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Icky and Iago: Lost in the Dragon Realms is the 31st Episode of Season 3B of the SpongeBob and Friends Adventures Chronicles series. With what happened with SpongeBob's crazy wish, Icky and Iago decide to take some time off. After accidentally stopping a massive robbery at one of the smart-vaults of MoneyBanks from the Thieves Guild, especially from their grand leader the Master Thief, they end up being taken hostage, and held in an unknown TG location. Luckily, the two are able to escape, and find that they are still in the Dragon Realms, but at an unknown location. And so they must travel the Dragon Realms in search of their comrades who are also looking for them. All the while, the two birdbrains end up traveling to new lands and meeting new people along the way including the beautiful Princess Zoe, who has a hateful history with Sparx, Lady Elora, a half-serious half-giddy faun from Faun Island, the return of LOS Hunter, the intelligent Professor Joule, the magical rabbit sorceress Lady Bianca, the cunning and sneaky monkey agent known as Agent IX and his 8 teammates, the penguin son of the deceased LOS version of Sgt Byrd, James Byrd Jr who wishes to be like his dad, Sheila the vigilante 'badass' celebrity girl who is almost like Tracer, Abominable Bentley, a primitive but smart Yeti from the Himalayas, alongside his younger brother Abominable Bartholomew, and many others while uncovering the Master Thief's secret plans to invade the giant gold castle-mansion of MoneyBanks' president, Sir Moneybags. Both Icky and Iago, as well as their other comrades, must now find a way to find each other again, and put a stop to the Master Thief's plan once and for all.

Transcript

Elton John- The Trail We Blaze

Elton John- The Trail We Blaze

Intro/Montage Theme (Elton John- The Trail We Blaze)

Chapter 1: One Thing After Another

Dragon Temple

  • Kairi:... Well... I guess this is goodbye.
  • SpongeBob: (In waiter outfit) Yeah... It's still, sad, that I had to learn to let you go the hard way... And embarrassing at that.
  • Lord Shen: "And one that needlessly included a wish-granting birthday cake!"
  • Shifu: "And erased a key event in history, for that matter."
  • Spongebob: "I feel like that's gonna haunt me for awhile, isn't it?"
  • Po: "At least be glad Stacy doesn't know about this."
  • Kairi: ".... If it makes ya feel Better, Spongebob.... We can always see eachother again on holidays or celebrations.... And whenever we try another bro-sister thing with Spyro again, even if those ALWAYS seem to end in disaster."
  • Spongebob: "I'd like that Kairi. I would."
  • Thus, Kairi and Boy Sora got on the gummi ship and it blasted off....
  • Lord Shen: "..... I will say this, Square One.... Your little, escapade, did supplied us with a new secondary purpose.... Being a family. Thus, I believe it would always be assured that we're staying together no matter the current distance."
  • Shifu: "I could not said it better myself."
  • Spongebob: ".... So, I guess for now, I'm back to making Krabby Patties at a minimum wage."
  • Shifu: "Yes, but don't worry. (Gives out communicator) We are never too far behind, no matter the distance. The Lougers are still together. And the Dragon Guardian temple is still a home away from home."
  • Spongebob: "Yeah, and that's diffidently true with Icky and Iago.... Say where are those loveable birdbrains anyway."
  • Lord Shen: "They've went to Dragon Realms New York to do some shopping before they return to their separate realms. Let's hope they didn't do anything, atypical of them again."
  • Sparx: Heh. Another Brian and Stewie-style episode. I bet it's one that'll be a world-building one for this land.
  • Spyro: Eh, I wouldn't say that's a good or bad thing. Remember when you got in trouble with Princess Zoe?
  • Sparx: "Please don't bring her into this. I'm over her, now that I'm starting to earn Fire's attention."
  • Spyro: "Heh, that's surprisingly mature of you, Sparx."
  • Sparx: "Well, that and she clearly doesn't like me."
  • Cynder: "(Playfully teasey) Kinda your own fault in that, Sparx."
  • Fidget: Huh?
  • Sparx: Oh, yeah. We never told you about the times we had before the Villain League corrupted Cynder AND after we beat Malefor.... AND when Spyro and Cynder decided that maybe they weren't ready to be a couple again. See, one time, we went to the Fairy Realms, where I met, the HOTTEST fairy of them all, Princess Zoe. She's the princess of hotness.
  • Thundera: Si, we got that.
  • Sparx: Buuuut... Let's just say, back then, I had so many women problems, so I became sort've a bachelor, without Spyro and Cynder knowing. One that didn't even get a single girl.
  • Spyro: We were SUPPOSED to be helping the fairies from some fairy smugglers.
  • Sparx: C'mon, when you're exactly a fairy's size, you can't help... Extending your tail. But when they found Roman City, the most out-of-nowhere thing happened.

Cutaway

  • Drunken Fairy: (She came in buzzing around and yet in Sparx's head, she was hot) WEEEEEEEWWOOOO!! *BUUURP* Which one of you fairy men wants to gimme a big fat kiss? (Some men shivered and even the smugglers were baffled)... Alright, I'LL DO IT! (She ended up kissing Sparx on the lips)
  • Sparx:... OhhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

Present

  • Spyro: Everyone knows about the magic in a Fairy Realms fairy's kiss. For dragons, it makes their elemental breath, magical and affect anything no matter the defense. But when it came to other magical creatures, like a glowing dragonfly... Welll...

Cutaway

  • Sparx: I'M C***IIIIIIIIIIIIIIING!! (He fires dragon breath like a dragon brewing with magical energy) OOOOOOHHH, YEEEAAAAAHHHH, THIIIS FEELS LIKE CAAANDI TIIIIMES!!!
  • Fairy: HEY, I'M OVER THAT!
  • Sparx: WAIT, YOUR NAME IS CANDI WITH AN I?!? THAT'S HOT!!
  • Smuggler: SHUT UP, FAIRY! (He shook her cage)
  • Sparx: HEY! DON'T YOU DO THAT TO HER! (He set him on fire as he screamed comically) AND THAT GOES DOUBLE FOR ALL A YA! (He scared them with his magic, and though he chased them all away, he damaged much of Roman City)
  • Zoe: WHAT THE DEVIL IS GOING ON HERE?!?
  • Sparx:... WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, BABY! (He kissed Zoe aggressively as she was so freaked she pushed herself away and spattered) Ahhhhh. That felt SO good.
  • (Baloo): Okay, I'm sure it went that way, but did you HAVE to be completely accurate about it?
  • (Sparx): I don't know, maybe that magic is still inside me.
  • Zoe: EECCKKH!! YOU, YOU PERVERTED DRAGONFLY!!
  • Sparx:... Wh... What just hap-PENED?!? (He saw the damage he caused)... Did I do this? PLEASE tell me I didn't do this. And if I did, HOW?!?
  • Spyro:... A drunken fairy kissed you.
  • Zoe: WHAT?!?... It was Baccha, wasn't it?
  • Baccha: (wakes up) Uuuughh! What just happened? I just recovered from another bad hangover! (Looks around and surveys the damage)... I kissed someone again, didn't I?
  • Sparx:... A fairy's kiss can do THAT?!
  • Cynder: A fairy's kiss contains powerful magic.
  • Sparx:... Uhhh... (Chuckles nervously)... Uh... Don't you just hate having your boner doing the talking?
  • Zoe:...

Present

  • Sparx: So I was banished from the Fairy Realms for life.
  • Spyro: Actually, we convinced Zoe to cut you some slack because you're still my adopted brother. AND, fairies KINDA considered you a hero.
  • Cynder: Despite Zoe's outright frustration.
  • Sparx: Well, it felt like banishment to me.
  • Lord Shen: "Ugh. Well hopefully Prehistoric One and the Loudmouth Parrot are not so easily prone to such mishaps."

Dragon Realms New York

  • Icky: (He and Iago were riding carriages in the streets of New York, which was different than was seen from before, including Gem Lamps, carriages, and sometimes cars, and magical technology)... Alright, we got what we need.
  • Iago: Wow, the Times Square Marketplace has gotten a HUGE renovation this year. It went from just being the stock appearance of typical New York to now being, this.
  • Icky: Eh, I consider 2020 a remarkable year of change. The TRUE future magic year.... Granted, the year was still off to a crap start.
  • Iago: If that's how you can put it... I'll do it too. (Familiar laughter and chuckling was heard) What the- (They saw a blue thief similar to the quick ones in the original Spyro games running through)
  • Axle: STOP! THIEF!!! (He fired electric bolts at the thief but he was too fast)
  • Thief: NA-NANA-NANA! HAHAHA!
  • Axle: DON'T MOCK ME! I ALWAYS HATED THAT LAUGH FROM BOTH THE OLD GAMES AND THE REIGNITED TRILOGY?! (He kept firing electric bolts at him) URGH! COME, ON, YOU, DAMN, BLUE, CLOWN!!
  • Icky: Wow, he must be having trouble.
  • Axle: (On radio) THIS IS OFFICER AXLE, CALLING FOR BACKUP! (Soon another thief appeared in the shadows)
  • Unknown Thief: I don't think so. (He approached a snail-elephant)... Time to make Times Square shake. (He slashed his sword on it and caused a stampede, causing traffic damage and wild animal craziness)
  • Iago: WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?!?
  • Icky: I think I have a pretty good idea. Look! (They saw some figures in the shadows as Bullington and other UUPD cops arrived)
  • Axle: Chief! It is an ambush! (More Classic-Spyro thieves appeared from the shadows)
  • Bullington: (Dubbed as Razoul) Not in THIS city! (The thieves displayed slick moves when robbing people, including a sword-and-knife-wielding thief, acrobatic ninja thieves, a martial artist thief, a fat goofy thief, an Indian rope magician thief, triplet thieves, and so much more)
  • Iago: ".... That, feels, oddly familiar."
  • Icky: Well, this just came out of nowhere. Iago? Hold them off. I'll find somewhere safe to get the Lodgers. (He flew off as someone saw him and flew off after him)
  • Unknown Thief: Alright, now for the grand prize. (He found a bank dubbed 'MoneyBanks' with a 'Hallelujah' choir heard in the background)... Come to papa. (A piece of wood was tossed at him from behind)
  • Iago: MEET YOUR MATCH, ZORRO!!
  • Unknown Thief:... Good birdie. Polly want a little-
  • Iago: SAY 'CRACKER' AND I'LL LET YOU HAVE IT ON PRINCIPLE!! (He swung a piece of wood at him as the Unknown Thief just took it and grabbed him by the wings)
  • Unknown Thief: I must say, you have a lot of spirit... (Iago struggled and was stuffed inside a mailbox)... And a LOT of mouth, for a parrot. HAH! I crack myself up. (He walked for the place as Icky saw)
  • Icky: UGH! You had one job, Iago!
  • Iago: (From inside the mailbox) I TRIED!!
  • Icky: (He kicked the mailbox towards the MoneyBanks Bank and followed him) LET'S JUST GO STOP HIM BEFORE HE PULLS OFF A WORSE HEIST! (They went off after him as the unknown flying figure followed them with a girly giggle)

Inside Bank.

  • The Guards were already disabled as the bank tellers and visitors were already held-hostage.
  • Unknown Thief: "Alright, ya people know the drill. Get ready to enjoy our loot and then the vault afterwards, or I can't promise that I'll have to wash my robes again if I have to get "Messy", capish?"
  • ???: Sorry, buster! (Icky appeared with Iago still in the mailbox) The bank is closed!
  • Unknown Thief:... HAH! Are YOU the Lodgers' jesters?
  • (Iago): I RESENT THAT, YOU NIMROD!!!
  • Icky: No speed for you this time. We have you cornered! There's two of us, and only one of you!
  • ???: Wow, you must suck at math even worse than me, baby. Because there's TWO of him. (They were both turned into sheep with the mailbox popping open when Iago was transformed)
  • Icky: BAAAAAA!!
  • Iago: BAAAAAA?!?!
  • Unknown Thief: Well, what took YOU so long, my love? (A female genie appeared)
  • Genie Woman: It's Times Square, schnookums.
  • Unknown Thief: GEE NEE!! I TOLD YOU NOT TO CALL ME THAT IN FRONT OF PEOPLE!
  • Iago: BAAAAAAAAAA!!
  • Thief 1: "Master Thief, we've got the vault opened! That moolah is ready to go!"
  • Master Thief: Excellent! Let's split.
  • Iago: BAAAAAAAA!!! (They ran off but accidentally turned on the sprinklers spraying water everywhere and shortening the power to the room, causing everyone to hit each other and end up allowing the police to bust in and arrest all the thieves minus a few and Master Thief, who teleport away with help from Gee Nee)
  • Axle: "Oh good, we were able to catch SOME of these sheep! Thanks to the two- (Sees Icky and Iago as sheep)..... Sheep?"
  • Jennet: "Uh oh, I think Icky and Iago met Master Thief's Genie."
  • Axle: "WAIT, THOSE SHEEP ARE THE LOUGERS?!"
  • Icky: "BAAAAAAAAAAAAA?!"
  • Iago: "BAAAAAAAAAA?!"
  • Axle: ".... I'm gonna assume that's a yes."
  • Bullington: "I'll be sure the Lougers are notified."
  • Stacy comes in!
  • Stacy: "This is Stacy Mill Rumorsica, and-"
  • Bullington: "Hey, miss, you have to leave, this is a crime scene!"
  • Stacy: "I EXERCISE MY RIGHT TO FREEDOM OF THE PRESS?!"
  • Axle: "Hey, get lost before ya become a new Popeyes' Chicken Recipe, lady?!"
  • Stacy: "(Quietly) Ohh, a corrupt cop story! Keep talking, eel boy, I can use that!"
  • Axle: "I SAID SCRAM, BITCH?!"
  • The Cops began forcing Stacy out!
  • Icky: "BAAAA?! BAAAAAA?! BAA BAA BAA BAAAAAA?!"
  • Jennet: "Sorry, you two will have to find a way to get normal without us!"
  • The cops go forword out!
  • Icky: ".... (DOES THE GOAT SCREAM?!)"
  • Iago: "Baa baaaaaa."
  • A Fairy happened to be there and saw the duo.
  • Fairy: ".... (Quietly) Those two are gonna need my help. (Gets to the two sheepifived duo) Excuse me, Lougers, I could help you back to being birdbrains again."
  • Icky: Baaa?
  • Fairy: ".... Okay, this is gonna be hard without you guys speaking English.... Okay, One Baa for yes, two baas for no, understand?"
  • Icky:... Baaa.
  • Fairy: Alright. (She transformed them back)
  • Icky: OH YES, MY JEFF BENNETT VOICE IS BACK!! THANK YOU!!!
  • Fairy:... Are you okay? I can assume you tried to beat Master Thief and came across his genie girlfriend?
  • Icky: GENIE, girlfriend?
  • Iago: Wow. He's got a genie? Well, damn! How're we gonna beat him now?... Who are you anyway?
  • Fairy:... My name is Princess Zoe, leader of the Fairy Realms of South America. I was here to inform the Shell Lodgers about some evil plot involving the Master Thief.
  • Iago: Wait... Zoe? OH, you mean the one Sparx told us about.
  • Zoe: OH, GOD! DO NOT BRING THAT UP! THAT WAS AN EMBARRASSING TIME! EECCKH! I mean, no personal offense to your group considering his membership, but-
  • Icky: "We know, this was before the Lougers and what Sparx likely did was I'm sure disgusting and immapprobeate. But if it helps, he's into another Dragonfly that normally hangs out with a King Cobra, and I believe that Sparx has grown up abit."
  • Zoe: "All the same, I wish that girl some LUCK! Cause that guy, looks like he's high maintenance to cope with!"
  • Iago: "Ahem, ya said something that "Master Thief" guy planning something big?"
  • Zoe: Oh, yes indeed. Ahem. Master Thief and Gee Nee are both planning a master heist on MoneyBanks Headquarters.
  • Icky: Is he now?
  • Zoe: He is now.
  • Iago: Hey, we dealt with genies before. You just gotta destroy their lamp.
  • Zoe: Gee Nee is a free genie.
  • Iago/Icky:.... DAMMIT!
  • Icky: Which means she's unstoppable, and by extension, Master Thief.
  • Zoe: Why do you think the Thieves Guild is so expansive? They're everywhere. I came after the Thieves Guild started getting more active in South America. Many of my fellow fairies have been kidnapped for the pet trade.
  • Iago: UGH! No respect for tiny hotties, am I right?
  • Zoe: Watch it, buddy, I've put up with s*** like that from Sparx as is, I don't want to have to include you two into the list of people I have to give royal restraining orders to! Espeically not now when I have earnest need of you two!
  • Iago: YIKES, WOMAN!... I like you. You don't take s*** from anyone.
  • Zoe: Well, don't get attached. I just need the Lodgers' help to save my people.
  • Icky: Ehh, they're kinda occupied at the moment taking a separation break that's now starting to be a thing when Kairi doesn't need protection from the League anymore.
  • Zoe: SERIOUSLY?! THE DRAGON REALMS ARE IN A GLOBAL THIEF INVASION, AND THEY'RE GOING OFF SOMEWHERE ELSE?!?
  • Iago: Well, on top of that, they promised Kairi they'd help her pack her things to move to Destiny Islands given she's... Married with Sora now.
  • Zoe:... Wow. Congratulations. Though I think I can understand why these thieves have gotten so bold recently. They think the Lougers are a non-issue now that they started to take breaks since Kairi is no longer cult bait.
  • Icky: None needed, and the league's not nessersarly a cult. Cult-like maybe, but not one in serious nature. Besides, if it helps, we are still an active group otherwise, as now our new secondary purpose is being a family. That happened cause, SpongeBob had a little... Incident, when coping with Kairi being a retired element of the series. Also, uh, oh yeah, THIEVES ARE INVADING EVERYWHERE?!?
  • Zoe: Yes. As before, I'm guessing these guys think the Lougers are no real concern anymore now that you guys will start to separate temporarily until ya find a new problem. And boy, are they taking this for granted! MoneyBanks Banks are being raided all over the world.
  • Iago: WELL, THAT'S JUST GREAT! They're raiding everything everywhere on this world, AND they got an all-powerful free genie on their side, AND while the other Lougers got preoccupied with something else?! AND ONCE AGAIN, I'M SO TICKED OFF THAT I'M MOLTING!!
  • Icky: "Ugh, we're gonna end up taking a hit in reputation if Stacy puts two and two together here?! I'm gonna have to make sure I talk to Shen about this and about implementing a way for us to still be in the Dragon Guardian Temple for at least on normal weekdays and to only do our own thing on the weekends and implement some kinda system about crud happening during off-times!"
  • Zoe: Ahem. Something for you guys to figure out later. Let's just focus on the intermediate first, THEN worry about waits to prevent further surprises, okay? That said.... There ARE ways to unfree a Genie.
  • Icky: There are?
  • Zoe: Yeah. I mean, there's some genie magic books about rebinding a genie to a lamp or bottle if they prove unworthy to be free, like when they abuse their infinite power. And I can imagine getting with criminals counts as such.
  • Icky: Then why didn't you just use that when she showed up?
  • Zoe: You think I hadn't tried?

Cutaway

  • Zoe: (She buzzed in to find the Fairy Library ransacked)... (The camera panned off far away so that Zoe's cursing and angry rage was squeaky)

Present

  • Zoe: Gee Nee took all genie books.
  • Iago: Hey, there's magic books in the library. I bet there's one about genies there.

Library

  • Icky: Got any books about dealing with free genies?
  • Librarian: No, sorry. A free genie came in and bought all the copies.
  • Icky: DAMMIT, that's the 57th library with that same story! And I bet the Dragon Guardian Temple Libary had some copies taken too!
  • Zoe: Like I said, Gee Nee is a smart woman, even inspite sometimes acting like a giggly cunt.
  • Icky: F*******************!!
  • Everyone: SSSHHH!
  • Icky:... (Quietly) F************************!
  • Everyone: (Quietly) LANGUAGE!

Outside

  • Icky: UGH!
  • Zoe: Ahem. Well, since the Lodgers are, busy with helping their grown-up princess, and that likely you guys are the best I can have at the moment, how about you two just fill in for them and help out?
  • Icky: "Ya know we can just call with them our communicators and-"
  • Zoe: "Let's be honest boys, those things likely didn't survived your little sprinkler surprise."
  • The Duo looked at their ruined communicators....
  • Iago: Frick... Eh, beats sitting around here complaining about having nothing better to do.
  • Icky: Let's head out, babe.
  • Zoe:... And for the record... (She zapped him in the balls as he did this)
ANK!!

ANK!!

  • Zoe: DON'T, CALL ME BABE!
  • Icky: AHHHAH, OKAY, PAMELA ANDERSON, JESUS!! OHHO, I THINK SHE JUST MADE MY BALLS DISAPPEAR!!
  • Zoe: "Don't worry, that's only the numbing sensation, it wears off eventually."
  • Icky: "And now I'm back to being scared of tiny people with bug wings again like with the History Sprites. Owwwww."
  • Zoe: "Then that teaches you to not underestimate fairies just because we're like tiny flying dolls to you."
  • Icky: Sex dolls or regular dolls-
  • Zoe: BOOOOTH!!!
  • Icky/Iago: "AAAAAAAAH?!"
  • Iago: "Now I'm scared of tiny people with bug wings!"
  • Zoe: GOOD! I'd rather be feared than loved.
  • Iago: I'd prefer the other way around, but there's ALWAYS too much of a good thing.
  • Icky: Whatever, let's just go to the SA.

South American Rainforest

  • Zoe: (They teleported there) Here we are.
  • Iago: WHOAHOA! That was quick.
  • Zoe: Well, our homes were bad enough since we're STILL recovering from the 2019 Magic Fritz, but so far it's been going well.... Mostly.
  • ???: Zoe! You're back! (A glasses-wearing fairy appeared) Did you tell the Lodgers about our situation?
  • Zoe: No, no, Miss Bubbles, they're occupied on some... Princess business.
  • Bubbles: AGAIN?! My magical spell scrolls have all been SWIPED, and THEY'RE doing something else?!
  • Zoe: I KNOW! In fact, it may have been why the thieves became so bold recently! It almost makes me wish the League didn't decide to give up that hiatused plan because it took too long and that the guy who made it turned out to be crazy! But these two are all we got of them.
  • Bubbles:... The jesters? Seriously? I would've rather you brought the dragonfly back, cause at least he'll be connected to the Purple Dragon and Cynder!
  • Iago: Watch it, sister.
  • Zoe: Sorry about her. This is my secretary and master mage scribe, Bubbles.
  • Icky: Heheh. Cute name.
  • Bubbles: CUTE?!?
  • Zoe:... And she doesn't like being hit on as much as I don't.
  • Icky: "Hey whoa, easy, I meant cute as a platonic compliment, I have a griffin girlfriend!"
  • Iago: "And I'm all good with a rainbow weather bird!"
  • Bubbles: "Still not crazy with being called "Cute" though! I have a bad association with that word from guys who are PERVS about it!"
  • Icky: "Is that gonna be true with every fairy? Even the dudes?"
  • Bubbles: If it involves the opposite gender, yes. Love HAS no boundaries.
  • Zoe: It's true. We may not be an easily f***able size, but the next best thing would be having a little person playing with your unmentionables. YEEEEHEHEHEHEHEEE!!
  • Icky: Touche. So, where's your fairy buddies?
  • Iago: "And I hope their situation isn't too difficult to handle."
  • Zoe: Too bad, it is. THAT'S why we made such a big deal about you all not being here. There's too many thieves.
  • Iago: AAAHGH!
  • Zoe: CAN YOU NOT SCREAM YOUR DRY GILBERT GOTTFRIED VOICE?!? IT SOUNDS LIKE A CAT WITH LARYNGITIS!!
  • Iago: What'd you expect? I'm a parrot.
  • Zoe: Whatever, look, all my friends KINDA need help. I REFUSE to allow Isabelle, Calliope, Liz, Flora, Cookie, Doodles, Clara, Dotty, and most importantly, Persephone and her squad, to be PETS! Or at worse, sex slaves for people's perverse pleasures!
  • Iago: Wow, with fairies with SOME names like those, they'd SOUND like pets.
  • Zoe: INDEED! It's APPALLING! I've taken a LOT of flirting and humiliation over my years as leader of the Fairy Realms, but THIS, THIS is where I draw the line!
  • Icky: Hasn't this happened before?
  • Zoe: Not since THAT time with Sparx. Seriously, it's SO annoying that ONE master heist for MoneyBanks HQ is enough to get ALL the thieves coming out at the same time.
  • Icky: (Sighs) We'll see what we can do. Just direct us to where the guys of this location are hiding out in.
  • Bubbles: "They went somewhere east, possibly where an old Ape Base resides from back in the times before the rebirth."
  • Iago: "Then that's where we're going."

The abandoned Ape Base.

  • The Thieves gathered up the fairies in cages, as the operation is monitored by an Arpeggio-looking Parrot.
  • Thief Assistant: "Good news, Count Winnipeggus, the fairies are ready for sale."
  • Count Winnipeggus: "(Chuckles), Yeees. I could not ask for a better way to celebrate the Lougers' self-easing by having the perfect new pet items for my black market pet trade! The guild will make a FORTUNE from these little beauties!"
  • Thief assistant: "Even if that customer might be a perv?"
  • Count Winnipeggus: "Now now, Tomas, we're not in the business to question the motives of customers. We're in the business of having a non-law sanctioned operation."
  • Tomas: "I know sir, just checking."
  • Count Winnipeggus: "So, are all fairies accounted for?"
  • Tomas: "..... Ehhhhhh, the queen and her sidekick kinda proved too difficult to catch, so-"
  • Count Winnipeggus: "YOU DIDN'T CATCH THE QUEEN?! Oh now she's gonna become a problem for us and risk having the Lougers' alarmed?! YOU BUNGLER?!"
  • Tomas: "Uh, don't, don't worry sir, I thought ahead and asked for a super scary mercenary to go after her!"
  • Count Winnipeggus: "Which one?"
  • Tomas: "Well, he's basically a defect Ape that's gone to the mercenary life. That guy is a REAL BEAST, believe me! He claims to be the brother of Gaul, but-"
  • Count Winnipeggus: "(Surprised face) You hired Helheim the Gore Master? HE'S TOO OVERKILL FOR EVEN THE FAIRY QUEEN?! HE'LL END UP' BRINGING HER BACK DEAD, EVEN IF IT'S JUST BLOOD ON HIS WRIST BLADES?! Also, HE DOES NOT COME CHEAP?! I'm gonna have to give all my profits!"
  • Tomas: "Don't worry sir, I asked him to bring the queen and the scribe back alive!"
  • Count Winnipeggus: "Well, good, BUT HE'S STILL GONNA BE EXPENSIVE TO PAY BACK?! Ugh, at least there's the hope that maybe he'll be the guy that would cream those misfits should they get involved now! OH NOW I'M WORRIED HE'LL CHARGE EXTRA IF THEY GET INVOLVED?!"
  • Tomas: We'll figure it out, okay?! Also, the apes have been recovering from a bad reputation lately. Not ALL apes are loyal to Malefor and the Villain League. It's like... Unmentionable real-life terrorists... Their actions affect their own people too. Plus, some that used to serve Malefor are STILL cursed into being living skeletons.
  • Count Winnipeggus: That's the thing. HE used to serve Malefor too, until he had the smarts to realize that Malefor was too evil for his own good and left before he could suffer the same curse his followers suffered. Now that the Dragon Realms are reformed, he has to make a new name for himself. No rules but his own. And his rules, are absolutely risky for those who hire him. He's not called the 'Gore Master' for nothing. He's the Grim Reaper. He never leaves without taking a soul!
  • Tomas: Well, there's a first time for everything. Tomas isn't even my real name. I just stole it from one of the Dragons that helped settlers rebuild the Dragon Realms after the Great Cleansing. The warrior bard.
  • Count Winnipeggus:... Why? And what's your real name?
  • Tomas:... Because I wanted respect, and... Gaylord.
  • Count Winnipeggus:... (Scoffs into hysterical laughter)
  • Tomas: SEE, THIS IS WHY I CHANGED IT!! A NAME LIKE TOMAS GIVES ME RESPECT!!
  • Count Winnipeggus: Sorry, it's just, if you wanted respect, do it in a way that doesn't paint you as a guy stealing the name of a heroic crusader dragon. Plus, YOU STOLE HIS NAME?!? YOU DO KNOW THAT ALL THOSE DRAGONS ARE STILL ALIVE, RIGHT?! IT HASN'T EVEN BEEN THAT LONG SINCE THE CRUSADES!!! YOU'RE GOING TO ATTRACT BAD ATTENTION TO ME!!
  • Tomas: Look, Tomas is a Spanish equivalent to Thomas, okay?! It's not an uncommon name. In fact, names like Jesus or Adolf aren't uncommon either. When you have a name like that, of COURSE people are going to take it badly. LIKE ME! I didn't technically STEAL it since it's a common name. So, we're safe.
  • Count Winnipeggus:... Ugh! Don't EVER scare me like that again... (Scoffs) Gaylord! (He burst into laughter)
  • Tomas: ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!? Well, say goodbye to this fairy sale, MISTER!
  • Count Winnipeggus: NONONO, SORRY, IT'S JUST, I HAD TO LET IT OUT! Ahem. Look, let's just get this smuggling business over with, and hopefully before this Helheim finishes his job. I want to be able to at least make enough profit that can survive that ape's prices!
  • Tomas: "We'll worry about that when we start crossing that bridge, sir."

Later...

  • Icky: (They saw how different the Dragon Realms Amazon Rainforest was to the original, as it was an enchanted rainforest of magical creatures, seeing its beauty as this played)
01 "Life Is a Magic Thing" - Johnny Clegg

01 "Life Is a Magic Thing" - Johnny Clegg

  • Zoe: Meh.
  • Iago: MEH?!?
  • Zoe: Um, when you live in this paradise, you get used to it.
  • Iago A-... Okay, good point. But still, you're lucky, your highness.
  • Zoe: Well, when you're STILL recovering from the 2019 Magic Fritz, AND the one who caused it said magic was for idiots, you don't seem to get into it as you should.
  • Icky:... (Sighs) I know we say this a lot, but, THANKS A LOT, STAR!!
  • Iago: So, aren't you glad you got this beauty back?
  • Zoe: Buddy, this is only the tip of the iceberg. What you saw was NOTHING compared to what the Fairy Realms TRULY is. In fact, this scenery is poultry compared to what we can have!
  • Icky: "I would imagine that's saying a lot since you reacted to all this as if it was "Oh-Hum" typical!"
  • Zoe: Well, when you've seen it all, it makes ruling the land easier.... I've had to play it serious since my parents died in the Great Cleansing. I had to watch my parents die when I was keeping the Fairy Realms together. If that wasn't bad enough, we had little to work with since everything was changed. We went to poverty, and, well, the smuggler problem Spyro, Cynder, and... The other guy, had to deal with came.... When you're the leader, you can't even waste time on love. That, and we fairies have our dignity.
  • Iago:... Well, if it's any consolation, your home is pretty. Almost as pretty as you.
  • Zoe: I get that a lot.
  • ???: GUYS! (Two fairies appeared)
  • Zoe: Persephone?! Calliope?!
  • Icky: Wait, these two, escaped?!
  • Zoe: They ARE the leaders of my royal mage guard. They defended us well in the war against Malefor.
  • Persephone: And you would not BELIEVE what I have been through TONIGHT!

Cutaway

  • Thug: Wow. You're pretty.
  • Persephone: Yeah yeah, pretty fairy, blah blah, just get us out of here, big guy.
  • Thug:... Well... I would, but boss's orders. But... Maybe we can work something out. I can blow you guys out with a spell... But you must help me with some relief.
  • Persephone: WHA, GROSS! NO WAY, NO HOW, WE FAIRIES HAVE OUR DIGNITY!!
  • Thug: No boom-boom, no, BOOM-boom!
  • Persephone:... And what's to stop us from buzzing away?
  • Thug: I just gotta scream and you'll be in enchanted nets quickly.
  • Persephone:...
  • Calliope: Ugh!
  • Persephone:...

Present

  • Persephone: I had to bathe for HOURS!!
  • Calliope: Me too!!
  • Icky: I feel so sorry for you two.
  • Persephone: Don't take pity on me. We've had to do WORSE!... MUUUCH, WOOOORSE!!!
  • Calliope: And for a small creature, you do NOT want us to name all of them.
  • Iago: OKAY, TOO MUCH INFO! AT LEAST YOU GUYS ARE OKAY!
  • Thug: (He peeked out) JUST KIDDING!!
  • Persephone: JEEZAHH!!!
  • Thug: THIS'LL COVER-UP OUR SILLY DEAL!! AHAHAHA! Winnipeggus won't have my head for this when I- (Suddenly, something shot him to the ground from behind, revealing himself to be an ape' like Gaul)
  • Iago: "..... Did we, just got rescued by Gaul?"
  • Ape: "Can you kindly NOT confuse me for my brother?! I no longer want anything to do with his crazed intentions for Malefor!"
  • Icky: "Wait, Gaul's you're bro? Gaul had a brother? Did Spyro and Cynder knew this?"
  • Iago: "Well I'm sure the subject would've come up long ago, so I assume NOT!"
  • Ape: "Perhaps proper introductions are in order. I, am Helheim the Gore Master."
  • Icky: "Subtle."
  • Helheim: "Hey, it's about presentation as a mercenary. Anyway, I was hired by a Thieves Guilder that was working with this fool's superior to capture the queen and her scribe. But in light that the idiot caused two additional fairies to escape and that the Lougers' clowns are involved.... Well, just an extra reason to add to the price of my services, especially since Count Winnipeggus is a very rich black marketer."
  • Icky: "Ugh, figures you only killed this dumbass so ya can make easy payments."
  • Helheim: "Hey, don't take it personally. I'm a mercenary. I'm not legally allowed to question the ethics of temporary employers. Believe me, I did favors for, worse people than a black market pet-trader parrot, and sometimes for less."
  • Iago: "Not exactly a very noble life."
  • Helheim: "WELL THANKS TO MY BROTHER'S STUPIDITY, IT'S NOT LIKE I CAN GET A NORMAL JOB?! Apes have a hated reputation in this world."
  • Icky: "Well it's not helping your bro and his guys are with the Villain League, so-"
  • Helheim: NOT ALL APES SERVE MALEFOR, YOU MORONS!!! The rest are still in our homeland of the Ape Kingdom. And THEY had to suffer Malefor's curse because of what MY brother and others did.
  • Iago: Wait... THEY'VE BEEN SKELETONS SINCE SPYRO AND CYNDER WENT INTO THAT TIME CRYSTAL?!?
  • Helheim:... You never noticed this... FOR ALL THESE YEARS?!?
  • Icky: Hey, we thought his magic was gone since he was defeated.
  • Helheim: And you never bothered to check?!
  • Iago:... I'm, tempted to say yes... But-
  • Helheim: "(Angerly) IIIIIIII?! (Icky and Iago got scared as they hid behind the fairies)...... (Sighs calming down)..... (Sadly) Can't blame you for your ignorance. I won't pretend that my brother didn't paint a false image for Ape kind. I'd imagined as far as you two or even Spyro and Cynder would care to know, that we apes are nothing but mindless savages that recklessly helped an evil dragon to be freed and contributed to the disastrous cleansing! I can't be mad at people for making assumptions."
  • Icky: "(Still frighten) Look, buddy, if it helps, we'll talk to the other Lougers about it and we'll work to fix it. I'm sure if Cynder and Spyro found out that not all apes are with yer bro, any pre-conceived notions will die faster then bugs vs. Raid!"
  • Helheim: "How can I trust that? Espeically to guys I just admitted that I only "helped" from this idiot to help myself and to be able to extend my price-range?"
  • Icky: All you had to do was ask. Plus, as a pretty scary bounty hunter, I'm sure that this Winnipeggus guy will betray you out of fear. Especially because ya killed one of his guys.
  • Helheim:... Well... I am no stranger to being betrayed out of fear, nor because of biting the hands that paid me.... Very well. I shall help you free the fairies.
  • Zoe: Seriously? It was THAT easy?!
  • Persephone: WHAT THE F***ATAUR?!?
  • Icky: "Hey, you ladies are about not being underestimated just because ya look adorable, right? Well just because me and Iago are no Shens or Spyros and Cynders, doesn't mean we're automatically the weak-links. Our best power is hijinks, and that these us-centric episodes always seem to give us villains that aren't exactly competent or narratively original and that we're able to guess what these guys would do at some point."
  • Zoe: ".... Well, then, in that case, I'm willing to say I'm actually impressed. I'm willing to believe that we're in good enough hands."
  • Icky: I hope so.

Meanwhile...

  • Count Winnipeggus: GET YOUR KIESTERS INTO GEAR, YOU BIG BITCHES!! TIME IS MONEY!! MONEY THAT YOU WON'T GET IF I DON'T SEE ALL THOSE FAIRIES IN THE TRUCK!!
  • Thug 1: "Wait, you mean we won't get time neither?"
  • Thug 2: "Holy crud, he's a time wizard!"
  • Tomas: ".... Ugghhhh, why is it that bad guys always have to have dumbasses on board?"
  • Count Winnipeggus: "Because smart henchmen think too much for themselves and bear a risk of a betrayal factor. Not to mention that dumb minions are cost-effective and cheaper. At this point, getting henchmen is like craigslist. It's SO hard to find smart henchmen these days. Henchlist isn't as popular on Mugshotra as it used to be in the golden days."
  • Tomas: I still feel like ya could've gotten better henchmen
  • Countwinnipeggus: Besides the point. ALRIGHT, GET THEM IN THE TRUCK, OR WE'LL GET PRETTY DIR... ANGRY!
  • Thug 1: Dirangry?
  • Tomas: Oh for f***'s sake! (Helheim was heard screeching and pounded his chest and jumped in freeing fairies all over the place)
  • Count Winnipeggus: WHAT THE- HELHEIM, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!? YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO GET THOSE LODGERS AWAY FROM US, NOT DO THEIR JOB FOR THEM!! IS THIS A MERCENARY TACTIC TO GET A HIGHER PAY?!
  • Helheim: "Actually, you don't have to worry about payment anymore! I've been convinced that your money isn't worth the trouble!"
  • Count Winnipeggus: ".... I want to say that's a relief, but considering you're freeing my new products in those fairies, I FEEL LIKE THIS ISN'T NESSERSARY A GOOD THING?!"
  • Tomas: "Ugh, hate it when the Lougers get into people's heads like this."
  • Count Winnipeggus: "MEN?! GET THE FAIRIES?!"
  • The Thugs clumsily try to catch the fairies but fail in spectacular ways!
  • Tomas: "..... Yeeeeeaaaaaahhh, I think it's time for me to return to the boss and warn him of this complication, uh, sorry count, but you're on yer own now. (Makes a run for it!)"
  • Count Winnipeggus: "WAIT?! I'M YOUR GUILD'S RICHEST BENEFACTOR?! DON'T LEAVE ME HERE?!"
  • Helheim: It's over, Winnipeggus!
  • Winnipeggus:... WHY?!? Why would you side with THEM?!
  • Helheim: You underestimate the true pain of us apes. The apes that followed my brother into the Villain League, brought the curse of Malefor upon my people. When you used to serve them but see Malefor's treachery before you suffer the curse, AND end up being one of the last uncursed apes in the Dragon Realms... How would YOU feel if THESE people offer to help your people? Apes have been discriminated, for what Gaul's forces did. That ends NOW! Starting with taking care of YOU!
  • Winnipeggus:... PLEASE tell me what Tomas said about not leaving without killing anyone is wrong.
  • Helheim: That was only a fabrication to strike fear in my enemies. I haven't killed a single soul since before the curse. And starting after one of your more pervy henchmen that tried to go back on making a deal to release two fairies in your capture-
  • Winnipeggus/Half of the other thugs: "DAMN IT, RONALD!!"
  • Helheim: -I never will again. You have no idea what it was like, to be one of the last uncursed apes since Malefor turned his back on us. I was able to avoid the same fate, and even my own kind turned me away. And after all that, Gaul and his dumb monkeys STILL serve him and the Villain League. Sure, he became less self-serving and more actually devoted to Malefor, BUT THAT MAKES IT WORSE?! Their greed and lust for power, is blind to what they suffered! I TRIED for years to get my brother back, but he is just too stubborn. Honestly, I'm not surprised. He was ALWAYS stubborn. Now because of that stubbornness, he's become the Apes' Public Enemy #1. At this point, he's DEAD to me.
  • Icky: Eh, I blame that on the darkness that he was bathed into.
  • Winnipeggus: STAY BACK! I'm warning you! You wouldn't hit a diabetic, would you?!
  • Iago: ".... Wow, you have diabetes, and yet you're working in the criminal underworld?"
  • Winnipeggus: "I was prone to eat entire bags of sugar in my youth."
  • Icky: "Yup, that'll do it! Well great, now we're at risk for feeling bad about being up someone with a health problem!"
  • Bubbles: "Watch this. (Snaps her fingers that does something to Winnipeggus)...."
  • Winnipeggus: "..... Wait, (Checks on the diabetes monitor) I, I don't believe it?! My Diabetes?! I'm cured?! IT'S A MIRACLE?! I'M CURED, I'M CURED, I'M- (Realises his situation)..... Uh-oh."
  • Iago: "And now we'll no longer feel so bad about kicking your ass."
  • Winnipeggus: "..... I'll, give everyone a free exotic pet? (They beat him up) WHAAAAAOW?!"
  • Iago: OH, LADIES?!? I think he and his morons would like to be escorted to prison.
  • Winnipeggus: NO WE WOULD NOT-
  • Iago: Too late! Buh-bye! (They were escorted away by the fairies)
  • Persephone: SO LONG, JACKHOLES!!! (Chuckles)
  • Icky: "Well, apart from Tomas running off, I think this is a mission well done."
  • Bubbles: "Weeeeeellll, yes and no. As you would imagine, we're not the only nation having problems with the Thieves Guild."
  • Icky: "Figures. So are we going to do a tour of the planet then?"
  • Zoe: "Well, give or take "We" as in, you guys. You two are gonna need to visit the other lands to help with their problems as well. And I can't promise they'll be as bone-headed as Winnipeggus turned out to be, espeically since Tomas escaped and WILL tell Master Thief of this."
  • Icky: "Fair enough, this IS the start of the episode after all. No problem, folks. Me and Iags got the message. The Icky and Iago world tour, IS ON!"
  • The duo flew off as the fairies and Helheim watch them leave....
  • Zoe: ".... They forgot to ask me about which nation has problems."
  • Icky's voice: "Don't worry, we read the description, we know what the Plot wants us to go to!"
  • Bubbles: "..... Wow. We were just rescued, by two birdbrains."
  • Zoe:... Ugh, I HATE being a cartoon.

Later...

  • Icky: So... How do we get to these other locations?
  • Iago: Hell if I know.
  • ???: TAKE YOUR STINKING HANDS OFF ME, DAMMIT! (A penguin was seen being escorted by thieves)
  • Penguin: DON'T YOU KNOW WHO I AM?!? I AM JAMESON BYRD JR!!! DO YOU KNOW WHO MY FATHER WAS?!?
  • Thief #1: Let me guess, Jameson Byrd Sr?
  • Thief #2: Wait, you mean the founder of Byrd Lands who died in the war against Malefor? WOW! That must be a DAMN shame to lose your pops like that. (The two laughed)
  • Byrd: EEERGGHH! When I get out of this and get my dad's DBX-9 rocket launchers and jet pack, I'LL BLOW YOU APART AND HAVE YOUR CHUNKS FOR SUPPER!!... Or just slap your bitch faces.
  • Thief #1: Gross.
  • Byrd: WE'VE EATEN WORSE IN THE MILITARY!!
  • Icky and Iago look at eachother....
  • Icky: ".... Ladies and gents? Our needed helper guy."
  • Byrd: "Just HOW did you scoundrels catch me so easily?! My location is always top secret?!"
  • ???: "(French Accent) Let's just say, (A Vulture in uniform came in) You messed with the wrong vulture, Byrd."
  • Byrd: "(Unsurprised but disappointed stare) La Vautour. I should've figured as much. Sad your failure to let go what happened in the academy drove you to benefit thieves of all people."
  • Vautour: " LE SILENCE?! You have stolen the most beautiful hummingbird from me and got to be with the most beautiful girl in the academy?!"
  • Byrd: "For goodness sake man, she didn't even KNEW you were into her! You were always reclusive!"
  • Vautour: "I'll have none of your excuses?! Now, hand me the secret plans for making a lamp that can't be wished free from?! Master Thief would pay handsomely having those plans destroyed?!"
  • Byrd: "And disappoint Senator Tricorn? Vau, you know I don't like being a disappointment."
  • Vautour: "Oh, is that why you try to live up to the legacy of your father? That Penguin stood up to the monsters of Le Malefor, even at the cost of life?! You? You could barely handle two robed midgets!"
  • Thief 1: "We have names ya know."
  • Byrd: "Hey, in my defense, you cheated in that front by alarming them of my location! I wasn't supposed to be caught!"
  • Vautour: "Well now, you will be another name in the defeat-pile of history, as now the Lougers easing from always being present in the Dragon Realms, is at an end!"
  • Vautour was hit with a pebble!"
  • Icky's voice: "We're happy enough to have Shen work something out so this place doesn't turn into a sticky-finger playground, corpse-breath?!"
  • Icky and Iago charged as the swooped by the surprised Thieves and Vautour!
  • Vautour: "GAAAAH?! MEN?! (Soldier Dogs appeared) SHOOT THEM DOWN?!"
  • The Soldier Dogs began firing at where Icky and Iago are' as the duo kept dodging!
  • Iago: "We probably should've done a better plan?!"
  • Icky: "Yeah, but at least it's good to know that bad guys inherently are bad shots!"
  • Soldier Dog 1: "(He and others were comedically firing the guns at random and comedic directions) Man these birds are elusive?!"
  • Vautour: "..... WHAT ARE YOU FOOLS DOING?! THAT IS NOT WHAT WE COVERED IN TRAINING?!" (They accidentally shot Byrd's cage open, freeing him)... (He shot them both dead) DAMN HENCHLIST!!
  • The Two Thieves made a run for it!
  • Byrd: (He got a high-tech rocket-launcher backpack and jet-pack on) Many thanks for your contribution, great and noble birds.
  • Iago: Hey, alot of that were the dumb mutts being dumb mutts, everything else is just part of being Birdbrains.
  • Byrd: Speaking of birdbrains, I got one to take care of!
  • Vautour: Zut alors! Uh, heheh, let's talk about this, Byrd. It, it wasn't anything personal.
  • Byrd: Regardless, kidnapping the commander-in-chief of the Byrd Lands is a seriously punishable crime. NOBODY, f***s around with MY dad's land and lives to tell about it. NOBODY!
  • Vautour:... Uh... Mommy? (He was blasted into the sky cartoonishly with his rocket launchers)
  • Icky: Wow! Good for him he can fly.... Right?
  • Byrd: No idea. Never seen him do it. But it's his loss. Hello, worthy heroes. Sergeant James Byrd Jr. Commander of the military in the Byrd Lands of Antarctica, at your service.
  • Icky: "Antarctica? But, that guy referenced Humming Birds, how does that make sense?"
  • Byrd: "Our HQ insides are warm and very greenhouse-like."
  • Icky: "Okay, fair enough."
  • Byrd: "Well, pity those Thief accomplices of Vautour got away before they got their fair share of justice. No matter, when I ensure the plans for a lamp that can't be wished free from are safe within HQ, those two will regret their cowardice soon enough."
  • Icky: "Ya don't mind if we help ya out, do ya? I suspect Frenchy will come back for round 2 and will try to get more guys after us!"
  • Byrd: "Normally I'd be strict about outside assistance, but one, you two are of the Lougers, and 2, you said a very valid point. The reinforcement is welcomed, gentlemen."
  • Icky: Well, let's get cold... Not the way I wanted that to come out.

Chapter 2: The Indestructible Lamp Project/Byrd Lands/A Thing About Yetis

Unknown Area.

  • Master Thief: "HOLY CRUD, TOMAS, REALLY?!"
  • Tomas: "I'm sorry Boss, but it's true! Those birdbrains ruined the black market pet trade!"
  • Master Thief: ".... AND YOU DIDN'T STAY TO HELP THE BENEFACTOR?!"
  • Tomas: "Well, Helheim turned unprofessionally traitor, and-"
  • Master Thief: "ZIP IT, TOMMY!! Ya just lost my respect! Gee, I got ya another practice dummy for ya! He's EXTRA STUPID!"
  • Tomas: "Sir, please, we need to warn the other benefactors?!"
  • Master Thief: "NO! We're keeping quiet about this! I don't want the operation to fall apart because even if only TWO Lodgers are on their case! We're sticking to the plan! GEE, YA COMING?! YOUR NEW PRACTICE DUMMY'S NOT FRYING HIMSELF!??
  • Tomas: "No, no please?! BOSS?! BOSS?!"
  • Gee Nee: (She zapped him from behind, turning him into a frog)... HAHA! Ah, that never gets old.
  • Master Thief: Hehe, you sneaky little snake.
  • Gee Nee: Oh, MT, you flatterer. (The two kissed) So, the fairy trade was a big flop, huh?
  • Master Thief: Yeah, basically. Dang shame, cause it looked like Winnipeggy would've made a killing buck with those bug-winged people! But hopefully, they won't know about those plans for an indestructible genie lamp that you can't free a genie from.
  • Gee Nee: Exactly! Glad we captured the ONLY person in the world who knows about it. If that lamp is allowed to be created, we genies, with our phenomenal cosmic power, will be threatened by an itty-bitty inescapable and unwishable living space. Genies will be threatened by it's existence. Even the freed ones. And not just from heroes against rogue free genies, but those who want to enslave genies for their own selfish needs. That lamp is as dangerous as it is useful.
  • Master Thief: Hopefully, that penguin will be in our custody faster than you can say- (He answered his iPhone that buzzed in the tone of a burglary alarm as he looked at it)... WHAT?!?... Okay, I'll call you back. (He hung up)
  • Gee Nee:... Honey, PLEASE tell me that penguin hasn't been found by the Lodgers. PLEASE tell me my freedom and those of free genies, good or bad, haven't just been put in danger!
  • Master Thief:... I wish I could.
  • Gee Nee:... RaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!! (Her screams were so powerful, her omnipotent power raged throughout the place getting everyone inside to take cover, while those who couldn't in time were magically transformed into random things) GOOD GRIEFING MARLARKEY, AND JUST WHEN THINGS WERE LOOKING UP!?
  • Master Thief: "Hey, it's bad for me too! On top of the atypical stuff like the Guild being more at risk of disbansion and a serious one at that with permanent endgames, I could lose you as well! I can handle being another defeated schmoe on the Lougers' list of defeated schmoes, but I can't handle losing you in the process! I'm gonna make sure Vau-head gets the message he needs to take things seriously now!"
  • Gee Nee: "HE BETTER, OR HE'S GONNA KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE A CHICKEN AT KFC?!"
  • Master Thief: "Better! I'm gonna make sure to send the Espionage Specialist his way!"

Vautour's HQ.

  • Vautour was on the medical bay as doctors treated his sustained injuries.
  • Doctor 1: "At least you can say you survived what you went through."
  • Vautour: "Ugghhhh. I need to be able to go after that blasted Byrd and those two new pests of his! But if only I were not a mortal and bound to mortal limitations!"
  • ???: "Your problem is that you were too blunt about it."
  • A Gecko in spy spandex appeared from nowhere, surprising and freaking out remaining Soldier Dogs!
  • Vautour: "DAH?! WHO ARE YOU?!"
  • Gecko: ".... I go by the name of the Deadly Silence. Mercenary Espionager for hire. A Thieves Guild Member sent me here."
  • Vautour: ".... I take it Master Thief has been, unsatisfied with the incursion?"
  • DS: "Would I even be here if he wasn't bothered by your failure to stop something that's guaranteed to backfire on them once Gee Nee's out of the picture?"
  • Vautour: "Ah, oui-oui, admittingly that was a stupid question."
  • Soldier Dog Officer: "Hey, lizard, ya weren't supposed to be in- (DS began to beat the crap about of the Officer and smacked him right into another bed)...."
  • Doctor 2: "Oh great, another higher-up incapacitated."
  • Vautour: ".... Ordinarily, I complain about attacking guys on the same team, but, given how much these dogs failed to take down TWO JOKER BIRDBRAINS, I find you to be a long-needed improvement."
  • DS: "Well obviously I'm not some cheap thug from Henchlist."
  • Vautour: "Well, while I heard of your talents, going into the Humming Bird base is expected to be difficult! They're no stranger to attempted Espionagers."
  • DS: "..... Then wait until I visit that base. The next time you'll hear about this "Unwishable Lamp", it'll be an addition to a documentary series about failed and rejected ideas. Cause I imagine that the creator of the lamp, Dr. Julien B. Itchwish, would have hidden motivations behind this lamp and that the Thieves Guild's advantage with a freed Genie is nothing more than an excuse to get an otherwise questionable project approved. If I were to expose this to the Lougers, well, you can count on those misfits no longer feeling safe with the idea of the lamp."
  • Vautour: ".... Ah-haaaa, and Byrd will feel like an embarrassment for adhering to this! BRILLIANT?!"
  • DS: "Oh, and one other thing:.... Thief and Gee also asked me to, sever ties between their group and you."
  • Vautour: "(Frowns).... Wha?"
  • DS: "He felt like you're no longer an adequate threat to Byrd, especially in your state. So I made it that your hidden base was as obvious as possible to even the dumbest enforcer ever. (The Base was covered in Vegasy Neon-Lights) Expect Tri-Corn's finest soldiers to arrive shortly. (Suddenly disappears)....."
  • Vautour: "..... LT? How, long until enemy arrival?"
  • LT: "(Gulps)..... Do you, want to hear those words exactly?"
  • Vautour: YES!
  • LT:... In approximately 1 second- (Tricorn's forces appeared as they cartoonishly ran around and surrounded them)
  • Trooper #1: Do not attempt to move, or we'll be repeating the 'do not attempt to move or we'll be shooting ourselves' joke!
  • Trooper Leader: ".... Ehh, it's different, at the least."
  • Vautour: "..... Just so you all know, I surrender, it's just that my body is casted up and I'm not able to do the surrender gesture!"
  • Trooper 2: "Yeah we kinda figured as much."

Byrd Lands

  • Byrd:... Yes, I have met Spyro and Cynder.
  • Icky: We, never asked that.
  • Byrd: You were thinking it. Soldier's intuition. They arrived when we were attending father's funeral. My father, Jameson Byrd, founded these lands and fought well against Malefor's forces when he was freed. But the Grublins were just too powerful. Then when he finally handled the entire army, Malefor had initiated the Great Cleansing, and he died rescuing as many penguins as he could. The ice of our home was somehow solid enough to stay formed even when the Destroyer split the world into pieces. The hummingbirds assumed it was because of magic, which would explain it.... Spyro and Cynder, and their dragonfly friend Sparx, arrived when we were holding the funeral. I took his DBX-9 firework backpack cannons and managed to upgrade them with some nifty Mega-Sci Corp technology. Now they're rocket launchers.
  • Iago:... So, can you fly?
  • Byrd: Without my jetpack, no. Why do you ask?
  • Icky: One, there's a different version of you, erm well, your father in technically, from a different iteration. He could fly.
  • Byrd:... Ohhh, you must mean like with father's hummingbird foster care. Yes, indeed, he could fly because of it. I don't know how that makes any sense, but magic ice, I guess. Guess you must've heard about my dad differently to misinterpret it as some 'timeline' stuff.
  • Iago:... Okay, whatever, point is, what thief problems are going on in the hummingbird lands?
  • Byrd: Well, the hummingbird lands aren't exactly IN Antarctica. It's on some green islands nearby Antarctica across the shores of the Byrd Lands.
  • Icky: I thought you said they had HQ greenhouses.
  • Byrd: Where do you think they CAME from, you ninnies?
  • Icky: Ah, makes sense.
  • Byrd: Also, we built our HQs under the ices of Antarctica.
  • Icky:... I GUESS that makes additional sense? But hey, if something like Lake Vostok can exist in Antarctica, anything is possible.
  • ???: SIIIR! SIRSIRSIRSIRSIRSIRSIRSIIIIIR!! (Another penguin came in) WE'RE IN SOME DEEP S***!!
  • Byrd: Speaking of 'Vostok', GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF, COLONEL VOSTOK! (He slapped him multiple times) Now, what is it?
  • Vostok: Sir, the hummingbirds at Vostok HQ have been taken.
  • Byrd: WHAT?!? EVEN GABRIELLE?!?
  • Vostok: ESPECIALLY GABRIELLE!!
  • Byrd: UGH! WHAT DO I PAY YOU FOR?!?
  • Vostok: You're not the one who pays us, sir.
  • Byrd: UGH, WHAT DO YOU LIVE FOR?!?
  • Icky: Gabrielle?
  • Byrd: My hummingbird girlfriend. And, um, this is Colonel Ross Vostok, commander of the Vostok Headquarters. He was SUPPOSED to be safehousing the hummingbirds in all my HQs, but obviously he failed dramatically.
  • Vostok: I AM STILL A ROOKIE SINCE MY FATHER DIED IN THE SAME SITUATION AS YOURS, SIR!
  • Byrd: THAT'S NO EXCUSE, COLONEL! NOW MY LODGER ASSOCIATES MUST GET THEM BACK WHILE I BREAK THE BAD NEWS TO THE HUMMINGBIRD ISLANDS! YOU shall fill them in on the situation while I'm gone.
  • Vostok: YES SIR!!
  • Icky: "Oy, it's always something. So I guess this means Vautour's back for round 2."
  • Byrd: "No, this doesn't match Vautour in the slightest. Vostok would not be able to tell us for one thing, as Vautour lets no one go uncaptured in HIS raids. This was done by someone who's a mastermind and knows what they're doing."
  • Icky: But who?
  • Byrd: How should I know? I mean, they struck when I was captured. They knew that my absence would leave them unable to be at their best. Vautour was only an accomplice.
  • Iago: Well that f*****g figures.
  • Vostok: Come with me! We must get the Hummingbird Division back. (They left as Byrd flew off with his jetpack)

Vostok Headquarters

  • Penguin Guard:... Do these people have special clearance?
  • Vostok: Captain Beek, these are members of the Lodgers. Let us in, as your commanding officer!
  • Beek:... Sorry, sir, it's just... Not much has been the same in 11 years since your father died.
  • Vostok: (Sighs) Really, Beek?
  • Beek: I NEVER SAID THAT IT WAS A QUICK CHANGE! I'VE BEEN SERVING YOUR FATHER FOR MUCH LONGER THAN 11 YEARS!!
  • Vostok: DON'T TALK BACK TO ME, SOLDIER!
  • Beek:... Yeah, it was much more commanding when it was your father- (Vostok choked him) HUEGH!
  • Vostok: LET US IN!! THAT IS AN ORDER!!
  • Beek:... Okay, that's MUCH better! Keep doing that, sir! (He opened the gates and the three entered to see many penguins cleaning up after a thief raid)
  • Penguin #2: SIR! YOU'RE BACK!
  • Vostok: Ahem. Major Sidley Feather, these are Lodgers, and they would like to assist us in rescuing the Hummingbird Division.
  • Feather: Oh. Well... That's convenient.
  • Icky: Convenience at this point is like a bully to us.
  • Feather: I know... Tell me about it.
  • Icky: So, um... What's the situation?
  • Feather: No offense, guys, but we take orders from Colonel Vostok.
  • Iago: Well... Can you, uh, 'Vos' him for us?
  • Vostok: Okay, let's make it clear I hate puns.
  • Icky: Eh, everyone does, AND it's a one-time thing. RIGHT?!
  • Iago: Yeah, sure.
  • Vostok: But very well. What's the situation?
  • Feather: Well, yesterday at 1845 hours, thieves have been reported sneaking about beneath our defenses. We did the best we could, but without Byrd, we lost all the Hummingbirds at 1900 hours.
  • Vostok: Wow. 15 minutes. That's got to be a record.
  • Iago:... Just 15 minutes? You guys really DO need our help.
  • Feather: I will escort you both to Commodore Blake Arctowski. He is our navigator, and should provide safe course for where we may believe they're hiding the hummingbirds.
  • Iago: Why would they even want those hummingbirds? It can't be for the same reason as the fairies.
  • Feather: "Well, it may be related to the Indestructible Lamp project, but other than that, I do see where you are going since I wouldn't put Humming Birds in the same camp as Fairies."
  • Vostok: (Was on his radio for a bit) Oh, crap! Guys? I think this move WAS because of the Lamp!
  • Feather:... What do you mean, sir?
  • Vostok: The Thieves are globally attacking for a reason. Many lands have... *Gulp*... COPIED the plans for the Indestructible Lamp.
  • Icky: WHAT?!
  • Vostok: Byrd just called, and... Hummingbird Island has been attacked by Gee Nee.... And the Hummingbirds want to stop the project now.
  • Iago: WHY?!? WITH IT, WE CAN IMPRISON A BAD FREE GENIE FOREVER!
  • Vostok: Apparently, Gee Nee said that she's been after this project for a reason. Yes, the lamp can be used to imprison evil free genies... But it can ALSO be used to imprison GOOD free genies.
  • Icky: What do you mean?
  • Vostok: Gee Nee is doing this not just for Master Thief, but for her own kind. The Indestructible Lamp is as dangerous as it is useful. If this lamp ever fell into the wrong hands, then all free genies, good or bad, could be enslaved and allow the user all the wishes he could want, with no limitation to three or the loophole of wishing for more wishes. All genies, INCLUDING her, could be threatened by this lamp's very existence.
  • Icky: I-...... Actually... That IS a good point.
  • Vostok: So the hummingbirds have... Hesitantly joined forces with the thieves to ensure that all copies of the lamp project are to be destroyed. Anyone who possesses this lamp could become unstoppable, and with a lamp that's indestructible and permanently imprisons genies forever... There's no freeing them OR destroying the owner's power.
  • Icky: Ohhh boy! Foiled by logic, AGAIN!
  • Vostok: I, I don't understand! Even if this IS a good point, this is STILL no reason to-
  • Iago: You know what: Who cares? We need to destroy the project copies, as soon as possible. If this thing is as dangerous as it is useful, then it shouldn't exist.
  • Vostok: Isn't that what Gee Nee wants?
  • Iago: Yes... But, she AND Master Thief ARE still a threat, so Gee Nee STILL needs to be imprisoned some way or another.
  • Icky: Evil genies are STILL a threat. Especially FREE ones. If there's ANYTHING Jafar AND Merlock taught us, genies that are more enslaved than they already are when bound by their lamps, AND are given different methods of getting past the classic three-wish rule, this time by switching genies every time one has granted three already, are dangerous.
  • Vostok: So, you're saying we should make a destructible version of this lamp, especially for Gee Nee?
  • Feather: Seems the most likely reason to destroy these plans. Manufacturing lamps that can capture free genies and put them back into eternal servitude, seems like a much better solution.
  • ???: It's worse! (Another penguin came)
  • Iago: Who dis?
  • Vostok: Our military scientist Mawson Chilingarov.
  • Mawson: Ahem, glad to meet you, as I was saying, I just got a call from the Professor.
  • Icky: Professor?
  • Vostok: Professor Joule of Mega-Sci Corp. The guy who made our high-tech equipment.
  • Mawson: Precisely. He just called and said that his colleague Dr. Julien B. Itchwish's plans for the lamp, were stolen.
  • Icky and Iago snickered at that name.
  • Mawson: "..... THIS IS TOO SERIOUS TO LAUGH AT DR. ITCHWISH'S NAME!!" (He slaps them both)
  • Icky: Ahem! Sorry, sorry! Also, if these two lab guys are so smart, then how did they lose those plans so easily-
  • Mawson: Ahem. MASTER thieves?
  • Icky: Whatever, point taken.
  • Mawson: Anyway, as you can guess, it was an artificial way to stop rogue free genies. But when he realized the danger that such a device can pose, he went to his superiors to cancel the project... Only to find such plans stolen.
  • Icky: "I'm betting Itchwish wasn't all likewise with the professor on this."
  • Mawson: We don't know if this is Itchwish's fault yet! But, he said he's just been working on plans for a better version. Lamps that can lock rogue free genies back into their original purpose and add a new 4th wish that you can't free them if they haven't been good or honorable genies.
  • Iago: Now THAT'S what I'm talking about.
  • Icky: DEFINITELY the greater reason why Gee Nee wants to stop any attempt to create these artificial lamp prisons. She's just trying to save her own kind, good or bad.
  • Iago: AND her boyfriend is on her side because he doesn't want to lose her.
  • Icky: Alright, we got everything clear here? Is there anything we're missing?
  • (Byrd): EMERGENCY!! EMERGENCY!! THIS IS SERGEANT BYRD!! I HAVE BEEN CAPTURED BY THE HUMMINGBIRDS!! GEE NEE HAS BRAINWASHED THEM TOO WELL TO LISTEN TO ME FOR A BETTER SOLUTION!! ITCHWISH HAS GONE ROGUE AND- AAHHHH- (The signal cuts)
  • Iago:... So... We're going to that island-
  • Vostok: No! His orders were to have you rescue Gabrielle and the Hummingbird Division. We'll send a squad over to save him.
  • Iago: Well, no need to, cause me and Icks are gonna go help Byrd.
  • Icky and Iago flew off!
  • Vostok: "WAIT! WE NEED ALL THE HELP WE CAN-"
  • Feather: "Let them go, Vos. If they save Byrd, rescuing the division will be made easier with Byrd's help."
  • Vostok: ".... Uggggh. Okay, fine! We'll improvise in the meantime then! But if this decision gets me demoted, I'm blaming you!"

Itchwish's lab

  • Byrd: Itchwish, how could you do this?
  • Itchwish: "JOULE BETRAYED ME AND TURNED AGAINST MY DREAM?! I AM NOT GONNA LET MY DREAM DIE BECAUSE A GECKO ESPIONAGER SUDDENLY MESSED WITH EVERYONE'S MORALE?!"
  • Byrd: Look, I know it's inconvenient, but, they're right. Something like this can be dangerous.
  • Itchwish: YOU THINK I WOULDN'T PLAN AHEAD FOR SOMETHING LIKE THAT?!
  • Byrd: And YOU think they won't recreate it for THEIR needs?
  • Itchwish: WHAT IS WRONG WITH EVERYBODY?!? I TRY TO MAKE SOMETHING TO HELP, AND SUDDENLY PEOPLE ARE TRYING TO STOP ME!! I DON'T CARE IF IT'S DANGEROUS!
  • Byrd: THAT'S exactly the problem!
  • Itchwish: WELL, SCREW YOU! I worked so hard on this, and I REFUSE to let it go to waste! I'm getting them back, end of story! I will not allow the creation of something that can help society permanently harness the power of genies be lost FOREVER because of meager concerns and ignorance?!"
  • Byrd: ".... So I take it taking away the Thieves Guild's trumpcard is just something you're using as an excuse to get a risky idea off the ground then? Honestly, I kinda figured, cause it does sound risky in hindsight-"
  • Itchwish: "SILENCE?! I can't believe my fellow hummingbirds had EVER saw pity in you, much less others! Your father wouldn't've backed out so easily?!"
  • Byrd: ".... I believe you know nothing about who my father really was. And I don't appreciate such a misguided accusation, good doctor."
  • Itchwish: "SILENCE?! I will not let you free until my demands to get my plans back in working order are met! I have ways to make Tricorn kneel to my demands?!"
  • Byrd: Look, I'm sorry your plans were scoffed off as dangerous. But it is. Can you imagine if someone evil got their hands on this kind of thing? No genies, free or not, good or evil, will be safe. They could be imprisoned in such a device and-
  • Itchwish: SCIENCE IS ALL ABOUT RISKS?! It is about venturing into new territories and heights?! As soon as I make that lamp, Gee Nee will be the first one to go.
  • Byrd: Then you're just as dangerous as she is.
  • Itchwish: (Sighs) You don't understand. Ever since I was nearly killed during the Great Cleansing, I have always feared omnipotent power like that. I dedicated my life's work to create counters to their power. THIS is one of them. If you have a problem with this, then you're ASKING for history to repeat itself.
  • Byrd: The opposite actually, I'm trying to KEEP history from repeating itself. It's fine and dandy you meant good for this thing, but, what can be used against it, can be used to empower it. Joule was in the right for having your project canceled. An indestructible lamp that genies can never be freed from? Can you IMAGINE how dangerous that is?
  • Itchwish: ENOUGH! I'm NOT stopping for ANYTHING!
  • Byrd: Then, like I said, you ARE as dangerous as Gee Nee.
  • Itchwish: And who's going to stop me- (Suddenly he was shot with a sniper from DS)
  • Byrd:... W... WHAT THE HECK?!? I don't recall anyone from the base who can use a sniper rifle?!
  • DS snuck off into the shadows....
  • Byrd: ".... Well, this is troubling. Itchwish got assassinated, and I made the mistake of asking all team members and the Lougers to prioritized helping the Humming Bird division. I don't suppose it can't be worse."
  • Computer: "Itchwish's life force lost. Engage 20-minute self-destruction sequence."
  • Byrd: ".... OH WHY WOULD ANYONE HAVE A SELF-DESTRUCTION MECHANISM THAT ACTIVATES THE MOMENT YOU DIED?! Oy, sometimes science can befodled me."
  • Computer: 20-minute self-destruction, disabled.
  • Byrd: Oh, thank Go- Wait, what? (A mole scientist appeared)... Joule!
  • Joule: Come on! Everyone here need help.
  • Byrd: Right! (He got his gear back) Hold on, Professor! (He held Joule and they blasted off with his jetpack but ended up running into Icky and Iago) OOF?! Wait, Lougers? I take it you were attempting to be an impromptu rescue team?
  • Icky: "..... We, ended up being un-needed, did we?"
  • Byrd: "Worry not gents, it's the thought at counts. Besides, gives you two more opportunity to help Vostok and the rescue attempt that you were meant to focus on."
  • Iago: "But what about that Itchwish jerk?"
  • Byrd: "Unplanned casualty of this conflict I'm afraid. I suspect this "Gecko" he was raving about may had something to do with it, granted, I didn't see this assailant myself."
  • Icky: "Yeesh, this guild must REALLY be against that plan of his, aren't they?"
  • Byrd: Indeed.
  • Joule: Come. As soon as we rescue the hummingbirds, we can discuss the next few lands the copies are.
  • Iago:... Great! Didn't need to break the fourth wall to know that. That's just swell to know. DAMN!
  • Icky: We all make mistakes. LET'S GO! (They head out)

Thief Den

  • Gabrielle: LA CONFUSION!!! YOU RUFFIANS LET US GO IMMEDIATELY!
  • Thief #1: Or what, buzzy?
  • Gabrielle: IT'S COMMODORE GABRIELLE TO YOU, CONNARD!!
  • Thief #1: My name is NOT Connard! In fact, that's hardly even a name.
  • Thief #2: It's French for 'asshole', genius.
  • Thief #1: OH YOU LITTLE BITCH!!
  • Gabrielle: BYRD WILL COME FOR ME!
  • Thief #1: Oh, we've taken GOOD care of him. He was last reported being in Ishwish's mercy, and-
  • DS: "(Shows up) I take it you're not familiar with Gee's request to had Ishwish eliminated then?"
  • Thief 1: ".... AW WHAT THE F, DUDE?! NOW HE'S GONNA COME HERE AND KICK OUR BUTTS?!"
  • DS: "He doesn't have to. Kidnapping these Humming Birds was meant to be a distraction for the Lougers and Byrd's troop while Gee goes after the information relating to the plans and where to go after them, along with having Ishwish vulnerable to be finished off so there would be no way for his original plans to be revived."
  • Thief 2: ".... Ohhh, okay. So let ditch these buzzers and-"
  • DS: "Not yet. We'll need to put an extra distraction so I would have time to pin-point where the plans are. So, I hired some Ice Scavengers to hold the hummers over for us."
  • A Couple of Scavengers similar to the ones from the second Legend of Spyro game but ice-themed showed up, along with a big one simular to Skabb, but actually looks intelligent.
  • Thief 1: ".... Holy crud?! You got THE Dread Captain Frostbytebeard in on this?!"
  • Captain Frostbytebeard: "(Sofisicated voice) Oh please, do call me Icenguard. "Frostbytebeard" is only a surname."
  • Thief 2: ".... Wow, strangely polite for a scavenger."
  • Captain Icenguard: "Did you peg me to be like Cousin Skabb and his little pets? Oh please, I'm better than that. (As A pet Puffin-Eqsed Creature and a Snow-Owl Eqsed Creature sitting on him as well). My scavengers have a more luxurious career in collecting and keeping the rarest creatures and legendary beings of the Dragon Realms. And it so happens that I am currently searching, for the abominable snowmen brothers. DS had came to me about these hummingbirds, and I do believe they will be very fruitful in helping me to add the brothers into my collection?"
  • Gabrielle: "WE HAVE MORE IMPOURENT THINGS TO WORRY ABOUT THEN CHASING CRYPTIDS?!"
  • Captain Icenguard: "Oh? Well, terribly sorry dear.... But I don't believe this was a request. It is what the military would call, a draft."
  • The Ice Scavengers laughed as they surrounded the Humming Bird Division.

Later.

  • The Thief Den was empty when Vostok's team broke in!
  • Vostok: "FREEZE?! SURRENDER THE HUMMING- (Say the empty den).... Birds....."
  • Suddenly, a bathroom flush was heard, as a Thief in Red Robes came out humming.
  • Red Robed Thief: "Okay dudes, sorry I was late, bathroom accident. Now what are we gonna do with the Humming Bir- (Saw Penguins) Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr........ MEEP?! (Goes back into the bathroom to look it!)"
  • Vostok: "..... SECURE THAT RED IDIOT?!" (They fired madly breaking the door down)...
  • Red Robed Thief:... I'm out of here. (He zoomed off in Spyro thief speed)
  • Beek: GET HIM! (They slid after him)
  • Icky: (He, Iago and Byrd arrived just in time to see the Red Robed Thief being chased) COME BACK HERE, YOU RED LITTLE C**K!!!
  • Red Robed Thief: "LEAVE ME, I'M A ROOKIE?! I DIDN'T EVEN GET STARTED YET?! (Keeps running)"
  • Byrd: "Oy, you would think an organization as netouriously organized as the Thief's Guild would keep a better grip on their rookies." (They chased him around comically until they ended up getting him to fall off a cliff and into the freezing water, freezing him cartoonishly into a block of ice and capturing him)
  • Iago: Alright, ya blood-soaked little troglodyte. You're going to spill everything you know or we'll shove an icicle up your ass.
  • Icky: Whoa, Iago.
  • Iago: Give me a break, I'm freezing out here!
  • Red Robed Thief: "(Muffled) Too, frozen, to talk."
  • Byrd: "Ohhh, bother. Guess we'll have to take him back to base for questioning then."

Base

  • Byrd: (The thief was unfrozen and quickly immobilized_... NOW you're going to spill everything you know or we really WILL shove an icicle up your ass.
  • Red Robed Thief: " AHH?! Come on man, I'm litterally the new guy, don't make my first day ever be about me being a snitch?!"
  • Vostok: "Well, what's gonna be more impourent in this situation?! (Pulls out Icicle)...... A good standing, OR THE ABILITY TO SIT FOR THE FORESEEABLE FUTURE?!"
  • Red Robed Thief: "(Scared whimper)?! Listen, please, I, I was mostly in the bathroom for a long time cause of an, accident, I, I missed out on what happened out there."
  • Byrd: "Then make an educated guess, good sir, or I can't promise I'll reign in Vostok on any misconduct!"
  • Red Robed Thief: "(Scared yelp)?! Well if I had to guess, during my clean up that I was keeping SUPER-SECRET, I heard this conversation between two Ice Scavengers using the urinals! They mostly talked about something about their boss scoring hummingbirds to help him catch two legendary snow monkeys in thanks to that gecko that was used to bust up your indestructible lamp plans, I wasn't able to pay attention to much else cause I was too busy trying to hide my mess?! Maybe those hummingbirds got taken by Ice Scavengers, I don't know?!"
  • Byrd: "..... Icenguard. The collector of legends."
  • Icky: "Ice Scavengers? Ya mean like, those dog pirates with Skabb from the second Legend of Spyro Game?"
  • Byrd: "Icenguard is a far cry from his mentally challenged cousin. He's going to make our division go after untested legends and myths."
  • Icky: "Weeeeeeeeeeell, me and Iago saw Bigfoot on that camping adventure with Non-Kingdom Hearts Goofy that one time, sooooo, Abominable Snowmen may not be a stretch."
  • Vostok: "..... Okay reddy, while we're on the subject, EXPOSE THE THIEVES GUILD MAIN HQ, SO WE'LL KNOW WHAT TO TARGET?!"
  • Red Robed Thief: "(Strange magic was slightly occurring on him) No?! No please?! Don't ask me that?! You're messing with the failsafe?!"
  • Vostok: "I'M SERIOUS YOU ROBE JOCKEY?! WHERE, IS, YOUR, MAIN, BASE?!"
  • Red Robed Thief: "(SCREAMS AS MORE OF THE MAGIC OCCURED AS HE TURNED INTO AN UNSENTIENT ANIMAL)......"
  • Vostok: "..... AW SHIT, IS THE GENIE BACK?!"
  • Joule: "Actually, it's something else.... It confirms a long-debated theory about the thieves guild:.... That all the thieves but Master Thief, are but direct byproducts of Gee Nee, that they were once normal animals until the events that transpired to turn them into Thieves."
  • Byrd: "And I take it what we witnessed was, a failsafe in an event any were to get interrogated and/or arrested so to prevent their main HQ being located."
  • Joule: "In a way."
  • Vostok: ".... Ugh, no wonder all the captured and arrested Thieves kept mysteriously disappearing and their cells "Replaced" with worthless unsentients! THEY LITTERALLY ARE THE UNSENTIENTS?! That, kinda explains their lack of identifiable features, honestly!"
  • Icky: "Well all the more reason to catch MT's genie girlfriend then! I bet capturing her would turn those Thieves back to their proper forms!"
  • Byrd: "Yes, but now our rescue mission for the Humming Birds is complicated now! Icenguard has likely left the area by know to go after his ridiculous claim of there being "Yeti Brothers" in the mountains! We'll need to rendezvous to the Ice Scavenger camp in the Himalayas where this crazed excavation is held!"
  • Icky: "Ya know this is likely a distraction tactic these thieves are using to make us focus on something not related to the mass crimes they're doing!"
  • Joule: Actually, it's not. THIS is one of the locations of the many copies of the lamp project.
  • Icky:... Well that changes everything. Now, where are these islands? I'm sure it's not a far walk.
  • Joule:... It's not in Antarctica.
  • Iago:...

Yeti Mountains

  • Icky:... Okay, I'm stupid, of COURSE it was the Himalayas. What did I EXPECT from Yetis?!
  • Joule: It's actually called the Yatī Pahāḍaharū. Or in-unrefined tongue, the Yeti Mountains.
  • Icky:... Wow. Too generic. We're just gonna call them the Himalayas.
  • Iago: "So how we're gonna find those Ice Scavengers?"
  • Byrd: "Well first off, just look for what looks like an ice-themed Airship parked at a side of the mountain. That would be where the camp is."
  • Icky: You mean THAT thing? (They saw a large airship similar to Skabb's ship parked at a relative distance from where the group are)
  • Byrd:... Okay, that CAN'T be it! There's NO way we conveniently stumbled upon it!
  • Iago: Well why don't we find out?
  • Byrd: FINE! (He fired his rocket launchers before Joule magnetized them back and detonated them far away)
  • Joule: They didn't mean it THAT way, Byrd. They meant in a subtle way. One that DOESN'T blow our cover. Nor risks the well being of the Humming Birds AND your girlfriend, millaterry training or not!
  • Iago: Yeah, some military leader.
  • Byrd: (He grabbed him as he squealed in fear) You wanna say that to my face, Polly?
  • Iago: N-n-n-n-no!
  • Byrd: Damn right now! (He let her go) Besides, I'm STILL new to this.
  • Icky: NEW?! IT'S BEEN 11 DAMN YEARS!!
  • Byrd: NOBODY SAID IT WAS QUICK!
  • Joule: EVERYONE, PLEASE, SHUT UP! (Echoes passed around and they got caught in an avalanche, getting them to scream all the way down until they got caved in by the snow)
  • Byrd:... Oh, way to go, guys.
  • Iago: Us? You were yelling too.
  • Byrd: There's no time to hold anyone accountable. Now we have to take the long way back up there.
  • ???: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!
  • Icky:... Please tell me that was just a snow leopard having a case of indigestion.
  • Iago: Has asking for things like that ever worked, idiot?
  • Icky: WELL IT'S BETTER THEN THE WORSE CASE SCENARIO?!
  • Byrd: Will you both quit it?! We have a LONG walk ahead of us here!
  • The Group ventured forth, unaware that they were watched by a large silhouette.

Ice Scavenger Camp.

  • Captain Icenguard: "(As the Ice Scavengers were preparing cages of various sizes and all kinds of weaponry)... I thank you for supplying weaponry, my good dealer."
  • A Pistol Shrimp with a literal pincher-gun was seen.
  • Pistol Shrimp: "Hey now, try to call me "Mr. Gunnery", I like to be friendly and personal with my clients."
  • Captain Icenguard: "Ah yes, Mr. Gunnery. Your weapons will be extremely helpful in capturing the Yeti Brothers. And at generous prices too."
  • Mr. Gunnery: "Hey, with the Lougers starting to take extra vacation time with that Kairi Thing down and out, well, suffice to say, alot of guys like us can feel like we can take more risks here. Besides, I already have plenty of high-paying clients that can cover the REALLY expensive stuff. You guys mainly wanted standard Ice Monkey catching things. That's cheaper compared to anything the AUU can cough up, and easier to find too! Cause no gun's out of my reach thanks to my little gift from those Mega-Sci-Corp clowns! Not even portal guns are safe from my each with this baby!"
  • Captain Icenguard: "Oh yes, I would imagine that weaponry locator device is very beneficial to your business as an illegit weapons dealer."
  • Mr. Gunnery: "Damn straight!"
  • Captain Icenguard: "And now, with a set of, "Volunteers", (Points to the caged Humming Birds), and the greatest Yeti-Capturing Weaponry available, I will enjoy adding the Yeti Brothers, to my expansive collection! (Shows a collection of caged and jarred legendary creatures and beings on his ship) I will become the most powerful collector of creatures of untested existences to date!"
  • Mr. Gunnery: "(Whistles)! You could make a FORTUNE with a collection like that!"
  • Captain Icenguard: "I would, but I prefer to keep them as a private collection of pets."
  • Mr. Gunnery: "Well that's a waste of money. These things would sell like mad in the black market!"
  • Captain Icenguard: "Well, I have different plans, clearly."
  • Mr. Gunenry: "Fair enough, fair enough, but if you ever get bored, I can hook ya up with alot of Black Market guys I know! I even know some Mafia Alliance Representatives!"
  • Captain Icenguard: "Note that I would NEVER intent to be bored with my legendary collection! I have been fascinated with legendaries ever since I was a pup, and when I saw the beautiful Rainbow Bird of the Skys! A deity level avian that has been around the Dragon Realms far longer than even the dragons! Even being believed to be why the power gems exists! Alongside the Yeti Brothers for their power, I have been looking for her in a good long while! And legend said that the bird will be attracted to a large gathering of every legendary creature in the world in one spot! Having the Yeties is CRUCIAL to making her appear, so I may capture her and complete the collection!"
  • Mr. Gunnery began to look more sinister and started to look as if he's getting his own idea....
  • Mr. Gunnery: ".... Annnnd, would that bird be worth a fortune as well?"
  • Captain Icenguard: "She would have the price equivalent of a thoundson dimensions to the Dragons of the Dragon Realms cause of her cultural significance!"
  • Mr. Gunnery: "(Gets more sinister), Then, I don't suppose ya mind if I, help you out with those Yeti Bros? I hear talk those are not easy to face!"
  • (Deadpool): Dude, can you get any more obvious with your twist villains?
  • (Scroopfan): "Deadpool, can you NOT?!"
  • Captain Icenguard: Of course.
  • Gunnery: Good. (He smiles)
  • Captain Icenguard: So, let's get started. To catch a Yeti, you must think like one... And by that, I mean learn to detect their roars. (He brought out a sonar and it picked up a Yeti roar)... And we're off. (They left as Gunnery chuckled)

Ice Caverns

  • Icky: Okay, I think we're lost.
  • Byrd: We are NOT lost. I have a good sense of direction.
  • Iago: You said that 5 times already, and we're STILL lost.
  • Byrd: (As primate-like hands blocked their paths) I could've SWORN these were the right paths.
  • Icky: Is there ANYONE here that we can ask for directions? Surely these caves have been discovered.
  • Joule: I don't think so. I mean, the Snow Monkey Colosi Monks of Nepal aren't just going to be here. There's no hot springs here.
  • Iago: Where ARE these Yeti Brothers supposed to be, given that off-camera we'd decided to go looking for them given that Icenguard's after them?
  • Joule: Mount Vetruvius. The tallest mountain here.
  • Icky: Then, uh, why aren't we there?
  • Byrd: Because we caused an avalanche and got stuck here, remember?
  • Icky: Yeah, but why couldn't we have just-
  • Joule: Everyone! Calm down! We can figure this out.
  • ???: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
  • Iago:... Tell me that was someone's stomach.
  • Byrd: Unfortunately no.
  • Joule: I think the Yeti Brothers found us.
  • Icky:... Question. Is there ANYTHING known about these two?
  • Joule: Not much, actually. They're very shy amongst strangers. But the only ones they truly got along with was your comrades Spyro and Cynder.
  • Iago: Wait, really? Those two met them?
  • Joule: From what I heard. They never told you? I mean, me and Byrd share history with them too. I'm the one who got them used to alien/modern-day technology when they were looking for directions.
  • Byrd: They rescued my land from remaining Grublins.
  • Icky:... Those two have GOT to be more open to us about their times before Cynder was recorrupted.
  • ???: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!
  • Iago: SHADDAP!!! (The words echoed)
  • ???: AAGGGGGGGGGUUUUUUUUUUAAA!!!
  • Byrd:... I think you just made them mad.
  • ???: RAAAAAHHHHHHH!! (Two giant Yetis similar to LoS Apes but more gorilla-stanced appeared, one much bigger than the other as it pounded its chest roaring)
  • Icky: YETI!!!!
  • Iago: NO S***!!!!
  • Byrd: RETREEAT!! (The smaller Yeti got in front of them making crazy monkey noises)
  • Big Yeti:... RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!
  • Icky: NO! PLEASE! IF WE DIE, THEN SPYRO AND CYNDER WON'T TELL US ABOUT YOU BOTH!!
  • Big Yeti: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA- Huh? (The Yetis stood down)... Spyro... Cynder... Friends!
  • Icky:... Wow. I never thought they'd recognize those names.
  • Iago: So you DO know them.
  • Big Yeti:... Name... Bentley.
  • Little Yeti:... Name... Bartholomew.
  • Icky:... Ohhhh, so you're THOSE guys. The LoS versions of them. I mean, I know Legend of Spyro took alot of creative liberties in making established characters different from the original series, but, WOW! You two are the most radical departure from the original Yeti Bros."
  • Iago: Yeah, the ORIGINAL Bentley had a pretty colorful vocabulary.
  • Bentley:... Herugh?
  • Icky: Eh, don't think too deeply about that. It'll hurt your head. So, big guy, you hear about those assholes that're coming after you?
  • Bentley:... Ass... Holes?
  • Bartholomew: Assholes! ASSHOLES ASSHOLES ASSHOLES ASSHOLES ASSHOLES!
  • Iago: Okay, looks like we taught the kiddy a bad word. Fantastic.
  • Icky: Yeah. So, I guess they don't know what it means. Um, bad people... Want... You!
  • Bentley:... Bad people... Want... Us.
  • Icky: Yeah. You come across them?
  • Bentley:... No. No bad people.
  • Byrd: Then I guess we came just in time. Listen, Bentley, There's these Ice Scavengers that kidnapped some hummingbird friends of ours and are forcing them to get involved with their endeavors involving you and your little brother. We would like some aide in the endeavor to save the hummingbirds."
  • Bentley:... Bentley don't know.
  • Bartholomew: BARTHOLOMEW SAY WE TIP SOMETHING OVEEER!!!!
  • Iago: Wow. Your little brother seems to have a fire burning in him.
  • Bentley:... This place too cold for fire.
  • Iago: I MEANT he's got spirit.
  • Bentley:... He's not dead.
  • Iago: OH FOR THE LOVE OF, DO I HAVE TO SPELL IT OUT FOR YOU?! He's BRAVE!
  • Bentley: OHHHHHHH.
  • Bartholomew: YES!
  • Byrd: They seem to want you two specifically. We don't know why, but it can't be good.
  • Joule: We must stop them. You feel like, smashing some stuff?
  • Bartholomew: BARTHOLOMEW DO!!!
  • Bentley:... Eh, why not? Bentley out of shape lately and needs practice. Also happens that me LOVE smacking around mean Ice Scavengers! They mean to legendaries!
  • Icky: So you DO know them.
  • Bentley: YES!
  • Icky: And you KNOW why they're here?
  • Bentley: YES!!
  • Icky: Then why are we standing around giving them more time? Let's kick their asses!
  • Bartholomew:... That not body part I heard of.
  • Iago:... (Sighs) Another name for a donkey, AND butt.
  • Bartholomew: OHHHHHHHHHH!
  • Iago: AND, that's what THEY think YOU two are. They think you're too dumb to defend yourselves. That you're cavemen who do nothing but pee on yourselves waiting for a challenge.
  • Bartholomew: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA?!?!? (He roared and punched everything)
  • Bentley:... Odd... Motivational speech.
  • Iago: They think that about you too.
  • Bentley: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAAA!! (He tore off a giant icicle and made it into a giant club) SMASH SMASH SMAAAAASHH!!
  • Bartholomew: ASSHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLES!!!
  • The two yeties charged off!
  • Byrd: "..... Did you two have to get them so riled up?"
  • Icky: Hey, makes it easier if there's only a few of us.
  • Byrd: "I mean, I'm pretty sure those Ice Scavengers would be prepared for those Yeties! In fact, I hear talk that Icenguard has gotten friendly with this pistol shrimp with a litteral gunclaw."
  • Icky and Iago made concerned face....
  • Icky/Iago: "...... AWWWW CRAP, MR. GUNNERY?!"
  • Byrd: "Wait, Mr. Gunnery?"
  • Icky: "He's basically a guy we've been after since late 2019 when he broke out of that Aquarium Prison Mike Cubafish was in! Guy's a netourious arms dealer armed with a Mega-Sci-Corp super-weapon from before Marz showed up! That Shrimp doesn't mess around! He's prepared for anything! He's even able to counter Shen's cannons, Cynder's Avatar, HE'S EVEN ABLE TO GET MOTHRON STUFF TO GIVE GAZELLE SOME TROUBLE?!"
  • Byrd: ".... I trust this is bad then?"
  • Icky: "BAD AS IT YA SHOULD'VE TOLD US GUNNERY'S INVOLVED?! IT'S GONNA BE CHAOS OUT THERE?!"
  • Joule: "Well, on the plus-side, at least it won't nessersarly be any easier for the Ice Scavengers either. They may be expecting to face the Yeties, but maybe not an all too soon encounter."
  • Icky: "Well all the same, we need to bust Gunnery before he becomes Icey's trump card against them! Remember, this guy is even able to give THE UNITER a serious headache! Compared to that, two giant snow monkeys are just target-practice, even in rage-mode!"
  • Iago: OHHHHH, GREAT! WHAT A WASTE OF A PERFECTLY GOOD AND COMICAL MOTIVATIONAL SPEECH!!
  • Icky: Can you PLEASE stop yelling and start doing?! Geez, I'm starting to find your screaming annoying.
  • Iago: I'M VOICED BY A GUY WITH A DRY SCRATCHY VOICE! OF COURSE I GOTTA INDULGE IT!
  • Byrd: SILENCE! Both of you! You both made this mess, now you BOTH clean it up.
  • Icky/Iago: DON'T TELL US WHAT TO DO! (They went outside while farting in their direction)
  • Joule:... Okay, that's just, unnecessary.
  • Byrd: The cold in this place must be getting to them... That and the low oxygen of this altitude. They're NOT high-flying birds. Granted, probably doesn't help that those two are known for, eccentric behaviors to begin with.
  • Joule: Come on! We must help them!

Mount Vitruvius

  • Icenguard's crew were setting up various traps.
  • Icenguard: "Excellent. With these traps, we will ALWAYS be ready for the Yeti Brothers. Then, my collection will attract the Rainbow Bird. And then, my collection, will be collected! That beautiful avian will be mine forever to view alone!"
  • Gunnery: Ohhhhohohoh, yes it will. Glad to lend my assistance for this. It's been a LONG time since I did something this big.
  • Icenguard:... You sound like you're in this WAAAY more than you really should.
  • Mr. Gunnery: "Hey now, don't worry, it's just your little collection speech piqued my interest is all."
  • Icenguard: Maybe... It peeked your interest too much. Is there something you're not telling me?
  • ???: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUAAAA!! (Bentley and Bartholomew came in with Bentley cartoonishly smashing Icenguard into the snow with his club)
  • Bartholomew: AAAAAAAAAAAASHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLE!!
  • Gunnery: About TIME you two showed up. (He fired his pincer guns as Bentley got out of the way, learning how to deflect the bullets with his club as the two beat up on him until he overcharged his pincer blasters, knocking them both down) HAH! Did anyone ever tell you two apes who I am?
  • Bentley:... No.
  • Gunnery: Well, good. Because you didn't need to know. (He charged his cannons until Bentley deflected the blast with his club, wrecking the mountainside and causing an avalanche) AVALANCE!
  • Icenguard: (Getting out of the snow) Aw crap! (They were all caught in it and buried in snow)
  • Bentley: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUAAAAUUUUUUAAA!!
  • Bartholomew: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLEEE!!!
  • Icenguard was trapped in the snow once more as Mr. Gunnery had a sinister grin on his face....
  • Icenguard: "..... Pardon my french, Mr. Gunnery, but, I'm getting the impression that you have your own goals in mind?!"
  • Mr. Gunnery: "Oh that reminds me, have I ever told you about my cousin? He's called "SHIT SHERLOCK", First name "NO"!"
  • Icenguard:... What say you?
  • Mr. Gunnery: That Rainbow Bird? A creature as valued as that will make me RICH!
  • Icenguard: OH OF COURSE IT'S FOR THE MONEY!
  • Mr. Gunnery: Oh, hi kettle, name's pot, you're black.
  • Icenguard: HEY, MY REASONS WERE NOT FOR MONEY?!
  • Mr. Gunnery: "But you said the bird's with the Power Gems!"
  • Icenguard: "THAT DIDN'T MEANT I WAS AFTER THEM?!"
  • Mr. Gunnery: "Kinda why I'm dumping your ass because you're too short-sighted, ya mutt! I'm gonna-"
  • Bentley: SHAAAADAAAAPP! (He bashed them both into the snow)
  • Bartholomew: THEY, REALLY ANNOYING!! Also, me felt like Birds didn't know about lobster thing. But me no hold against me. Me feel like birds no good with hindsight.
  • Mr. Gunnery: "(Barely got back up) I'M A SHRIMP, YOU BIG APE?!"
  • Bartholomew: SHADDAP! (He punched him back into the snow)
  • Icky: (They arrived) ALRIGHT, GUYS, WE GOTTA- (They saw that Icenguard and Gunnery were already beaten)... Wow.
  • Iago: These guys are stronger than we thought. Good for you two.
  • Bentley: Spyro and Cynder teach us a lot.
  • Icky: I'll bet they have.
  • Icenguard: WE'RE NOT BEATEN- (Bentley started clubbing them both multiple times back into the snow)... (Muffled in snow) This is perhaps not one of my better expeditions.
  • Byrd: "(While freeing the Humming Birds) Captain Icenguard, you and your crew are under millaterry arrest for kidnapping a millaterry division! Along with illegal ownership of mythics!"
  • Icenguard: I'M NOT GOING DOWN! What's the worst you can do, knock me unconscious- (Bentley did that)
  • Byrd:... You really shouldn't give us ideas.
  • Mr. Gunnery: "(Still on the ground in pain) Yeesh, so much for being the smarter cousin of Skabb."
  • Byrd: Hey, the temperature and thin air up here get to us all. Even the smarties.
  • Icky: Alright, Gunnery, it'll be a HELL of a praiseworthy story for us to have finally caught your ass after a year-in-a-half.
  • Gabrielle: Oui-oui. Now, where is the Indestructible Lamp plans?
  • Gunnery: I will NEVER talk!
  • Iago: Oh? (He took his guns)... Looks like these guns took years to make.
  • Gunnery: (Gasp) No! Not my guns!
  • Iago: Yes your guns. Something as advanced as these must not be easy to rebuild after the craziness 2020 made for us all. Increased law enforcement, the Lodgers becoming stronger by rebranding themselves now that Kairi isn't around, and also Mega-Sci Corp giving the law more to use to enforce itself. What a shame. Looks like if something were to happen to them, you'd never be able to have them again.
  • Gunnery: NO! NONONO!
  • Iago: Yes, YESYESYES! Bentley? Would you do the honors?
  • Bentley: YEEEAAAAHHH! (He got his club ready to smash his guns)
  • Gunnery: NO, NO, NO, NO!!! ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT, THE ONES WE TOOK FROM THE FAIRY KINGDOM, BYRD LANDS, AND HERE ARE IN OUR SHIP!! WE WERE GOING TO DISPOSE OF THEM IN AN ISOLATED AREA WITH THE ATTENTION WE GOT!! (He sobbed)
  • Icky: All we needed to hear.... Bentley? (Bentley smashed the guns)
  • Gunnery: NAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! MY BAAABIIIIIIIESSS!!!! JESUS CHRIST MISFITS, I KNOW I'M THE BAD GUY HERE, BUT DID YOU HAVE TO DO THAT?!
  • Icky: "To be fair, you have been known to pull last-minute surprises. We couldn't risk sparing those guns."
  • Gunnery: "..... Oh it's gonna take me forever to get my merch back in order again!"
  • Byrd: "Keep in mind though that the loss of weaponry is gonna be the least of your concerns."
  • Mr. Gunnery: "Awww s***, the jailbait thing. HOW COULD I FORGET?!"
  • Icky: Because villains want to forget jail. (They cuffed them)
  • Bentley: Thanks for saving Bentley and Bartholomew.
  • Bartholomew: AAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSHOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEE!!!
  • Icky:... Is that SERIOUSLY going to be your catchphrase?
  • Bartholomew: YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!!! IT MEANS BUUUUUUUUUTT!!
  • Iago: I would've gone for something close to 'CAPTAAAIN, CAAAAAAVEMaAAAaaAAAaaAAAN!' or something like that.
  • Bartholomew: Who that?
  • Icky: Cartoon character from Hannah-Barbera.
  • Bartholomew: What Hannah-Barbera?
  • Icky: A, cartoon company.
  • Bartholomew:... What cartoon?
  • Icky: Ugh, just get a dictionary, will ya?
  • Bartholomew: What dictionary?
  • Icky: Oh for f***'s sake! Can we please get to the next story segment of this episode here?!

Chapter 3: Rabbit Catacombs/Kangaroo Hoodoos

Canada

  • Icky: (As the scene was literally slammed in)... I just HAD to ask.
  • Byrd: "Well now that we freed Icengaurd's collection, we can continue on with the mission.
  • Bentley: We come, for Spyro.
  • Bartholomew: AND Cynder!
  • Byrd: Well, our next stop is the Rabbit Catacombs.
  • Iago: Rabbit, Catacombs?
  • Joule: The Rabbits here are masters of Dragon Realms magic. They can even command the Earth around it to fit their needs.
  • Icky: And THIS is where the next copy for the lamp is?
  • Joule: "Yes. You will love the catacombs, it's beautiful this time of year."

Inside the Catacombs.

  • The area is an utter ghost town.
  • Icky: ".... And alchourse, this is a sign we're about to deal with our NEXT problem."
  • Byrd: "Why on earth is this place deserted?"
  • ???: "PSST?!"
  • The group looks at a rabbit kid in a barrel.
  • Rabbit Kid: "(Quietly) It's not safe here! Hide!"
  • Iago: "..... Annnnnd, why is tha- ((Marching is heard) Yee?!"
  • Byrd: "EVASIVE MANUVEERS?!"
  • The group hid the best they can, as a marching platoon of Hunting Dogs marched across the area like imperial soldiers.
  • Icky: "..... (Quietly) Called it, something CLEARLY went wrong here."

The direct the platoon is heading.

  • An Imperialistic Bulldog holding a crutch was seen moving towards a noose stand being built.....
  • Dog Imperial: "(Approaches the Bulldog) Good news, General O'Bite. The Noose will be ready soon."
  • General O'Bite: "Good. Then soon, I can see to the execution, of Serpas' little pet bunny."
  • The two looked at a caged female rabbit held down with magic restraints....
  • General O'Bite: "..... How I look forward to cleansing the last of Serpas' legacy, you witch.... With you gone, no trace of the awful memory of Serpas will exist anymore."
  • Rabbit: Buster, that was a LONG time ago! I've changed!
  • General O'Bite: I seriously doubt it.
  • Rabbit: WOULDN'T I HAVE DONE SOMETHING BAD ALREADY- (O'Bite snapped and barked loudly, scaring her)
  • General O'Bite: Yeah, you better flinch, bitch.
  • Icky:... Who is that?
  • Rabbit Kid: That's our local mage, Bianca.
  • Icky/Iago: Of course.
  • Rabbit Kid:... What was that?
  • Icky: Never mind. Um, why are they doing this?
  • Rabbit Kid: (Sighs) It's a long story.

Flashback

  • (Rabbit Kid): When Bianca was a child, she was the adopted daughter of the queen. Then when she died during the Great Cleansing, Bianca felt shamed and went into self-exile. She eventually came across... Sorceress Serpas.
  • (Iago): Who dat?
  • (Rabbit Kid): Do you have to ask the question I was going to answer?
  • (Iago): Sorry. Go on.
  • (Rabbit Kid): Ahem. Serpas hated dragons because she blamed them for the Great Cleansing. During the war with Malefor and his forces, she didn't trust them because it was they who gave birth to him. Then when her kingdom in Skelos Badlands was destroyed, the dragons left believing there was no hope for it. Serpas hoped for the best... Then... (The Skelos Badlands was further destroyed by the Great Cleansing as Serpas watched in horror)... She watched as her home was gone for good. She since came to despise dragons for letting her home die. She was so mad, that she killed and ate a starving poor dragon family.
  • (Icky): Christ! That is dark!
  • (Rabbit Kid): Oh, it gets darker. She vowed genocide on all dragons in the Dragon Realms, viewing them as too powerful and dangerous.... Then she brought in Bianca as an apprentice.
  • (Icky/Iago): Of course.
  • (Rabbit Kid):... Anyway, she served well until two dragons named Spyro and Cynder came in to stop her, along with a cheetah friend named Hunter.
  • Serpas: Bianca? Did you eliminate those two dragon pests?
  • Bianca: UGH! I tried, but, UGH, they're too strong for me!
  • Serpas: TOO, STRONG?!? (She breathed elemental magic everywhere as Bianca magically shielded herself) HOW HARD CAN THAT BE, BLAST IT?! THEY'RE JUST YOUNGLINGS!!
  • Bianca: One is a PURPLE Dragon, you know. And I think the other one was THE Cynder!
  • Serpas:.... Okay, on second thought, perhaps your failure should've been expected. BUT IT SERVES MY POINT ABOUT THE PAIN DRAGONS HAVE BROUGHT TO US?! They're the most dangerous dragons of all!
  • Bianca: Look, I... Do we REALLY have to kill them?
  • Serpas: (Displeased frown with a face that reads "Did you seriously just fucking asked that?")...... Bianca?... Please tell me I did not hear that question. Cause that sounded like the stupid question, TO END ALL STUPID QUESTIONS?!
  • Bianca: I just, I, this seems unnecessary. Killing dragons seems a little... Extreme. Why don't we just turn them to stone or exile them or-
  • Serpas: FOOLISH RABBIT!!! DRAGONS ARE THE REASON I LOST MY HOME, AND YOU LOST YOUR MOTHER!!! HOW COULD YOU ASK SOMETHING LIKE THAT?!?
  • Bianca: I, I, I'm sorry, Sorceress. I-
  • Serpas: Bianca, just an apology isn't enough. You must redeem this act. This compassion for our enemy could be dangerous. They could corrupt you away from your ONE chance to become a sorceress. Do you KNOW what I do to people who go soft? I make them BETTER! I make them monsters fit to do their job. If they end up overwhelmed, I leave it behind and get a NEW one! I do NOT accept weakness in ANY category, Bianca. ANYTHING that hinders my plans to cleanse this world of the worst creatures to set foot on it. Bianca, as loyal as you are, I never thought for ONCE that I'd have to be ordering you to stop caring so much. Your orders are clear: Kill ANY dragon, ON SIGHT! I don't care what age, infant, young, adult, elderly, they're all nothing but trouble. I trusted them and they turned their backs on me. I will NEVER make the same mistake AGAIN! Am I making myself clear?
  • Bianca:... Yes, Sorceress. It won't happen again.
  • Serpas: It BETTER not. Consider this your ONLY warning. If this happens again, then there will be SERIOUS consequences. Now do your job, AND KILL THOSE TWO DRAGONS!!
  • (Rabbit Kid): So instead of killing them, she instead urged them to at least leave the Dragon Realms or do anything that keeps them out of harm's way. But Spyro, Cynder, and Hunter were just not deterred. Bianca was scared for her loyalties... Then despite her best efforts, it was all for naught.
  • Serpas: Bianca! I am gravely disappointed in you. My spies tell me you have been trying to forcibly relocate the dragons off this world of their own will.
  • Bianca: No, lies!
  • Serpas: UGH! MY SPIES DO NOT LIE.... Well, not to ME at least if they value their lives?! Enough nonsense, Bianca!
  • Bianca: ".... If, it helps, had they agreed to leave, it would still benefit you-"
  • Serpas: THEY OBVIOUSLY DIDN'T, YOU WING-DING OF A GIRL?! SO BASICALLY, YA WASTED EVERYONE'S TIME?! You have betrayed my trust. You have forgotten your place here.
  • Bianca: NO! I HAVEN'T!
  • Serpas: Then prove it! (She whistles as a dinosaur brought in a newly-hatched dragon)... If you're TRULY loyal to me, then you will do this simple act: KILL THIS DRAGON BABY!
  • Bianca:... I...
  • Serpas: Just do it! Kill this little abomination before it grows into yet another monster like the rest!
  • Bianca:...
  • Serpas: DO IT!!
  • Bianca: (She aimed her wand at it and saw in its baby crying eyes sadness and Bianca could only struggle)... (She sobbed)... (She dropped the wand) I CAN'T DO IT!
  • Serpas:.... (Gestures the Dino to take the baby dragon back to where it was gained) Just as I thought. You were ALWAYS weak.
  • Bianca: VALUE IN LIFE, IS NOT WEAKNESS, SORCERESS!! And disregarding it, is NOT strength.
  • Serpas:... Well, if that hatchling was Malefor, I'd doubt you'd be so easily passive. If I ever had the chance to wipe out that beast from history, I'd do it in a heartbeat even at the risk of angering the Time Councilors! I mean, because the dragons didn't had the nerve to dispose of him while they had the chance, my home wouldn't've been DECIMATED?!
  • Bianca: It's NOT their fault.
  • Serpas: YES IT IS! They created Malefor and left my home to DIE! They're MONSTERS!!
  • Bianca: They're no MONSTERS, Sorceress! YOU ARE! (The dinosaurs gasped in shock)
  • Dinosaur 1: "(Like the Angry Birds Mime) Oh my gaaaood."
  • Dinosaur 2: "(Like the short-troll from Dreamworks Troll) Oh my god."
  • Serpas:...
  • Bianca: Yeah, I said it! YOU'RE a monster! Just like-
  • Serpas: DON'T, YOU DARE SAY IT!!
  • Bianca:... JUST LIKE MALEFOR!! (Serpas cast a spell that scarred Bianca in her right eye as she screamed, then Serpas grabbed her by the ears)
  • Serpas: YOU HAVE ALWAYS BEEN A WASTE OF MY RESOURCES AND MY POWER, YOU FOOLISH RABBIT! You have forgotten what I told you a LONG time ago! The most powerful sorcerers don't have anything to lose. The only way to be a true sorcerer is to have NO concerns. Yet that was ALWAYS your problem! YOU ALWAYS TAKE SHOTS FROM THOSE WHO ARE NOT AWARE OF HOW DANGEROUS DRAGONS ARE!! SO YOU ARE NO LONGER OF ANY USE TO ME! (She wounded her and tossed her out a window as she fell from the massive peak)... Oy. I always lose apprentices this way!
  • (Rabbit Kid): Luckily, Spyro, Cynder, and Hunter were able to save her from a critical fall. They nursed her back to health, and Bianca explained that Serpas abandoned her.
  • (Icky): ".... Jesus H. Christ, and I thought the OG-Soccress was a psychotic bitch, BUT THIS?!"
  • (Rabbit Kid): OG-Sorceress? Ugh, whatever, you'll be glad to know she's dead. She, Hunter, Spyro, and Cynder had her killed inside her own volcano because she was too dangerous to live.
  • (Icky): Good. She was one of those villains who deserved it.

Present

  • Rabbit Kid: Bianca's been helping us recover ever since. It's been swell... Until O'Bite here ruined it.
  • Icky: "What's his beef?"
  • Rabbit Kid: "Embitter War Veteran that fought against Serpas during her rampage.... It didn't ended up well for him."
  • Iago: "Well if the fact he walks with a crutch is any indication, no duh!"
  • Rabbit Kid: Well, since you guys are Lodgers, I guess you could, I don't know, do what you always do?
  • Byrd: Kid, there's a lot of them, and only a few of us.
  • Rabbit Kid: Okay, my name is not Kid. It's Kit.
  • Icky: Um, haven't you forgotten the giant Yeti in the room?
  • Bentley:... Oh, right! RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!
  • Bartholomew: AAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSHOOOOOOOOOOOLES!!! (They beat up several of the dogs)
  • O'Bite: WHAT THE BARK?!?
  • Bianca: WHAT THE HOP?!?
  • Dog 1: "YETIS?!"
  • Dog 2: "AW SCREW THIS, I DIDN'T SIGNED UP FOR YETIS?!"
  • The Dogs made a run for it!
  • General O'Bite: "NO NO NO?! GET BACK HERE, YOU IDIOTS?! Uggggggh?! The finest soldiers from Houndin indeed?!"
  • Bentley: (He landed in front of him)... Are you any different?
  • O'Bite:... OF COURSE! (He fires as Bentley blocked them with his club)... OKAY, F*** THIS, I'M A DOG! (He attacked with his teeth as Bentley just grabbed him by the head and banged it all over the place) PHHHMPM! MMPH!! MMMMMHMHMHMHPH!! OOMMPH!!!
  • Bianca: (She started giggling)
  • O'Bite: "DAAAAAH, MY EVERYTH-D'OH-THING?!"
  • Bartholomew: GET HIM, BENTLEY!! (After a comical beating, a disfigured O'Bite was waddling away until he was pinned and cuffed)
  • Byrd: Not so fast, doggy. You are under arrest.
  • Bianca: Thanks for the help guys.
  • Icky: Don't mention it. (They free her from her cage)
  • Bianca: WHEW! (She magically summoned her wand) Finally! Got my wand back. Not that I needed it. If it wasn't for that cage made from those wicked unnatural black crystals, I would've gotten out on my own.
  • Iago: Well, again, you're welcome. So, um, we heard you know Spyro and Cynder.
  • Bianca: Indeed. But, I was KIND of expecting HUNTER to come.
  • Icky: Hunter?... Oh, please tell me you two aren't a couple like in the original franchise.
  • Bianca:... Um... No. We're, uh, just friends. Why exactly do you bring that up?
  • Iago: We have GOT to stop talking like this is the original franchise.
  • Bianca: WHAT original franchise, what are you talking about?
  • Joule: Never mind them, they just ramble on like this is some kind of, reboot of something.
  • Bianca:... Fascinating. I've been rescued by a bunch of loons.
  • ???: I'M HERE! (LoS Hunter arrived) I...... Am late, I see.
  • Bianca: What took you so long?
  • Hunter: Getting from the Eastern US to Canada IS a long way to travel.
  • Bianca: Wait, THAT'S where you were?! I thought Avalar wasn't too far.
  • Hunter: You'd be amazed on how surprisingly far certain places can be.
  • Icky: "Well it depends on which part of Canada this place is in and which part of Dragon Realms USA Hunty boy is from."
  • Joule: It's the Southwest of Canada.
  • Icky: In that case, FAAAR!
  • Hunter: (Sighs)
  • Bianca: Well, you must've been through an exhausting trip.
  • Hunter: "I mean, typically I'm used to long trips, my name's Hunter for a reason, but, WOW, that trip though."
  • Byrd: "Ahem! If I may, I must bring up that we're here for serious business. Miss Bianca, I don't know if you heard the latest news about the Indestructible Lamp, but-"
  • Bianca: Oh, I did. O'Bite brought it to some thieves before I could get it.
  • Icky: Ugh.
  • Iago: Then we got us some thieves to catch.
  • Bianca: They're probably anywhere by now.
  • Iago: Yeah.
  • Joule: Oh, we'll find them. How do you think I knew where they were in the first place? (He shows them a tracking device) I placed a tracking device on each copy.
  • Icky:... You'd think they'd have found them.
  • Joule: They have a silent signal, and they're made from smartpaper.
  • Iago:... Smartpaper?... Okay, technology just got weirder.
  • Joule: "But there's no time to waste. It's unlikely these thieves would take any breaks."

Elsewhere.

  • A Triplet of Purple Robed Thieves were seen traversing the area.
  • Purple Thief 2: "(Exhausted pant), Are we there yet?"
  • Purple Thief 3: "I'm hungry!"
  • Purple Thief 2: "Can't we rest somewhere?"
  • Purple Thief 1: "WE CAN'T AFFORD ANY BREAKS!! That would give pursuers a chance to catch up! We have to keep focus! This purple coloration means we're the elite team! We have to do things seriously!"
  • Purple Thief 2: "Well I'm sure even elites need food and sleep."
  • Purple Thief 3: "I'm just glad we already covered the bathroom thing back in Bunnyville."
  • Purple Thief 1: It's Burrowport. That was it's last name before the Great Cleansing, because people agreed Bunnyville was stupid.
  • Purple Thief 3: Wait, the thing I said was an actual name? I mainly said Bunnyville as a joke, but, THAT'S A LEGITAMENT THING THEY USED AT SOME POINT?!
  • Purple Thief 1: Kinda why they changed it. Nobody would take them seriously otherwise.
  • Purple Thief 1: Can we ALL just focus? The sooner we get these plans to the boss, the better. We must keep going. No stops.
  • Purple Thief 2: WE CAN'T KEEP GOING ALL THIS WAY FOREVER! Why didn't we just get a carriage?!
  • Purple Thief 1: Because doing so would get traced back to us, and make our capture easier. Besides, much of you could use the exercise.
  • Purple Thief 3: WE EXERCISE ALL THE DAMN TIME!!!
  • Purple Thief 1: Well it doesn't hurt to get some MORE INTO US!
  • Purple Thief 2: Look, boss, we get it's not easy, but EVERYONE needs a break.
  • Purple Thief 1: Last time I took a break, I lost my crew to Interpol. We should've taken a break BEFORE we went all this way.
  • Purple Thief 2: THEN JUST FIND A WAY TO GIVE US A SAFE BREAK, S***FACE!!
  • Purple Thief 1: SHSHSHSHSH, SHUT THE F*** UP, YOU LOUD BITCHES, THEY'LL FIND US!!
  • Icky: (The trio found themselves in front of Icky and Iago's group) Too late. We already heard.
  • Iago: Yeah, so suck it. Give us the plans or Bentley's gonna get his hands dirtier.
  • Bentley: Hehehehe.
  • Purple Thief 2: "..... Ya know, given we argue alot, it's amazing we managed to become elite thieves at all."
  • Icky: Probably because this finally broke the camel's back. NOW GIVE US THE PLANS!"
  • The 3rd Purple Thief chickened up and gave up the plans!
  • Iago: "(Yoinks it) Thank you!"
  • Purple Thieves 1 and 2: "DAMN IT, FRANK?!"
  • Frank: WHAT WERE WE SUPPOSED TO DO ABOUT IT?! THEY GOT A YETI!! NOW THEY'RE GONNA KICK OUR ASSES, AND WE'RE TOO BEAT TO RUN!!
  • Purple Thief 1: "WELL IT'S NOT GONNA HELP THAT YOU MADE US GO OUT LIKE COWARDLY FAILURES?!"
  • Frank: "WELL BECAUSE YOU EXHAUSTED US, NOW WE'RE ALSO GONNA BE EXHAUSTED COWARDLY FAILURES?!"
  • The Triplets began arguing....
  • Icky: ".... Oh F this, I'm triggering their failsafe so they become animals again and shut up! TELL US WHERE THE THIEVES' GUILD IS?!"
  • Triplets: "OH CRA- (The trio turned into animals)....."
  • Bianca: ".... I, see that the theory was true, then. No wonder the thieves seem to vanish after they're caught and somehow get replaced with average animals."
  • Byrd: "Surprised me too after I saw it first time."
  • Bianca: "Though, that raises some questions, like, how are they able to gather so many animals to make members over the years?"
  • Byrd: "Well I had heard that in the Kangaroo Hoodoos that an organized Poucher Operation is implied to be a benefactor of the Thieves Guild that interestingly the animals get delivered to them alive. So, it may not be much of a stretch that, this is how they always get new recruits for all this time."
  • Joule: "What a cowinky-dink, just so happens that the Hoodoos have another copy of the plans there."
  • Icky: "(Crude Australian Accent) So I guess it's off to Dragon Realms Australia, mates! We're going down-under!"

Dragon Realms Australia.

  • A Large decrepted building was seen, as inside, were rows and rows of caged animals as legions of Dingo Poachers were everywhere.
  • A Golden Robed Bejeweled Thief was seen walking with a Cassowary reminiscent of Boss Cass.
  • Cassowary: "I trust these are to your liking, General Goldloot?"
  • General Goldloot: ".... Ugh, what a pitiful selection. Can't wait until they turn into proper thieves. Thus, a satisfactory recruitment operation once again, Supreme O'wary. Consider your payment secured."
  • Supreme O'Wary: "It ever so pleases me to do business with you, General. Okay boys, the customer likes what he sees! Get ready to load the critters up for transport!"
  • ???: Hey, mate. Where ya takin em?
  • Supreme O'Wary: WHA- WHO SAID THAT?!?
  • ???: MY FEET! (A kangaroo kicked O'Wary hard into a rock) YIPPEE!
  • Supreme O'Wary: OOOOWWWWW!!! NOT YOU AGAIN!
  • Goldloot: AGAIN?!? YOU KNOW THIS PERSON?!
  • Supreme O'Wary: A Kangaroo that's been a thorn to our side for a good while since we had opened up shop here!
  • Goldloot: AND YOU NEVER TOLD ME ABOUT HER, WHY?!?
  • Supreme O'Wary: "She was our group's private affair, we didn't wanted to alarm the guild!"
  • Goldloot: THEN DON'T JUST LAY THERE, DO SOMETHING ABOUT HER?! I CAN'T HAVE OUR GUILD'S RECRUITMENT OPERATION BE COMPROMISED ON MY WATCH?!
  • Supreme O'Wary: GET HER! (This played as Dingo Poachers charge at the Kangaroo, but only get smacked around as she displayed cartoonish kangaroo fighting moves)"
Two Up

Two Up

  • A Big Bruser of a Saltwater Crocodile came forth and charged!
  • Kangaroo:... PHAHAHAHA! CHILD'S PLAY, MATE! (She kicked him in the chest so hard, he vomited for 20 seconds) C'mon, ya dumb drongoes. Is that the best you got?
  • Supreme O'Wary: Oh, we are just getting started. (They tossed everything at her as the forces were just kicked off into the distance every time)
  • Kangaroo: Send in another 400, why don'tcha? C'mon. I can do this all day.
  • Goldloot: (Sighs) Must I do EVERYTHING myself? (He took out a shield and sword and attacked her)
  • Kangaroo: ALLY-OOP! (She jumped over him and kicked him from behind) C'mon, hit me! HIT ME LIKE YA MEAN IT!
  • Goldloot: (He attacked with all he had) STOP MOVING!! (He kept swinging his sword, and it got to the point where he was swinging it around randomly before the kangaroo just smacked him down with a boomerang)
  • Supreme O'Wary:... Some great member you were.
  • Kangaroo: Alright, ya bloody drongo. Where's the Thieves Guild? (Suddenly, Goldloot turned into an actual drongo which flew away tweeting)... OMG, he actually WAS a drongo? What're the odds?
  • Supreme O'Wary: WHY YOU OVERGROWN WALLABY- (The kangaroo kicked him in the crotch as he did this)
AHHHHH

AHHHHH

  • Kangaroo: Looks like some wanker's gonna be missing his seedmakers.
  • Supreme O'Wary: "(High-pitched voice) My, poor, potaintional children?! (Kneels down pathetically, reeling in pain!) OHHHHH?!"
  • Kangaroo: "Yikes, I hope ya didn't happened to have a little lady of your own, and if so, I hope you two already made kids before this day happened."
  • A remaining Dingo Poacher that had the keys was seen making a run for it!
  • Dingo Poacher: "SCREW THIS, SCREW THIS, SCREW THIS?!"
  • Kangaroo: Oh no ya don't! (She pinned him down)
  • Dingo Poacher: POOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHH!!... HOW STRONG ARE THOSE LEGS, CHUN LI?!?
  • Kangaroo: What'd you expect? I'm a kangaroo, mate. Where's the Thieves' Guild?
  • Dingo Poacher: HOW SHOULD I KNOW?! THE ONLY ONES WHO DO KNOW ARE THE THIEVES THEMSELVES, AND YOU CAN'T ASK THEM!
  • Kangaroo: Ah, ballocks! Well, I'll find a way. What about those lamp plans?
  • Dingo Poacher: I DON'T KNOW THAT EITHER! THEY KEPT IT CONFIDENTIAL!!
  • Kangaroo: DOUBLE BALLOCKS!
  • Dingo Poacher: "Consider this, do you think something as impourent as plans for an inescapable and indestructible lamp would fall into the knowledge of a lowly mutt like me? Don't ya think I would've already yapped about it by now to reduce the amount of PAIN you're doing on me?!"
  • Kangaroo: ".... Okay, fair enough, BUT SURELY YOU AT LEAST KNEW SOMEONE WHO DOES?!"
  • Dingo Poacher: "I'd already sung like a canary by now if I have ANY knowledge of that! (Pressure gets harder) AYE AYE AYE?! But I think the best people to know that are Mr. O'Wary and Goldoot?! PLEASE STOP HURTING ME?!"
  • Kangaroo: Righto. All I need. (She dug his head into the ground before grabbing O'Wary) Alright, no more games, ya painted turkey. Where's those indestructible lamp plans?
  • O'Wary: You can't make me talk! YOU CAN'T! (The kangaroo looked angrily at him)... B-But I'd like to see you, try?... I hope that wasn't the wrong thing to say- (The kangaroo kicked him in the groin more and more) AHH! AAAAHH!! AAAHHHH!!! AAAHHHHH!!! WHY DOES IT HURT MORE EVERY OTHER TIIHIHIIME?! AAAAAHHHHAHAHAHAH!!!
  • Kangaroo: You think that's something? Getta loada THIS! (She put her stinky feet in his face as a foghorn sound was heard with his reaction)
  • O'Wary: OH MY GUAAHGH!!! I-BLEEUUUEEEHAHHHH!!!! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? WHERE ARE YOU WALKING?!
  • Kangaroo: Everywhere.
  • O'Wary: AAAHUAUAUAAUAAAAAHHH!! (He was about to vomit)
  • Kangaroo: Tell me what I want to know, or I may find a way to put my foot up your throat so that you'll be vomiting for weeks.
  • O'Wary: OKAY OKAY, I'LL TALK, I'LL TALK!! THEY'RE IN SEASHELL SHORES, SOMEWHERE! THAT'S ALL I KNOW!! I HEARD IT FROM SOME DUMB SAP THIEF, OKAY?!? NOW GET YOUR FILTHY FEET OUT OF MY FACE!!!
  • Kangaroo: That's what I wanna hear, you little wanker. (She spun him around and hurled him all the way into a ranger's van as everyone saw him and cuffed him) HAVE A FUN TRIP TO THE SLAMMER, MATE!! (Laughs until she turned to meet Icky, Iago, and their group)
  • Hunter:... My word.
  • Kangaroo:... Uh, who are you?
  • Icky: Wow. We didn't even need to do anything here. This lady had it all under control. This sheila's got some lower body strength.
  • Kangaroo: Uh, the NAME is Sheila.
  • Icky: (Dubbed as Timon) No, really. (An awkward pause occurs) All right, then.
  • Joule: "Miss Sheila, we're here to inform you that we're here to contain the plans for the indestructible lamp."
  • Sheila: "Well just so happens that O'Wary just admitted that the plans are being held in Seashell Shores now."
  • Icky: "Ohhh, that sounds like a beach segment! Score! That means hot sun, ocean air, and swimsuits!"
  • Byrd: "Well try not to get TOO excited, gentlemen. We're going there for serious business."
  • Hunter: "There's the matter of where in the shores the plans would be held."
  • Sheila: "Well I heard from some old seal friends that there's a giant sandcastle that took over the entire beach and is guarded by "Beach Knights"."
  • Icky: "..... You're kidding....."

Seashell Shores

  • A Giant Sand Castle was seen, as various crabs with clam-themed armor and weaponry were seen patrolling literally everywhere. Inside the castle, there was an albatross in kingly robes, in the theme of a beach and swim trunks as he was being fanned by female seagulls in bikinis.
  • Albatross: "(Hoity Laughter) I LOVE being the KING OF ALL BEACHES!?"
  • An Adviser Pelican dressed like a 1700s era royal sea navy came forth.
  • Pelican: "Glorious King of Beaches Albert Trossoroff The 9th and a half, you have special guests."
  • King Albert: "Ohhhh! Let them in, Grand Vizor Deepthroat!"
  • Deepthroat obeyed as he gestured the crab guards to let in a Silver-Robed Thief and a collection of Green Robed Thieves.
  • King Albert: "Oh hey, are you Goldloot's little friend? Silverstream, right?"
  • Silver Robed Thief: "No. I am LT. Silverstealth. One of the best thieves of the guild, and Goldloot's Protege. I came to request your majesty, to make sure these, (Shows the Indestructible Lamp Plans), Aren't able to leave your palace."
  • King Albert: "Oy, figures you guys only visit cause ya want me to keep something safe for ya. (Gestures a guard to do so) It's never to say Hi or anything! I'm more than just a place to dump your stolen crap to, ya know!"
  • Silverstealth: "We meant no disrespect to one of the Guild's most prestigious benefactors, your highness. It's just, your palace is beneficial for us to be able to secure our objects."
  • King Albert: "Tch, only because MT and I go way back as old friends. So, care to tell me why you want me to safeguard, paper of all things? I mean, money I'd understand, but-"
  • Silverstealth: It's plans for a lamp that's indestructible and can contain genies permanently.
  • King Albert:... Say no more. MT's serious relationship with Gee Nee means THAT is gonna be a problem.
  • Silverstealth: Exactly. So, you sure you can handle it? You might even expect company. There's crazy rumors in the Guild that the two birdbrains of the Lodge, Icky and Iago, have been collecting many other copies of the plans and have new allies, INCLUDING that kangaroo vigilante.
  • King Albert: You mean Sheila? WHOO, that lady's got a good ass... If I could see it under that large tail.
  • Silverstealth:... You SERIOUSLY have a crush on that kangaroo?
  • King Albert: C'mon, I'm the king of the goddamn beach. At this point, I have a crush on ALL girls because they wear nothing but swimsuits... Or often nothing if you know what I mean. Wink-wink.
  • Silverstealth: One, gross if it's not animal chicks. Two, don't get too attracted to Sheila if she shows up with those two Lodgers and their other allies. They're coming for the plans. Don't disappoint the MT.
  • King Albert: I won't.
  • Silverstealth: You WON'T? Because the last few who tried to protect these, DID.
  • King Albert: Well I'M not like those other guys. I am the king of the beach, bitch. I'll be dead before I let them have these plans.
  • Silverstealth: "Just be careful that doesn't end up a self-induced prophecy."
  • King Albert: "Well it was a metaphorical saying, of course. Your welcome to leave now, LT."
  • Silverstealth: Sure. Just, don't f*** this up.
  • King Albert: I WON'T!
  • Silverstealth: SURE you won't.
  • King Albert: What, you don't have faith?
  • Silverstealth: Given what happened to us recently, faith is sort've subjective. (He left)
  • King Albert:... I'll show him. I can take them out with one wing tied behind my- (Sheila came out and tied one wing behind his back) AHHH!!
  • Sheila: Oh can you now? Well go ahead and try it. (The rest of the heroes arrived) We're WIIIIDE open!
  • King Albert: GIRLS! Kick their ass, and I'll make love with you all day! (The girls screamed as they fought them)
  • Icky: Okay, one, this feels wrong to fight civilians. But two, we're getting mobbed by girls, so it's not a total disaster. BUT, three, WE'RE TAKEN, SO, IT'S STILL A TOTAL DISASTER!!
  • Iago: LADIES, LADIES, YOU'RE ALL PRETTY!!
  • Byrd: Okay, this is just embarrassing.
  • Bentley: BENTLEY SMASH!
  • Icky: NO, BENTLEY, THEY'RE INNOCENT CIVILIANS! We gotta deal with them another way.
  • Bartholomew:... LOOK! JUSTIN BEIBER!! (All the girls went off in the direction he was pointing)
  • Iago:... I literally can't believe that worked. Also, how do you know who he is?
  • Bartholomew: Saw magazine about him, and how popular he was.
  • Iago:... Wow. You must not have anything much to do, huh?
  • King Albert: UGH! Women! Never send them to do a man's job. Ahem, not meaning to be sexist, alcourse.
  • Sheila: Well the offense is still felt, mate.
  • King Albert: "D'OOOOHHHHH?!"
  • Sheila: What'sa matter, Alb? You look like your wing is tied behind your back- OHHO, WAIT!
  • King Albert: YOU SONS OF BITCHES! I GAVE FAITH TO SILVERSTEALTH I'D TAKE YOU OUT! YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT IT WAS LIKE BEING A LOSER BEFORE THIS?! I HAD ALL THE BITCHES LINING UP! I WAS A PIMP!!
  • Icky: "Hey, typically I avoid ruining a player's fun, but given that your connected to "MT" and that ya just admitted to being a very direct benefactor and aided in hiding stolen stuff, that's where the blue-ball treatment has to come!"
  • King Albert: "Hey in my defense, I'm being a good friend here!"
  • Deepthroat was quietly sneaking towards the guard alarm.
  • Byrd: (He pointed his DX-9s at him)... Don't, even, think about it.
  • Icky: Now, give us those plans, or we're gonna get our wings and/or hands sandy.
  • King Albert: YOU TIED MY WING BEHIND MY BACK! YOU'VE ALREADY BEATEN ME!!
  • Sheila: Then give us those plans.
  • King Albert: NOT LIKE I CAN MOVE RIGHT ANYWAY! (They grabbed it)
  • Sheila: Thanks, mate. And have a nice life. (She kicked him off the castle and into a police carriage run by seals)
  • King Albert: THE F*** DID YOU COME FROM?!? WHY DIDN'T MY GUARDS- (Saw that his crab guards were a beaten up pile of uselessness)..... DAMN HENCHLIST?!
  • Sheila: Buh-bye, mate! And thanks for the plans. (They left)
  • King Albert: NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! THIS IS THE LAMEST WAY FOR A KING TO GO OUT ON?!
  • Sheila: WELL AT LEAST WE DIDN'T KILL YA!
  • Iago: So, where to next?
  • Sheila: I got no clue. Aside from my time with Spyro and Cynder, I ain't been outta Aussie much.
  • Joule: "Well the next plans are held in Faun Island. But be advised that the island is at a bit of a lockdown right now because of implications of a traitor in the royal ranks going on."
  • Icky: "Because OF COURSE that place would be in trouble with royal politics at the moment! Where is this Faun Island?"
  • Joule:... Just a few miles beneath Madagascar.
  • Hunter: Ah, yes, Faun Island. I have been there once. We just have to meet their warrior leader.
  • Bentley:... Who that?

Chapter 4: Faun Island/Joule's Lab Island/Riptocs and Rhynocs

Faun Island

  • A Female Faun in a palace was seen walking about with a stern face as she got into a room filled with Faun and Satyr councilors.
  • Female Faun: ALRIGHT, YOU CAN-EATERS, OUT OF WITH IT!! WHICH ONE OF YA'S THE SELLOUT?!
  • Headmaster Satyr: "Oh come now, Elora, be more trusting of your council, it is none of us."
  • Elora: "CLEARLY it has to be one of you! I entrusted you clowns with the plans and then SUDDENLY that Gecko Deadly Silence manages to get a hold of it and vanished from the island?! I'm investigating this!"
  • Councilor Faun 1: "Oy, aren't we overly dramatic?"
  • Elora: OH SORRY, WHAT?!?
  • Councilor Faun 1: NOTHING, SORRY!
  • Elora: I must remind you I rebuilt this island after the Great Cleansing! I'M THE ONE WHO PROTECTS IT WITH MY LIFE! It's what my parents would've wanted. May they rest in peace in the bowels of the earth.
  • Councilor Faun 2: May we recommend getting Spyro and Cynder? They were a tremendous asset last time.
  • Faun: I already tried. They're occupied. AGAIN! I mean, I'm glad for them for succeeding with that thing they were stuck with for 10 years, but, I wish they find the time to stay in the world all the same!"
  • Councilor Satyr 1: "You know Spyro, Cynder, and the bug are native to this world, right?"
  • Lady Elora: "Yeah, but I hear that they are gonna be a bit busy regardless in Avalar! So all the same, I wished those Lodgers found like, a balance between starting to goof-off more to still being around here!"
  • Councilor Satyr with a stereotypical bad guy's goatee: "Well, not like we can control those misfits. I mean, short of those annoying idiots discovering that the Thieves Guild were having a field day with them being under reconstructing their standards, I supremely doubt that this will be changing anytime soon."
  • Lady Elora: "Hey don't get cocky, Councilor Goat Tee, you're a prime suspect cause.... Oh be honest, THAT STUPID GOATEE MAKES YOU LOOK LIKE A VILLAIN?!"
  • Goat Tee: "(Offended Scoff), Appearancist!"
  • Satyr Councilor 1: Is that even a word?... Oh, whatever, it works.
  • Goat Tee: AHEM! Anyway, that is SO profiling, young lady! Your mother would be ashamed if she were alive to hear you say that. People ALWAYS assume the satyr with a handsome goatee. Because oh what, villains crudely approbated the style? Don't hate the style because some people brought it with them. You're BETTER than that."
  • Lady Elora: "Not just that, honestly. You even DRESSED like a bad guy with that dopey Dracula cape your wearing and that you always theme yourself on red and black?!"
  • Goat Tee: "Didn't it occur to you that red and black are my favorite color/non-color combination? And come on, can't a Dracula Fan cosplay in the iconic cape without being assumed an automatic villain?"
  • Lady Elora: "FOR F***'S SAKE, YOU HAVE A PET SNAKE!!"
  • Goat Tee: "(Goat Tee's snake started to cry) YOU LEAVE SLITHY OUT OF THIS?! Also, very RUDE to snakes, to automatically nominate with evil! It's a hurtful stereotype!"
  • Lady Elora: "YOU SLEEP ON A BED OF SKULLS?!"
  • Goat Tee: "The skulls are not real. They're part of a gothic theme I'm going for."
  • Headmaster Satyr: "Miss Elora, with due respect, don't you think Goat Tee's too easy of a target because of his, albeit odd lifestyles? Shouldn't it be fair to consider where Goat Tee was when the plans went missing?"
  • Lady Elora: "Ugghhh, fine. Where were you Goat?"
  • Goat Tee: "Well if you MUST know, I took my pet to the vet to deal with a very fat rat that got caught in her throat. I've been there from 3:00 to 9:00, well beyond the time the events of the incident took place...."
  • Lady Elora:... (Worried about losing a prime suspect) Can, any of you confirm this? (They all did)... DAMMIIIIIT!!!
  • Goat Tee: Shame on you, Elora. Like I said, your mother raised you better than that.
  • Lady Elora:... I may respect you all for helping me keep this island afloat... But do not, EVER, bring my parents into this! They died as they lived, and to bring their names up in an unrelated conversation, is an INSULT to her grave.
  • Faun Councilor 3: She doesn't even have a gr-
  • Lady Elora: SILENCE! (The councilor winced at that)... Anyone else got something to say?... No?... Good. Now back to the subject that is IMPORTANT here! Someone here betrayed us, and I want to know who. If it wasn't Goat Tee, then who was it? C'mon, anyone got any ideas?
  • Headmaster Satyr: "Have you tried asking who had the plans last?"
  • Lady Elora: And who would that be?
  • Goat Tee:... You.
  • Lady Elora: Say what now?
  • Goat Tee: Yes, if I recall, you had the plans last. You kept them safe in your royal quarters, and yet someone WITH access to said quarters, took it from right out from under your nose. And as we all know, only ONE person can access it.
  • Lady Elora: WHA-, YO-, AR-, ARE YOU ACCUSING ME OF BETRAYING MY OWN HOME?!? HOW DARE YOU?!
  • Goat Tee: Well, you ARE still inexperienced in running Faun Island. The crown was handed to you out of nowhere when Malefor tore apart the world. You were scared, and you also don't completely perform your royal duties. Instead, you spend it doing what you've done before your mother perished: adventure and the wind in your hair. You still do it today, and you even get very frustrated when you have to fulfill your mother's duties. Sounds like the perfect alibi to me.
  • Lady Elora: EXCUSE ME?! TREASON!!! I KNEW IT WAS YOU!
  • Goat Tee: My hooves are clean, your highness.
  • Lady Elora: And yet when I came back in last, I was too tired to even stand and just couldn't do anything but sleep. I was out like a light. How could I POSSIBLY break into my own safe and get those plans?
  • Goat Tee:... I... Okay, look, I thought you were too good to get tired, okay?
  • Lady Elora: WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM, A GOD?!? I HAVE A LIMIT TO MY ENERGY JUST LIKE EVERY MORTAL ON THE FACE OF THIS WORLD!! WE ALL SLEEP FOR A REASON! WITHOUT ANY KIND OF REST, WE'LL BREAK AND DIE!! I'M NO DIFFERENT! I'M A FAUN! I'M NOT MUSCULAR HERE!! LOOK AT ME! AND DON'T YOU DARE TAKE THAT AS AN EXCUSE TO STARE!! YEAH, I'M LOOKING AT MANY OF YOU HERE!! I AM NOT BUILT FOR HIGH ENERGY FOR A LONG TIME!! GOAT TEE, I THINK YOU REALLY ARE THE TRAITOR HERE! SHOW ME THAT CAPE OF YOURS BECAUSE IT FEELS LIKE YOU'RE WEARING IT FOR A REASON! Unless of course, you have something to hide?
  • Goat Tee takes it off no problem and has absolutely nothing to hide.
  • Lady Elora: ".... Aw frick."
  • Goat Tee: "Again, no respect for Dracula fans, I mean, seriously."
  • Satyr Councilor 4: "Wait, but didn't the new servent Red Hairington took the plans to be given a paper bath?"
  • Lady Elora: ".... (Facepalms) UGH?! IT ALWAYS ENDS UP BEING THE SERVANTS INSTEAD?! (Runs off)!"
  • Headmaster Satyr: "..... Ya know, you were awfully quick to have her suspected."
  • Goat Tee: "That was mostly just me getting back at her for myself being accused. It's just hilarious to get her riled up sometimes."
  • Headmaster Satyr: Well that was a real dick move, even with her accusation in mind.
  • Goat Tee: Hey, it's all apart of the "What goes around, Comes Around" Effect."

Red Harrington's Room

  • Lady Elora: (Burst in) ALRIGHT, RED, GET OUT HERE OR YOUR NAME WILL BE ACCURATE!!
  • A Red-haired Satyr fell down the stairs to his bed quarters in a panic!
  • Satyr: "DAH-DO-DAH-DO-OW-OH-BAH-EEEEK?! (Smacks face-first on the floor) BLOOWCH?!"
  • Lady Elora: "Pick yourself up, Red!"
  • Red did so!
  • Red: "Your highness, may I ask for why your so distressed?"
  • Lady Elora: OH DON'T PLAY DUMB WITH ME, RED! YOU TOOK THOSE INDESTRUCTIBLE LAMP PLANS FOR A PAPER BATH?!
  • Red:... I don't recall.
  • Lady Elora: DON'T 'I DON'T RECALL' ME!
  • Red: I just did, because I didn't take it. I did exactly what you ordered me to do with them.
  • Lady Elora: Bulls***, you're lying to me.
  • Red: Well, go see for yourself, Lady Elora!
  • Lady Elora: Okay, I will! In 12 seconds, you'll be saying-

12 seconds later...

  • Red: I told you so.
  • Lady Elora: WHA-WHA-WHA, I DON'T UNDERSTAND! GRUFFER TOLD ME THAT YOU HAD THE PLANS FOR A PAPER BATH! He said that YOU were the traitor.
  • Red:... And you ACTUALLY believed him, huh?
  • Lady Elora:... THAT CONNIVING SON OF A GOAT AND ZOOPHILE!!
  • Red: Yeah, what an asshole, pinning ME for it.
  • Lady Elora: I'm SO sorry for this accusation, Red.
  • Red: It's alright, it wouldn't be the first time, and it won't be the last. Everyone blames me for everything. Now go get that goatf****r- (She was gone) AND you're already gone.

Outside Palace

  • Gruffer: HAHAHAHAHAHA! (He was running quick with the plans) WHAT A SUCKER, JUST LIKE HER MOTHER! (He approached some thieves)
  • Thief 1: ABOUT TIME! I thought we'd NEVER get this damn thing!
  • Gruffer: "Well just be glad you did get them!"
  • Thief 1: "I suppose this means a reward's due now. (Pulls out a large bag of coins). For all the trouble ya went through, ya old goat!"
  • Gruffer: "Oh hardy har-har! It's to laugh! Now hurry up and give me the loot and then get out of here!"
  • Thief 1: We are. Just don't rush us. Your precious ruler sounds like the kind of woman who won't take betrayal lightly.
  • Gruffer: Pssh, I kept her busy enough for me to high tail it out. She's just a kid. You REALLY think that old slowpoke of a 'woman' is gonna- (He was baffled to find Lady Elora running straight for him at high speed)
  • Lady Elora: AaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA'AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA'AAAH!!!
  • Gruffer: CRAPCRAPCRAPCRAPCRAP!! GIMME THE MONEY! NOWNOWNOWNOWNOW!!!
  • The Thieves bumbled with the money!
  • Gruffer: "HURRY IT UP?!"
  • Suddenly, Elora suddenly jumped into the air as everything slowed down in dramatic slow-motion!
  • Lady Elora started to flip in slow-motion up to 14 times, which likely was rapidly in normal speed, then was noted to point her hooves straight out for a torpedo-kick as in slow-motion, it was seen targeting for Gruffer's face!
  • Gruffer: "(Slow-motion) HURRRRRRRY-ITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT-UPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP- (Lady Elora's hooves hit Gruffer in the face) OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH?!"
  • The Thieves stared blankly as they were still in normal motion while Elora and Gruffer were in slow-motion.....
  • Thief 2: "..... Uhhhh..... Why are they moving so slowly?"
  • Thief 4: "Cause it makes what just occurred look alot more cinematic."
  • Thief 3: "Well that and it's a time glitch that sometimes happens when something fast-motioned occurs."
  • Saldaron appears.
  • Saldaron: "Here, let me fix that."
  • Thieves: "NO WAIT DON'T-" (He resumed the normal speed getting Elora to kick everyone's butt)
  • Lady Elora: Play ME for a fool, will you, ugly?!
  • Gruffer: C'mon, Elora, this is just a prank. I'm luring these guys here so we can bust them.
  • Lady Elora: You expect me to believe THAT?! (He kicked him in the groin)
  • Gruffer: AAAUUUUAAAAHHHH, MY TENDERS!!!
  • Lady Elora continues to beat up the group!
  • Faun guards showed up shortly and saw that....
  • Faun Guard 1: ".... (Quietly) Sometimes I wonder what's the point of having guards if Lady Elora does all the fun stuff herself?"
  • Lady Elora: BECAUSE NEXT THING YOU KNOW- (Elora gets bashed in the back of the neck)... This... Happens. (She fell to the ground)
  • Remaining Thief: YOU MISSED ONE, GOAT-WOMAN!
  • ???: Where's the Thieves' Guild?
  • Remaining Thief: WHAT?!? Who said tha- (Icky, Iago, and their comrades appeared)
  • Icky:... Where, is, the Thieves' Guild?
  • Remaining Thief: Aw, SON OF A B- (He was turned into a goat)
  • Faun Guard 1:... SERIOUSLY?!? WE COULD'VE TAKEN HIM!
  • Faun Guard 2:: "Let it go."
  • Elora barely got barely with a pained neck....
  • Lady Elora: "Owwwwwww. My neck. I know they're called "Thieves", but did they had to cheat too? Whoever you guys are, thanks for, (Sees the goat).... Doing THAT to the guy, for, some reason."
  • Icky: That's how they conceal their hideout. We just turned it into a weakness.
  • Iago: REALLY shoulda thought that one through. MT is such a moron.
  • Elora:... Okay. Uh, Hunter, who are these guys?
  • Hunter: Icky and Iago of the Shell Lodge Squad. They're here to help us with the Thieves Guild. They say they're going to raid MoneyBanks for some plot involving these indestructible lamps.
  • Elora: Well, that explains why thieves have become an issue lately.
  • Sheila: I'll say, mate, that's an understatement. They're REALLY getting on every bloke's nerves.
  • Elora: PRETTY sure THAT is an understatement.
  • Sheila: Psh, like you can describe it better.
  • Joule: Everyone, focus. We got all of the copies, so we must head back to my labs.
  • Icky: "Sure thing Professor."
  • Joule: "Just one thing though. I do have to warn you all about a uh.... Room-mate situation I have in my island lab."

Joule's Island Lab.

  • Tech Pirates were seen invading the island.
  • Tech Pirate Captain: "Alright boys, here we are! The island of Professor Joule! Now we can swoop in and take the blasted fool's technology! We'll make a fortune out of them!"
  • The Tech Pirates cheered!
  • ???: "Oh I'm sorry, I don't think roomie gave you MORONS permission to be here?!"
  • A Monkey in a strange spandex and a ray gun showed up!
  • Monkey: "So, I'm gonna have to ask you guys to leave."
  • Tech Pirate Captain: "..... (Laughs!) Oh how cute?! It's one of Joule's test monkeys! Someone get me a banana so I can feed it! (He and the other Tech Pirates laugh their asses off!)"
  • Monkey: You might wanna back off, buster. I can kill ya in an instant.
  • Tech Pirate Captain: Oh, can you? (They laughed) Yeah, right. You and what army?
  • Monkey:... AGENTS I-VIII, ASSEMBLE! (8 more test monkeys appeared in similar outfits and weaponry)
  • Tech Pirate #1: WHAT THE F-?!?
  • Monkey #1: OOOOHOHOHOHOHOHO, YOU'RE GOING DOWN, BOYS!!
  • Monkey #2: WE GONNA DO SO MANY THINGS TO YA WITH OUR POO!
  • Monkey: AGENT V! What did I say about doing primitive things?
  • Agent V: Well, sorry, IX! We're monkeys.
  • Agent IX: Ain't no-thing like us, except us.
  • Monkey #3: Uh, actually, genetically-altered primates are a dime a dozen. Humans ARE primates too-
  • Agent IX: SHUT UP, AGENT I! LET'S JUST KICK THESE GUYS' ASSES!!!
  • Tech Pirate Captain: "..... Is it, possible to offer bananas as peace tributes if you let us leave unharmed in return? We won't even go after the tech anymore, so-"
  • Agent IX: Oh, bananas? Really? You think you can buy us with bananas? What do you take us for, idiots?
  • Monkey #4: You stereotypical types make us sick.... SICK!!! (They all aimed their blasters at them)
  • Tech Pirate #2:... Ahhhh, f*** me with a banana- (They fired and turned them into piles of ash that ran away cartoonishly)
  • Agent IX: YEAH, YOU BETTER SLITHER AWAY!!!
  • The ashed up Tech Pirates retreated back on the boat and rowed off!
  • Tech Pirate 5's voice: "I TOLD YA GUYS WE SHOULD'VE GONE TO FUTURASIA?!"
  • Agent V: ".... Another set of Tech Pirates, busted." (The heroes appeared)
  • Icky:... THIS is your roommate? Nine crazy monkeys?
  • Joule: They're actually, creations of mine. A method of engineering bodyguards for me against people who want to steal my technology... Or at least, until they got some good graces with Interpol. These are Agents I-IX. The leader is IX.
  • Agent IX: Hello, father. You're just in time to watch us moon those tech pirates away!
  • Agent V: I still say we can throw poo at them from this distance.
  • Agent IX: NO!
  • Sheila: Crikey. These monkeys, are CRAAAAAZY!
  • Agent VII: WHO ARE YOU CALLING CRAZY, GIRL?!?
  • Sheila: N-N-NOT ME!!
  • Agent VII: Yeah, I f*****g thought so. Better watch that nose of yours next time, kangaroo.
  • Icky: "I can only imagine what the process was that made these guys what they are now."
  • Joule: Well, a monkey's mind IS a mischievous one.
  • Agent III: It's true. As genetically-altered monkeys, we still have a monkey's need for mischief. It's kinda in our nature.
  • Agent II: But we love it. It makes us good agents.
  • Agent I: But subtlety is still lacking.
  • Agent IX: Subtlety is for weenies, anyway.
  • Icky: Well, I guess you guys COULD help us guard the copies for the indestructible lamp project.
  • Agent IX: Oh, so you finally got them back. Took you long enough.
  • Agent VI: So, what do we do with them? Burn them?
  • Agent II: Pretty sure yes. What do you think, boss?
  • Agent IX: Yeah, these plans are better off burned.
  • Icky: "Well thank goodness you guys are on-board with the plan, now let's"-
  • Suddenly, the entire group were hit with a smoke bomb!
  • While everyone was coughing, DS swooped in and took all the plans and vanished into the shadows.
  • Joule: "OH NO?! SOMEONE TOOK THE PLANS?! (COUGHS)?!"

Elsewhere.

  • Silverstealth and some thieves were waiting as DS arrived to them.
  • Silverstealth: "Ya know, we wanted to have these things destroyed anyway, so would it not benefit us for the Misfits to destroy them?"
  • DS: "Yes, but they would've spared parts of these plans that would be beneficial for a revisement. With all of it gone, there would be no back-up plan."
  • Silverstealth: ".... Ahhh. Guess that's why we hired ya. Goldloot would've been impressed with you. (Angerly) When I get my oddly robe-covered mits on those misfits, being the basis for my promotion aside, I'm gonna make them, the Kangaroo especially, pay for failsafing Goldloot!"
  • DS: "I would have to advise against getting too emotional about your mentor. He would want the mission to be kept stable."
  • Silverstealth: "Ahem, right, right, fair enough. Alright gang, we're out of here." (They left)

Lab

  • Icky: DAMMIT! WE WERE SO CLOSE!!! SOMETHING TELLS ME THAT THEY HAD THE ONE FRIEND THAT KNEW WHAT HE WAS DOING!!
  • Iago: THOSE DIRTY CHEATERS!!!
  • Joule: HOW DID THEY GET PAST MY DEFENSES?!?
  • Agent IX: It's VII'S FAULT! HE SPILLED COFFEE OVER THE CONTROL PANELS FOR SECURITY!
  • Agent VII: SNITCH!
  • Agent IX: YOU WANNA GO?!? (They both let out monkey shrieks at each other)
  • Joule: ENOUGH! Both of you!
  • Sheila: What do we do now, mates?
  • Bianca: The only thing we CAN do. We have to find the Thieves' Guild's true location.
  • Joule: Well, that's easy. I DO have the tracking device for the smartpaper those plans used- (He found it was destroyed)... WHAT?!?
  • Icky: You were saying?
  • Bentley: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUAAAAAAAHHH!!!
  • Byrd: Those thieves are GOOD learners.
  • Elora: Looks like we'll have to find them the old-fashioned way. (Everyone groaned)
  • Hunter: She's right. The Thieves Guild will not allow us to win unless we find where they are.
  • Icky: BUT WE CAN'T JUST ASK ONE! YOU SAW WHAT HAPPENS WHEN WE DO THAT!
  • Hunter: Who said we needed to ask them? All we have to do is follow their activity and see where exactly it leads them.
  • Joule: Good thinking, Hunter.
  • Byrd: How long will THAT take?
  • Hunter: "Depends.... Icky, Iago, tell us how this venture had started."
  • Icky: "Well it all started when me and Iago tried to stop those yuts from robbing a bank, and then Gee-Gee turned us to sheep, which resulted in us being discovered by the fairies and how we helped out their problem from being turned into pets by this parrot that can pass as being related to Arpeggio."
  • Byrd: "(Sternly) Count Winnipeggus."
  • Icky: "Is he a rival of yours like French Vulture was?"
  • Byrd: "More like a disgrace to bird kind. I suggest we confront him FIRST!"
  • Hunter: "Fair enough, but remember it's to ask him what he knows. I have to ask you from refraining from getting too rough with him without reason."
  • Icky: Please, you're looking at the experts of good cop and bad cop- (Gets hit by random produce as boos were heard)...... Ohhh, right. Cops have a bad name as of recently.... AGAIN! Ahem! Okay, rephrase! We're experts at, interrogation?
  • Audience member voice 1: "Ehh, it's passable."
  • Iago: "..... Yeeeeaaaah, I'm getting why PTE tries to avoid being relevant to modern topics."
  • Icky: "Can you NOT give them free advertisement, Iags?!"
  • Iago: SORRY! Ugh. Things like this are so annoying. Cops can't exist anymore because of SOME modern topics made em look like assholes, and because SOME people are super-sensitive like they belong on the Internet to begin with.
  • Icky: Hey, let's not go that far, it's just at least until the infamy dies down. Never know if it's permanent.
  • Byrd: WILL YOU STOP TALKING LIKE THAT?!?
  • Icky: Like what?!?
  • Byrd: LIKE THIS IS SOME DUMB CARTOON SHOW!!
  • Icky:... We haven't got the heart nor the level of spite to tell'em. Okay, look, let's just go get those plans back.
  • Bartholomew: AAAAAAAAASSHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLES!!
  • Bianca: STOP SAYING THAT!
  • Byrd: "(Sighs), This is gonna be awkward to cover in briefing."
  • Icky: Hey, bright side and best-case scenario, we all laugh and have a good time. Lord KNOWS you military types need the laughs.
  • Byrd sighs.

Meanwhile...

  • Winnipeggus: (He was in a cage that the fairies literally made his size as he was stuffed in it)... YOU FAIRIES HAVE NO SENSE OF SCALE, DO YOU?!?
  • Fairy: "What're you talking about? We made it just about your size."
  • Winnipeggus: "JUST BECAUSE IT'S AROUND MY EXACT SIZE DIMENSION DOESN'T MEAN THIS SHOTTY THING FITS LIKE A GLOVE?! EVEN PARAKEETS NEED TO BE GIVEN MORE ROOM THEN THIS!!"
  • Fairy: Well sorry, it's just, we rarely do justice for big guys like you since... Well... Since Spyro and Cynder. (Icky, Iago, and the others teleport in)
  • Icky: SO good that we don't need the van for this.
  • Zoe: Faire, how's Winnipeggus settling?
  • Faire: "Well-"
  • Iago: OHHO MY GOSH, DID YOU STUFF HIM IN A CAGE HIS SIZE?! AAAAAHAHAHAAAA, THAT IS PRICELESS!!!
  • Bentley: (Pounds the ground) HAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!!
  • Faire: ".... Well, the birdbrains had been gone since they helped us trounced the black market pet trade and suddenly they made more friends in a matter of.... (Relooks Script)..... 4 Chapters."
  • Icky: "You would be amazed on the things we end up getting done without even trying to get done."
  • Iago: WWAAAAIIIIT... Did you just... Break the fourth wall?
  • Faire: "YOU WANT TO TALK TO THE GUY OR WHAT?!"
  • Icky: BITCH, DON'T TELL US WHAT TO DO! JUST ASK!! WE WERE GONNA DO IT ANYWAY!! Sheesh, women.
  • Faire: Watch it, birdbrain.
  • Icky: I'm not the birdbrain, HE'S the birdbrain.
  • Winnipeggus: MUCH OF US ARE BIRDS, MORON!
  • Icky: (He slaps him in the beak) NO SPEAKING UNLESS SPOKEN TO, BITCH! Now, what do you know about the Thieves' Guild?
  • Winnipeggus: "Oh, so that's what this visit was about? And here I thought it was becaue you missed me- (Icky aggressively grabbed him with Iago)"
  • Icky/Iago: "ANSWER THE QUESTION, PUNK!!"
  • Winnipeggus: "DUUUUH!!! PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE?! I'M TOO MINOR OF A BENEFACTOR OF HAVE TOO MUCH KNOWLEDGE ANYWAY?! AND EVEN IF I DID KNEW ANYTHING, WOULD GEE NEE STILL LEAVE ME NORMAL AS IS AND NOT HAVE DONE ANYTHING TO KEEP ME SILENT FOREVER, LIKE, TURNING ME INTO A STATUE YOU OR PLACE IRREMOVABLE DUCT-TAPE ON MY MOUTH?!"
  • Icky: "..... Then do you know anyone who does have that info better than the other guys?"
  • Winnipeggus: "Well, I heard only of rumors about Master Thief being friends with that balonious "King of Beaches", but he's too loyal to Said Master Thief to ever cough up anything?!"
  • Icky: "Oh what a co-winky-dink, the script did say he was MT's personal pal! That means we can skip the other dudes and get STRAIGHT to him."
  • Byrd: "Wait, but wouldn't Gee Nee aim to ensure he's incapable of speaking as well given what Winnipeggus said?"
  • Silence......

Later...

  • King Albert: (He was turned into an unsentient albatross)... KAWWWWK!
  • Byrd: UGH, WE'RE TOO LATE!!
  • Icky: OH MY GOD, NOW THESE THIEVES ARE STARTING TO PISS ME OFF!!!
  • Sheila: Well, you REALLY expect them to make it easy for us? Would they even BE this good if they-
  • Icky: NOT HELPING!
  • Iago: THIS IS ALL JUST A GAME TO THEM AT THIS POINT! AND AT THIS POINT, THEY'RE LAUGHING AT US LIKE ASSHOLES!
  • Bartholomew: AAAAA-
  • Icky/Iago: SHUT UP!!!
  • Bartholomew:... Sorry.
  • Icky: SERIOUSLY, HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO GET TO THOSE DAMN THIEVES IF WE CAN'T GET INFORMATION ON THEM?!?
  • Iago: IT'S HOPELESS! THEY HAVE A GODDAMN FREE GENIE! THEY'RE PRACTICALLY UNSTOPPABLE!
  • Zoe: I'm sure you'll think of something. Besides, SOME of us have magic. We can just transform him back.
  • Bianca: No, we can't, because if we could, Gee Nee would've thought of that.
  • Zoe: F***, you're right!
  • Icky:... Well, I'm out of ideas. We officially lost. What a wonderful attempt to-
  • Hunter: AHEM! There IS another way.
  • Icky:... Okay, Hunter. What do we do?
  • Hunter: Is it not obvious? We just intercept the Thieves' master heist at MoneyBanks HQ.
  • Iago: And how do we know they won't expect us? We CLEARLY established that they're too smart for us.
  • Hunter: ".... We could try to capture another key figure not readily a member but is also connected to them."
  • Icky: "Well we pretty much nailed the majority of them and the biggest one is turned into a normal bird, so-"
  • Hunter: "There might be someone who always has the what's what in the criminal underworld, and is perhaps the slimiest of the slimy."

Elsewhere.

  • Dragon Realms' "Gamble City" was seen as alot of questionable gamblings go on.
  • A Slimy Eel in a fancy Zoot-Suit was seen holding a creature fight as alot of gamblers were seen making bets! The Creatures in question are a pack of magical hounds Vs an Ent like Arbor.
  • Slimy Eel: "Place yer bets, place yer bets, boys! Arbor Jr. vs. a pack of Hound-manas, who would win, who would win, place yer bets!"
  • Gambler 1: "This fight betta not be rigged, Slimeo Slimeyson."
  • Slimeo Slimeyson: "What? Me? Rig a fight? I would nev- I would NEVER rig a fight in front of my favorite customers."
  • Gambler 1: Well, you have been known to do that when it suits you. And given, I overheard that you bet against your friend out there, you're trying to get him to win.
  • Slimeo Slimeyson: WHAT?! I WOULD, NEVER, BET AGAINST MY FRIEND!
  • Gambler 1: You would if you wanted to help him win. It's a classic gambling move for friends. You bet against them to up the stakes and give them a great reward.
  • Slimeo Slimeyson: Okay, listen here, asshole, you obviously misheard that.
  • Gambler 1: Now, it's understandable you'd deny it. If he heard it too early, he'd be mad at you.
  • Slimeo Slimeyson: OKAY, I'VE OBVIOUSLY OVERSTAYED MY WELCOME!
  • Gambler 2: HE ADMITS IT!
  • Slimeo Slimeyson: NO I DIDN'T! I SAID I OVER-STAYED MY WELCOME?! IT'S NOT THE SAME AS CONFESSING TO AN IMPLIED ACT OF CHEATING, OF WHICH THERE'S NONE?!
  • Gambler 3: No, but to someone who's got secrets as plain as the nose on their face, it's the same as saying you admit it.
  • Slimeo Slimeyson:... Okay, look, fine, I admit it, but can you blame me? He's going in over his head, and he's not ready for this kind of thing. I can get him another chance at a better time. All I need to do is have him lose, and when those guys I made the bet with lose it and give us those $10000, we can help him out.
  • Gambler 1: See? Was that so hard? But don't worry. Your secret is safe with us. (Suddenly, Icky, Iago, and their group teleport in and end up causing Slimeo's friend to lose)
  • Ringleader: 1, 2, 3, YOU'RE OUT!
  • Slimeo: YEE- WAIT... WHAT JUST HAPPENED?!?
  • Gambler 3: "Wait a freaking minute, IS TWO OF THOSE GUYS THE LOUGER'S BIRDBRAINS?!"
  • Gambler 6: "OUT HERE?! I THOUGHT THEY WERE ALREADY TAKING ANOTHER BREAK GOING OFF WORLD BY NOW?!"
  • Gambler 7: "AMSCRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!?"
  • The Gamblers made a run for it!
  • Slimeo: "Crap, crap, CRAP?! (Slithers off as well!)"
  • Icky: OH NO YOU DON'T! (He stepped him in place as he screamed and tried to run pathetically)
  • Iago: You have some questions to answer regarding the Thieves Guild!
  • Sheila: They have been causing a LOTTA hogwash in our lands, mate.
  • Bianca: And we aren't having it.
  • Slimeo: I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT!
  • Byrd: Oh, is that right? Hunter here says you've had a lot of tie-ins with them. What do you know about their plans to rob MoneyBanks HQ?
  • Slimeo: "I value my life too much to be a snitch, especially if we're talking about THE Thieves Guild! Ya know what MT's Girlfriend does to schmoes that even have so much as a MINOR idea what's going on with them and they start being Canaries on them?! Not pleasant stuff?! Not even long-time members are spared, much less outsider schmucks like me that knows from anonymous outsider sources!!"
  • Byrd: "Very well, then let your self-preservation desires direct you to direct US to these outsider sources?!"
  • Slimeo: "Hey back up, I'm half-hag fish, I can produce so much icky slime, it'll be enough to fill up to an army's worth of buckets?!"
  • Icky: "(Shows that he has enough buckets to prepare) Try us, slimy!"
  • Slimeo: "Duh..... HOW DID YOU GET SO MANY BUCKETS ON SHORT NOTICE?!"
  • Zoe: Magic, duh.
  • Slimeo:... Ugh! Now I'm wishing we're back in the Magic Drought. People these days are using it to cheat.
  • Icky: Now, are you going to tell us about these plans, or do we have to get... Slimy?... Wow, that sounded more badass in my head. Point is, it's not gonna be pretty for ya if ya don't co-operate!
  • Slimeo:... (Sighs) If I do this, you have GOT to protect me from the rage Gee Nee is gonna be in.
  • Icky: No promises, considering she's a genie.
  • Slimeo:... (Sighs) Whatever holy one is out there, give me strength.

MoneyBanks Mansion, DR England

  • Icky:... So THIS is MoneyBanks HQ?
  • Slimeo: MoneyBanks MANSION is more like it. But people like to call it the Moneybags Mansion. As we all know-
  • Icky: Uh, no, you don't need to use the laziest method of exposition ever to tell us what this is. MoneyBanks is the currency master schmoes of this world. EVERYBODY knows that, you don't have to repeat it.
  • Byrd: Okay, at the end of this, we need to give you two therapy.
  • Iago: We'll pretend we didn't hear that.
  • Bentley: You kinda did. You responded to it.
  • Icky:... Let's just get through this. (They rang the doorbell as a small bear came)
  • Small Bear:... Who the deuce are you all?
  • Icky:... Who the DEUCE are YOU?!
  • Small Bear:... Minibags? Sir Moneybags' nephew? Don't you putzes know anything?
  • Bartholomew:... The heck is a putz?
  • Minibags:... Okay, I'm not getting paid enough for crazy. UNCLE MONEYBAGS! WE GOT GUESTS!!
  • ???: UH, DASH IT ALL, MORE?!? MY BUSINESS IS GOING BANKRUPT ALREADY WITH ALL THE THIEVES MUCKING ABOUT MY BANKS, NOW I GOT GUESTS?! (A large bear in a suit appeared) If you want a meeting, you'll have to pay for it like everyone else-.... Uh... Minibags, you DO know who these guys are, right?
  • Minibags: Uh, no. Just a random group of animals?
  • Moneybags: (Sighs) This is Icarus and Iago of the Shell Lodge Squad, AND these are the other friends of Spyro and Cynder.
  • Minibags:... You mean those dragons you were extorting before you founded this whole capitalist shebang?
  • Moneybags: Do NOT remind me, nephew! They are welcome free of charge! A today-special in that it so happens I have a crisis to settle! Come. (They entered into a fancy sparkling mansion as they saw a white fat cat that meowed) TOKEN! Move it, confound you!
  • Sheila:... Cute cat, mate.
  • Moneybag: "Yes, he's an adorable cat, but is the epiphany of the stereotype of cats being lazy and unproactive."
  • Icky: "Might've helped if he was given a healthier diet, mack."
  • Moneybags: ".... Huh. I guess my butlers and maids were right about that. Something to consider after this crisis is dealt with and I get my business back on track."
  • Icky: "Speaking of that crisis, we happen to be in the midst of facing it."
  • Moneybags: "Understandably so, all things considered. I heard about the turnaround with the Indestructible Lamp and plans for revisement. It made the personal funding of that project expensive. Clearly those Thieves got wise to it somehow."
  • Iago: "Probably can't be helped given that it's a project for a lamp that can't let Genies be free even by wish."
  • Minibags: "Told you so, Uncle."
  • Moneybags: "You don't have to be a smart-mouth, Minibags."
  • Icky: And for the record, my name's not Icarus. It's Icky.
  • Moneybags: "Yes, but Icarus just sounds more, dignified. Can't a gentleman not refer to one in a sophisticated manner these days?"
  • Icky: "..... Okay, fair enough. It's at least a step above Shen calling me "Prehistoric One" like a habit of calling folks by traits."
  • Moneybags: Indeed. (Deep breath) I swear, this thief crisis is going to dent my wallet.
  • Elora: We're terribly sorry, Sir Moneybags.
  • Moneybags: Someone must.
  • Hunter: But we might just have a means to end it. We have word that they're coming here.
  • Moneybags:... WHATEVER FOR?!?
  • Icky: That's what we're going to find out.
  • Moneybags:... If that's the case, why aren't the rest of the Lodgers here?
  • Iago: Occupado. They're dealing with some... Changing their identities since Kairi's grown up. AND they're helping Kairi move back to Destiny Islands with Sora.
  • Moneybags:... Oh my, congratulations.
  • Icky: You haven't heard? Aren't you rich? Don't you have TV?
  • Moneybags: Well, sorry. I have been too distracted by the thief crisis.
  • Iago: It's been around since BEFORE that.
  • Moneybags: Well I AM the president of MoneyBanks. You need to keep in mind that it's difficult to keep up with current events when you have to worry about business structure. I don't even know of things that happened after the year 2012 and I'm still only keeping up with years 2013 through 2016.
  • Icky: ".... Wow. You litterally made yourself so busy that you didn't kept track with LITTERALLY the last decade?"
  • Moneybags: "Fair's fair, I'm a man, well, bear, married to his work."
  • Iago: "Well, advice for the future mack, it's equally a good business practice to keep up with current events, ergo, so you'll know to prepare for any surprises like the Thieves' Guild or likewise groups."
  • Moneybags: "Well, you barely even interacted with my nephew all that much and already you sound just like him."
  • Icky: Really? Then he must obviously get around.
  • Minibags: Oh, I do. Uncle Moneybags DOES have a family of his own, with 4 screaming kids that I can't really stand.
  • Token: Meow.
  • Minibags: Yeah, and SOME of them don't know how to interact with a cat. Kids are so stupid.
  • Zoe: Underdeveloped child minds are not the same as stupid.
  • Minibags: Well if left unchecked, it might as well be synonymous.
  • Zoe: Well, if that's what you think, I'm sure YOU'LL be getting laid in college.
  • Moneybags: So, um, what were we talking about?
  • Token: Meow.
  • Moneybags: Oh, yeah. WHAT ABOUT THIS MASTER HEIST THOSE DIRTY THIEVES ARE DOING?!
  • Icky: Don't worry, we have a plan. And it's actually WAAAAY too easy. You just need to shout into some massive sirens "Where is the Thieves Guild?".
  • Moneybags:... How will that help? They're likely to not tell us.
  • Sheila: Asking for it's location is a trigger to convert Thieves back to their true forms: basic animals.
  • Moneybags:... Those Thieves, were animals, TURNED into Thieves?!
  • Sheila: You got it. And we can use that as a weapon.
  • Moneybags:... Your underestimated brilliance, knows NO bounds. I can see why the Villain League is so frustrated about losing to you guys inspite of your lack of serious nature.
  • Icky: "Ya only scratched the surface of that rabbit hole, M.B."
  • Bianca: Ehh, I wouldn't say that in front of-
  • Icky: Oh, grow some thicker skin, bunny.
  • Bianca: AAAND I wouldn't call specifically ME that in specifically THAT way-
  • Icky: Oy, I swear, language is getting dirtier and dirtier these days.
  • Moneybags: Shame you weren't born in jolly old England.
  • Icky: Yeah, I was born on a prehistoric planet, WHILE IAGO WAS BORN ON A WORLD WITH STRICT SHARIA LAW!!
  • Moneybags:... Goodness.
  • Icky: Yeah, so, you're not exactly helping.
  • Sheila: OY! Can we PLEASE commence with the plan here?!
  • Elora: Someone FINALLY said it!
  • Icky: We were GONNA!
  • Elora: Well, you snooze you lose.
  • Hunter: "Ahem! Back on topic, for real?"
  • Icky: We were getting to THAT too. It's simple. We just wait for them to show up, and when we get the signal, then we yell the trigger question into whatever loudness device we have available. POOF! They're all animals again.
  • Moneybags:... And it stands to reason, that if we do the same thing to every other bank I own in the Dragon Realms, then we can finish off most of the Thieves Guild.
  • Icky: EXACTLY!
  • Bentley: BRILLIANT!... Wow. First elaborate word me-used. Me getting good at speaking good.
  • Byrd: Then what are we waiting for? Let's get to work.
  • Icky: "ANNNNND CUE MONTAGE MUSIC!!"
Believe it or not I'm walking on air

Believe it or not I'm walking on air

Later...

  • Most of the Thieves Guild members have turned back into animals.
  • Moneybags: "My goodness, I could open a zoo with all these creatures!"
  • Icky: Haha! IS THIS REALLY THE BEST YOU THIEVES GOT?!? C'MON, I THOUGHT YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE EXPERTS!!
  • Silverstealth was seen at a hidden ditch with remaining Green Robed Thieves....
  • Silverstealth: "..... Bring in, the big guy."
  • Icky and Iago were doing a celebratory dance as the others noticed thief-copters flying in with a big cage!
  • Moneybags: ".... Uh, Icarus, you, may want to see this...."
  • Icky: "Oh what are those yuts doing this- (Sees the giant cage)..... Tiiiiiiime?"
  • The Thief Copters placed the cage down and flew off, as apawn so, the cage bursted open, revealing a monster similar to Executioner.
  • Silversstealh: "(Was seen in one of the thief copters) (With Megaphone) May we introduce, MARMAUDER?!"
  • The Monster, Marmauder, roared a titanious battle cry!
  • Icky: "..... (Unsure now) Okay, admittingly, that is more or less abit better!"
  • Moneybags: "I, don't believe the failsafe would work on this creature since it's not technically a true member! More of a, trump card monster if anything!"
  • Bentley: "Ohhhhh! Me was getting bored! That guy look fun to fight!"
  • Icky: Well, glad we got you. Kick his ass.
  • Bentley: WITH PLEASURE! RAAAAAAAAUAAUAUAAAA!!! (He leaped out and attacked him with his ice club, which Marmauder just shattered by catching and crushing it)... Whoa! (Marmauder smacked him into a tree)... RAAAAAHHHHHH!!!! (He attacked, but the Marmauder was able to beat him up real easily, getting all the heroes to cartoonishly drop their jaws)
  • Bartholomew: BROTHER!!!
  • Moneybags: PLEASE tell me you have another plan.
  • Icky: UHUHUH, OF COURSE WE DO! Bianca? Do your thing.
  • Bianca: What thing?
  • Icky: YOU KNOW, YOUR MAGIC!
  • Bianca: That armor of his looks like antimagic armor.
  • Icky: IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE DIRECTLY AT HIM, JUST DO IT!!
  • Bianca: ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT! (Focuses for a bit and caused a forest of redwoods to grow instantly in front of Marmauder)..... It won't permanently stop it, but it will slow it down long enough for us to think of something better.
  • Moneybags: "Or better yet, we use this slowdown to evacuate the money!"
  • Icky: Good idea. (They went into the vault and their eyes cartoonishly engorged to see that it was all gone)
  • Moneybags: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!
  • Byrd: DAMMIT! The attack was a distraction.
  • Moneybags: HOW?!? HOW COULD THEY GET PAST MY SECURITY?!? IT'S THE BEST SECURITY TECHNOLOGY MONEY CAN BUY!!
  • Icky: Well, they DO have a genie.
  • Moneybags: OH, OF COURSE THEY HAVE A GENIE!
  • Iago: WELL, YEAH, WHY DID WE FORGET THEY HAVE A GENIE?!?
  • Elora: They just breezed past us without even triggering ANYTHING, and left as fast as they came!
  • Sheila:... So, we can't stop them?
  • Joule: Afraid not. With Gee Nee on their side, they and their strategy are unstoppable. (They went outside and after Bianca undid her redwood spell, they saw that everyone was gone)...
  • Moneybags:... Ballocks!
  • Minibags: Well, we're broke like glass.
  • Icky:... NOW what do we do?! We can't outsmart them, because we're just cartoon goofs!
  • Byrd:... Moneybags? You got any camera footage?
  • Moneybags: OH, OF COURSE!

Later...

  • Everyone: (They saw that the cameras were disabled) AW COME ON!!!
  • Minibags: Okay, what were you expecting from master thieves?!
  • Icky: FANTASTIC! JUST FANTASTIC!
  • Bentley: I THOUGHT THIS WAS BAD!
  • Icky: IT'S CALLED SARCASM!
  • Bentley: What THAT taste like?
  • Icky: Okay, we have GOT to find their master hideout. If they can rob Moneybags' Mansion as quick as a flash, then they can rob anything.
  • Joule: Let's remember, Gee Nee is their biggest defense. We just have to defeat her.
  • Iago: HOW?!? SHE COULD DEFEAT US A THOUSAND TIMES OVER!! And yes, there WAS the Lamp thing, but they managed to swipe the plans from us! And now, added to their Genie, THEY ALSO HAVE THAT ARMORED GOLIATH WITH THEM!
  • Minibags: "Wait, if my history lessons are accurate, that creature looked to be like the Sand King of the Burning Sands Desert, a historic landscape said to be the birthplace of the Great Sand-Bringer Serpent."
  • Icky: "Is that gonna be like Freezar, that angry giant ice serpent who was mad at Christmas Icons making him obscure to the Dragon Realms?"
  • Minibags: "Ehhhhhh, yes, he is bitter of people forgetting about him and the other elemental serpents, but, at worse he just made himself enter hibernation."
  • Icky: "OH THANK CRAP, I WAS WORRIED WE WERE GONNA HAVE ANOTHER GIANT ANGRY SNAKE PROBLEM AGAIN!"
  • Moneybags: "FYI, that time when Freezar attacked wasn't fun for the rest of us neither! So much money had to go into repairs from that one Christmas!"
  • Iago: "So that means he's not gonna be a problem?"
  • Minibag: "Weeeeellllll, provided if he's never disturbed."
  • (Deadpool): "..... Those Thieves are diffidently gonna turn out to be hiding in wherever the giant sand-snake god guy is."
  • Icky: "DON'T GIVE THE PLOT IDEAS, DEADPOOL!?"
  • (Deadpool): C'mon, it's as predictable as the end of Infinity War. We ALL knew Thanos was gonna get all the Infinity Stones BEFORE the movie was announced.
  • Icky: Well... Maybe their home is there.
  • Joule:... In the Gobi Desert. Erm, well, the Dragon Realms Equilant comparison I mean.
  • Icky: And that would be?
  • Joule:... Riptinia
  • Icky/Iago:... Ohhh, boy, not Ripto.
  • Joule: If you mean Ripto Barnabas III, Spyro and Cynder already defeated him when he tried to take over the world.
  • Icky: "Okay good, no headache from him then?"
  • Joule: "Ehhhh, not saying he's dead, more like, trapped in time crystal with his beasts, Crush, Gulp, and that steam-punk Pterasaur with the rocket booster butt, erm, what was that thing's name, err, oh right! Speedbreak!"
  • Icky: "BUUUUUUUT, otherwise, the dude's not gonna be a problem?"
  • Joule: Not as long as those thieves aren't stupid enough to set him free with all the power he has, no. Crush is a pretty nasty troll with a pretty nasty giant mace, Gulp is a giant Dragotaur that can fight against dragons PRETTY brutally, and as for Speedbreak? Well, Ripto had a lot of time taming him. But again, I'm PRETTY certain that those thieves aren't that stupid. Ripto is TOO dangerous. He has killed hundreds of dragons in his time. I mean, he WAS in a time crystal before. He came from a time when dragons were still looking for their niche.
  • Icky: Well, I'm confident even Gee Nee knows better than to mess with a guy like that.
  • Joule: Should. Ripto can sap magic from anyone. He can absorb Gee Nee and use her infinite power to take over the world.
  • Iago: YIKES! Then yes, she SHOULD know how dangerous he is.
  • Icky: But, if he's that dangerous, why didn't anyone just kill him? I mean, normally, that's not how people do this stuff these days, but come on, anyone should know who's too dangerous to stay alive. Someone as greedy and power-hungry as him?
  • Sheila: Look, mate, we got some stuff to do, we don't have time to discuss this. Maybe we can if this pops up again.
  • Joule: C'mon! (He opens up a portal)
  • Zoe:... I got magic.
  • Joule: Hey, give science a chance, will you? Everyone has their specialty, so it'd be rude to leave others out.
  • Zoe: Magic has been around generations before science.
  • Joule: Oh, and how's it been working since the Magic Fritz?
  • Zoe:...
  • Icky: Ouch. Okay, let's go through the portal before-
  • Zoe: ALRIGHT, LISTEN HERE, YOU BLIND LITTLE BUFFOON!! WE IN THE DRAGON REALMS HAVE OUR PRIDE AND TRADITION, AND YOU'D BE WISE TO RESPECT THAT!
  • Joule: Sometimes tradition and pride can be outdated or dangerous. Like right now.
  • Zoe: TRADITION IS EVERYTHING!
  • Joule: Sure, say that when things change too much to keep it.
  • Icky: SHUT UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP!!! (Both of them stopped)... Can we, PLEASE, stop acting like children, and get our asses through this stupid portal?!
  • Joule:... My apologies.
  • Zoe: Sorry.
  • Icky: Too late. Get your asses through.

Riptinia

  • Icky: (They went through the portal to find Riptocs inhabiting cities).... I feel like we're in a cartoon depiction of dinosaurs having societies.
  • Bianca: "These are the Riptocs."
  • Bartholomew: "Gesundheit."
  • Bianca: No, no, that's what they are.
  • Iago:... Don't you mean 'Rhynocs'?
  • Icky: "No Iags, the Rhynocs were the rhino dudes, these are Riptocs, ya know, the one-used bad guys from that DISHASTORIOUS "Enter the Dragon Fly" Game...."
  • Iago: "..... Right. Just clarifying."
  • Sheila: BUT, those guys ARE in a dispute with the Rhynocs of Rhynocia.
  • Iago: Aw, great, it just gets better and better.
  • Icky: With those two races like that, we'll NEVER find those damn thieves.
  • Hunter: "Worry not. We'll just need to be sure to keep out of the conflict and focus on the Guild."
  • Sheila: "Question is, how are we gonna get past these Riptocs? They're not exactly in a friendly mood with outsiders cause of what Spyro and Cynder did to Ripto."
  • Icky: "Ahhhh, no sweat! We'll wear disguises!"
  • Elora: "And what kind of disguise is gonna fool a dinosaurian creature with excellent senses of smell and notorious quickness to pounce at any sign of something unfamiliar?"
  • Icky: "Well, they don't go after each other, right?"
  • Joule: "Ehhhhh, give or take. Riptoc culture is relatively animal-based. They can be territorial in terms of property and females."
  • Icky: "But outside of that, they're cool with other Riptocs, right?"
  • Hunter: "Well depends of the nature of the situation, but, generally at the least they won't think too much of a fellow Riptoc even if they're from out of town."
  • Icky: "Then perfect! We'll disguise ourselves as Riptocs, stroll in unnoticed and look for like, an inside guy who knows anything about the Guild."
  • Byrd: "Riptocs are not known for their patience with any form of questions, especially the kind of questions they think is asking for trouble. I'm positive these reptilians are no stranger to Thieves Guild Shenanigans."
  • Icky: "Then we'll play it safe and keep hidden until we find a Riptoc that isn't gonna rip our heads off for asking that question, even better if he's that AND connected to the Guild, even if indirectly as an outsider dude."
  • Zoe: ".... I'll admit, a decent plan for what is supposed to be one of the local Lodger idiots."
  • Icky: "Ehh, you'd be amazed what being around the smarter Lodgers can do to a guy."
  • Zoe: "Okay, I hope nobody minds scales too much, cause the Riptoc Disguise is going on."
  • MAGIC FLASH!

A Riptoc City

  • The Group, now as Riptocs, walked down an entire city of stone as various dinosaurian creatures and beings made their daily commute, and some cases of Riptocs getting into personal disputes!
  • A Gathering of Riptocs were seen as they were before the steps of an ancient palace as a large time crystal swallowed half of it as three large silhouettes and a raptor-based one were seen inside of it.
  • A robed Troodon-like Riptoc holding a staff with a very tall skull was seen before the crowd.
  • Robed Riptoc: "It has been years since the loss of our glorious King, Ripto, to the dragons! And now, we have been left to suffer the conflict with the guerilla tactics of the Rhynocs ever since! But all is not lost, Riptocs. I, Shaman Reptild, have a solution! A dragon placed Ripto into this inconvenient position..... Who is not to say, that a dragon, can't get him out?"
  • Riptoc 1: "WELL NOT LIKE ANY DRAGON'S STUPID ENOUGH TO FREE OUR KING GIVEN WHAT HE HAS BEEN DOING TO THEM?!"
  • Shaman Reptild: "Ahhh, but who said, it has to be from an already established dragon? I've learned of the origins of a prematurely introduced Scarlet Dragon, the one called, "Quidilen". She was artificially granted being a Scarlet Dragon, by a creature of impressive power. The one called, "Professor Eagle-Beak". (Some Riptocs snickered at the name)..... If he can be able to grant the powers of a Scarlet onto a dragon, then granting the powers of a purple is a small feat by design! And, glorious luck would have it, that genius, just so happened to try and visit us to want to see if our people were interested to play in alien affairs! (Shows the Captured Professor Eagle-Beak along with Sing Jin Sue and Jerky held by restraints)..."
  • Icky Riptoc: "..... (Quietly and in gruff voice) Oh you gotta be freaking kidding me! This yuts, so soon?!"
  • Riptoc Iago: (Same as Icky) We haven't exactly seen him since Ice Valkyrie, really.
  • Riptoc Icky: "(Quietly) I meant while we're in the middle of our mission!"
  • Riptoc Iago: ".... (Quietly) Okay now I get what you meant by that."
  • Sing Jin Sue: "Professor, I don't want to say I told you so-"
  • Professor Eagle-Beak: "THEN KEEP TO THOSE FEELINGS, SING!!"
  • Jerky: "Oh why do I always have to be dragged into these hijinks! Couldn't Xerxes or the Pirate Monkey be good enough for ya?"
  • Shaman Reptild: "(Gestures some Riptoc Soldiers to free Eagle-Beak)..... Now, Professor, here's my proposition. If you can create a purple dragon and have it free our king, I'll, see if I can get him to, humor your little exploits, and have the Riptocs get involved in your, escapades."
  • Professor Eagle-Beak: ".... You need to keep in mind that it's been awhile since I even did something like what I did to Quidilin. Also, my power hasn't, aged well. What I did with Quidilen was back when I was younger, and Tartarus was not kind to my physical form, I-"
  • Shaman Reptild: "Arrangements will be made to make you less of this, pathetic shrill form you possess now. For King Ripto's sake, I will see to that."
  • Professor Eagle-Beak: "Ahem! Even then, I don't even have a means to do such! I don't have an arcane laboratory' like back in Griffinmainia, the right amount of research onto Purple Dragon anatomy, and above all, I DON'T HAVE A DRAGON EGG TO USE SUCH A SPELL FOR, I-"
  • Shaman Reptild: "Expenses will not be spared to provide you what you need, due, to even a simple detail. (Shows that a gang of Riptocs were pulling in cases upon cases of Dragon Eggs).... Freshly contained eggs from my son, and his urm.... "Secret Friends". Plently of test subjects for you, professor...."
  • Professor Eagle-Beak: "..... Good glories, you must really LIKE that guy, do you?"
  • Shaman Reptild: "Our King could've helped us take over this planet and put the dragons and any who opposed the Riptocs into their place! I think you'll find no expense will be spared in freeing him."
  • Professor Eagle-Beak: ".... I'm, weary of this."
  • Shaman Reptild: "I'll sweeten this deal. In addition to what I said, I could see about if King Ripto can make the Scarlet obedient to you again."
  • Professor Eagle-Beak was being tempted by the prospect of getting Qui back....
  • Jerky: "...... He's seriously gonna agree into this because this yuts dragged Qui into this, is he?"
  • Sing Jin Sue: "He's a troubled adoptive father, I'd be more surprised he WOULDN'T accept it."
  • Professor Eagle-Beak: "..... Just keep in mind that this won't be a quickly done process. I need time to prepare the ritual, do the necessary research and have the right settings for even getting the first egg ready for such a test."
  • Shaman Reptild: "So, we have a deal, professor?"
  • Eagle-Beak: I'm not entirely sure about it, but if it's my once-in-a-lifetime chance to get Quidilin back, then I'll take it. HOWEVER, I have heard stories about your king. It'll be hard to trust him.
  • Shaman Reptild: Our king has promised us salvation from the dragons that tear apart the world we stand on. Dragons have always-
  • Eagle-Beak: Okay, I'll stop you right there. I can't exactly trust you with your questionable need for dragons when you clearly hate them. I, am NOT fond of hypocrites.
  • Shaman Reptild: It's not hypocrisy when you must fight fire with fire.
  • Eagle-Beak: Nevertheless. How can I trust you all to keep your deal involving Quidilin if you all hate dragons?
  • Shaman Reptild: Because we are ALWAYS people of our word. To go back on that, would violate our honor. King Ripto expects racial honor in his kingdom, and to break our promise, would disappoint him.
  • Eagle-Beak:... Well, at least your king has some honor in him. But, seriously, you have to swear that Quidilin will come back to me, safe and sound!
  • Shaman Reptild: Yes. But you must take her from the Dragon Realms, because keeping her here would have her share the same fate as other dragons.
  • Eagle-Beak: "Well given that this planet is where the Lougers' residing, even without the implication of genocide, I wasn't planning on making a base here anyway."
  • Jerky: "STILL CAN'T BELEIVE WE'RE STILL STUCK ON BEING BASELESS?!"
  • Shaman Reptild: Ahem, anyway..... Our King has wished dragons destroyed because of the damage they do to the world we live on. They do what they want to the planet, and we have to be caught in the damage. ALL of us. King Ripto had done so before when Malefor was still around, and he was imprisoned. Then he was stopped again by those two dragonlings. Well, not this time. Our King shall be released, and this time, there will be no more lucky defeats.
  • Eagle-Beak: "Again, fair enough, I do normally intent on being as far away from the misfits as possible anyway in looking for a new base."
  • Jokey: "SERIOUSLY, WHY ARE WE STILL LOOKING FOR THAT?!"
  • Sing Jin Sue: "Don't distract the Professor, idiot!"
  • Shaman Reptild: Well, if all the details are clear, then let us progress. You and your uh, compatriots, will be allowed a room in the Primordial Hotel while we begin process on your lab and get the correct amount of details ready. The Dragon Eggs will be held in the hatchery until your new lab is ready."
  • Jerky: "Awwwww sweet! Upgrade! Is this one of those 5-Star places with minty pillows and free towels? And what's the food like for room service? I-"
  • The Guards dragged the restrained duo off as Eagle-Beak was being guided off to where the hotel would be....
  • Riptoc Byrd: ".... (Quietly) I know this is not relevant to the Thieves Guild, but I call this an equal concern."
  • Riptoc Icky: "(Quietly) Then I trust you guys don't mind doing something on the side?"
  • Riptoc Elora: "(Quietly) Primarily because the Thieves are bad enough as is, we don't need a "Return of Ripto" Attempt to happen."
  • Riptoc Byrd: "(Quietly) We'll have to split up. One team contends with the Shaman's son and contends with his claimed "secret friends", while the others seek out that Griffin and his little pets."
  • Riptoc Icky: "(Quietly) Let me and Iags handle Eagle-Beak duty, he's kinda in the Lougers' Rogues Roster, along with Viper's sister and Ol' Jerky. Those three and us go way back."
  • Riptoc Byrd: You said you haven't seen him since an 'Ice Valkyrie'?
  • Icky: Basically, someone from Equestria who used to look up to him. Now, let's stop filling this episode with filler. C'MON!
  • Riptoc Byrd: Again with the weird delusional talk- Ugh, whatever!

Primordial Hotel

  • Eagle-Beak:... Hmm. For prehistoric creatures, these guys seem to have some... Modernization. But perhaps that is because of Mega-Sci Corp. They have been modernizing this world since the Great Cleansing, so, I suppose the splendor is ruined by that tidbit of knowledge.... I... I just hope this is all worth seeing Quidilin again.
  • ???: Oh, it's not, EB. (The Riptoc heroes arrived)
  • Eagle-Beak:... Who are you? Room service? If so, Jerky's room is down the hall, to the-
  • Riptoc Icky: Not Food Service, Professor Daughter-Issues!
  • Eagle-Beak: Well aren't we particularly more impudent then expected standards of these reptilians! And also uniquely wise-crackery, I typically expect that from-... Wait... That voice- AW, GODS DAMMIT, IT'S YOU TWO BIRDBRAINS?! I would assume you had left the world by now to relax again!
  • Riptoc Iago: Yeah, it's us two birdbrains, in ANOTHER one of our Stewie-And-Brian-ripoff eps.
  • Riptoc Byrd: (Shrugs)
  • Riptoc Icky: "And we were gonna do that, but an otherwise unrelated fiasco caught our attention, and several chapters dedicated to humiliating filler villains later, here we are now in the process of finding said unrelated fiasco, and we decided to make sure we kept ya from reviving an old baddy of Spyro's while we're at it!
  • Eagle-Beak:... You guys, for the record, look ridiculous disguised like that. Then again, all the other Riptocs look ridiculous. They got horns on their heads.
  • Riptoc Bentley: I HAVE HORNS ON MY HEAD!
  • Riptoc Icky: Many of us do, and that INCLUDES dragons.
  • Eagle-Beak: I MEANT by horn standards. By Jove!... What are you all doing here anyway?
  • Riptoc Elora: Basically like what Icky said. We're here to deal with the recent global thief infestation.
  • Eagle-Beak: Ohho, right. The Rhynocs a few miles away from here were talking about a bunch of robed freaks stealing things all over the world.
  • Riptoc Hunter: And you're about to give us another problem.
  • Eagle-Beak:... If it's about Ripto, then there's nothing to worry about. The Shaman insisted that he's not as bad as his reputation has suggested, not saying it's entirely inaccurate, but it is purely a victim of exaggeration and over-hype.
  • Riptoc Bianca: "And you listened to him?"
  • Riptoc Sheila: "Yeah I think I get what one of your little friends meant by you REALLY missing this Quidilen very much alot."
  • Riptoc Byrd: "Professor, I can understand being a troubled father, adoption aside, but you're playing a risky game negotiating with the Riptocs."
  • Eagle-Beak: "Well, I'm sure the shaman at the least has abit more sense of honor then expected standards of these troubled reptilians."
  • Riptoc Icky: How is that? Give us good reason not to sack you right here and right now.
  • Eagle-Beak: "Look, I get these reptilians have a sour reputation, but that can't be helped when alot of them are bitter about how the Dragons in this world had handled this "Malefor". From my understanding, it sounded as if containing his rogueness could've gone better."
  • Riptoc Icky: "Well yeah, but that bitterness has allowed corruption to seep in like a bad roach infestation! So chances are, say the Riptocs did had a sense of honor, it may be tainted by all the hunger for revenge and crap!"
  • Eagle-Beak: "Well keep in mind that I once taught mind-based magic. I would've known if there was any corruption concerned."
  • Riptoc Hunter: "You did say your magic wasn't as good as it used to be. You likely had missed it."
  • Riptoc Iago: "Also, I think we established that there's always counters for every type of magic. Chances are, that Shaman could've masked the corruption."
  • Eagle-Beak: "Well even then, how can I just say no to an opportunity to have Quidilen back? I understood that this Ripto is very powerful."
  • Riptoc Icky: "Likely from VERY unsavory means!"
  • Eagle-Beak: "Well that's another thing! They offered to boost my magic back to like it was back in my Pre-Tartarus days."
  • Riptoc Elora: "Likely more so ya won't be useless to them as suppose to actual generosity. And again, he literally said that they would do anything to get Ripto and his monsters back! You sure ya don't want to be concerned about ulterior motives?"
  • Eagle-Beak: "...... Even then, I'm trapped in a severe conflict. Passing them up would mean not being with Quidilen again."
  • Riptoc Icky: "Then we can't promise this will end in a pacifist route, Professor."
  • Eagle-Beak: "..... If you insist. (Summons in Sing Jin Sue and Jerky)!"
  • Jerky: "HEY WAIT A MINUTE, I WAS ABOUT TO ENJOY MY MEAL HERE?!"
  • Eagle-Beak: "Sing Jin, those Riptocs are not what they appear! Restrain them!"
  • Sing Jin: "Yes Professor! Jerky, get me some rope!"
  • Jerky: "Can't this be AFTER I get a decent meal here?"
  • Sing Jin: AHEM! We have a job to do!
  • Jerky: UH, NO! YOU DON'T JUST ROPE SOMEONE IN OUT OF NOWHERE! Also, I CAN'T THINK NOR DO THINGS WHEN I HAVEN'T EVEN HAD BRUNCH YET, WOMAN?! I'M STARVING HERE, I HAVEN'T EATEN IN DAYS!
  • Sing Jin: THIS ISN'T ABOUT- (The Riptoced heroes kicked their butts and tied them up)..... It, was amazing, that your reign had lasted long as it did with an attitude like that.
  • Jerky: "To be fair, I had magic and soldiers to do all the work for me. And I lasted fine until that Icky and his Peacock buddy showed up!"
  • Riptoc Icky: "Hello to you too, Jerky."
  • Jerky: "Wait, have we met- (Pays closer attention to the patterns on Riptoc Icky's body).... YOU?! HOW DID YOU-"
  • Eagle-Beak/Sing Jin/The Riptoc'd Heroes: "Magic."
  • Jerky: "..... Fair enough."
  • Eagle-Beak:... Also, on the subject of your complaints, WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT DISTRACTING YOURSELVES?!?
  • Jerky: "Hey, I did say ya should've brought Xerxes or the Pirate Monkey!"
  • Eagle-Beak: "Something to consider for future ventures, I'm sure!"
  • Riptoc Icky: Sorry, EB, but we can't let you do this. Our plate is ALREADY full as it is.
  • Eagle-Beak:... I just want my daughter back, is that REALLY too much to ask?!
  • Riptoc Iago: It is if she hates your guts. I mean, you DID try using her to prepare for a war against Nightmare Moon.
  • Eagle-Beak: Well, when you get desperate to prevent a disaster like eternal night, I'd like to see YOU not go to any extreme. Now, leave, or I cannot guarantee your cover.
  • Riptoc Bianca: In that case... (She used her magic to immobilize him with roots)
  • Eagle-Beak: AHHH!!!
  • Riptoc Icky: Sorry, EB... Well, not really, but I ALMOST feel sorry for ya. Ripto CANNOT be set free. AND you can't be fraternizing with these treacherous and OBVIOUS LIARS!! Trust us, these guys HATE dragons, and that INCLUDES your adopted daughter. They won't care if you agree to leave the Dragon Realms. The moment you do your side of the bargain, they'll kill her, and free Ripto anyway. Surely you'd know that's something these despots would do.
  • Riptoc Zoe: Exactly. Riptocs don't care for dragons. They just see them as geoterrorists. Creatures that shape and tear apart the world however they want. All simply because Malefor decided to be a dinkus one day.
  • Eagle-Beak: YOU THINK I WOULDN'T HAVE A BACKUP PLAN FOR SUCH A SCENARIO?! THEY WOULD BE REJUVENATING MY MAGIC!
  • Riptoc Bianca: Eagle-Beak, even if they do, they'll have failsafes that ensures that, with all that power, you can NEVER hurt THEM. Like we said, there's ALWAYS a counterspell.
  • Riptoc Icky: So, get wise, you dumb bird-cat. Those guys are not as honorable as they should be. You're going to Prison 42.
  • Jerky: "Ya know the other guys will get us out of that place soon enough."
  • Riptoc Icky: "Yeah but it would be nice to have you guys absent for at least a few episodes more until a proper appearance is required for you guys."
  • Riptoc Byrd: Seriously, see a psychiatrist or something.
  • Eagle-Beak: UGH! NOT THIS TIME! (He broke himself free of the roots and attacked, fighting the heroes until they restrained him again)
  • Riptoc Icky: Enough with this, Eagle-Beak, you're coming with us, whether you like it or n- (They were all knocked out by magic blasts from Riptocs)
  • Shaman Reptild:... Word of advice, make your apprehensions MORE subtle. We could hear it from our location.
  • Eagle-Beak: Much appreciated.
  • Jerky: "Lucky us this so-called 5-Star hotel has paper-thin walls."

Later...

  • Icky: (He and his group were changed back to normal as they woke up tied up to stakes in a bonfire)... GYAAHH!!
  • Joule: Well, it appears we're about to be burned at the stake.
  • Iago: Wow. Primitive, but hey, who am I to judge a country?
  • Shaman Reptild: People, these heretics are friends of our King's defeaters, Spyro and Cynder. They are a menace to our society and way of life, and they support the existence of dragons. They must be executed.
  • Eagle-Beak: Well, my non-friends, looks like this mess could have been avoided if you had just stayed out of this.
  • Icky: Eagle-Beak, we're telling you, Ripto and his race are dangerous. If he's set free, all dragons will be destroyed, YOUR ADOPTED DAUGHTER INCLUDED!
  • Eagle-Beak: I've heard enough lies.
  • Icky: DUDE, WHY WOULD WE LIE IN A CRITICAL SITUATION LIKE THIS?!?
  • Byrd: They are telling the truth, Eagle-Beak. You MUST not-
  • Eagle-Beak: I SAID I'VE HEARD ENOUGH!
  • Shaman Reptild: Now then, if we're done... Let us begin the execution.
  • Bartholomew: Shouldn't you do ritual and make us watch?
  • Shaman Reptild: And give you more time to escape? No. You must be executed first.
  • Agent IX: LET US OUT, YOU HORNED FREAKS!!!
  • Icky: IX, they're not gonna let us out, save your energy.
  • Agent IX: Then I'll break us out- (He saw his equipment was gone)... WHA, WHERE'S MY-
  • Iago: Idiot, did you really expect them to leave your equipment? Some bodyguard you turned out to be.
  • Shaman Reptild: (They lit the fire) BURN, HERETICS!
  • Icky: WE COULD REALLY USE A DEUS EX MACHINA RIGHT NOW!
  • A Riptoc Guard runs in!
  • Riptoc Guard: "SHAMAN?! SHAMAN?! A VERY LARGE RHYNOC BRIGADE IS CHARGING FORTH?!"
  • Shaman Reptild: "UGGGGH?! ALWAYS WHILE WE'RE IN THE MIDDLE OF RITUALS?! WHAT IS IT THIS TIME?!"
  • Riptoc Guard: ".... They heard about the latest attempt to free Ripto, and are after the professor for their own plans to suppress the dragons?!"
  • Shaman Reptild: ".... (Has the fires undone)....."
  • Icky: "..... Or, have these guys flipflop cause an enemy is gonna make trouble, that works too."
  • Shaman Reptild: "Before we continue, heretics, CONFESS?! DID YOU HAD ANYTHING TO DO WITH THE RHYNOCS GETTING WISE TO THIS?!"
  • Hunter: "And what would we have to gain getting him dragged into your racial conflict when the Rhynocs are no better?"
  • Icky: "Yeah! We want the old griffin kept out of your mess period!"
  • Shaman Reptild: ".... (To the crowd) RIPTOCS?! I worry this incursion may not be because of the easy picks in these outsiders?! WE HAVE A TRAITOR IN OUR MISTS, THAT RATTED US OUT?!! (The Riptocs were shocked)..... WHO RATTED US OUT TO PREVENT RIPTO'S RETURN?!"
  • Silence.....
  • Shaman Reptild: "..... WELL I'M NOT GONNA LET THE EXECUTION CONTINUE UNTIL I FIGURE OUT WHO'S THE RAT SO THEY CAN BE ADDED FOR THE BURNING AS WELL?!"
  • Eagle-Beak: "You do realize that'll risk those Rhynocs enough time to come to the city, right?"
  • Shaman Reptild: "..... Okay, to speed up the process, I'm gonna pick three random suspects: (Points to a Guard Captain) You, (Points to a Riptoc General) You, and especially (Points to a Pterasaur Riptoc that clearly looks like a serious defector of her people) YOU, the city's resident dragon sympathizer! (Eagle-Beak facepalms). Now, I want all three-"
  • Eagle-Beak: "Actually, good Shaman, would it NOT be easier to just ASSUME off the bat the dragon sympathizer is at fault here?"
  • Shaman Reptild: "..... Actually, fair point. GUARDS?!"
  • Riptoc Pterasaur: "Uh oh! (Flys up into the air as she brought up an iScroll) Team, I'm gonna need backup!" (Thieves came in and threw garbage at them while mocking them typical Spyro thief style)"
  • Shaman Reptild: YOU LITTLE BASTARDS!!
  • Icky: That right there, is what we're REALLY after, Shaman. In fact, given that Pterosaur guy-
  • Riptoc Pterasaur: "I'M A WOMAN?!"
  • Icky: WELL SORRY, YOU LACKED BOOBS?!
  • Riptoc Pterasaur: "WELL EXCUSE ME IF IT'S RARE FOR SENTIENT REPTILES TO HAVE MAMMAL PARTS, YA PERVE?!"
  • Icky: "SO I GUESS I CAN CALL THE ELDER SCROLLS SERIES NOT REPRESENTATIVE OF ALL REPTILES EXCEPT THOSE IN THEIR PARTICULAR EVOLUTION BRANCH, HUH?!"
  • Riptoc Pterasaur: "I DID SAY IT WAS RARE?! EXCEPTIONS CAN EXIST, BUT WE RIPTOCS AIN'T AMONG THEM?!"
  • Icky: AHEM! Anyway, SHE, called THEM for backup... I think I have a pretty good idea, THEY'RE pulling strings behind us all.
  • Shaman Reptild: But, but, but-but-but, what would THEY have to gain from freeing our king?! And wait a minute, (To the Pterasaur) I thought you were a defector that DIDN'T wanted that!
  • Riptoc Pterasaur: "I was ensured it would've been prevented anyway and that it would lead to you losing your position, Shaman! My mother was right! We're better off not letting hate rule us! This day will make sure of this! (Flew off)"
  • Shaman Reptild: "..... WHY WOULD MY SON'S LITTLE FRIENDS DO THIS?!"
  • Eagle-Beak: Possibly as a distraction. When heroes are on your tail and you're afraid they'll pop in at the worst time, what can you do, but bring in a threat that'll keep them busy long enough for them to initiate their plan?
  • Shaman Reptild:... WHY THOSE CONNIVING COLORED MUMMIES!!! I WILL HAVE TO TALK TO MY SON ABOUT HIS ILL CHOICE OF FRIENDS THEN AFTERWORDS FOR THIS DEBAUCHERY!! NOBODY CHEATS WITH OUR KING!!! EVERYONE?!? RELEASE THE HERETICS!!
  • Riptoc #1: Really?
  • Shaman Reptild: NOW! (They did that)... I don't want to do this, NOR have anything in relation to it... But I have to ask you, to find that perpetrator for using our king for those thieves' own agenda!
  • Sheila:... Struth. That was pretty lucky... AGAIN.
  • Icky:... Uhhh... Thanks, I guess?
  • Shaman Reptild: "Try not to read too much into it! It's because I want that she-traitor captured! Otherwise, my opinion on you is no better then it was before this!"
  • Bianca: "Fair enough, but we can't promise this will be done for free!"
  • Shaman Reptild: "Be warned that anything involving NOT helping our king is TABOO?!"
  • Eagle-Beak: "Good job making it clear to them, Shaman, but be warned that the two Lodgers bare the infamous stubbornness-and-fickleness-known in the group. Especially if that defector can be able to win them over. I mean, they're already against the idea of having your king back, so-"
  • Icky: "How's about this, dino-breath..... If we find that girl and get you two to have a reasonable compromise about all this "King Ripto" crap, you have to be honest to Eagle-Beak that you might have different plans for Qui should she end up here!"
  • Shaman Reptild: ".... Hmmm. Make sure you bring the girl ALIVE, and, I'll consider it."
  • Eagle-Beak: ".... Ahem! Again, they are notoriously fickle! They'll end up sympathizing with her and turn on you!"
  • Shaman Reptild: "..... Then you Professor, and your two companions, are to keep with them and make sure they don't stray!"
  • Eagle-Beak: "(Makes a surprised face as a quack sound is heard)..... Shaman, please be aware that they have the intention of PUTTING ME INTO A SPACE PRISON?!"
  • Shaman Reptild: "To be fair, your reputation proceeds you. You did after all try to use a dragon against a horse god, among other things."
  • Eagle-Beak: ".... (Facepalms) Uggggh, is being used by these robed heathens that bad, dear Shaman?"
  • Shaman Reptild: "YES?! Thieves have damaged our pride! Now go with the outsiders and contain that defector!"
  • Jerky: "(Came in eating food) Hey gang, what did I miss, I was just enjoying the buffet!"
  • Sing Jin: ".... You, are not, going to like, what I am about to say."
  • Jerky: "What, is it bad?"

Later...

  • Jerky: OH, IT'S DEFINITELY BAD!!
  • Icky: Yeah, so like it or not, eviler me, we're going to catch that she-pterosaur for her treachery and get back to this thieving plague, while your asses are hauled to Prison 42.
  • Jerky: DAMMIT! The time there is so, unstructured! And the guards don't beat you! They just tell you how, DISAPPOINTED they are in you. (Shivers)
  • Iago: I thought the worst about it was that it was in a dimension that induces emotional trauma.
  • Jerky: Not since it was bought from S.H.I.E.L.D, stupid. Who builds a prison in a dimension like that?!
  • Sing Jin: "Clearly the kind of people that don't want to repeatedly dealing with the kind of people normally placed there."
  • Eagle-Beak: "Well clearly they couldn't stop Qui and even so much as Hank from being able to escape just fine."
  • Icky: "Hey give the place some credit, they've improved for a long while now."
  • Eagle-Beak: Yes, I mean it was built during some superhero civil war by two geniuses, ONE OF WHICH HAS A DRINKING PROBLEM, and it stuck around until... Quite randomly now that I think about it, Tricorn decided to buy it. Yet, for years now, and it's the end of the decade, it's STILL got more holes in it than Swiss cheese.
  • Iago: Hey, it's a cartoon.
  • Byrd: (Sighs) They say that a lot.
  • Eagle-Beak:... I haven't got the heart nor patience to tell him. But still, this girl's actions are going to instigate a war between these two races, and we can't have that ruining a world.
  • Byrd: Then the first thing to do is to negotiate with the Rhynocs that they were set up as much as the Riptocs were.
  • Shaman Reptild: NONSENSE! The Rhynocs are notorious jerks.
  • Icky: Well, then you'd actually fit right in.
  • Iago: OHHHO, SHOTS FIRED!!
  • Shaman Reptild: Look, just do what you must. We and the Rhynocs have already had it bad with our wars. King Ripto may not be freed today, but someday. Now go!
  • Icky: Don't tell us what to do. (They left)
  • Shaman Reptild:... Hmmph. I'll tell THEM who'd fit right in with the Rhynocs.

Rhynocia

  • Rhynoc Leader: YES, MY RHYNOCS! WE SHALL GIVE THOSE RIPTOCS A PIECE OF OUR MINDS! IT'S WAAAAAAR!! WAAAAAAAARRR!!!!
  • ???: HAAAAAAAAALT!!!
  • Rhynoc Leader: (Everyone stopped) WHO SAID HALT?!? I GIVE THE ORDERS AROUND HERE!!
  • Icky: (He and the others appeared) S'up, rhino boys. Icky and Iago of the Shell Lodge Squad here.
  • Rhynoc Leader:... You mean as in the same hero team Spyro and Cynder, the defeaters of King Ripto III, are in?
  • Icky: As if to imply Spyro and Cynder are common names?
  • Rhynoc Leader:... Wiseass. (Sighs)... Not to be rude, but this is not your business. This is between us and the Riptocs.
  • Byrd: Actually it's ALL of our business because our journey was lead to yours. You've all been used by a defect of the Riptocs. This whole thing is just a distraction for the Thieves Guild.
  • Rhynoc Leader:... You mean those immature colored robe mummies who steal things?
  • Sheila: Yes, mate, the same.
  • Bentley: They distract you and us with this mess to proceed with their plans.
  • Bartholomew: AAAAASSSHHHOOOOOOLLES!!
  • Icky: Stop yelling that! There could be kids present!
  • Agent IX: Hey, with the Internet growing too big, kids are gonna hear it anyway.
  • Rhynoc Leader:... If that's true, then prove it. Cause otherwise, I'm pretty sure the Riptocs are dead serious about getting their crazy king back! I mean, we're not crazy for dragons too, but, that Ripto guy can be WAAAAY worse than what Malefor took YEARS to be. If he's back, the Riptocs can do some very MESSED up s***, and our people are at risk of being the first ones to go!
  • Bianca: "I guess that's why the defect did what she did."
  • Sheila: "And the involvement with the Thieves."
  • Rhynoc Leader: "Assuming those thieves ARE involved. Cause at worse those guys are annoyances protected by a freed she-genie. I don't see them causing wars and stuff, well, maybe outside of cause they stolen something, but that's more of an aftermath thing, it's not counting as purposeful."
  • Icky: Well, they're planning something huge. They just robbed Moneybags Mansion clean, and they stole plans for an indestructible lamp that can be used to de-free genies... But we scrapped that idea because it could be too dangerous in the wrong hands.
  • Rhynoc Leader: Well of COURSE such a device would be too dangerous to possess. If you were to trap a free genie inside a lamp like that, you'd be unstoppable, just like if Ripto was allowed to steal massive amounts of dragon mana. Last time he was free, he planned to steal all the mana in the world. Every power crystal, every magical essence, everything, so that he could become a god. He would've succeeded if those two dragon friends of yours hadn't imprisoned him in another time crystal. Ripto has killed dozens of dragons because he could depower them in an instant by absorbing their mana.
  • Byrd: Well, good. But... Why not just kill him? I mean, someone as dangerous as him doesn't deserve to live.
  • Rhynoc Leader: Believe me, I asked myself the same question multiple times. But the UUniverses aren't in its medieval ages anymore, and morality is more infectious these days.
  • Icky: Well, Ripto sounds like the kind of fiend who would try and become a god even after death, by possessing someone or some s***. Maybe killing him would just make the hornhead stronger. The guy is way too powerful to try anything, so yeah, trapping him in a time crystal would make sense.
  • Rhynoc Leader: Whatever, I still say he should've died. But anyway, where is this, defect you speak of?
  • Icky: "That we're working on, we're just taking the time to get ya to cool your rhino heels first."
  • Rhynoc Leader: "Ugh, really, not even telling me a guesswork?"
  • Iago: "Well A, we don't want to complicate things by having you guys tearing up the land for one chick, second, it's not like she took the time to say where she was going, just that freeing Ripto's a bad idea."
  • Rhynoc Leader: "Ehh, credit where it's due, at least she's not a STUPID Riptoc, and that's saying something."
  • Rhynoc General: "Sire, these maggots are wasting time, they're either liars or procrastinators if there is an actual defect! Let's just smack these losers away and-"
  • Rhynoc Leader: SILENCE! I detect no hint of lying in their voices. And they are not the lying types. They look too serious to lie... Except the seagull and parrot.
  • Icky: First, I'm an Ichthyornis, second, not funny!
  • Rhynoc Leader: Regardless, we must regroup and return to Rhynocia until the Riptoc's traitor is dealt with appropriately. MEN, MOVE OUT! (They did)
  • Icky:... It just gets easier and easier.
  • Bentley: LET'S CRUSH A TRAITOR!!!
  • Icky: "Upupup! Let's keep in mind that the girl was primarily trying to STOP Ripto's return. Getting involved with the Thieves may had been a last-ditch effort."
  • Bentley: "Not even, little crush?"
  • Icky: "No, not even a little crush. Again, she was trying to stop Ripto's return. And your seriously suggesting to crash her ass in the name of a dragon-hating jerkface?"
  • Bentley: "..... Me see point."
  • Byrd: "Well be that as it may, she may still be hesitant to co-operate with us regardless. Gee Nee could've promised something to her to ensure a far more permanent solution to keeping Ripto contained in a way even every known Legend Dragon can't reverse."
  • Sheila: "..... Ya don't suppose those scamps may had tempted her with the idea of trapping Ripto and his buddies inside the indestructible lamps, do ya?"
  • Icky: "I ain't crazy for the idea neither, but what else did you guys think they were gonna do with the plans to begin with given they have a perfectly willing free Genie just as much capable giving unfathomable power without being held back by a wish limit?"
  • Joule: "Ripto's not a genie though."
  • Iago: "True..... But they may have big plans to MAKE him one, SO THEN that raptorial yuts is more vulnerable to the lamp! That way, no Ripto means the Riptocs will finally have to move on!"
  • Bianca: "..... She must've lead a real tortured life to go this far."
  • Icky: "Well given that Shaman said she was a netourious Ripto Critic, I'm gonna say it's a big fat YES! I'm betting the Riptocs had treated her like garbage for this to even being a thing!"
  • Bentley: "..... Good to smash now?"
  • Icky: "Still not good to smash! Again, she's doing this to keep the idea of Ripto returning as dead as a doornail."
  • Bentley: "..... Fair point."
  • Hunter: "But at the same time, won't trapping Ripto in an indestructible lamp open up new risks, ones worse then what the Riptocs are trying to do now?"
  • Icky: Yeah, I mean, Jafar was trapped in a lamp, and then Abis Mal came and allowed his return. Who's to say that won't happen to Ripto?
  • Iago: Simple. We KNOW that a genie dies when their lamp is destroyed, so just do that to Ripto. Boom.
  • Icky:... I think we already established that killing him isn't the answer-
  • Iago: Oh please, we did it a lot to the Villain League.
  • Icky: That's because they always get resurrected afterward.
  • Iago: Well, Ripto SHOULD be like them by proxy.
  • Icky: I mean, when he can't be resurrected, we- Wait, uh, I mean-
  • Iago: PLAN A OR PLAN B, ICKY, WE HAVEN'T GOT ALL DAY!
  • Icky: ALRIGHT, PLAN B! FINE! GOD!... But can't we just kill him WITHOUT an elaborate plan involving turning him into a genie?
  • Bartholomew: Can't magic rabbit turn Ripto into giant magic tree? No death, no genie involvement, nothing?
  • Bianca: Because then, the Riptocs would find a way to reverse the spell.
  • Iago: I still say we kill him. Seems like the most permanent method to me.
  • Icky: We ALSO established his soul could possess others.
  • Iago: BUT SOULS CAN BE DESTROYED, RIGHT?! HAVE YOU SEEN THE GHOST RIDER VS. LOBO DEATH BATTLE?! (Everyone except Bianca ended up arguing for the solution)
  • Bianca: "..... ALL OF YOU PLEASE?! (Everyone stops)..... How's about, instead, we do something to the time crystal that makes it impossible for even Genies to be able to effect?"
  • Icky/Iago: "..... Ohhhhhhh, Genie-Proofing the crystal. That can work.... JINX, YA OWE ME A ROOT BEER?!"
  • Joule: "Well, it is possible, but there are challenges: Hey, how does one Genie-Proof anything, much less a crystal based on time, and two, I'm pretty sure the Riptocs may have some protests to it."
  • Byrd: "And then there's the griffin professor and the two lackies. Speaking of which, where are they again?"
  • Icky: "We did an off-camera split-up agreement and had those three look for the Riptoc Defect."

The trio's location.

  • Jerky: "(Waving a fish around like a yuts) Here Dactyl dactyl dactyl?! Come get your nice fishy!"
  • Eagle-Beak and Sing Jin stare at Jerky.....
  • Sing Jin: "..... This guy, managed to maintain many years of rule up until Lord Shen and Icky arrived."
  • Eagle-Beak: "He did admitted he had magic and soldiers do the majority of his work."
  • Jerky: "Here Dactyl dactyl dactyl! It's a tasty freshly caught fish! A Maceral even! HMMMM MMM?! They're the Popeyes Chicken of Fishes!"
  • Eagle-Beak: "FOR BLOODY SAKES, JERKY, I DOUBT THIS RIPTOC IS STUPID ENOUGH TO BE WON OVER BY A FISH JUST BECAUSE SHE RESEMBLES A PTERASAUR?!"
  • Jerky: "Ya know that for sure? Cause this ALWAYS gets them!"
  • Eagle-Beak: It only gets them on YOUR world.
  • Jerky: Whatever! I KNOW what I'm doing!
  • ???: HEEEEERE BIRDY BIRDY BIRDY! COME GET SOME FRESH MACKEREL!! (Another fish dangled from a higher ledge)
  • Jerky:... OH YEAH, BABY! GIMME THAT FISH!! (He ate it and got caught by the pterosaur)
  • Pterosaur: HAH! Birds are so stupid.
  • Sing Jin: SERIOUSLY?!?
  • Pterosaur: Hey, you two. Tell Shaman Reptild that he's insane.
  • Eagle-Beak: I'm pretty sure there wouldn't be a point in that. Who are you, anyway?
  • Pterosaur: Petea. I see how dangerous this whole s*** is, and I want to do something about it.
  • Eagle-Beak: "Well how is it that you, a Riptoc, hates Ripto, your people's king? I was under the impression that opinions on him were pretty uniformly positive."
  • Petea: "And contribute to making my people look as bad as the apes for that Malefor crud? NO, THANK YOU?! I am trying prevent my people from being ruined by a cycle of hate born because one purple dragon decided to go the bad boy route!"
  • Jerky: "To be fair, nearly destroying the planet's a HELL of a bad boy right!"
  • Petea: ".... Hear me out..... You know how Gaul's apes couldn't drop their hatred on dragons for, whatever unclear reasons, that hey hypocritically USED dragons to go after them?"
  • Sing Jin: "Wait, you said "Gaul's Apes".... Are you trying to imply that the race as a whole isn't behind that League Monkey?"
  • Petea: ".... THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT I'M TRYING TO PREVENT WITH RIPTOCS?! LETTING BAD EXAMPLES BE VIEWED AS AN ACCURATE PICTURE FOR AN ENTIRE RACE?!"
  • Eagle-Beak: "Ahem! My apologies for Sing's question, she was being curious. Continue."
  • Petea: ".... Sorry, I'm sensitive about that comparison. Okay, for real, you know about how Gau's apes hated dragons so much that they were hypocritical enough to USE dragons like Cynder and Malefor to try to get their way, whatever it was?"
  • Eagle-Beak: "Well there are rumors that Gaul's Apes had be cursed into becoming skeletons, but the league had reversed that."
  • Petea: ".... But only for Gaul's Apes. NOT SO MUCH AS THE REST OF THEM BARING EXTREMELY LUCKY EXCEPTIONS?!"
  • Silence....
  • Sing Jin: "..... Well, to be fair, I would imagine that's because Malefor is a bit of a demon anyway. Not really known for gratefulness. Also, Gaul's Apes were not originally seriously loyal to Malefor till the league restored them, so, kinda not like he just did that for fun."
  • Petea: "I can get doing that for Gaul's band of idiots..... But what about apes that wanted NOTHING to do with them?! They still suffered because of the actions of morons?! They are still cursed because obviously, the league doesn't think that good Apes exists?!"
  • Eagle-Beak: "..... Dare I, ask how you know this?"
  • Petea: "..... I met a mercenary who was able to realize that his brother Gaul was a hopeless nutcase. He showed me what happened. (Gestures the trio to follow her to a certain spot, of what looks like an Ape Colony placed in the badlands).... You see them? (Ape Skeletons were mindlessly roaming around)....... Those apes, are not even involved with Gaul, yet, they suffered because a maniac got selfish."
  • Jerky: "..... Oy. Spooky Scary Skeletons. Go figure."
  • Eagle-Beak: "..... A pity indeed, but, how does this relate to Ripto and the Riptocs? I'm pretty sure the Riptocs are earnestly loyal to Ripto."
  • Petea: ".... But is Ripto returning the favor? How does that goony shaman know Ripto hasn't started to lose his mind?"
  • Sing Jin: "Well how can anyone if he's trapped in a time crystal-"
  • Petea: "EXACTLY WHAT I MEAN?!"
  • Silence....
  • Eagle-Beak: "..... Ahem.... Well, I suppose I can say I am seeing what the prehistoric bird, the parrot and his new friends were blabbing on about. But why drive yourself to get with those Thieves?"
  • Petea: "Well, not exactly the entire group. The ones you saw throwing trash were once my pet raccoons, before they got turned into what they are. They, managed to remember me and agreed to help me out."
  • Jerky: "Ya mean the guys that threw trash at us were just freaking defects?!"
  • Petea: "Well, not officially, but rather defects that kinda convinced the Guild to mess around with the Shaman, who's son is otherwise a respected client."
  • Eagle-Beak: ".... I'll admit, a clever strategy, but you do realize of course that given the indestructible lamp issue, those Guild Thieves might end up getting the insane idea of using that such thing on Ripto?"
  • Petea: ".... (Sighs), That was, something my raccoons couldn't avoid in order to make this happen. Cause otherwise, Master Thief is very loyal to clients for as long as they return the favor as well as the shaman's son does."
  • Sing Jin: "A Thief with honor, huh? That is SUCH a rare concept."
  • Jerky: "So, how long until Icky and friends just show their faces out of random nowhere and-"
  • Icky: (He and others were behind the trio) We've been here the whole time.
  • Jerky: AAHH, ICHTHYORNIS JESUS OR WHATEVER NOMINATIONAL DEITY MY HOME PLANET ACTUALLY WORSHIPS BECAUSE I'VE BEEN GONE FOR SO LONG FROM THE PLANET!!! Can't you wear a BELL or something?!?
  • Icky: A BELL?!?
  • Jerky:... Okay, I see your point.
  • Petea:... So, you heard why I'm doing this?
  • Icky: Yeah. You don't want Riptocs to end up like the apes. As for the apes, we also met Gaul's brother and he told us about what happened to apes as a race.
  • Petea: So you understand?
  • Iago: Well, not completely. You STILL nearly started a bloodbath between Riptocs and Rhynocs.
  • Petea: It's purely meant to scare Riptocs out of being loyal to the Shaman, I promise you I did not intend THAT level of harm.
  • Icky: Didn't you?
  • Petea: I DIDN'T!!!
  • Icky: DIDN'T YOU?!?
  • Petea: (Sighs) Look, are you agreeing with me or not? Ripto CANNOT be set free. I respect him as a king he COULD'VE been, but if he's set free, then there's a chance he'll end up like Gaul, but much worse given his ability to sap dragons clean of their mana.
  • Icky: ".... Okay, I'll throw ya a bone here and consider Ripto's freedom abit worse than a racial bloodbath. There's just the matter of getting the Shaman out of his Ripto-Fanboyism. Cause I would imagine that if we showed him what happened to the apes, he'll argue that's still Malefor being a mofo and not count it as something that could happen to the Riptocs cause they're not being loyal to a dragon."
  • Petea: "True, but he was gonna make the griffin create a purple dragon, and given what happened to the SCARLET DRAGON of all things, who's to say that poor hatchling won't unintentionally end up being a New-Age Malefor?!"
  • Eagle-Beak: "CAN WE PLEASE NOT USE QUIDILEN AS AN EXAMPLE OF BAD IMPLICATIONS OF MY CAPABILITIES?!"
  • Icky: "Is she wrong though? Qui ended up leading a villain team of another dimension and was a persisting headache up until early season 3 because you had Nightmare Moon-Phobia! Imagine what a purple dragon from you is gonna be like, espeically if the guy is mainly gonna be made to free a dragon-hater?!"
  • Eagle-Beak: "..... (Dejected) Okay, fair enough argument."
  • Icky: So, that settles it. All we have to do is convince the Shaman that Ripto being freed right now is dangerous, and not just because of the reasons of being evil and hating dragons. I mean, when you saw him in that time crystal, he wasn't just like the one in the original franchise. He was an iron-fisted cold-blooded battle mage. Armor and the cape is more for a knight. And yeah, he knows to keep that cape from being used against him Incredibles style, because people like Batman would know how to avoid that.
  • Iago: That guy LOOKS like the kind of guy who'd end up in over his head like Gaul.
  • Petea: Then how do we prove THIS to the Shaman?
  • Icky: Easy. (He tosses a rock at the two ape skeletons as they got angry)...
  • Bentley:... Me smash?
  • Icky: No, we need to lead them to the Shaman! NOW RUN!! (They did that)
  • The Ape Skeletons screech as they charge as this music plays.
Spooky Scary Skeletons Remix Extended Mix

Spooky Scary Skeletons Remix Extended Mix

Deadpool: "HA! How predictable this got involved"

  • Icky: OKAY, MAYBE THIS WAS A BAD IDEA!!
  • Bentley: DO I SMASH?!?
  • Icky: NO!!
  • Petea: Um, I could always just lift them to the Shaman.
  • Icky: No, no, that'll be what they expect from you. They might bite your talons off. (They kept running away with the ape skeletons chasing them in a comical montage as the music played until they landed right neat Shaman Reptild)
  • Shaman Reptild: WHAT THE DEVIL?!? (The ape skeletons fell and shattered to bones upon landing, before they reformed themselves and made crazy ape sounds) AAHHH!! WHAT THE DOUBLE DEVIL?!?
  • Petea: (Landing) THIS is why I betrayed you! These apes served the Dark Master himself, and Gaul and his forces, as well as all apes as a race, suffered THIS curse. I... I fear that if we are not careful, we and Ripto shall suffer the same fate.
  • Shaman Reptild:... You expect me to believe that?
  • Byrd: It's true. She told us herself.
  • Shaman Reptild: AND YOU BELIEVED HER?!?
  • Petea: Would I not even BE here if I wasn't, much less bring these boneheads here? Think about it!!
  • Shaman Reptild: ".... Well, I-"
  • Eagle-Beak: "Before you bring up the "Not serving dragons" argument, be reminded that you were asking me to make a purple dragon! And much as I hate badmouthing myself, let's bring up what happened when I made Qui as what she is!"
  • Icky: Well yeah, I'm pretty sure making that kid's first experience to be a guy with a raging hate-boner for dragons would screw up the poor kid epicly, maybe enough to be a new-age Malefor! Oh, and speaking of Ripto, your own hypocrisy could even be called into question and put you in bad graces with that yuts. Since he hates dragons more than ANY of you, imagine how he'll feel when he finds out you used a DRAGON to free him. Regardless if it was to save him, he won't be grateful and label you a defiler. You'll be severely punished.
  • Eagle-Beak: Exactly. Plus, everyone else who agreed with you will suffer the same fate.
  • Petea: NOW you see why I betrayed you? If that's not the worst that happens upon Ripto's freedom, THEN BEING CURSED WILL BE!! I betrayed you because I wanted to protect us Riptocs.
  • Shaman Reptild:... I... Look, I-
  • Sheila: Mate, save it, you're out of excuses. This was a bad idea in more ways than one.
  • Shaman Reptild:... Why... Why are you even helping us? After what our king did to your friends Spyro and Cynder?
  • Icky: Well, aside from those Thieves getting involved, Ripto sounds like too big a threat to just ignore. No offense and I appreciate your loyalty to the guy, but he shouldn't be freed. In fact, how about you pick the most loyal to him AND the most cautious to lead in his place?
  • Petea: That would be me, actually.
  • Shaman Reptild: LIKE HELL! I wouldn't call getting involved with thieves and attracting cursed bone creatures into the land all that loyal! It's ME who's the most loyal!
  • Petea: But you're ALSO not the most cautious. You tried to free him with what you all hated the most. If that's cautious to you, then you need a dictionary. As for me, I've been the MOST cautious since we started this whole plan.
  • Shaman Reptild: Why did you even withhold this plan from us?
  • Petea: Duh, because why would you listen?
  • Shaman Reptild:... Fair point, stupid question... (Sighs)... I suppose I'm not worthy to be Ripto's savior after all. Nor am I getting the feeling you might be so dedicated to getting him out.
  • Petea: "Well, I admit I'm more loyal to what he could've been, not what he turned into. He would've ended up restarting the cycle that gor dragons hated to begin with, only the Riptocs would've ended up, them. (Points back to the freaking out Skeleton Apes)...."
  • Shaman Reptild: ".... Alchourse..... So uh, now that your point has been made, CAN YOU KINDLY PUT THESE GRAVEYARD FREAKS BACK WHERE YOU FOUND THEM?! THEY'RE MAKING A MESS OF THINGS?!"
  • Icky: "Okay Bentley, NOW you can smash."
  • Bentley: FINALLY!! BENTLEY SMAAAASSH!!!
  • Bartholomew: DON'T HAVE FUN WITHOUT ME!! (They smashed up the apes gruesomely, or at least as gruesome as flying bones can be)
  • Icky:... Good thing they have no blood anymore.
  • Shaman Reptild: Definitely. Though I don't consider bones any less of a mess.
  • Iago: "Ahhh don't worry, we'll dump them back in that old Ape Colony afterwords."

Later...

  • Icky:... Alright, we got that cleaned up. About time too. Now we can get back to those damn Thieves.
  • Petea: Actually, I couldn't find them.
  • Everyone: WHAT?!
  • Petea: They must've bolted as soon as they saw their 'distraction' was a tiny one thanks to you.
  • Icky: F***! Those thieves are starting to PISS ME OFF!!
  • Byrd: Get in line, buddy.
  • Joule: Well, we DID come here because we suspected their hideout was here.
  • Sheila: Well, what made ya think it was here anyway?
  • Zoe: Yes, I'm with the kangaroo on this one. They must've relocated thanks to their genie or something.
  • Elora: I don't think we'll be able to get an INCH closer to them with that genie always being one step ahead of us. At this point, anything we do is a waste of time.
  • Hunter: Calm yourself, Elora. We can't give up.
  • Elora: Easy for you to say, you were there to help Spyro and Cynder stop Malefor upon his return.
  • Hunter: But you're a warrior princess, aren't you?
  • Elora: Yes, but this genie is making us all look like jokes. How can we beat her if she's always watching us and using those powers of hers to hop around the world?! And it's not like Bianca and Zoe here are any match for her all-powerful magic.
  • Zoe: We'll find a way.
  • Elora: WE'VE BEEN FINDING A WAY THIS WHOLE ADVENTURE!!! AND WE'RE NOWHERE CLOSE TO THE THIEVES' GUILD!!!
  • Agent IX: THAT DOESN'T MEAN WE GIVE UP!
  • Bianca: (Sighs) Here's a thought: How about we DISGUISE ourselves as Thieves and sneak into their hideout?
  • Agent IX: Though that COULD work, they're SURE to have protocols and codes to ensure we're not one of them. All they have to do is ask us where the Thieves Guild is, and we'll be caught the MOMENT we don't turn into animals.
  • Bartholomew: Why would they do that?
  • Agent IX: I just said to ensure we're one of them. And it's not like they'd stay as their original selves forever. It's just a security protocol. They could do anything to expose us as phonies.
  • Bianca: Well we'll HAVE to become unsentient versions of ourselves for a brief moment in order to play along.
  • Icky: You mean turn us unsentient for a brief moment?!
  • Bianca: I am specialized in nature magic, and that DOES include controlling sentience in animals. Watch. (She uses the spell of Byrd, turning him into a normal emperor penguin who sounded like one before changing him back)
  • Byrd: GYAAH!! DON'T DO THAT!! DO YOU KNOW WHAT PENGUINS DO WHEN THEY AREN'T SENTIENT?!?
  • Icky:... I don't like this either, but, if it means we get into the Thieves Guild, then we have to take it.
  • Agent IX: Well, even if you CAN do that, those thieves are DAMN smart. The moment they see some thieves turn into a normal Ichthyornis, parrot, rabbit, kangaroo, penguin... Snow monkeys, firefly, and goat, I guess? Uh, mole, cheetah, and monkey, they'll get suspicious, and Gee Nee won't change us back. We'll just be stuck as unsentient animals forever.
  • Icky: Look, it's the best we've got right now.
  • Agent IX: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaAAAAAAAND, Gee Nee MIGHT be watching us and prepare for out plan off the bat. It's pretty clear she knows our every move.
  • Byrd: Well if she's all-powerful, why didn't she just do this easily and take us all out with lightning or something in a millisecond? She's holding back. But why?
  • Icky: "Well either she's semi-honorable and wants to beat us fairly, or just as much, she's toying with us."
  • Agent IX: "I would pick both. If a bit more leaning on that she wants to dick with us!"
  • Iago: This is why villains are such jokes. They have a need to hold back because they have a need to toy with their enemies that'll obviously just kick their asses in the end. Especially all-powerful ones like Jafar. That's why this is likely going to work without a scratch.
  • Bianca:... Then I suppose we can get started on my plan.
  • Agent IX: WAAAAAIIIIIT!
  • Bianca: UGH, NOW WHAT?!?
  • Agent IX: MAYBE she's acting that way, because she's going to lure us into a trap. Maybe she IS watching us because, once again, she's toying with us, and... Well, she just lures you into that trap so she can disintegrate you all in an instant.
  • Icky: ".... Okay, a fair possibility, but then that puts us in a serious pickle cause what you just said means we're just generally FUCKED!"
  • Agent IX: It really does.
  • Icky: But we can't just do nothing. These guys are a serious threat.
  • Agent IX:... Are they? Because the more I think about it, all they are is just basic criminals that formed their own syndicate.
  • Bianca: Aren't you with Interpol? You know these guys are dangerous, and since the Lodgers changed, they have been getting more active. They have even robbed the world's best banking conglomerate in an instant.
  • Agent IX: But does that mean they're doing something serious?
  • Icky: I need to remind you that they stole plans for an indestructible lamp. If what you're on about with probable scenarios is accurate, then who's to say they'll ACTUALLY destroy those plans? What if they just, use it for their own nefarious purposes, like convert it into a capturing device for powerful threats?
  • Agent IX: What would they have to gain from such an attention-grabbing plot?
  • Icky: (Sighs) Are we really on this probability argument? Does it even matter WHAT they plan to do? Whatever it is, I don't think it's worth leaving them alone to find out. We HAVE to do something about it.
  • Agent IX: Alright, HEROES, how do we do that? We already established that sneaking in disguised as Thieves will only be asking for going into a trap.
  • Iago: At LEAST it'll get us there. And lets at least HUMOR Gee Nee here. Maybe she WON'T disintegrate us in the spot. Think about it. If she wanted to disintegrate us, she would've done it already, and doing it when we go straight up to them? It's not exactly something she'd be proud of in the long-run. We KNOW villains. They're too cocky and overconfident for their own good.
  • Agent IX: First time for everything.
  • Iago: She LITERALLY turned us into sheep. She wouldn't disintegrate us. Also, I'm surprised nobody has brought this up, but GENIES CAN'T KILL ANYBODY!... But you'd be surprised what you can live through.
  • Agent IX: THAT'S why we didn't bring it up. Genies like your former master find loopholes around the limits to a genie's power.
  • Icky:... Limits to a genie's POWER, THAT'S IT!!
  • Joule: What's it?
  • Icky: Genies have limits to their power.... Or at least, it depends on which world they come from. Genies in Timmy Turner's world have no limits. But in most worlds they do.
  • Joule: And what would these rules be, exactly?
  • Icky:... Well, I'm guessing these rules aren't limited to just the three Genie pointed out.... Iago? You have that copy of Da Rules that Timmy gave us?
  • Iago: No, because we literally went for groceries before this happened.
  • Joule: I do, actually. (He brought it out)
  • Icky:... You've been preparing for an anti-Genie eventuality for some time, haven't you?
  • Joule: Of course. I WAS co-working for that indestructible lamp project. And yes, you two might be onto something. Your Genie friend may not have provided that many rules, but that doesn't mean they were the only ones. He did say once that there's some wishes that even he can't make come true. That implies there's more than 3 rules.
  • Byrd:... Then... Is there any rule in that book that can help protect us against Gee Nee?
  • Joule: "You mean in an event of a freed genie turning rogue? Well technically the indestructible lamp was already gonna be the answer: Putting the Genie back into a lamp. The indestructableness and added inability to be wished back out were just insurance to make sure Gee Nee remains contained."
  • Icky: "That much we already know, but any specifics to freed genies?"
  • Joule: "Well, according to this, being freed from the lamp does come with restrictions so a freed genie isn't a COMPLETE danger. Like their powers are not as cosmically strong as it was in a lamp, that their no-kill rules still apply even when not bound to a lamp, among others like re-animating dead things or forced romance and that they are ceptable to being recaptured to any vacant genie lamp."
  • Agent IX: "..... Ohhhh I'm getting it now. Okay, fair enough, she can't permanently cream us from the face of the earth. But I can argue that she can still cream us badly enough so that the Thieves can finish us off from there!"
  • Icky: ".... But is there anything about Genies falling in love with mortals? Cause I'm pretty sure that M.T. is otherwise a normal dude."
  • Joule: "Well, there is one rule against that, but it's kinda considered outmoded cause of the 1959 Amendment to have it retired cause of a genie named "Jeannie", as approved by the Genie Council."
  • Icky: ".... Good to know "I dream of Jeannie" is why Master Thief was even able to HAVE a genie girlfriend."
  • Joule: "But, I do believe that it's possible to get the old rule reamended to give it a fair balance so to ensure that Genies only date those of non-criminal or dangerious lifestyles."
  • Agent IX: "Not a bad idea, but, new-problem though: HOW DOES ONE CONTACT A COUNCIL OF GENIES?!"
  • Icky: "..... Give me 5 minutes. (Pulls out his iPhone and starts using it).... Yo, Genie? Ya cool about doing a VERY personal favor? Cause we have this thing about a freed genie being romantically involved with a criminal and we need to re-amend an outmoded law to be abit more balanced to prevent crooks from being able to get genie girlfriends."
  • (Genie):... Oh, wow, uh... That's a lot... Look, uh, Ickster, I'd love to help, but... Me and the Jungle Crew have some business in Fu Dog's world. It's gonna be a day or a week tops.
  • Icky: Whaaat?!? SERIOUSLY?! YOU GUYS ARE IN THE MIDDLE OF SOMETHING?! Is it something we're gonna have to worry about later?!
  • (Genie): But I CAN transport you guys there. Bibbidy, Bobbidy...

Genie Realm

  • (Genie): (They were teleported directly there) BOO!
  • Bentley: DAAAHHH!!!
  • (Genie):... You got a dummy with you? And an unfamiliar one?
  • Icky: Long story, and it involves exactly what I just said.
  • (Genie): Well just be careful, genies are pretty nasty dudes and dudettes. Comes with being omnipotent... Adjacent. Watch especially for the cranky and weird crone leader of all Genies, Jean.
  • Iago: ARE ALL GENIES' NAMES A PUN ON GENIES?!?
  • (Genie): NO! THAT'S STEREOTYPING! (Rodney Dangerfield impression) No respect at all. Just go and do what you have to do and we'll do what WE have to do.
  • (Pumbaa): GENIE, C'MON, FU DOG'S ALREADY GETTING PARANOID!!!
  • (Genie): Gotta go, cheerio, don't croak, my bros. (He hung up)
  • Sheila:... Your friend sounds funny.
  • Icky: Kinda the idea. But hey, we're where we need to be... Though what he said about a mission in Fu Dog's world is... As Shen would've said, Concerning. Considering a threat FROM there is one of our main enemies... Despite him not appearing much anymore because of his silly war against the Toa. I have a feeling we're gonna have to worry about that soon enough.
  • Iago: We'll worry about that later. Right now, we need to talk to some genies.
  • Icky: "Well let's go find us a Genie Council, and then-"
  • Suddenly the group got surrounded by a Genie Media and Genie Law enforcement!
  • Icky: ".... Kinda figured we were gonna be turned into a genie Media Circus. (Quick Circus Act passed through them)..... I DIDN'T MEANT LITTERALLY, GUYS?!"
  • A Purple Male Genie in a suit appeared!
  • Purple Genie: "Okay folks, calm down, these outsiders are clearly here for Genie Council business, I'm taking this from here!"
  • Genie #1: Aw man! I wanted to have some fun with these guys. They look like they're from a circus. (Laughs like a clown)
  • Purple Genie: (Gets bigger and more devilish) NOOOOOOOOOOOW!!!! (That scared all the genies away)... Ahem. Welcome. My name is Jac, and I'll be your escort to the Genie Council.
  • Sheila:... Well, never thought I'd end up in Cloud Cuckoo Land, mate, and yet here I am.
  • Jac: This is the land of genies. Or at least, the DIMENSION of genies. When our magic became leaky and leaked across dimensions, we had to get jobs outside of them as servants who use this leaking magic to, well... Grant three wishes.... Or at least many wishes until the three-wish limit came... THEN came the loophole of wishing for more wishes.
  • Icky: Wow, your lives must suck as omnipotent beings.
  • Jac: ADJACENT.
  • Icky: YEAH, THAT GOES WITHOUT SAYING!!
  • Jac: Look, Jean is a little too occupied right now.
  • Icky: Even if he heard it's about a free genie getting together with a master criminal?
  • Jac: WHAT?!? (Everyone who heard that ended up wreaking chaos with their magic in a panic)
  • Genie #2: AAAHAHHHHHH, DISGRACING MAAAAGIIIHIHIHIIIIC!!!
  • Genie #3: WE'LL NEVER MAKE WISHES AGAAAAAIIIN!!!
  • Jac: Oh, now look what you did. Last time this happened it took a decade to fix it.
  • Zoe: A DECADE?!
  • Jac: A literal, decade. When you're omnipotent, time is practically nonexistent.
  • Icky: I'm pretty sure it's when you're IMMORTAL, time is practically nonexistent. That just comes WITH being omnipotent.
  • Jac: Right right, look, I'm sure he'll be in a listening mood when he hears that. Him and the Genie Council. Espeically if this is likely because of the 1959 amendment to the outmoded rule about dating mortals thanks to the Jeannie thing.
  • Icky: "Well we're willing to offer a compromise amendment about making it that criminals and villains are not apart of the being allowed to date mortals thing."
  • Jac: ".... That, could actually work! And a fair and reasonable compromise to anything absolutist! Great suggestion! We don't need any genies dating criminals. Otherwise that could be an abuse of our powers, for evil."
  • Joule: Why do you think I had the indestructible project cancelled?
  • Jac: Don't remind me. Let's go.

Chapter 5: Another Showdown with Master Thief

Genie Council Room.

  • Jean: (He was a white genie with a Chinese beard and eyebrows) I DON'T CARE WHAT'S GOTTA BE DONE!! WE CAN'T HAVE A GODDAMN GENIE IN LOVE WITH A CRIMINAL USE HER POWERS FOR EVIL!! HER LOVER'S NOT EVEN THAT GOOD LOOKING!! I'VE SEEN BLOBFISH PRETTIER THAN HIM!!!
  • Green Genie: "Well, love can be blind, sir."
  • Jean: "BESIDES THE POINT?! FIGURES THAT AMENDMENT BACK WHEN THAT JEANNIE GIRL FROM AN OLD SITCOM PEOPLE BARELY EVEN REMEMBER WAS A THING ANYMORE WOULD BACKFIRE ON US?! WE NEED TO DO SOMETHING?!"
  • Aqua Genie: "Well I would like to remind everyone that anything absolutist would be too inconvenient to all the GOOD Genies out there!"
  • Indigo Genie: "Romances between genies and mortals are rare anyway, so it's not like it's that much harm!"
  • Cyan Genie: And let's not get started even ONCE on Shantae.
  • Cerulean Genie: Oh, let's NOT! I mean... (Whistles like a pervert) WHAT A WOMAN! Have you even SEEN that half-genie babe?! Leaving all that skin open for an attack. So desperate for men's attention that she forgets the dangers she runs from on each game she has. If you ask me, the one-wish anyone would EVER want from her is 'I wanna do naughty things with you'.
  • Scottish Colors Genie: "But we should still be considerate all the same, though! We need to make a compromise with this!"
  • Jean: EVERYONE SHUT UP!! I don't give a sparkling' s*** how genies fall in love. All I care about is THIS love. A thief is using OUR power for evil, and Gee Nee is making a mockery of genies, INCLUDING the free ones, everywhere!
  • Gray Genie: C'mon, genies have been abused before. Comes with having near-limitless power.
  • Indigo Genie: Yeah, I mean-
  • Jean: SHUT, UP! I'M TRYING TO FIGURE THIS OUT!! CAN WE AT LEAST HAVE, ONE, F*****G ONE, PERSON DO SOMETHING ABOUT THIS?!?
  • Cyan Genie: Well, no mortal can do anything about it. It'd be like a single ant trying to kill a human. It's just improbable.
  • Jean: But at least someone who knows a thing or two about this kinda crap.
  • Aqua-Green Genie: Ugh, I'll just have karma fairies save us the trouble. IT'S NOT LIKE HEROES ARE JUST GONNA COME RIGHT AT OUR DOOR! (Icky, Iago, and their group appeared)... You're WELCOME!!!
  • Jean:... Thanks, Karmie. Ahem... WHO THE HECK ARE YOU?!?
  • Orange Genie: "They're two of the lougers and a collection of Dragon Realms' Natives."
  • Jean: ".... Dare I ask your business then?"
  • Icky: Well, from what we heard you yelling, the same as yours. This business involving Gee Nee and Master Thief.
  • Jean:... Well, thanks, Karmie.
  • Karmie: Don't mention it.
  • Sheila: So, you wouldn't mind if we gave you some help in this, mate? We might have a plan to beat her for yous. It's come to our attention that genies ain't exactly as all-powerful as it suggests.
  • Jean:... Indeed not. We can't kill, force love, or bring people back to life... But there's other things we can't do.
  • Bartholomew: Um, if you guys are so powerful, why don't you just send Gee Nee here for punishment?
  • Cyan Genie: You think we haven't tried that?
  • Jean: That's another one of our limits. Just as we can't force love, we cannot do anything that interferes with it. Messing with true love, is beyond our power.
  • Iago: BULLS***!! THIS TRUE LOVE IS A BAD ONE!!
  • Jean: Love's amoral, I'm afraid. Even villains feel love too. Why else do ya hear so much about villains getting the HOTS for the Main Hero's girl?
  • Iago: ".... Good point."
  • Jean: We can't undo true love, no matter what that true love does. So, just sending her here for trial would be violating that.
  • Icky: That fiendish bitch! She's thought of everything!
  • Gray Genie: It's SO annoying that our limits to power have to be used against us! Kinda demeans the purpose of being all-powerful wish granters. Hell, some genies have been dumped for them because they're just beggars being choosers.
  • Iago:... That explains why Genie didn't take kindly to Aladdin's snarky remarks about his power when they first met.
  • Gray Genie: Exactly! It makes some of us SICK! Gee Nee gets to do whatever she wants with her power because she's in love. In fact, THAT'S why the law against genies falling in love with mortals even existed before that "I dream of Jeannie" Crud made us put it down like Old Yeller! I, kid you not! THIS VERY SITUATION IS WHY IT EVEN EXISTED!!! Until it was all f****d up, by THAT JEANNIE C**T!! (Everyone was shocked by his sexist words)
  • Scottish Colored Genie: THERE'S NO CALL FOR THAT KIND OF LANGUAGE, LAD!!
  • Gray Genie: OH I DON'T CARE IF IT'S SEXIST!! SHE DOOMED OUR NAME TO GEE NEE AND HER UGLY-ASS BOYFRIEND!!!
  • Icky: "Dude, that amendment was literally made in like, the final stretch of the 50s, you guys didn't had the mindset to check what's gonna happen in the future!"
  • Gray Genie: "..... (SIghs)..... I'm sorry everyone, he's right, that's, that's a fair point. Totally wished we checked what happened in the future first before we carried it out."
  • Orange Genie: "I would really envy the us of an alternate timeline that did had that hindsight."
  • Icky: "So, does that mean that the amendment is, out of the question?"
  • Jean: "Alas, yes, unless something happens that makes BOTH of those two more legally liable to Genie laws! Cause well, genie laws work most for Genies!"
  • Icky and Iago had surprised faces.....
  • Icky: "..... Give MT the Jafar Treatment?"
  • Iago: "The Jafar Treatment."
  • Jean: "Uh, excuse me?"
  • Icky: "Ahem! Crazy idea, and I know some of you may think it's crazy, BUUUUUUT..... What if we can make it that MT IS more liable to genie law, by giving him the Jafar Treatment?"
  • Jean: "This being-"
  • Orange Genie: "They're basically suggesting having Master Thief turned into a Genie so he is more vulnerable to Genie Law."
  • Jean: "..... THAT'S THE MOST RISKIEST PROPISETION EVER?! Yet, just enough to work!"
  • Gray Genie: "But I'm PRETTY damn sure Master Thief is not stupid enough to turn himself into a genie, given how well known the "Jafar Treatment" is! WE ALL SEEN THE ORIGINAL MOVIE?! AND since Gee Nee is a freed genie, so there's NO WAY she'll willingly turn him into a Genie!"
  • Icky: Yeah, but have you ever considered that she would do anything for him?
  • Jean: "Well that's kinda the point of contention with her dating a criminal!"
  • Icky:.... Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.... But, she knows that turning him into a genie brings risks. I mean, turning into a genie means you get the package deal of the lamp and eternal servitude.
  • Cerulean Genie: And we genies have no power over the rules of the genie. Even the free ones can't free a genie from their lamp. She KNOWS that turning him into a genie can cause that risk.
  • Icky: Oh, there's a way we can ensure that. Remember the 2019 Aladdin remake?
  • Karmie: It was literally a year ago, how could we forget that asinine excuse of a remake?
  • Iago:... OHHHH YEAH! In that version, Jafar didn't just WISH to be a genie. He wished to be the most powerful being in the universe or something like that. The vagueness played into the heroes favor' and they turned him into a genie.
  • Jean:... That's BRILLIANT!
  • Gray Genie: "Though again, Master Thief still isn't as stupid as a shotty revision of a great villain. I'm pretty sure he knows how to avoid being vague."
  • Indigo Genie: That and Gee Nee wouldn't turn him into a genie even IF he was vague about it.
  • Iago: See, that's the thing. You can't be that specific when you say 'the most powerful being that's not a gen-'.... Oh, wait a minute.
  • Joule:... What if you could MAKE an omnipotent being INTO a genie?
  • Orange Genie: Huh?
  • Joule: I mean, any omnipotent creature can be a genie. They just need a lamp and the shackles they offer.
  • Orange Genie:... That could work.
  • Jean: I don't think so. That kind of thing has been forsaken for eons. It's become a crime at this point.
  • Icky: Not anymore it's not. With how many rogue omnipotent beings there likely are out there, would it even matter anymore?
  • Jean:... Hmm... Fair point. So... I suppose we have a solid plan then?
  • Joule: Exactly. We just have Gee Nee turn Master Thief omnipotent, and then we can slap Master Thief into a lamp and MAKE him a genie. Then without her true love protecting her, you'll be free to punish Gee Nee.
  • Jean: Rock solid!
  • Gray Genie: ".... Okay, I suppose we can give it the old college try."
  • Icky: Then it's settled. When we're done with Gee Nee, she'll be in your custody quicker than you can say 'wish granted'. Be reminded it's a metaphor though.
  • Indigo Genie: "Oh thanks for the reminder, I was almost tempted to actually say it."
  • Bartholomew: PFFT!
  • Indigo Genie: Hey, we're genies, what did you expect?
  • Bartholomew: But you free genies, right?
  • Indigo Genie: Well, we're more akin to jinn. Genie is more of a title for jinn who actually have a use for their omnipotence.
  • Icky: Guys, let's just move. Guys, you know where Gee Nee and the Thieves Guild is, right?
  • Jean: Of course.
  • Iago: Then we wish to be at a safe enough distance so we can execute our plan.
  • All Genies: Your wish is our command! (They transport them off)

Several Miles off from the Thieves Guild HQ

  • The group found themselves just at some miles off from the actual area.
  • Icky: "..... I, don't think these guys gave us the exact area."
  • Iago: "I'm thinking because a scene was inconsistent to the original writing. Also, I'm guessing they didn't wanted us to get bum-rushed by those thieves by putting is in the exact spot."
  • Icky: "Still, they could've at least just placed us at the front-entrance."
  • Iago: OHH, tell me about it! I can never get used to that hocus pocus, even from other genies.
  • Icky: "Well judging at we're at least close to the place now, I'm guessing this means that the plot's trying to move us forward cause there's an anticipated episode on the horizon."
  • Iago: "Ohhh boy, that means the plot is gonna rush abit."
  • Byrd: "(Dejected sigh), I do not believe I'll ever be able to understand Louger logic."
  • Icky: "And kinda for the best it stays that way."
  • (Deadpool): Yeah it is. You cannot BEGIN to imagine the existential crisis cartoon characters suffer if they find out they're fictional.
  • Byrd: WHA, WHO SAID THAT?!?
  • Icky: Never mind that. Let's go.
  • Byrd:... Ugh. I think I have GOT to lay off the caffeine now, I'm starting to hear things. (Deadpool dryly snickered)

Inside the Guild.

  • A Younger Trodon Riptoc was seen before Master Thief and Gee Nee.
  • Younger Trodon Riptoc: "YOU IDIOTS RUINED MY FATHER?!"
  • Master Thief: "Look, if it helps kid, the moment I found out those friends of the defector were trying to scam me, I had Gee turned them back into Raccoons..... Though admittingly, I guess that was what they wanted."
  • Younger Trodon Riptoc: "WELL THANKS TO YOU, THAT DEFECT IS GONNA LEAD RIPTOCS AWAY FROM RIPTO, AND NOW MY FATHER LOST HIS FIGHTING SPIRIT BECAUSE OF, IMPLICATIONS?! I WANT YOU THIEVES TO FIX THIS?!"
  • Master Thief: "Kid, I kinda have my own problems at the moment, can't yours wait for a moment?"
  • Younger Trodon Riptoc: "ANY MOMENT WAITED IS A MOMENT THAT THE DEFECT IS ALLOWED TO PUSH US AWAY FROM RIPTO?! If you guys aren't gonna help, FINE?! I'll go to your original location and awake the desert serpent to do my bidding instead?!"
  • Master Thief: "Don't ya think we messed with forces greater than us enough for the day, kiddo?"
  • Younger Trodon Riptoc: "HOW IRONIC FROM THE GUY IN LOVED WITH A GENIE?! I-"
  • Master Thief: "Okay, now you're just being personal now. I'll have to permit General Silverstealth and Deadly Silence to deal with you."
  • Suddenly, DS appeared and used a stealth maneuver to instantly knocked out the Younger Riptoc.
  • Silverstrealth: "(Shows up) Personally sir, this kid was in way over his head anyway. He'll be held in the guild's dungeon. (The Thieves dragged-away the knockedout Riptoc)."
  • Master Thief: "Buuuut, he does give a new idea what to do with the Indestructible Lamp Plans now. We'll have it contain that giant desert god snake instead. It's a close second to a powerful dinosaur wizard king, right?"
  • DS: "Well I'm pretty sure the college of Freezar wouldn't like being disturbed like that."
  • Master Thief: "Well that's what he gets for being a sulker like he is for not being the nominated deity this planet worships anymore."
  • Gee Nee: "Well trying to capture the Great Sand-Bringer Serpent isn't gonna be a walk in the park. I mean, he's more of an eldritch god snake, not a genie, and the lamp's meant for Genies."
  • Master Thief: "Ahhhh, but we can turn him into a GENIE Eltrich God Snake, he would be more effective then!"
  • Gee Nee: "..... I'm still uneasy about not getting rid of the plans in full, but, I trust you enough about putting it to, ironic use."
  • Master Thief: "Exactly! Us being able to control a god snake with that thing will SCARE people away from ever wanting to trap you back into something like that again! And what better serpent than the sand-one? That guy can cause sand-storms and bury everything into more sand then acceptable for a Sandbox! With the Great Sand Bringer, nobody's gonna think it's a good idea to fuck with the Thieve's Guild again after that, much less messing with my lovelife! And add that to having you and Marmauder, we'll be SUCH a badass crime group, even the Mafia Alliance would be jealous of us!"
  • DS: "Well that would only happen if we make sure those birdbrains and their new friends aren't a problem anymore."
  • Master Thief: I assure you they won't as soon as that giant serpent is mine.
  • (Deadpool): "Someone better hold that phone, CAUSE I FREAKING CALLED IT?!"
  • (MSM): Shaddap.

Back to the group

  • Icky: (They finally arrived to the exact Thieves Guild area)... So, this must be the place.
  • Sheila: Must be.
  • Byrd: Looks like there's nothing here.
  • Iago: I got this. I should know how this goes. (He flew down)... OPEN, SESAME! (A magical water barricade opened)
  • Zoe:... Well, how on earth did you guess THAT?!?
  • Iago: Eh, gut instinct, and a very good hunch. C'mon! (They entered)
  • However, before they got further, Marmauder intersected them with a loud stomp and roared?!
  • Icky: "..... Oh, right..... This big galoot!"
  • Bentley: "Me VERY good on rematch anyway?! Me no get beaten this time!"
  • Bartholomew: Me don't know, brother.
  • Bentley: ME KNOW! HE GONNA- (Marmauder punched him through rocks and into the sand) PHMMMMmm!! (He broke out and was punched in the same way three times)
  • Bartholomew:... This a little funny.
  • Byrd: "If you don't mind Bentley, I believe fighting this armored behemoth may have to be a group effort!"
  • Bentley: NO! BENTLEY NEED THIS!! (He kept getting beaten in the same fashion)
  • Sheila:... He's quite persistent.
  • Bartholomew: You have no idea. (Bentley lunged in only to get punched off again)
  • Icky: ".... Well, at least we can say Bentley's brave beyond reason."
  • Byrd: No offense, but I'm leaning more towards too dumb to quit.
  • Bentley: I GOT YOU NOOOOWW!! (He lunged in again as Marmauder caught his arms and twisted them as he roared in pain)
  • Bartholomew: BROTHEEERRR!!! (He punched him in the groin, but it didn't hurt)... (Marmauder just kicked him away)
  • Byrd:... Wow. He couldn't even hurt him in the balls. What kind of sensual discipline has this man gone through?!
  • Icky: "Weeeeeell, it's not that the guy went vastly unrealistic levels of pain-resistance as more like, it's basically a giant skeleton under that armor. Especially since he's clearly based on established Legend of Spyro Bosses."
  • Byrd: Oh, right. I forgot that.
  • Iago: You, FORGOT that?
  • Byrd: WHATEVER, CAN WE GET TO TAKING HIM DOWN TOGETHER OR WHAT?!? (Marmauder heard them and faced them)... Okay, maybe I shouldn't have said that.
  • Icky: YA THINK?!? (Marmauder charged at them with great power)
  • Byrd: "INCOMING?!" (He charged into them all with a bowling strike sound)
  • Bianca: Okay, that tears it! (She immobilized Marmauder with magic roots)
  • Sheila: YAAAAA!! (She leapt up and kicked so hard, she shattered Marmauder into armor and bones) YEAH, BONZA, TAKE THAT, YA BLOODY WANKER!!
  • Zoe: Uh, Sheila, I don't think that's gonna stop him. (All the bones and armor magically reassembled themselves)
  • Sheila:... Oh, nuts. (She was kicked much harder and into a tree) OOF!!... Rippah!
  • Byrd: Okay, time to get out the BIG GUNS! (He fired his DB-X launchers at Marmauder as he just grabbed the missiles one-by-one and threw them back at him, knocking him right into Sheila) OOF!
  • Sheila: WHOA, MATE, YOU HAVEN'T EVEN TAKEN ME OUT TO DINNER YET!
  • Byrd: OH SHUT UP! AND I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND ALREADY?!
  • Icky: "Good grief, Spyro makes it look EASY fighting these kinds of guys?!"
  • Iago: THAT'S BECAUSE HE'S GOT CRAZY POWERS!! We got LESS crazy powers! THIS GUY IS OP AS ALL HELL!!
  • Zoe: (Sighs) I can't believe I'm doing this. (She kissed all the heroes, including the girls to her sheer disgust, using the magic in each one to empower them, and allowing them to bash him to near-defeat)
  • Marauder's armor started to feel apart, exposing the skeletal pieces, but in being mindless, the creature soldier'd on.
  • Bentley: "This guy's either brave or stupid."
  • Elora: "He's basically a giant walking skeleton in armor, I think it's more like he's too mindless to know fear."
  • Bentley: "Mindless and stupid technically same thing!"
  • Elora: JUST KEEP HITTING IT UNTIL IT STAYS DOWN!!
  • Iago: THAT'S SOMETHING I'M SURE WE'D SAY, SO LET'S DO IT! (They kept beating up Marmauder in comically insane ways until their magic enhancement wore off)... Oh, piss, it wore off.
  • Zoe: Well, I'm not kissing you lame-brains again. Cause FYI, I am NOT a fan of the "Kissing Powerup" thing!
  • Byrd: "There's no need anyway, I believe Marmauder is at a point of weakness. Just a matter of hitting it's Achilles heel and taking the undead abomination down for good! (Marmauder moaned comically until they just smashed his bones to pieces)"
  • Bentley:... Good riddance, ugly.
  • Bartholomew: Asshole!
  • Byrd:... Well at least you didn't yell it this time.
  • Bartholomew: "Eh, that getting old anyway."
  • Byrd: Move out! (They ran inside)
  • Icky: Hahaha! About DAMN time! These f****rs are going down! D-O-W-N, DOWN!
  • Elora: Wait, I'm confused, were we supposed to go in swinging?
  • Icky: Well, no, we-... AWWWW, F*** ME- (A trapdoor opened underneath them)... Well, now we're the ones going down.
  • Zoe: But some of us can fly- (Random boxing glove springs knocked the flying heroes down the hole as the flightless members fell, all of them screaming comically)
  • Silverstealth and some green robes came in....
  • Silverstealth: ".... (Sighs), A bittersweet success in losing Marmauder, but we got those suckers now?! (Mournful) Goldloot would've been proud."
  • Green Robe 1: "Sir, Goldloot didn't died, he just got turned back into an animal cause of the failsafe-"
  • Silverstealth: "LET ME GRIEVE?!"

Later...

  • Icky: (They woke up and saw they had their stuff stolen and were all tied up as thieves of all kinds were staring angrily at them) DYAAH!!!
  • Elora: Well, fantastic, you idiots forgot your own plan! Thanks for getting us captured!
  • Master Thief:... Well, congratulations... You found us. Welcome, to the Guild of Thieves. (Suddenly, the thieves sung this) What the-?!
Welcome to the forty thieves - lyrics

Welcome to the forty thieves - lyrics

  • Master Thief: OY!! WHAT IS THIS, A MUSICAL THEATRE!?
  • Gee Nee: I thought it was good.
  • Icky: "And hey, we found an excuse for the song here. Man we took awhile to put an incredibly obvious and yet befitting song here."
  • Master Thief: ".... Ignoring that. Well, this time, abusing our own failsafe's not gonna work, because-"
  • Icky: "Dude, we're not Patrick levels of stupid, we ARE in the Thieves Guild HQ, we know the failsafe doesn't work in the EXACT area we're in."
  • Master Thief: "..... D'awwwww, ya took all the fun in rubbing that in your faces."
  • Gee Nee: "Ya can still mock them for barging into our lair like morons."
  • Master Thief: "Fair enough. WOW, YOU GUYS WERE SERIOUSLY CRAZY ENOUGH TO BARGE INTO THIS PLACE LIKE YA OWN IT?!"
  • Iago: "Actually, judging from these old statues (Gnorc Statues were seen), It don't look to me that you're the owner."
  • Master Thief: ".... Okay wiseguy, it's a borrowed Gnorc Outpost that seen better days back when Gnasty Gnorc was out and about.... At least until Spyro and Cyndy came and kicked his ass and went down with his Goutto in the middle of the ocean, from like, way early after the Malefor thing went kaput."
  • Icky: "(Quietly) I am SERIOUSLY expecting a Spyro exclusive story series from this."
  • Master Thief: Well, too bad, I'll explain it, because it actually helped me get off the ground. Turns out, Gnasty Gnorc wanted Gee Nee and use her power, absorbing it into his magic club to enhance his power. He had already turned power gems into monsters to serve him, and he could already find ways to starve dragons, but Spyro and Cynder were there to stop him. And honestly, I should thank them for keeping him from Gee Nee, because if they didn't, I wouldn't have met her.
  • Gee Nee: (Giggles) Oh, you.
  • Icky: Ugh, can you please take it outside?!
  • Gee Nee: (With giant monstrous face) SHUT UP!!
  • Icky: (Does the Mama Luigi episode 'YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP!!')
  • Iago:... Did you just-
  • Gee Nee: Hahah, I love being all-powerful.
  • Master Thief: And I love you.
  • Gee Nee: I know. (The two of them kiss)
  • Icky:... You know... If you love him so much... Why don't you make him all-powerful?
  • Gee Nee: What?
  • Icky: I mean, you have more power than him. You gave it to him because you love him. Imagine if you gave him unlimited power too. He'd give just as much back. I mean, also, there's the omnipresent issue of you being immortal and MT isn't, so, I would imagine death would pretty much be the ultimate blue-baller of your little romance here.
  • Gee Nee:... What kind of fool do you take me for? I know your game. You wouldn't suggest something that stupid unless there was a greater plan. You were smart enough to not use the thieves' failsafe here, so, you shouldn't really insult MY intelligence like you have so many others.
  • Master Thief: Exactly! And you think I haven't seen the 2019 Aladdin remake? Though I kinda wish I haven't, GOD that movie was a slap to the face of the animated original! You think you can dupe her into vaguely turning ME into a Genie, just so you can trap me into a lamp, and destroy Gee Nee's protection from the Genie Council?
  • Bentley:... Noo?
  • Master Thief:... (Laughs) Guys, if we WERE that stupid, we wouldn't even be great thieves! Much less even HAVE a Thieves Guild! Strategic thinking is our specialty here. In fact, you've just given me an idea anyway. Gee Nee? How about you just make me all-powerful?
  • Gee Nee:... Yeah. Not like there's any way you'll be a genie. I'd NEVER turn you into one and risk you getting shackled by the rules of the genie. But turning you, into a GOD?! THAT, is guaranteed not to go wrong.
  • Hunter: Guys, what the heck?!
  • Icky: Ahem!
  • Hunter:... Oh, right. I mean, forget I said anything.
  • Gee Nee:... You guys are so weird. But anyway, I suppose it's time to get this over with. (She cracked her knuckles and uses her magic on the Master Thief)
  • Master Thief: (Dubbed as Jafar) YEEESSSS! YEEEEESSSSSS! THE POWER! THE ABSOLUTE POWER! (Breaks through the hideout) THE DRAGON REALMS ARE MINE TO COMMAND, TO CONTROL!
  • Gee Nee: Couldn't have said it better, my love. Let's blow this joint! (They teleported away)
  • Silverstealth's voice: "WHAT THE HECK JUST HAPPENED?! WHY DID OUR BOSS SUDDENLY TURNED INTO THAT?!"
  • Hunter:... I hope this plan is worth sacrificing so many people's lives.
  • Icky: No one's gonna DIE! Zoe? Can you teleport entire populations?
  • Zoe: Of course I can. I AM the princess of the Fairy Realms.
  • Icky: Then you know what to do.
  • Zoe: Alright... (Sighs)... To repeat Hunter's statement, this BETTER be worth it, and NOBODY better die during all this.
  • Icky: And I repeat, NOBODY'S GONNA DIE!!
  • Zoe: "Not on my watch!"
  • Iago: OFF TO... Wherever he is!
  • Zoe: We can just teleport TO his location. OUR spells aren't bound by specifics.
  • Icky: Thank God, then, just do it.
  • Zoe: Don't tell me what to do! (They teleported after them)

Dragon Realms New York

  • Axle: Ugh. This is ridiculous.
  • Janet: Hey, Axle, we can't be cops anymore. 2020 IS the future year, so the cops gotta get with the times. The people have spoken.
  • Axle: Look, I get the atypical racism thing got abit much now, but, do we REALLY have to start dressing like State Troopers mixed with park rangers?
  • Bullington: Look, we have to engage in controversy avoidance as per Tri-Corn's and the public's orders, else, well, it would just look, insensitive.
  • Juan: Si. It's time to change. So we are no longer the UUPD.
  • Bullington: Indeed. We're now, UUniversal Sheriffs.
  • Axle:... That's stupid. We're law enforcement in the expansive recesses of the UUniverses, why not be something more serious-sounding and less... Themed for a certain area? Like, space marines?
  • Bullington: "It wasn't my idea. It's was the first thing Tri-Corn made."
  • Axle: "Oyyyyyy."
  • Ducker: "Fair's fair, I always knew this racism issue is gonna blow up spectacularly one of these days."
  • Axle: I still don't know, maybe Tri-Corn could at least be better at naming the new UUPD? Or just, I don't know, grow some thicker skin? I've always been a cop.
  • Bullington: Look, I won't have the controversy ruin us here.
  • Axle: COPS HAVE DONE CONTROVERSIAL THINGS BEFORE!!
  • Bullington: Let's, CHANGE, the subject.
  • Axle: Fine, whatever. It's just, 'Sheriffs' sound like something that belongs more in a Western setting or something.
  • Janet: Just, roll with it, okay?
  • Axle: (Sighs until suddenly, Master Thief appeared)... OH, NOT THAT GUY AGAIN!!
  • Juan: WHY DOES HE LOOK LIKE HE'S ALL-POWERFUL NOW?!? AND PLEASE TELL ME IT'S NOT BECAUSE HE IS!!
  • Master Thief: Because I am.
  • Juan: AAAWWWWW DIOS MIO!!!
  • Felix: WHERE'S THE LODGERS WHEN YOU NEED THEM?!?
  • Master Thief: No Lodgers this time. By the time they come back, everything will be destroyed and ransacked. EV, RY, THING!!
  • Gee Nee: WHOOO, you got big, hon!
  • Master Thief:...... You ruined it. You ruined the moment.
  • Gee Nee: Well then let's try again. (She cartoonishly rewinded the moment)
  • Master Thief: EV, RY, THING!!
  • Gee Nee: WHAT HE SAID!!
  • Master Thief: THANKS!!
  • Axle: "Wait, did you seriously just timelooped because of what I assume something embarrassing hap- (Gets zapped by Gee Nee) D'OWWWWWWWWWWWWW?! (Zapping stops)..... (Coughs), So that's what it feels like. I might have more soul-searching to do than expected."
  • Master Thief: Alright, everyone! (He summoned his many thieves)... GET EVERYTHING ELSE VALUABLE! (They did that as the heroes teleported to him) As for me, I'll make sure everyone here can't-
  • Zoe: (She used her wand to teleport everyone away)...
  • Master Thief: WHAT THE-?! WHERE'D EVERYBODY GO?!?
  • Iago: Somewhere YOU can't hurt them.
  • Master Thief:... And where is THAT?!

Genie Dimension

  • Jean: (They were all teleported there)... I suppose that's our signal.
  • Karmie: Yes indeed. We have the experimental lamp in place?
  • Cyan Genie: Indeed.
  • Axle: Okay, WTF is going on here?!
  • Cerulean Genie: No time for questions. Those Lodgers and their allies are going to save your home from that guy who zapped you.
  • Axle: Well, they better hurry their kiesters up. I've already been embarrassed with the premature renaming of the UUPD. Pretend that cops never existed, why don't you?
  • Mulligan: Oh, quit your whining!

Dragon Realms New York

  • Master Thief: "Okay, what's going on here, I know you birdbrains and friends are up to something?!"
  • Icky: "Maybe we are, maybe we AREN'T!"
  • Master Thief: ".... Oh is that how we're playing, wiseguys? SILVERSTEALTH, DEADLY SILENCE, (Silverstealth and Deadly Silence appeared) KICK THEIR ASSES?!"
  • DS: "Just let me do all the heavy lifting, General. (Readies wrist blades)!"
  • Byrd: ".... The Gecko that has caused our problems, I presume?"
  • DS: "Who else but? Just a professional espionager doing his job!"
  • Byrd: ".... Everyone, leave this lizard to me. He commited the act of putting my girlfriend in an undignified position."
  • Sheila: "Hey, if it's personal, then the little scaley's all yours."
  • Byrd and DS confronted eachother.
  • Silverstealth: "THEN YOU ARE MINE, KANGAROO?! I'LL MAKE YOU PAY FOR WHAT YOU DID TO MY MENTOR GOLDLOOT?! GREEN ROBES ATTACCCCCCCCCK?! (The Green Robes charged!)"
  • Sheila: Oh, that's just cheating, mate! (Starts beating up the Green Robes by herself)
  • Silverstealth: "YOU'RE DEALING WITH THIEVES, YOU MARSUPIAL C**T?! WHAT DID YOU EXPECT?!"
  • Sheila: AT LEAST SOMETHING BETTER THAN HAVING GOONS!!
  • Silverstealth: WELL TOO BAD!! (The heroes just kept fighting the thieves off)
  • Gee Nee:... Why not just finish them yourself? You're not a genie, so you can kill them in an instant.
  • Master Thief: Oh, right. Let's do it! (He began to try until the experimental lamp dropped in from behind, and it binded genie bands on his arms before he could even attack) WHAT?!? WHAT IS THIS?!
  • Gee Nee: (She saw the lamp)... No! NO!!!
  • Iago: ABOUT TIME!!
  • Master Thief: WHAT DID YOU ALL DO TO ME?!?
  • Icky: We talked to the Genie Council, and we found a way to beat you. You were onto something when we suggested turning you all-powerful. This can turn ANY omnipotent being, into a genie.
  • Joule: Pretty clever, huh? And you know the rules of the genie: A genie without a master, goes back in his lamp.
  • Master Thief:... NO!! I REFUSE TO BE AN ETERNAL SERVANT!! (He tried to fly away until the bands binded him into the area and sucked him into the lamp) NONONONONONOOOOOOO!!!!
  • Gee Nee: NOOO!!! NOO, STOP!!!! MY BABE!!!!
  • Bianca: It's too late, Gee. He's trapped.
  • Master Thief: NONONONOOOOOOO!!!
  • Silverstealth: "DON'T WORRY SIR?! I'LL JUST GRAB YOUR LAMP AND-"
  • Icky, Iago and Group: "WHERE'S THE THIEVES GUILD?!"
  • Silverstealth: ".... Did, we make it that the Failsafe doesn't work if people already found the- (He and other Thieves turned into animals)....."
  • Gee Nee: ".... Darn, and that was a smart failsafe otherwise."
  • DS: "Well since I'm NOT an actual member but a hired professional Espionager, I guess it'll be up to me?! (Makes a Ninja run towards the lamp, but Byrd intersected him)!"
  • Byrd: "I don't believe we are don't yet, gecko!"
  • DS: "Tch, I fought rockhoppers tougher than you."
  • Byrd: "Well, then I'll be sure to ask for them in the future given your impressive array of skills! I could learn a thing or two about those kinds of penguins."
  • DS: "THAT WAS MEANT TO BE AN INSULT?!"
  • Byrd: "But I counter'd it with witty retort."
  • DS: "Oh you smug little ice-box fish-eater?! (Starts fighting him)"
  • Gee Nee: ".... Geez Louise, do I have to do everything here?! (Makes a dash for MT's lamp!)"
  • Jean: UHUH! (The genies came in and restrained her as Master Thief was trapped inside the lamp forever)
  • Gee Nee: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
  • Jean: Gee Nee, in the name of the Genie Council, you are under arrest for reckless and irresponsible use of our powers.
  • Gee Nee: "I'M NOT SPEAKING TILL I GET A LAWYER?!"
  • Jean: "No problem, one is going to be provided to you."
  • DS: "..... Aw nuts, there goes my pay for the day. (Makes a tactical retreat!)"
  • Byrd: "OH NO YOU DON'T, YOU SHADY COUSIN OF THE GEICO LIZARD?! (Chases after DS, but he got away, only for Zoe to teleport him back)"
  • DS: WHA- HEY!!!... Ugh, I hate magic! (He was pinned before he could flee again and cuffed)
  • Byrd: You, sir, aren't going anywhere this time. Gabrielle would want to see you soon and you are going to answer for what you've done, whether you like it or not!
  • Hunter:... Is it over?
  • Elora: Looks like it.
  • Karmie: (Carefully picks up MT's lamp) Okay... so... what are we supposed to do with this?
  • Iago: I dunno, destroy it? That's what I'd do. I've killed Jafar many times via his lamp.
  • Jean: "Now now, we're an ethicist genie council. We're kinda against the death penalty."
  • Iago: "Figures."
  • Icky: "Then you guys better have QUITE the super genie jail then."
  • Gray Genie: "Well, cowinky-dink ya mentioned that."

Later.

  • Master Thief was placed in a Genie Super Jail....
  • Master Thief: "..... Well, at least I avoided being wasted. BUT WHERE'S GEE?!"
  • Warden Genie: "Held in the She-Jinn wing. So to reduce any naughtiness if ya catch my drift."
  • Master Thief: ".... Oy. Should've just stuck with the snake plan. Man that ended up being SO underutilized."
  • (Deadpool): "I know! Wasted opportunity."
  • (MSM): Hey, he was never gonna obey him anyway. If anything, the Lodgers and their new buddies, saved his life. That snake monster would've been insulted by his attempts to use him, and killed him where he stood.
  • (Deadpool):... Yeah, good point.
  • Warden Genie: Hey, he was never going to obey you anyway. If anything, the Lodgers and their new buddies, saved your life. Sandbringer would've been insulted by your attempts to use him, and killed you where you stood.
  • Master Thief:... Yeah, fair argument, I guess.
  • Warden Genie: "So enjoy prison life, buddy. (Poofs off)...."

Dragon Guardian Temple.

  • Lord Shen: "(Tapping foot)..... OKAY, I AM GETTING DEMONSTRIOUSLY INPATIENT WITH THEIR ABSENCE?! Spyro, Cynder, I need you two to find those bird brains?!"
  • Spyro: "Uhhh, actually, I, think I may have an idea what happened. (Gives Shen a News Article)."
  • Lord Shen: "(Takes it) Oh what did those birdbrains do this time?"
  • Icky: (He and Iago came in with their new friends) GUYS! We saved the day for you! You're welcome.
  • Lord Shen: UGH, ABOUT TIME YOU- (He saw their new friends)... Who are your new friends?
  • Spyro:... You actually got all our pre-Lodger post-Malefor friends to help you?
  • Elora: Greetings, Spyro.
  • Sheila: "Hey Spyro, hey Cynder. You two missed a REAL ring-dinger of an adventure, mates!"
  • Lord Shen: "..... What, exactly, happened?"
  • Byrd: "I believe the latest edition of the Dragon Chronicle just about covers it."
  • Lord Shen got to read that....
  • Lord Shen: "..... Mass Thieves Guild Thefts due to Louger reconfiguring stage was finally quelled by two certain Birdbrains and various figures, mass arrests of connected individuals occurred?! Icky and Iago surprisingly more effective on their own then with the lougers?!"
  • Icky: "Well, albeit for these Brian & Stewie style adventure things."
  • Lord Shen: "(Was steaming mad)........ THAT'S IT?! FOR NOW ON, WE ONLY LEAVE TO DO OUR OWN THING ON THE WEEKENDS?! WEEKDAYS, WE ARE ON THIS PLANET FOR THE ENTIRETY?!"
  • Icky: "Yeeeeah, I kinda figured you were gonna say that. Oh and uh, some things to look out for. Not all apes are with Gaul-head, there's alot of anti-dragon tension going on with some other races, Riptocs and Rhynocs espeically, ANNNNNNNNND I think there's an implication that Jake Long's Earth might be in a pickle."
  • Cynder: ".... (Sighs), Figures the memory of Malefor still lingers here."
  • Spyro: "Well hey, I guess Shen's declaration gives us more chances to fix those problems at full force."
  • Lord Shen: "Yes indee- WAIT A MINUTE?! Prehistoric One, WHAT DO YOU MEAN JAKE LONG'S WORLD IS IN TROUBLE?!"
  • Icky: "Well, when I was trying to call Genie for some help into getting the Genie Dimension, he said the Jungle Crew had to deal with some stuff going on in that place. I mean, it's mostly an untested theory, but, since this is the "Jake Long: American Dragon", we suspect this has Dork Dragon written all over it."
  • Lord Shen: "..... D'OH BLOODY HELL?! AND Spongebob and his Companions had already left for Bikini Bottom earlier before because ya started taking too long! Same as Gilda and Trixie!"
  • Iago: "So I take it we're making some stops first?"
  • Lord Shen: "Unfortunately, yes?! But thankfully, only two intermediates!"
  • Zoe: "Yeah, you guys go ahead and do that. We're all adventured out, so, we're just gonna go back to our homes and chill."
  • Sheila: "See ya guys around, don't be afraid to visit!"
  • Byrd: "Just PLEASE ease up on that weird talk these two were doing!"
  • The Dragon Realms Group left.
  • Cynder: ".... Probably not the best way for our old friends to be shown the Lougers."
  • Icky: "Ehh, life happens."
  • Lord Shen: "Alright, enough dilly-dallies! Let's make the other Lougers aware of the situation!"
  • The group entered in.

Epilogue

Jake Long's World

  • The Longs were held down by chains.
  • Dark Dragon came in with Chang and Bananas B, along with Meng Tao and Mercurymon....
  • Dark Dragon: "...... You all, have no idea, what seeing this, means to me! (Chuckles wickedly)!"

Fin.....

(Deadpool): "UP?! NOT YET?! There were actually some unsung members of the Guild that were NEVER addressed! (Changes the scenery!)"

  • A Studious Looking Thief, A Quickster Thief, and a Techno Thief were strolling down the area.
  • Studious Thief: "My, that was an unexpectedly long trip to the black grocery market, but I think we are all finally- (Saw the HQ in ruins)...... OH WHAT THE DEVIL DID WE MISSED THIS TIME?!"
  • Quickster Thief: "'DAWWWWW MAN, DID WE MISSED THE ENTIRE EPISODE?!"
  • Techno Thief: ".... I need to access the camera feed! (They did that)... Yyyyyep, we did."
  • Quickster Thief:... What do we do now?
  • Studious Thief: You're Fast Eddie, you tell us.
  • Fast Eddie: SHUT UP, POINDEXTER!!
  • Studious Thief: Well that's no way to speak to me, Teacher Greta!
  • Fast Eddie: Ugh, Curse our luck! Digits, any plans?!
  • Digits: ".... We're going to need to re-collect the other members in their, incapacitated state and find a way to reverse their forms. Then after words, we'll work on a long-term solution to rescue Gee Nee and the master."
  • Fast Eddie: "Uggggh! Do we have to do this the SLOOOOOW way?!"
  • Greta: Sure, keep whining and we'll do it faster.
  • Fast Eddie: (Sighs)
  • Digits: Look, I'm sorry, it's the only way to restore everything.
  • Fast Eddie: SO WE ACTUALLY GOTTA FIND EACH ONE OF THEM ONE-BY-ONE?! ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?!? THEY'RE ALL OVER THE PLANET!!! HOW CAN WE EVEN TELL IF THEY'RE WHO WE'RE LOOKING FOR?!
  • Digits: "(Pulls out device) Say hello to the member detector."
  • Fast Eddie: ".... Do we, actually have to say hi to it, or-"
  • Digits: No, you moron! I had every member swallow a tracking device, so we can find literally ALL of them.
  • Fast Eddie:... Oh... Well... Why didn't you say so? (The two moaned as they started looking)
  • (Deadpool): "I smell SEQUEL BAIT!"
  • (Scroopfan): "Well that depends on whether or not we would touch the Thieves' Guild again, so, can we end the episode now?"
  • (Deadpool): "Okay, sure. Just making sure something gets addressed."

Fin, for real.

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