coyote #3: Who cares? All we know is that we're gonna have the best roast rabbit cassarole ever!
 * ???: Not when I'm around, you heartless mutts!
 * Coyote #1: Who the fu--(A lasso tightens on all 3 of the coyotes, and they are spun around until they are thrown off into the distance)
 * Lucky Jack: Whoo, lucky shot, Sheriff Sandreas.
 * Sheriff Sandra: (Sandy in a cowgirl outfit, and carrying a long rope and a gun) The best one I've had all week, Mayor Jack Rabbit.
 * Fidget: "Nice one sheruff! You sent those moon howlers packing!"
 * Batty: "Oh yeah, totally!"
 * Sheruff Sandra: "Why thank you Aides Crip Wing and Tele-Bat-Vision."
 * (Discord): "Did their names have to be based on bad puns on their disabilies? I mean, seriously, and I thought the ponies of Equestia had a weird name fetish."
 * (Icky): "Exactly why your even here?"
 * (Discord): "I'm hiding here till the heat dies down. Luckly, next to dear Fluttershy, Pinkie isn't the one to hold much grudge.... In exchange for a certain cottan candy/chocolate milk based magic trick with whipped cream of mine as rent."
 * (Pinkie): "It benifits everyone involved."
 * (Discord): "Exactly why YOU and Iago are here."
 * (Icky): "Oh, while you guys were still on Pinkie's story, the show was done by now so the recording was finished, and waiting for us when we're finished with the Cakes' lonelyness problem."
 * (Twilight): "Pinkie, your honestly letting Discord stay here for cottan candy chocolate milk rain clouds? He's not even suppose to do THOSE things anymore! What if you weren't able to finish ONE and it got outside to be a minor inconvence to somepony?"
 * (Pinkie): "Oh it's not like Cottan Candy and Chocolate Milk actselly hurts anybody."
 * (Squidward): "...... Pinkie Pie? Have you ever heard of, diabetes?"
 * (Pinkie):...Yeah, I have. The thought of it makes me have nightmares, even with that 'Bittersweet' story where I die of it.
 * (Rainbow Dash): That story always seems to make me cry, too.
 * (Sandy): Well, that ain't important for the moment. Let's get back to the story.
 * Mayor Jackrabbit: Any luck catching Dirty Dan and his comrades yet?
 * Sheriff Sandra: Nope. They always seem to be one step ahead of me. The cowards. But I assure you, me and my partner will hunt 'em down in no time.
 * (Patrick): Why does that name sound familiar?
 * (Sandy): What name?
 * (Patrick): Dirty Dan.
 * (SpongeBob): You don't remember, do you? Remember when we disturbed Sandy during her hibernation and she started attacking us in her sleep?
 * (Sandy): You didn't tell me you guys did that before you stole my fur coat.
 * (SpongeBob): Blame Patrick!
 * (Patrick): Hey, taking Sandy's fur was YOUR brilliant plan!
 * (SpongeBob): Well it was your idea to go to her treedome even though we were told not to.
 * (Patrick): Yeah, well how were we supposed to know about Sandy's hibernation stuff? You didn't learn what that was until she went insane and started tearing you up with extreme activities.
 * (SpongeBob): But that wasn't as worse as being clobbered by a big fat half-asleep beast.
 * (Sandy): For your information, you two, I only looked like that because fat plays a HUGE role in keeping yourself warm other than a patch of fur. That's why mammoths were so fat and poofy.
 * (Twilight): Are we gonna just sit here arguing about hibernation, or are we gonna continue this story?
 * (Sandy): Right, sorry.
 * Crip Bat: "Well the sooner you bust those varmits, the better."
 * Bat-Vision glitched out!
 * Bat-Vision: "YARRRGH!? They be plundering our loot and shanghaing our profits that is causing the skallywags to mutanty!"
 * Crip Bat: "Bro, we're not suppose to talk like pirates, we're in the wild west!"
 * Bat-Vision glitches again!
 * Bat-Vision speaks in chinese.
 * Mayor Jackrabbit: "Dag nappit, now he's talking like a china-man!"
 * Crip Bat: Sorry. It's just that he's still adjusting to having part of his brain surgically replaced by machinery after he was shot by Pinhead Larry. His...what was the part of the brain again?
 * Sheriff Sandra: The basal ganglia. The part of the brain responsible for action selection and some behavioral functions.
 * Crip Bat: Great. Gotta remember that. Anyway, he's gonna be like this for awhile until someone makes a more advance verson of that doohicky, if that's possable in this day and age."
 * Mayor Jackrabbit: Dag nappit!? Dirty Dan and his possie have never been THIS extreme before, not since that scoundrel Quad-Limbs Hans kicked the bucket from that firy fireworks exbloution caused by a stray Injin arrow lit on fire by the local tribe ijdit!"
 * Sheriff Sandra: Definitely! After THAT, we need to bust them ASAP!
 * Bat-Vision: Let's handcuff some varmits! (BZZAT!, dubbed as Arnold Schwartzenneger) We'll be back! Dirty Dan and his posse must be found at all costs!
 * Crip Bat: Hmm...nice Arnold Schwartzenneger impression. I seemed to like that guy. What else have you got? (Twitches Bat-Vision's antennae)
 * Bat-Vision: (As Rodney Dangerfield) My wife was afraid of the dark once. But when she saw me naked, she was afraid of the light
 * Mayor Jackrabbit: "Ok, now THAT is just awkword."
 * Suddenly, the sound of a alarm bell was heard!
 * Mayor Jackrabbit: "DAG NABBIT!? IT'S THE BANK AGAIN?! Those varmits came to finish what they did last time!"
 * Crip Bat: "You mean of the last THREE DAYS!?"
 * Sandra: "Be right back guys, I gotta call that new guy to help out!"
 * Bank tellers cowerded before siluettes of three outlaws.
 * Dirty Dan, a slightly buff, and litterally dirthy Squirl, Duckbilled Benny, who in actually is a vulture with not even the slightist traces of a duck, and Pin-Head larry, a stupid, idiotic scorpian with a body shamed like a bowling ball pin, and tattoo that saids "Mom" on his left claw.
 * Dirty Dan: "All right, ya brainless piggie bankers, we came for the rest of the loot as of the last three days we done came here!"
 * A banker: "But, but, you don't understand! We're bankrupted now! We barely even have so much as a penny?!"
 * Benny: "Yeah right! I bet my non-existent duck-bill you have at least 900 bucks in there?!"
 * Banker: "The deer or the money?"
 * Pin-Head Larry: "OH OH! THEY HAVE DEER TOO?! THEMS GOOD EATING?!"
 * Dirty Dan: "....... You is a dim bulb, Larry."
 * Banker: "You guys have to believe us, this old town as exspearienced the worse ecomicomedy ever since the drought of last year when Hans was alive!"
 * Dirty Dan: "Well, perhaps we decided to honor his name by doing what made us bad to begin with! Your done just being highway men and injin killers, we're going back to the good ol' days! I even became extra dirty for the occation! Even my undies are a filthy mess!"
 * Dirty Dan reveils a very disgusting and vile pair of underwear!
 * Dirty Dan: "I haven't wipe my butt for weeks, never cleaned this thing, ALWAYS wore it every day, AND, it was once buried with me grandfather that i dug it out after day 90-100, when he started to rot. Too me forever to get them worms out."
 * Bankers exclaim in dusgust!
 * Dirty Dan: "I was wore this thing when I'm having fun with injin woman, i eat my lunch with it, AND i even used it as a fishing lore!"
 * A banker puked!
 * (Icky): "JESUS CHRIST, WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH THIS GUY?!"
 * (Sandy): "Yeah, Dirty Dan was one of the most controverseal villains of the series. He only appeared in 3 issues that were a 3 part speical called "The Dirty Wrath of Dirty Dan" where Dirty Dan was like in the story. Eventally, in later comics, he becames "Cleanly Dan" where he asentually became a recuring clean joke and become a plum wuss. I do still like the comics, but I kinda prefer the original dirty dan, cause well, that's what REALLY got me interested on just how vile he was."
 * (Discord): "Am I to assumed that controversy invited complaining parents and lawsuits?"
 * (Sandy): Yeah, he wasn't the most popular comic book character, so his comics were restricted and for adults only. My parents didn't exactly like me readin' them comics, but I liked them anyway.
 * (Alex): Whoever wrote them must have been fired for something like this.
 * (Gloria): Yeah, it's as vile as the Garbage Pail Kids.
 * (Sandy): Anyway, let's get back to the story.
 * Sheriff Sandra: (Bursts in with Puss in Boots as a cowboy with leather boots and a cowboy hat) You just crossed the border into Hurtville, Dirty Dan!
 * Dirty Dan: YOU AGAIN!
 * Puss: We're gonna be dragging you in jail by the tail wearing rubber gloves and gas masks!
 * Sheriff Sandra: Plus, we've got some business with Pinhead Larry after he shot Bat-Vision, and left him to get part of his brain replaced with machinery.
 * Pinhead Larry: Well, at least he's a lot funnier now.
 * Duckbilled Benny: (Scoffs and laughs) Good one, Larry!
 * Puss: That's not very funny, mi ememigo.
 * Dirty Dan: It doesn't matter. We're still gonna get out of here. (Sticks out his butt)
 * Sheriff Sandra: TAKE COVER, HE'S GONNA BLOW!!!
 * POOOOOOOOOOOOOOT?!
 * Stink appeared everywhere in the bank.
 * Sheriff Sandra: (Luckily she and Puss were wearing gas masks, while everyone else started barfing, grossing out, getting watery eyes, and falling to the ground) Cut out the sick act, Dirty Dan!
 * Dirty Dan: Oh, how original! Wearing gas masks! (Pinhead Larry and Duckbilled Benny are wearing gas masks as well)
 * Pinhead Larry: Seriously, Dan, you need to use that only when you're alone.
 * Dirty Dan: I thought you said it didn't bother you.
 * Duckbilled Benny: No, we said we could handle smaller farts, not nuclear farts!
 * Sheriff Sandra: Alright, enough of this. You and your kin are coming with us!
 * Dirty Dan: (All three criminals point their guns at the heroes) I don't think so! Three years of eating beans may not had stop you, but tiny speeding lead might?!"
 * Dirty Dan, Pinhead Larry and Benny started to shoot out!
 * Sheriff Sandra: DODGE! (She and Puss dodge the gunfire, and Sandra tries to finish it by lassoing them, but Pinhead Larry snips the rope) PINHEEEEEAAAAADDDD!!!
 * Pinhead Larry: It'll take more than a noose of rope to stop us. (Tries stinging Sandra, but she holds his tail away)
 * Puss: (To Duckbilled Benny) Fear me, if you dare!
 * Duckbilled Benny: Oh, I dare alright, you pitiful excuse for a feline! (Takes out a baseball bat) I dare you to die!
 * Puss:...A baseball bat? Seriously? We're not suppose to HAVE those yet?!
 * Benny: "We're not?"
 * The bat vanished into nothing.
 * Benny: "Aw, nuts! Well, at least I still have a golf club--"
 * Puss: Those aren't invented yet either. (The golf club goes away)
 * Benny: Darn it! Well, I have a hockey stick--
 * Puss: That's out. (The hockey stick disappears)
 * Benny: A nightstick--
 * Puss: Nope. (It disappears)
 * Benny: Pool cue--(It disappears) Cattle praud--(It disappears) Lightsaber--(It disappears) AW, C'MON!!!
 * Puss: Well, it looks like you're going to jail.
 * Benny: Really? (Points his gun at him) I may not have anymore melee weapons to duel you with, but at least I can finish you off with my gun! (Fires it, and Puss dodges it) STOP MOVING!!! (Fires again, and Puss dodges it again)
 * Sheriff Sandra: Yer' gonna be wearing an iron lung when I'm through with you, Pinhead! (Manages to punch Pinhead in the face)
 * Pinhead Larry: Watch the exo-skeleton, you furball!
 * Dirty Dan grabs a chear and attempts to knock out Sandra!
 * Pinhead Larry: Besides, an iron lung? That's a little bit overkill, isn't it?
 * Sheriff Sandra: Well, it's just an expression! (Dirty Dan appears behind her, but when Sandra smells his BO, she knows what Dan's doing, and manages to spin around, and punch him in the balls)
 * Dirty Dan: AAAOOOOWOWOWOWOWOOOOOWWW!!! RIGHT IN THE BELLS!!!
 * Sheriff Sandra: Seriously, Dirty Dan, do you think you can sneak up on me with all that BO? Seriously, you couldn't even sneak up on a dog with that crap!
 * Dirty Dan: "But Dogs have purrty good smelling. Even IF I didn't have my trade-mark smell, the mutt can still smell me. Dogs have super-sensitive sense of smell ya know."
 * Sandra: "Don't ya know it's a pity you know about this AND yet you choice crime still? It's a waste of knowledge in this time of wild west."
 * Dirty Dan: "Well maybe if I had better parents, we wouldn't even have this conversation!"
 * Dirty Dan and Sandra enter a fist-fight!
 * Sandra: I'm gonna skin ya' and make ya' into a pair of size-six boots, you infectious fart!
 * Dirty Dan: That'll be the day, rat-bag! (He suddenly manages to punch Sandra in the face)
 * Sandra: OOF!!! Oh, that's gonna cost you! (Steps on Dan's foot)
 * Dirty Dan: AARRRGGGHHH!!! (Sandra punches him in the stomach) OOOHHH!!! (Sandra kicks him to the ground) OOHHHH!!! I think I lost a tooth!
 * Pin-head Larry and Benny are down for the count.
 * Puss: "Well, I say this is ending better then expected."
 * Sandra: "Well, looks like your attempt to go back to the old days backfired Danny. You and yer friends should've think this through more. Your lost without Hans."
 * A laughter was heard, then suddenlty a smoke bomb appeared!
 * BOOM!
 * As the smoke screen stood, Dan, Larry, and Benny escaped, got on their horses, and fleed!
 * Puss and Sandra were able to escape the smoke.
 * Puss: "Wait it when Banditos cheat like that!"
 * Sandra: "Something tells me they ain't the only things this town has to worry about. Let's call for our steeds and follow them to their old hideout: Dead Horse Pass."
 * Puss: "Si."
 * Puss whisles, as his staillian from his spin-off movie of his exact named appeared, and got on it!
 * Puss: "Care to join?"
 * Sandra: "Thanks, but I got my own steed."
 * Sandra makes a click sound, as a silluette of a vaguely familier form appeared. It was a horse verson of Applejack. (Horses are taller and stackier then Ponies.)
 * Sandra: "Onword, Applesauce!"
 * Applesauce (Applejack as a horse): "You bet ya ma'am!" (Applesauce rides with Puss after the criminals)