Denmark Secrets Revealed

Hans comes back after years of being a double agent, revealing that he needs the Penguins help because an investigator from the Copenhagen Zoo, and the one who got him banned from his home, has managed to, shock of all shock, cleared Skipper's name as Denmark Public Enemy #1, explaining that the head of the security of the Danish Embassy during their raid in Skipper Makes Perfect caught much of the attack on tape and thus a new criminal file was made with the proof, and thus Hans is being constantly hunted down, and thus he had to escape even the leage fortress when even they couldn't protect them from the investigator, to get help. This investigator, a flight-capable puffin and Hans' former girlfriend and zoo mate, Hanne, and a great dane partner named Copenhagen, who dispite looking male-like is actselly a mute female, has managed to place a tracking device on Hans and is now hunting him to the Temple, having the UUPD force the Lodgers to surrender Hans under threat of prosecution. With Hans being forced to be surrendered, Hanne explains that Hans was best not to have been a double agent because he was a criminal and a jerk who has a constant history of betraying her as she did the same to him, yet they nevertheless forgave each other until she had enough when he framed her idol, Skipper, for the incident in Denmark, which is finally explained by Hanne despite Skipper demanding she do no such thing, which she overrules because of helping harbor an wanted criminal and thus places him on a restraining order that forbids him from seeing Hans, and has appointed him a probation officer in he form of a denmarkian field mouse who's stronger then he looks, named Swess O'Cheese. It's revealed from her that Hans was in charge of watching over Skipper's mission as he secures a file of a secret formula for the perfect open-face sandwich that was supposed to go to the biggest restaurant in Copenhagen the city, as it was being sought by an American criminal mastermind, a jack russel named Jackson the Mutt, hoping for it to be a makeup for a terrible incident. However, this incident was an example of the problem as Hans, jealous of Skipper's notorieties involving him and Hanne by making him look bad in front of her and jeopardizing their relationship to hurtful levels, the previous incident costing him his ability to fly through court martial-sentence of having clipped wings, manages to lure him into a location that makes him look like a criminal: the residence of Jackson and his human owner who insidentaly is a reknown american crime boss, as it tricked all the Danes into believing he worked for the mastermind as a scandal, as the formula ended up in Jackson's paws because Skipper made a mistake of placing an American flag on the sandwich, thinking it was a Danish flag as Hans replaced it following their fight, thus causing it to be American property, and thus leaving Skipper to retreat to America as even the Zoo refused to welcome him in and threatened to turn him in. Skipper constantly refused to elaborate on the details because he was afraid that everyone in America would accuse him of a punishable offense of bringing the sandwich formula to America, and thus transferring undeclared commerce across country lines since, at the time, his residence in the Copenhagen Zoo made him a technical citizen, and thus take away his American citizenship and deport him back to Denmark, which he clearly established he tried to avoid going. Hanne later explained that she investigated further upon not only checking on his progress, but also for the fact that he was a lead in the footage of the crime scene, thus despite him constantly trying to get her off-track, she discovered that Hans was responsible, and thus had him ousted from Denmark, which would lead him to America and thus the first encounter in Huffin and Puffin. Now, he asks Skipper to forgive her for this as this was all to do him a favor for her harsh treatment on him following the framing incident. But since the Lodgers consider Hans family because of all the double-agent things he did for them, they decide that they need to acquit Hans once and for all, thus entering Harvey Wadder. Unfortunately, the Villain League is interested in him once again because, since they discovered Hans and Savio's double-agent status, has been trying to get them back, and punish them through a horrid corruption process that instantly causes the corrupted soul to have a permanent and irreversible evil heart. Sending in Doctor Blowhole to retrieve him, he starts off by tricking Skipper into violating his restraining order and getting him out of the picture, and then sabotaging the trial so that Hans ends up in his hands again. Thus, the Lodgers will have to do what they can to repair fractured relationships. And on top of that, because of the events being exposed, Jackson no longer gets to enjoy his ill-gotten business as his owner who became a sandwich maker as a side-job for his illegit crimes has gotten arrested for stealing Denmark's sandwich idea and violating international respect with a contrary of europe, while Jackson is made wanted by secret animal enforcers because of being the true mastermind behind his human owner, and thus wants to destroy both Skipper and Hans because of assusiation, and Hanne and her partners for exposing him! Now Jackson would've been a serious threat, had not for being his private bodyguard of ninja irish wolf hounds and his sameral right-paw man, a Japanese spider crab named Hao the Disgraced. Yeah, this is gonna be a LOOOOONG day for the Lougers.

Material

Songs/Music/Videos

(TBA...)

Scenes

Hanne Returns

Hans' Habitat, Hoboken Zoo

• Skipper: (Hanne and the penguins were sitting as Ma the Possum gave them Danishes)... I know it's been a long time, Hanne, so... If you'll pardon my outrageous angry words... (As the words rumbled the entire area) HOW COULD YOU LET ONE OF OUR BEST DOUBLE AGENTS BE TAKEN FROM US?!?
• Hanne: I thought you would be happy I cleared your name since the evidence of your involvement was leaked and Omega Zulu became a bust, but not for long. I did what I had to do.
• Skipper: Don't get me wrong, it was a bold effort, but... We had him as a double agent in the Villain League for a long time since he helped us save this zoo from a crazy neat-freak zookeeper lady.
• Hanne: Be that as it may, he was still guilty of other crimes. You know the law doesn't spare easily. Who do you think drove him out of Denmark?
• Skipper:... THAT WAS YOU?!
• Hanne: Yes. I couldn't stand him doing all this to you because he lost his flight.
• Private:... Since when could puffins fly? (Everyone looked at him weird)... What?
• Skipper: Private... We're about to drop some National Geographic wisdom upon your ass, Kowalski?
• Kowalski: Already on it. (He takes out his phone)
• Skipper: (He slaps Private) SINCE FOREVER!!! PUFFINS COULD ALWAYS FLY!!! YOU THOUGHT PUFFINS COULDN'T FLY BECAUSE HANS COULDN'T?!? BIRDS IN ZOOS GET THEIR WINGS CLIPPED ALL THE TIME!!!
• Kowalski: I MEAN BY LINNAEUS' LOST LUNCH, DO YOU WATCH ANYTHING BESIDES LUNACORNS?! LOOK AT THIS!! (He shows him this video on his phone)

Nesting Puffin National Geographic

• Skipper:... You feel stupid about yourself, Private?
• Hanne: Skipper, min ven, no need to take your disappointment on him. It hurt me to do that to someone I loved, but it would've hurt me even more if I let him get away with it.
• Private: Look, uh, Miss Hanne, uh, what exactly happened in Denmark? Skipper never told us about it, and, our TV show is not exactly, around anymore, so, maybe now's a good time to get to explaining that?
• Hanne:... Helt seriøst?
• Kowalski: Never said a word. When we got the files on Skipper, he gave Private a short time to read it, and had Rico shred it the last second as Private couldn't read Danish.
• Hanne: Oh, you son of a hen! Skipper, did you commit to the sin of secretcy from even your trusted allies?
• Skipper: "Hanne, it was a strictly needless to know basis! I did so to protect their fragle minds of the horror of this greek tragity of a dishastor!"
• Hanne: "..... It's just a case of a stolen sandwich recipe, Skipper!"
• Silence......
• Private: ".... Sandwiches?"
• Rico: "(Garbles Sandwiches)?"
• Kolwalski: "..... You got kicked out of Denmark..... OVER A SANDWICH?! I THOUGHT IT WAS SOMETHING MORE SERIOUS, LIKE, A DANISH FISH INDUSTRY TERROREST ATTACK OR THE THEFT OF A RARE GOLDEN TUNA EGG?! I WOULD'VE EVEN ACCEPTED A DANISH SEA WORLD CELEBERTY HAVING THEIR FEELINGS HURT IN ALOU TO WHAT HAPPENED TO SPONGEBOB?! BUT, A SANDWICH?!"
• Skipper: Not just ANY sandwich. The perfect open-faced sandwich..... Imagine a sandwich that is intentionally not placed togather. The Minister of Open-Faced Sandwiches is equally as cold as all the other souls out there.... No offense.
• Hanne: None taken. Well since you neglected to inform them, I shall.
• Skipper: That's not necessary-
• Hanne: Don't make me call Copenhagen. You've been dishonest to the only family you ever had for too long. Time to suck in your all-knowing gut and own up.
• Skipper: (Shrugs) I guess that's a take back of the 'no offense' remark.
• Hanne: I didn't need it anyhow. You three better make yourselves comfortable because this story might get... Dark in some parts.
• Private: "A story about a sandwich? Getting dark?"
• Hanne:..... Okay, I admit that sounded alittle silly, but trust me, it is more serious then it sounds. It all started a few weeks after Skipper's training in the Copenhagen Zoo.

Flashback

• (Hanne): I was his instructor there, and Hans... Was my boyfriend. I had been a military commander for a very long time. I had not known my parents, and I fended for myself in the harshest the near-Arctic had to throw at me, just like you. I went to the Copenhagen Zoo to set up my base of operations. Skipper was transferred to me for a special mission regarding an American scandal. But... Hans had him under suspicion. Hans was secretly brainwashing me with the local zoo animal scientist's stolen technology to keep me from forever dumping him for my... Military instincts. Every time I tried, he erased that memory. So we remained together. Skipper caught him in the act, and had him punished by making it look like he was constantly able to escape his habitat. Thus... He had his wings clipped by the zookeepers and he could never fly again.
• (Private): (Gasps)! Seriously, Skipper?! How could you do that?!
• (Skipper): It had to be done. That was what he was best at and I made sure he could never hurt anyone like that again.
• (Hanne): So when I finally broke up with him, well, you can imagine why he had Skipper ousted from Denmark. It was the day to stop the Sandwich scandal, and I sent Hans to watch over Skipper. I figured they could come to a simple conclusion about the mess and show no hard feelings. Skipper's mission was simple: retrieve the stolen formula for the perfect open-faced sandwich and claim it as Danish property by putting a Danish flag pin into it. I even discovered that as a regular sandwich, it could've been better, so I asked him to try that out. But Hans had... More sinister intentions. When they reached the American warehouse... Hans' true colors shined.
• Skipper: You know, Hans? You've really changed. (As Hans reached for the alarm button) I mean, I hope there's no hard feelings for taking your flight so you can't hurt anyone else, but I'm sure you can understand now that we're finally going to turn the tables on Jackson.
• Hans: Oh, I understand, Skipper. (Skipper turned to see in shock what he was doing) I understand that you are the worst thing to happen to me and Hanne's zoo! (He pressed the button and the alarm blared alerting everyone)
• Skipper: HANS!!! WHYY?!?
• Hans: Oh like you seriously needed to asked, Skips! Because you took my flight and my veninde! Now I will drive you out of Denmark and be rid of you forever!
• Skipper: YOU DOUBLE-CROSSING DOUBLE-CROSSER!!! YOU WOULD COST DENMARK THEIR PERFECT SANDWICH JUST TO GET EVEN WITH ME?!..... Actselly, contextually, it kinda sounds silly.
• Hans: ".... Yeah, you're right, let's agree to leave it shrouded in mystery and ambiguity so people outside of Denmark can take us seriously."
• Skipper: "Oh at least we agree on something....... But still?! Let's finish this! (Pulls out a gun) En guarde, you treacherous traitorous søpapegøje! TOUCHE!! (Hans threw a fish that knocked the gun away and into a hole in the wall)
• Hans: Oh aren't we cliché? Buuut, since I'm feeling merciful, let's settle things a little more... Traditionally. (Pulls out two fish spinning them and threw one to Skipper) En guarde yourself, you life-ruining paranoid pingvin! (The two fish fight)
• Skipper: "HOW COULD YOU LET DENMARK DOWN LIKE THIS, HANS?!"
• Hans: "I meant NOT to betray the Danes, Skipper! This is PURELY and STRICTLY revenge for TAKING AWAY MY HANNE FROM ME?! You also lose points for crippling me of flight."
• Skipper: "YOU WERE BRAINWASHING HER TO NOT LEAVE YOU?!"
• Hans: "IT'S COMPLICATED, ALRIGHT?! WE KEPT HAVING FALLING OUTS, AND SHE WAS STARTING TO STOP BEING INTERESTED IN ME?! I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO, MAN?! I WAS ONLY DOING IT UNTIL I CAN FIGURE OUT A WAY TO RE-WOO HER AGAIN?! THE BRAINWASH THING WAS ONLY GONNA BE UNTIL THIS RUT IS FIXED?!"
• Skipper: "Ya know, YA COULD'VE JUST AS EASILY BROUGHT HER A VERY NICE GIFT OR TAKE HER OUT TO DINNER?!"
• Hans: "I-...... Huh...... Actselly, either one of those things could've helped- (Gets smacked by Skipper's fish) D'OW-A-HO! OH YOU ARE JUST A VERY NAUGHTY AND INDIGENT PENGUIN?!"
• ???: "(Over Intercom) (Brooklin Accent) Testing, Testing, 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-9-10! Hey uh, birdies, is this a private fight, or is it a free-for-all that my friend from the east can join?"
• Hans: "Uhhhhhh..... Depends...... Which part of the east?"
• ???: "Here's a sound clip for a hint."

Yooooooooooo

• Skipper: "(Gasps!)...... Japan....."
• A very tall crap-like figure landed where Skipper and Hans are and loomed over them while armed with a samarai sword.
• The two looked to see a Japanise Spider Crab.
• Hans: "Oh no! NOT HAO THE DISGRACED?!"
• Skipper: "How-wow-what now?"
• (Kowalski): (Shivers) The Japanese Spider Crab Macrocheira kaempferi. The crustacean to stand above all crustaceans.
• (Skipper): Not to mention delectable when smothered in butter and the best sauces the Land of the Rising Sun has in the condiment isle.
• (Hanne): Not just ANY Japanese Spider Crab. He was...
• Hans: Hayato 'Hao' G. Mizushima the Disgraced. Betrayer of the Mizushara Crab Samurai Clan and imprisoned in the Philippines Manila Ocean Park for his crimes.
• Hao: Well now I serve Jackson! Let's say... I HAVE A HISTORY WITH THIS PAFIN AND HIS RABUBĀDO!! They nearly ruined me had it not been for dumb luck!!
• (Hanne): That was one of MY perfect days and the one of which gave me hope and true purpose. Hans and I helped a Red-crowned crane samurai friend be free of his slavery as a messenger bird conducted when he enslaved the entire Ocean Park. Never expected him to chase me all the way to Denmark.
• Hans: Hey, uh, Hao! Long time no see!
• Hao: Save it, Hans! Where is your lvoer?
• Hans:... We're not together anymore, and I want to-
• Hao: That is enough for me to know! If Hanne is not here, then I shall do what I was sent here to do. Protect the open-faced sandwich formula so Jackson's master can be a celebrated as the restaurant owner he was robbed to be. Not much in it for me until now! (He grabs the briefcase)
• Skipper/Hans: NO! THAT'S MY JOB/REVENGE! OH, SHUT UP! (They lunged at him with the fish as Hao used human kitchen knives to slice them)
• Hans:...... Maybe we should've kept the gun around.
• Skipper: YOU THINK?!?
• Hao started to attack Hans and Skipper as the duo were forced to retreat!
• Skipper: "THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT, HANS?!"
• Hans: "WELL I DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT HAO WORKING WITH JACKSON?!"
• Skipper: "I MEANT THAT YOU COSTED THE DANES THE SANDWITCH?!"
• Hans: Like you cost me MY FLIGHT AND GIRL?!
• Skipper: YOU WERE DOING WRONGFUL THINGS TO HER BECAUSE YOU WERE SUCH A MINNOW!!
• Hans: (As Hao listened in aggravation) I WAS A MINNOW AND SHE WAS A SHARK!!! IT WAS SO HARD TO KEEP HER HAPPY AND KEEP ME HAPPY!! I COULDN'T LIVE WITHOUT HER!!
• Skipper: BUT YOU CAN LIVE WITH LYING TO HER?! MANIPULATING HER?!
• Hans: I DIDN'T LIKE TO DO THAT, AND I DIDN'T WANT TO DO IT FOREVER!!! I JUST WANTED TO FIND A COMPROMISE AND YOU RUINED EVERYTHING AND CRIPPLED ME!! MY GIRLFRIEND WAS ENOUGH, BUT TAKING AWAY MY FLIGHT?!? A MONSTER LIKE YOU SHOULDN'T BE HERE!!
• Skipper: I DIDN'T WANT YOU TO HARM OTHERS LIKE THAT AGAIN!!
• Hans: WELL IT'S STILL YOUR FAULT FOR ALL THIS!!
• Hao: Aahhgh, this job isn't worth putting up with a quarrel of torture like this!! You want the damn sandwich, it's yours! But we will meet again! (He retreats)
• Skipper:... (He beat Hans to the briefcase to find the open-faced sandwich as Hans threw many open-faced sandwiches at him as they continued to fight) Is this supposed to be a fish fight or a food fight? I'm confused!
• Hans: It's actually both when you think about it- (Skipper lunged into the air and smacked Hans senseless as he fell dazed)...
• Skipper: Alright! Now to pin this sucker! (Authorities then arrived after they beat down the guards and approached Skipper while Hans retreated as he placed two open-faced sandwiches together and dodged gunfire to knock out all of them until the head from Skipper Makes Perfect came in as Skipper stopped, thought quick, and placed what he thought was the Danish flag pin when it was really an American flag pin)
• Head Officer:... HOW COULD YOU HAND SUCH A POTENTIALLY-SCRUMPTIOUS FOOD TO AMERICA?! (Skipper was confused until he saw what he did as an aoogah sound played as he saw that Hans switched out the pins and left)
• Skipper: NOOOOOO!!!
• Head Officer: ARREST THAT SCANDALOUS PET BIRD IMMEDIATELY!!! (Skipper struggled to escape with his life as everything was thrown at him)
• Skipper: HANS... I'LL GET YOU FOR THIS!!!...
• (Hanne): Hans switched the Danish pin for an American pin and Skipper accidentally declared it American property. Many good sandwiches were lost that day. I... I had no choice but to relocate him back to New York to save him.... But... That wasn't where the story ended. I found evidence showing that Hans had a flipper in the scandal. I found the Danish pin in his bunk, and I realized it was him. So I did what I had to do. I informed the Danes about the whole thing, not human of course, but local Dane Animal Commanders, and had him ostracized from Denmark, for good.
• (Skipper): So that's when he first came to New York to try and take our HQ in the zoo.
• (Hanne): Yes. He betrayed everyone for his crimes, as I have since been trying to clear your name. Then one day I heard you were in town. Last few times you tried to get in, you almost got captured. You had to have some kind of upper edge. So I followed you to the Consulate Building. I was like...
• Hanne: IS HE INSANE?!? HE'S SIGNING A DEATH WARRANT OUT THERE!!!
• (Hanne): I flew as fast as my wings could carry me to the building... Only to find that you were nailing it! I hacked everything you were using to see what you were doing... And your 'perfect day' made you unstoppable just like when I stopped Hao. You pulled through without a scratch and lived to tell about it. But... Sorry to ruin that perfect day of yours, but you weren't free for long. Turns out the Head of Danish Security gained footage of you trying to destroy those files and had enough proof to make a new one. But it only happened the day after the raid, so your perfect day was not ruined.

Present

• Hanne: So, I felt it was up to me to step up my game because you'd likely be walking into a trap by the time you returned. I had to think like you and get all the evidence I could.
• Skipper: And did it pay off? How'd you finally do it?
• Kolwalski: "And why did it took you so long?"
• Hanne: Sherlock Holmes never said an investigation was a cakewalk, smarty! (Skipper scoffed) Even on a perfect day, investigations are slow. It was no different for me... Buuuuut it likely could've had I not done what I SHOULD'VE done from the beginning. Break into Jackson's master's restaurant warehouse and find any footage of the mission.
• Private: Question.... Who's Jackson?
• Hanne: I'll get to that later. Anyway, his master's restaurant is right here in Hoboken.
• Rico: WHAAAAAAAT?!
• Skipper: HE'S HERE?!?
• Hanne: Copenhagen is on sniffing down Jackson's scent as we speak so we can take care of him. Back to the story, I went there last month.

Flashback

• Hanne: (She flew straight through the glass of the Consulate Building right at the Head Guard's office and onto his table in front of him)
• Head Guard: HVAD HELVEDE?!? (Hanne showed him the tape labeled 'Skipper is Innocent', sternly pointing at the tape and the TV and flew away)
• (Private): You essentially blew your cover?
• (Skipper): That guy knows about me to label me Public Enemy #1 and such info is equally on a need-to-know basis, and that's the question you answer?
• (Hanne): So, he played the tape. After such...
• The American Smuggler was seen on a talk show.
• Talk Show Host: "So, what are your plans for the future of Honest Slices, America's faverite Restaurent?"
• The Amarican Smuggler: "(Brooklin Accent) I'm thinking, opening a Sandwich Theme park where children can get to make their own sandwiches and ride sandwich rides. Then follow that up with making a Children's program about the adventures of Sammy Sammich, a sentient Sandwich who fights the evil, Evil Cucumberlord, then feed all the starving kiddies of africa with the patented, Perfect Open-Faced Sandwiches, and have yact parties at the end of each week where my best custemors will be invited! I'm also holding a "Make the new best Sandwich" Compition where the winner will get to be part of the Honest Slives family..... And a big-tush cash prize!"
• Talk Show Host: "Quite an ambitious man. So, how did you came to even make he Pefect Open-Faced Sandwich?"
• The Amarican Smuggler: "Well, it came to me in a dream, in where I was flouting out in space and I saw.... An open-faced Sandwich, that can change the world. So, I bought it from a dying friend in Denmark, and lived his legacy for him as he asked. He asked to sell the goody at your place... DON'T LET THE FLAME DIE OUT!!! (He cried then got cheerful) So expect this theme park open to the public soon! It'll blow your mind like the sandwich did me, right, Jackson? (Jackson barked)
• Talk Show Host: Give it up for-
• ???: HALT!! (The Head Guard and more agents came out) It's all a lie! The open-faced sandwich is a big scandal! He didn't just get it from Denmark... HE STOLE IT! (Everyone gasped)
• American Smuggler: How DARE you accuse me of such a crime out of nowhere? You have any manners, tough guy? You even have any evidence?
• Head Guard: Ja! Boys? (They showed the video footage)
• Jackson: (Gasps!) THAT'S WHERE MY BEST ENTERTAINMENT TAPE WENT!!! How could've it ended up being in the procession of the Danes-......... HAAAAAAANNE!!!!
• Head Guard: You are under arrest in the name of the Minister of Open-Faced Sandwiches! (Everyone booed and threw open-faced sandwiches at him as he was cuffed and Jackson quickly retreated)

Present

• Hanne: The rest, they say, is history! Now Hans is Public Enemy #1. Your welcome. You're free as a pretty songbird again, Skipper!
• Skipper: "As much as I'm glad I can be able to visit Denmark again Hanne, along with The Danes having their sandwich back, I think you made the mistake of not keeping up with what me and Hans been up to!"
• Hanne: "You mean like the neat-freak Zookeeper scenario and the double-agent thing?"
• Skipper: "Well that's the gist of it! Hans was our inside man in keeping an eye on what the Leage has been doing in reguards to their plan to free a race of evil demons via pure-hearted human females! (Hanne stared confused)..... I know, that sounds wack, but that's what happens when you mix Kingdom Hearts with Dragon Age and sprinkle it with cartoon characters. Deal with it. He was monitoring impourent things like their location, any latest plans to capture Kairi, and for awhile now about how Xehanort has been acting weird with a mysterious book lately! A very impourent thing we kept tabs on for awhile, and you just ruined it by doing an otherwise still great thing, but it was a victim of bad timing!"
• Hanne: "Well, sorry, I, I figured you and Hans would still be bitter enemies, how was I suppose to know you got involved with aliens and were trying to stop an occult doomsday?!"
• Skipper: "To be fair, ya didn't. Ya got too caught up with investigating the truth behind the Sandwich dishaster that you were never given a chance to catch up."
• Hanne: "..... Oh by the great danes of yore?! Skipper, I'm, well, Half-Sorry for solving the case in a bad time! I'm still otherwise glad I proved your innosence, but, I'm sorry I didn't kept up with what you two had been doing!"
• Skipper: "I take respondsability of doing too good of a job to keep my louger life incognito in this world. I already have certain enemies joining the likes of the Villain Leage.... I couldn't risk any more of them joining."
• Hanne: "..... Well, I can't go as far as getting Hans out of being public enemy of denmark because what he did is still wrong! But I can get our side of the Danes to relent on Hans."
• Skipper: "Good, but it's too late. Hans cover is blown. The Leage now knows what happened, and frankly, they're miffed!"
• Kolwalski: "And likely also disappointed that they recruited someone involved in a SANDWICH CONSPIRACTY OF ALL THINGS?! EVEN TEAM NEFARIOUS WOULDN'T BE THAT DESPERATE FOR A MEMBER?!"
• Hanne: "Well hey, since a Sandwich Conpsiracty is considerably stupid to your alien friends, maybe this will mean he be booted out from this "Villain Leage".... Real original name by the way."
• Skipper: Their idea, not ours. Also, with the leage, there's no retirement plans there. They even have little ability to fire their members, even when they're not dedicated to the cause. If anything, Hans being a wimp only gives them an excuse to use their corruptive magic to man him up to their level.
• Hanne: Well while we get on showing Hans mercy I still feel he doesn't need, you in particular have a lot of explaining to do. Especially to Private. Time to answer the one question he'll ask first:... WHY DID YOU NEVER TELL THEM ABOUT THIS?!?
• Kowalski: I hate to sound insubordinate, but I agree. We could've been arrested after thinking we were free with an expunged criminal record. You could've had us sent to a gulag.... OVER A SANDWICH?!
• Skipper: "Well like the story said, a Sandwich conspiracty is, kinda stupid sounding. We figured making it be all shrouded in mystery would make me and Hans look cool."
• Private: "Well, yes, a conspiracty involving a sandwich is, kinda ludicrist, but, we mean beyond the fact it sounded silly! Why were you unwilling to share it with us? We wouldn't've had been as mad as the danish were about the whole thing!"
• Skipper: "It was not that!"
• Kolwalski: "Then would it be the shame of failure to protect a recipe of a sandwich of all things?"
• Skipper: "No! I withheld that infomation...... To protect you guys....."
• Rico: "...... Huh?"
• Skipper: "(Sighs)...... I'm not just running from Denmark's law enforcements on human and animal sides. I'm also running from an organisation dedicated to dispose of any animal guilty of establishing a bad reputation with humans."
• Private: "Ya mean like North Wind?"
• Skipper: "Close, but except, instead of being for espionage.... They're trained assassins....."
• Kolwalski: "What exactly are you even talking about, man?!"
• Skipper: "I'm talking about..... The Nestsassins."
• Private: "(Giggles), Nests-assins?"
• Skipper: "Don't mock the name, people died doing that!! The Nestsassins are but one branch of a larger shadowy organisation of animals dedicated to dispose of any disgracer to the animal kingdom that gives humans a bad impression of, to prevent that backlashing to the point that humans would want to eradicate the speices of the idiot who started it!"
• Kolwalski: "Well what's the bigger organisation's name?"
• Skipper: "Extremely classifived, to the point that only the leader of the organisation knows! But besides the point. The Nestsassins are the bird division. They were the finest of the organization. They can silence and quietly dispose of any idiot dolt who makes animals look bad, or even a human out to declare an animal genocide, on even so much as an animal deemed a pest!"
• Kolwalski: "Well if this organization exists, THEN WHY ARE DR. BLOWHOLE AND DAVE A THING?!"
• Skipper: "They're viewed as a last resort ops. They're only if the worse case scenario has occurred."
• Private: "Trying to destroy humans and taking horrorable revenge on Penguins isn't worse-case scenario?"
• Skipper: "The fact they're doing it at all isn't enough. Not exactly the first time animals would be as extreme as Blowhole and David. It's the matter if they had succeeded and avoid last minute attempts by operatives to take it all down. They take care of any threat too great for any agency to handle. Like how I met...... Her....."
• Kolwalski/Private: "Her?"
• Rico: "Blah?"
• Skipper: "The best damn assassin they have for the Nestsassins... I remember that day I met her when I was struggling to prevent Denmark from being congured by a black rat who was a descendent of the rat that inadvertingly started the Black Death outbreak of our world. Out of the 10,065,000 descendants of that unlucky rodent heritage, he was the worst of the worst. And yes Kolwalski, the calulation was done in 2018, so don't bother interupting the drumatic tension! Anyway, he was trying to conquer Denmark by unearthing an ancient Viking curse in Denmark's museum. It was at least a week before I became suspitious of Hans behavior with Hanne....

Flashback

• (Skipper): "It was at the national museum of Denmark."
• Some Black Rats broke into the museum through the bathrooms, vents, and even cracks on the walls, as the Rats formed around a particular Viking Artifact that resumbles a hammer.
• A Rat leader with a bird skull on his head and wearing a stitched up cape of fur and hair showed up snarling as the rats obedently moved aside!
• Rat LT: "..... It, is finally ours, King Odin Rotte."
• King Rotte: ".... Yessssssssssssss. At long last....... The Staff Hammer of Odin, king of the Gods himself, within my grasp. I, waited years for this.... For too long, rats have been shamed, outcasted, and humiliated, because of what happened with all of europe that was because of the humans own bad hygene and those annoying hitch-hiking fleas?! In a part of canada, rats are prosicuted to near extinction?! Humans create horrendus weapons and traps to kill our kind?! They call exterminators on us?! They feed us to predators?! They don't let us inside their restaurents and homes?! They forced us to starve in filthy sewers, decrepted abandoned buildings and lands tainted with their wastes! We live, in hiding! We live, in fear?! We lived, like what the humans called us as?! VERMIN?! Well now..... That, ends?! With the Staff Hammer of Odin, I, will become the Odin of Rats! I, will bring ragnarok into human socity, and create a world where RATS are the dominante spieces?! We'll turn humans into the vermin?! WE WILL BE FREE OF THE OPPRESSION OF THEIR CRUELTY?! WE, WILL, BECOME, A RULING SPIECES?!"
• Rats: "ROTTE, ROTTE, ROTTE, ROTTE, ROTTE!"
• King Rotte embraced the phriase as the Rats continued phrasing him!
• King Rotte: "To get the Staff Hammer to accept me, we much do an anichent Asgardian Ritual, speak the norse incantation, so I may assend to the Staff's size, and become a god king of rats, so we can finally exact revenge on humans?!"
• ???: "A ratty revenge on humanity? That ain't gonna fly!"
• Skipper pounced onto King Rotte to the surprise of the Rats!
• King Rotte: "WHAT?! WHO ARE YOU, BIRD?!"
• Skipper: "I'm the guy who's taking you down, you god wanna-be?!"
• King Rotte: "(Wraps his tail around Skipper's neck and tosses him off) Big mistake, you artic swine?! RATS?! DESTROY HIM?!"
• The Rats brought out weapons of various types intending to hurt Skipper!
• Skipper: "..... Did you think I was dumb enough to come in my own? Now!"
• Hanne and Hans flew in!
• Hans: "FOR DENMARK?!"
• The Rats were surprised!
• The trio began to fight the rats!
• King Rotte got up and got to the staff and touched it and started to do the ritual as he spoke in a norse tongue.
• Skipper: "(Saw this)! JIMINY CHRISMAS?! (Slides off to stop Rotte, but some rats pounced onto Skipper and overwealmed him!)"
• King Rotte: "Yes?! YESSSS?! I WON?! I CAN FEEL THE POWER CORSING THROUGH MY VAINS?! I-"
• ???: "King Odin Jamole Rotte?"
• King Rotte: "Huh? Who said that- (His hand on the staff got stabbed into it by a tiny sword!) GAAAAAAAAAAAAH!?"
• A beautiful Yellow Magpie flew in armed with tiny blades.....
• Magpie: "...... You have been paid, your Due."
• King Rotte: "WHO ARE YOU?! AND HOW DARE YOU SMITE ME WITH- (Coughs greatly)!?"
• Magpie: "Be pointless to say..... That blade was laced with Rat Poison. And soon, your reign of terror will have ended before it began."
• King Rotte: "You.... (Coughs)..... You witch....... I, I will--....... (Dies and fell, leaning torwords the staff hammer as the Rats stared shock and retreated, as Skipper and the duo stared in amazement and surprise)......"
• Skipper: "..... Well ain't you a tall drink of water!"
• Magpie: "(Points a blade at him!)..... Pardon?"
• Skipper: "Whoa, whoa, easy there beautiful, just some amarican charm over here."
• Magpie: "..... Tch. Obviously a transfer. (Puts blade away)..... I am Nestsassin Due Gul."
• Skipper: "Oh, excotic! I bet it's beautiful!"
• Due: ".... It's litterally "Pigeon Yellow" in Danish."
• Skipper: "Well, the danish tongue made it more, classier and refined."
• Due was actselly flattered by this.....
• Due: "..... I'll confess, for a borish amarican, your not THAT bad of a flatteror. I wouldn't mind seeing you again should we are able to cross paths."
• Skipper: "How's about you and me visit the food market? Fish and Seeds on me, babe."
• Due: "(Laughs lightly), I'll keep my eye on you yet, Penguin."
• Skipper: "Names Skipper, actually."
• Due: ".... And I thought my name was odd. Would you rather I name you Springe?"
• Skipper: "Springe?"
• Due: "Sorry, there's no offictal danish word for Skipper, yet there's one for Skip."
• Skipper: "Well, it's the thought that counts."
• Due: "I'll see you again when, it's Due. (Flies off)....."
• Skipper: "..... What a woman....."
• Hans: "..... He, did not, just successfuly hooked up with a member of THE Nestsassins! AND ONE OF THEIR BEST NO LESS!"
• Hanne: "Oh let him have his moment, Hans!"
• Hans: "I'm just saying they usually extremely strict about establishing bonds!"

The Return of Jackson the Mutt

Jackson's Hideout

• A russel terrier was seen gambling with a gang of mobster dogs in almost alou to the famous Poker Dogs painting.
• Bulldog: "..... I kinda feel like we're inadvertingy paying homage to a famous iconic joke painting somehow."
• Shepard: "Oh shut it, Muttsly, you don't know what your talking about."
• Pitball: "(German Accent) I have a winning paw, mates. Ya may as well fold."
• St Bernard: "(Polish Accent) Oh don't you be trying any bluffies now!"
• Shepard: "Yeah come on Arnald, ya ain't fooling anyone!"
• ???: "Jackson. (Hao arrived as the Gangster dogs freaked out and wimpered in fear, but the Russel Terrier remained unfased, in fact is more annoyed then frighten. This was Jackson, but we kinda already established that earlier before, but, whatever.)"
• Jackson: "..... Aw come on, Hao, I told you to not show up on poker night with the boys! They're so, freaked out by you!"
• Hao: "Forgive my interuption of your game night, Jackson-San. But it is about the Denmark Agents..... Hanne is here and has finally rallied Skipper into finally conspire against you."
• Jackson: WHAT?!? HANNE IS HERE?!
• Hao: Yes. They discussed their mission of stopping us in the Hoboken Zoo.
• Jackson: "...... Sorry fellas, Poker Night's off! Some business came up."
• Arnald: "But I finally got a winning paw!"
• Jackson: Too bad, so sad. Go poop on someone's lawn or something.
• Arnald: Yeesh, self-speciesist much?
• Jackson: Cry me a river. Alright, Hao, what's up about them?
• Hao: Well I came to warn you further about Hanne's new pet.
• Jackson: Pet?
• Hao: A Great Dane named Copenhagen. Rescued her from euthanasia. She's tracking your scent and could be on her way as we speak.
• Jackson: Ugh! Lucky bird. As if stealing my favorite entertainment tape and using it as evidence against my master to get him sent to prison wasn't enough. Now she sends one of our own kind after us?
• Hao: I believe it's one of the... Disabled variants.
• Jackson: Oy! I hate that kind of dog. They make us ashamed to be ourselves.
• St Bernard: And I thought that English Mastiff in Central Park was a complete dumbass.
• Bulldog: Oh, so you lost your owner, big deal! I never liked humans anyway. All they do is stuff your face into places you pee in, sometimes with a spanking, cut off your balls, treat you like slaves or second-class citizens, and in that Copenhagen dog's case, kill you whenever they want. You do know that we exist because they domesticated us. They welcome us like family, and this is the thanks we get? Humans are just a blight on this world. Makes us at the Bad Dawgs Gang glad to be street dogs. No rules, no responsibility, no craps given.
• Jackson: Nobody asked for your opinion, Benjamin! You strays don't know nothing about being loved purely by humans. The only one that does is the sobby Neapolitan Mastiff Sulky. HER I respect.
• Arnald: Who?
• Pug: Doesn't ring a bell.
• Australian Shepard: (Australian accent) No bell, mate.
• Jackson: My point exactly. You guys just invited her because she never stopped begging for it. That's why you're just a bunch of dogs that are only good for gambling.
• ???: Don't forget we took you in when your owner was arrested. (A Giant Schnauzer crime boss with a black puffy beard appeared with a Boxer and a crazy Chinese Crested Dog assistant)... And you know what they say, boy. As long as you live with us, you obey OUR rules!
• Jackson: (Sighs) Hey, Boss Van Rabies. It's just, remember that I don't plan to stay forever.
• Giant Schnauzer (Van Rabies): Because you're still trying to avenge your old owner?
• Chinese Crested Dog: (Dubbed as crazy pound dog in Lady and the Tramp 2) Eeeheeheeheehee, boy's got a death wish. He's dead. Eeeheeheeheehee!!!
• Boxer: Crackers, will you stop... Well, cracking? Jackson, we've told you this plan of yours isn't going to work. It's not worth losing your newfound freedom to avenge some dumb human.
• Jackson: Okay, let's make something clear! If you invite dogs with former masters, it's not wise to insult their masters until they're over them. It's one thing to have an opinion, and I GET IT, you guys, don't have alot of fond memories with humans, and that's fine for yas, but don't rub it into newbies like me. Got it?
• Van Rabies: Your assertion is admirable, Jackson, but insult aside, it's not worth a predictable defeat. There were others like you and they learned the hard way. The Bad Dawgs are free of humans after hardships and wrongdoing from them.
• Jackson: Well this time, it's different.
• Boxer: Well, let's see how long THAT lasts.
• Hao: Everyone, I hate to bother you in the midst of your argument, but Copenhagen is on her way.
• Van Rabies: I have turned dogs against their friends and masters before. A simple Great Dane is not a problem for us. Tell him, Boxford.
• Boxer (Boxford): If you really want to steer a Great Dane off your track, even one as mentally dumb as this one, you must turn her against society. She was almost ended by that cruel euthanasia law after all. Why should a dog like her support such a cause for both humans and animals crazy enough to defend them after that? She'd has to be hopelessly retarded to still want to do that!
• Benjimin: "Though based on that she's working with one such human defender, I can bet ya she is that hopeless."
• Jackson: I'm starting to think this is just to get another member to replace me.
• Boxford: "Well excuse us for figuring that your likely gonna go out with a wimper with that nutty plan of yours! This attempt is gonna see you get thrown into a shelter and back under a human's leash before ya realise it!"
• Arnald: "Which probuly is what he tecnecally wants!"
• Van Rabies: Take it anyway you must. It's what the Bad Dawgs are all about. We free ourselves from the shackles of humanity and do our own thing. Think about it. (They left)
• Crackers: Eeeheeheeheehee, you're gonna start a scene boy, eeeheeheeheehee!!!!
• Jackson: "Yeesh. I cannot read that Schnauzer for the life of me, not even on the butt!"
• Hao: "I'm sure the feeling's mutual in how you still have a compassion for a human."
• Jackson: "Oh sure, the Dawgs had rough exspeariences with the humans, but I know my master's different then those kind of hairless apes that didn't gave them the greatest exspeariences ever. I obviously got one of the good ones.... Well, as good as a guy who almost pulled the perfect international scam can be, but hey, I never said humans were perfect."
• Hao: "Well I doubt there would be so many animals angered as their transgressions if Humanity was perfect. But we are off topic. We should be prepared for the Denmark agents."
• Benjamin: I say take Boxford's advice. Turn the literal bitch against her friends.
• Jackson: Benjamin, I don't think that's a good idea. I wouldn't do that if I knew there a high chance that Copenhagen is dumb enough to still support the society that almost put her down.
• Pug: Boy, if she is dumb, she should be easy to sway.
• Jackson: Chubb, she's clearly the dog that's TOO dumb for that.
• Pug (Chubb): Wouldn't hurt to try.
• Australian Shepard: Listen to yaself, ya dumb wanker!! It WOULD hurt if it fails!!
• Arnald: Gotta agree with Crikey, mein friend. You got accurate hearing, why don't you use them?!
• Jackson: Guys! I am NOT going to manipulate Copenhagen like that. It's a bet I'd rather not take. It's guaranteed to fail.
• Arnald: Well, got any of ze better plans?
• Jackson: Well you guys are dogs. You can handle the chick-
• St Bernard: I have to correct you there, Jackson. The biggest dog breed is not the kind of thing to be challenged, even if she's dumber than Scooby-Doo. We had one with us who we ended up getting thrown in the pound... Van Rabies' brother took his place and was euthanized that day. We do not challenge a dog that towers us and is especially too dumb to give up.
• Jackson: "Well I'm not gonna try and malmitulate the dumb bitch! Not only would it never work anyways, but that would end up making things MORE personal then it already is! Trust me, Hannes does not tend to go easy with guys that go too far! Ya know what happened to the Tiger Shark that tried to kill Hans? HE HAS TO WEAR DENTURES NOW?!"
• Benjimin: "But don't sharks re-grow teeth?"
• Jackson: "..... Ya don't wanna know the details, but let's just say.... Hanne got creative in neuturing that Tiger Shark as a threat for good without killing him, because what he tried to do to Hans, death was too passive in her eyes! So she made it that the Tiger Shark can NEVER grow teeth again! True story, Hao told me about it. It was how Hans and Hanne used to be an item."
• Arnald: "..... Okay, so, maybe, just avoid the dumb bitch all-togather, ja?"

Transcript

Coming soon...