Star Wars Episode 4: Shell Lodge Style

Star Wars Episode 4: Shell Lodge Style is the 3rd episode in the 2nd Season of the SpongeBob and Friends Chronicles series. In it, The Cutie Mark Crusaders are bored when they once again fail to get their cutie marks. So, to top it off, Scootaloo tells the story of Star Wars with the Shell Lodgers and Ponies as the cast. Also, while this film primarily contains jokes from the Family Guy version called Blue Harvest, this movisode will add story elements/plot points that were omitted from Blue Harvest for time.

Cast

 * Obi-Wan Kenobi- Lord Shen
 * Luke Skywalker- Spongebob
 * Princess Leia- Sandy
 * Han Solo- Rainbow Dash (To avoid lesbianism, in the later episodes, Han and Leia will become good friends)
 * Chewbacca- Pinkie (still able to talk, like the Brian variation in the family guy verson, but does growling as a joke and tesement.)
 * Darth Vader- Cynder (both Anakin and Cynder have tragic histories)
 * C-3PO- Djon
 * R2-D2- Creeper
 * Grand Moff Tarkin- Melman
 * Owen Lars- Crane
 * Beru Lars- Tirgess
 * Stormtroopers- Villain League Shocktroopers

Chapter 1- The Cutie Marked Story
The CMC Yard CMC Clubhouse
 * Scootaloo: (She, Sweetiebelle, and Applebloom were once again risking their lives with crazy shenanigans to gain their cutie marks by using a hang glider) You ready for this?
 * Applebloom: We were BORN ready!
 * Sweetiebelle: Yeah!
 * All 3: 3, 2, 1, (Take off, and start flying through the sky)
 * Applebloom: YEEHAH!
 * Sweetiebelle: Wow! Look at the view from up here.
 * Scootaloo: Yeah. Pretty soon, when I learn to fly, I'll see a view like this.
 * Sweetiebelle: LOOK OUT!!! (All 3 crash the hang glider into a tree, and fall to the ground. But they are okay)
 * Scootaloo: HAH! That was AWESOME!! (The Crusaders once again fail to gain their cutie marks) Aww!
 * Applebloom: Darn!
 * Sweetiebelle: Shoot!
 * Scootaloo: Man, this is the 150th time we've failed to gain our cutie marks. I'm beginning to think we're not trying hard enough.
 * Sweetiebelle: I'm pretty sure we were trying as hard as we can, Scoo.
 * Applebloom: Well, let's just remember what we learned in school. Cutie marks need to be earned by discovery of special talents.
 * Scootaloo: Yeah, but that's what we've been doing since we first met.
 * Sweetiebelle: And we've never found anything that we've been good at.
 * Applebloom: Maybe we should head back to the clubhouse. I'm gettin' tired.
 * Scootaloo: Me, too.
 * Sweetiebelle: Me, three.
 * Applebloom: So, what should we do now?
 * Sweetiebelle: I don't know. Every attempt we pulled off was futile for us. I don't think we'll ever gain our cutie marks for a while.
 * Scootaloo: Hey, hey, hey, that's not what Babs would say. Tell you what, how about I tell a story for the time being.
 * Applebloom: That sounds like a great idea, Scoo.
 * Scootaloo: Alright then. (Dubbed as Peter Griffin) This is a story of love and loss, fathers and sons, and the foresight to retain international mercandising rights. This is the story of Star Wars.
 * Sweetiebelle: Star Wars?
 * Applebloom: Oooooh, I love them movies. Me and Applejack use to watch them when we was alone at the barn.
 * Sweetiebelle: Great suggestion, Scoo.
 * Scootaloo: Thanks. Well, I guess we should get started. Here's Part 4...

Chapter 2- The Story Begins
A long time ago, but somehow in the future...

Intro (Star Wars Theme Song)

"It is a period of civil war. Rebel spaceships, striking from a hidden base, have won their first victory against the evil Galactic Empire. There will be lots of crazy stuff happening in this parody like the Family Guy parody. Darth Vader will be a female, The main heroes will mostly consist of females, and the stormtroopers are just Shocktroopers. It will actually be explained in later episodes why Darth Vader is a female in this parody, and those who watch this and are female, PLEEEAAAASSE don't think of this as a girly episode just because females are the dominant gender in this episode. It will still have plently of guys! Trust me on this! Elsewhere in the Tantive IV The hallway from before. Escape Pod Room
 * In a far reaches of space, at first it seems peaceful... but then....
 * (The Tantive IV ship is being chased by an Imperial Star Destroyer while they begin blasting at each other, then the Star Destroyer gets a clean hit)
 * C-3PO (Djon): (Dubbed as Quagmire 3PO) Hear that? Sounds like we're being bordered from the rear. And not the kind of 'Hey, take a deep breath, less experiment' type of bordered from the rear.
 * R2-D2 (Creeper): Beep boop beep. It's a good thing I can't feel pain cuz' I'm a robot. (Chuckles)
 * C-3PO: Oh, I'm pretty sure we're not susceptible to electricity, R2. Just you wait, someday, we'll both be captured by some freaky creatures with ion guns and hoods.
 * R2-D2: Like that will happen. (Tantive IV is captured by the Star Destroyer)
 * Rebel soldiers gathered up and blocked the enterence they think is most likely to be blown up by the storm troopers.
 * R2-D2: "Oh bloody hell! I think now's a good time to vanish, a death battle's about to begin!"
 * C-3PO: "Oh. you mean in the "Screwattack" channel?"
 * Voices: "SCREWATTACK!"
 * C and R2 weew confused.
 * R2-D2: "The hell was that?"
 * C-3PO: That's not it. I meant WE'VE GOT COMPANY! (Door is blown down and Stormtrooper-like Shocktroopers that blast their blasters at the Rebels, and a firefight begins)
 * R2-D2: MOTHER!!! (Both droids retreat through slide door)
 * Rebels fight hard, but eventally, their asses get handed to them.
 * Rebel: (Gets blasted down) DAMN! I was 2 days from retirement!
 * Shocktrooper: YEAH! (Smells air) Ahh, I LOVE the rotten smell of blaster plasma in the morning.
 * Shocktrooper 2: How do you know it's morning? We're not even on a planet.
 * Shocktrooper: Shut up, Shockass! I was being metaphorical.
 * C-3PO: R2? Where are you? (Shrugs) I hate it when I lose him. He must've gotten distracted by that Droid Bar again...(Then he finds R2 with Princess Leia)
 * Princess Leia (Sandy): (On Holographic recording) Help me, Obi-Wan Kenobi. You're my only hope! (Dubbed as Lois Leia) Alright, now what do I click?
 * R2-D2: (Dubbed as Cleveland R2) Click "Preferences". (She does that)
 * Leia: Okay, I clicked "Preferences".
 * R2-D2: Now go to "Default Media Browser". (She does that)
 * Leia :Okay. There's a little hourglass and it's-it's not letting me do anything. It-it says "Buffering", what is that?
 * R2-D2: Just give it a minute.
 * Leia: Hey, all I'm trying to do is make an MPEG.
 * R2-D2: All I'm trying to do is tell you to wait a minute.
 * Leia: Okay, relax.
 * R2-D2: Now click, "Import Video File".
 * Leia: All right. (She does that) It's telling me I have to download RealPlayer 7.
 * R2-D2: You know what? I'll just bring it to him myself.
 * Leia: Yeah, I think that's for the best.
 * C-3PO: R2!! There you are! Where have you been?!?
 * R2-D2: I got lost, alright?!? You don't have to be a dick about it.
 * C-3PO: I'm being a dick about it FOR OUR SAFETY!!!
 * Leia: Alright, alright, calm down, you savages! Just find Obi-Wan quick!
 * Shocktrooper: There she is! (R2-D2 and C-3PO retreat while Leia is knocked out by a blaster)
 * Leia: OOF! (Dizzy) Check please? (Faints)
 * Shocktrooper: "Holy crap!  She's not dead, is she? Cause she's, kinda impourent to the story."
 * Shocktrooper 2: These are STUN blasters, you idiot! If they weren't, we'd be kicked out of the story by the producer.
 * Shocktrooper: Okay, okay, God! Let's just bring her to Lord Cynder.
 * Shocktrooper 2: "Yeah good idea- wait what? I thought it was Vader."
 * the other shocktrooper gave an awkword pose.
 * Shocktrooper: 'You didn't get the memo, did you?"
 * MSM's voice: Look, I know Cynder's Darth Vader, but that doesn't mean she should have the same name. I thought Lord Cynder would sound cooler. But for your sake, you can call her 'Vynder'. Does that sound good enough?
 * Shocktrooper 2: Sure, I guess.
 * MSM's voice: Excellent. Now resume your duties before Lord Vynder gets MAD!
 * Shocktroopers form a single line.
 * Lord Vynder (Dark Cynder): (Arrives through the entrance, clearing the dead Rebels from her walkway with the Force) I HATE messes. (The Shocktroopers bring Leia to her) Well, well, well. If it isn't the squirrel chick of Alderaan, Princess Leia. I DEMAND you to tell me what you've done with the stolen Death Star plans.
 * Leia: No matter what, you ain't gettin a word from me, Lord Vynder.
 * Lord Vynder: 'Lord Vynder'? I'm sorry, did you get the memo? (MSM chokes Vynder with the Force) AHHKK!! Okay, okay, I get it! God! (Clears throat) Take her away. (Shocktroopers take Leia away)

An imperial star destroyer.
 * C-3PO: Quick, in here! (3PO and R2 hop into an escape pod, and blast off)
 * Tai Lung and Makunga are seen as Imperial lutenents.
 * Tai Lung: "There appears to be an escape pod. Should we blow it up?"
 * Makunga: No, there's no lifeforms aboard.
 * Tai Lung: What're we paying by the laser now?
 * Makunga: You don't do the budget, Tai, I do!
 * Tai Lung: "Ok, ok, sheesh! I just hope that pod doesn't contain something that'll end up become the downfall of the empire in some contrived way."
 * Makunga: Then what're you waiting for? Go send reinforcements to investigate.
 * Tai Lung: "Too late! That pod is out of reach now."
 * Makinga: "Well, maybe it was a fluke, a malfuntion."
 * Tai Lung: "Just to be on the safe side, let's NOT inform the boss of this AT all! She would kick our asses for this!"
 * Makunga: We're still not out of our league. My calculations show it's headed for Tatooine. We must find it's crash site and investigate.
 * Tai Lung: Sure, but remember, Lord Vynder must not know about this.

Chapter 3- Stranded on Tatooine
The Tatooine desert. miles later in the sand dunes. creepy cavern areas. Death Star, the Most Powerful Weapon in the Galaxy Tatooine Escape Pod Crash Site the walking krusty crab thing. Moisture Farm
 * the pod is seen.
 * R2-D2: "Are we in a planet yet? You haven't opened the bloody door in hours?!"
 * C-3PO: Of course we're on a planet! I'm just having a hard time opening it, that's all. It's like sand is blocking our--(Door opens, and sand pours into the pod) MMPPPHH!!
 * R2-D2: (Both he and 3PO pop out of the sand, and to the surface) I got sand in places I didn't even know I had.
 * C-3PO: Well, at least we're out. Alright, we're on Tatooine.
 * R2-D2: So, where do you think Obi-Wan is?
 * C-3PO: "Sadly, R2, accurding to the star wars mythos, my memory of Mr. Obi-Wan's location was erased for his protaction."
 * R2-D2: "Well, that means your bloody useless."
 * C-3PO: "Well ok, Mister Smarty pants, what's your plan?!"
 * R2-D2: I say we split up.
 * C-3PO: I don't think that's a good idea What if Sand People attack us? What about Jawas?
 * R2-D2: Don't be a whimp, whimp!
 * C-3PO; You know what, that's a great idea, Keg-chest. Let's split up so we can be torn apart by savage creatures and sold for scrap.
 * R2-D2: You'll be first.
 * C-3PO: No, YOU'LL be first!
 * R2-D2: We'll see about that, metal-pants. (Both split up)
 * C-3PO: "Oh who needs Mr. Meany pants! i can handle myself! (sees something in the horisen) Oh! Lookie! I am already doing super well! Transport! It looks like a walking verson of the krusty krab restaurent though. But who cares!"
 * C-3PO waves to get attention!
 * R2-D2: "I showed that twat golden pants idiot! I am in the most isloated part of the area. Surely it means Obi-Wan would hide here. What could possibly go wrong?" (Suddenly gets shot by Jawas that look like Mr. Krabs in ropes) WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWW!!! (Shuts down, and the Jawas take him away)
 * Jewas: "Money, Money, Money, Money (repeats the word money for awhile.)."
 * Imperial Soldier (Marty): Any attack on this station would be a useless gesture, no matter how much data they've obtained. This station is now the ultimate crack-a-lackey power in the universe.
 * Lord Vynder: Excellent, so no weaknesses at all?
 * Imperial Soldier: Nope. It's 99.99% unstoppable.
 * Lord Vynder: Well, what's the 0.01%?
 * Imperial Soldier: Well, there's this little hole, and if you shoot in it, the place explodes like the 4th of July.
 * Lord Vynder: Whoa whoa, that sounds like a pretty big design flaw.
 * Imperial soldier: "Oh don't worry miss V, it's too pathicly small, and well hidden."
 * Lord Vynder: "Yeah, but, they have our plans, and Leia won't reveil what she did with them, the damn squirl girl, and if we don't find out where she hid them, the rebels are gonna know our weakness!"
 * Imperial soldier: "Well, maybe to just be on the safe side, let's put like, a wooden plank over it, and maybe-"
 * Lord Vynder: "Your talking about using wood against rebel ships with fucking lazers that'll just burn it off?"
 * Imperial Soldier: Well, we've run out of metal, my lord. Wood is the only choice we go, so--(Vynder chokes him with the Force)
 * Lord Vynder:...I find your lack of faith disturbing... as well as how cheap you are about something simple as proper coverage.
 * Grand Moff Tarkin (Melman): Enough of this! Vynder, release him!
 * Lord Vynder: As you wish. (Releases Imperial Soldier, and he gasps with air)
 * Grand Moff: "I mean honestly, what's is it with you and force-choking people! I mean, 19 of our guys are hospitalised, and you killed 2 of our finest generals!"
 * Lord Vynder: "Let's remember i have bad anger issues. So, hopefully, this won't matter, the sooner we find out Leia's hiding place for our surely fatal flaw, the better."
 * Shocktrooper: (Shocktroopers investigate crash site) Someone WAS in the pod. The tracks go off in this direction.
 * Shocktrooper 2: Look sir, droids!
 * Shocktrooper 3: HEY, A PENNY!!!
 * Shocktrooper: "Oh real mature guys! Seriously, focus! Whoever was in that pod, propbuly has something impourent that in the wrong hand in long terms could be used against us, so focus!"
 * Shocktrooper 2: Besides, a penny? It's not worth a lot of money, you know.
 * Shocktrooper: Let's just be on the lookout for some droids.
 * inside.
 * R2-D2 came through.
 * R2-D2: "Aw bloody hell. Where am i?"
 * Jawa (Mr. Krabs): Money money money money money.
 * R2-D2: YIPES! A JAWA!!! Get away from me, you crusty creep!
 * C-3PO: I KNEW this was a bad idea from the start, R2. I never should've listened to you. Now, we're playing pattycake with a bunch of cheapskates with no faces.
 * Jawa: WHAT?!? (Takes hood off) I'll have you know, I'm not cheap. This is just how I make a living.
 * C-3PO: Why'd you put your hood down? I don't think Jawas are supposed to do that.
 * Jawa: Why? Is it because of my age? I ain't old! I AIN'T OLD!!!!
 * R2-D2: Alright, alright, you've gotten your point across.
 * Jawa: THANK YOU! (Puts hood back up) Money money money money money...(Walks away)
 * C-3PO: Yeah, Jawas can sometimes be melodramatic.
 * R2-D2: Uh, 3PO? We're stopping at some kind of moisture farm.
 * C-3PO: Well, it's about time. Anything's better than this stupid Crustycrawler.
 * Jawas: Money money money money money money money
 * Owen Lars (Crane): Alright, what's for sale, crabbies?
 * Jawa: "Money, Money Money Money, money!"
 * a series of robots, and R2-D2 and C-3PO are reveiled.
 * R2-D2: "Well i'm glad we're not being sold a whiny protaginest."
 * Owen: Hmm...those 2 droids look perfect. The astromech droid and the golden protocol droid.
 * C-3PO: YES! So long, cheapskate midgets! (Laughs) Hello, there, bird. I am C-3PO, cartoon-cyborg relations, and this is my counterpart, R2-D2.
 * R2-D2: Counterpart? We don't even look alike!
 * Owen: Hmm...you seem to have great value. Do you speak Bachy?
 * C-3PO: Of course I do, sir. It's like a second language to me. I'm fluent in over 6 million forms of communication. Many of which include Japanese.
 * Owen: Yeah, whatever. (Suddenly the camera eases onto a sponge)
 * ???: LUKE? LUKE? LUKE?!?!?
 * Luke (SpongeBob): WHAT IS IT, AUNT BERU?!?
 * Beru Lars (Tigress): Tell Uncle Owen not to tell you that your mother is Darth Vynder.
 * Luke: That doesn't even make any sense.
 * Beru: It's not supposed to.
 * Luke: Aw, c'mon, Aunt Beru! When are you gonna let me join the Rebellion like all my friends?
 * Beru: Oh, stop whining and come have some blue milk, Luke.
 * Luke: One of these days, I'm just gonna run off and join the Rebellion whether you like it or not!
 * Beru: Over my disintegrated flesh!
 * Luke: "Just hope no near by Stormtrooper heard that! Who knows?! It might just happened!"
 * Luke stomps out in anger.