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Mauded Pie Theft is the 29th Episode of the 2nd Season of the SpongeBob and Friends Adventures Chronicles series. Legend has it that a legendary rainbow magical rock lies somewhere within Diamond Dog terrortories that would give it's user the power of endless knowledge, and the power of the United Universe, and possability BEYOND! It's commanly refered to by Ponies as The Rainbow Rock of Great Magic, the most valuable, and legendary artifact of power to ever be known about. However, since it was never found, and it's reported location is in Diamond Dog terratory, many presume it's nothing but a humble myth.... Many expect, true believers.... Of which, include Maud Pie, Pinkie Pie's unassuming bore-fest sister from the Canon Episode of the same name, and.... Unfortunately..... Jungie. Jungie, and his spectical accopliseses, Tai Lung, Galaxhar, Makunga, and his leopards, have kidnapped Maud Pie to reveil the way to the Rainbow Rock, opptain it's power, and become a force so superior, even Lord Cobra will regret ever treating him like dirt.... However, will he be able to stand Maud Pie's inability to express emotions, and her dull, dull personally, but most of all, can Pinkie Pie, the rest of the Main 6, and the Lougers stop Jungie's plans?

Transcript

Chapter 1: The Legend of the Rainbow Rock of Great Magic

Anichent Equestia.

  • (Maud Pie): "Long ago, there was a terrorable war between Alicorns and the Draconquui, caused by the tyrant king Tyranny. The Alicorn Gods were forced to sacrivice themselves to finally put a great stop on Tyranny for good. However, they didn't realised of what unintentional creation was borned from their sacrivice."
  • A magical colorful rock appeared.
  • (Maud Pie): "A beautiful, and powerful rock, said to be a forging of the lost souls of the Alicorn Gods, speically a previous Alicorn of Magic, Mana Magic. The rock's beauty wasn't the only thing of note. It was also capable to control, not just Unicorn magic, but magics beyound even that of Alicorns. it can control everything, the elements, the seasons, worlds rotantions, life, death, time, the very cosmos of any universe, even both light.... And Darkness. In throey, the elements of harmony themsleves, in light they were respondsable for the creation of it. It was capable to even make gods and demons bow to it's majusty. Many a mortal, both good and evil, have sought to claim a universely powerful stone..... But.... It was never found."
  • The Stone suddenly vanished.
  • (Maud Pie): "At first, it was thought that the Diamond Dogs had already destroyed it. Then it was believed a conspirity by the Mythic Beast community stolen it and hid it away from the ponies in fear of misuse, some would claim it was partly respondsable for the Fear War, outside of, the one that can't be spoken of. But what was finally accepted, is simply that, it never existed. Though sightings of A cult Diamond Dog group are seen praising a beautiful rock is seen, it can never be proven.... Only true believers will think otherwise."
  • A magical flash is seen!

Modern Day Equestia.

  • Maud Pie is seen at a universeity.
  • Maud Pie: "So far, the rock remains undiscovered, and still considered a legend. But I have been discovering countless evidents and sightings of the Diamond Dog cult holding the rock, that may soon prove otherwise. I am dedicated to prove that, the Rainbow Rock, is real."
  • Universeity colleages are at a mix of curiousity and specticisum.
  • A leading Professor Unicorn male: "Maud Pie, your resheach is, interesting, but, outside of unproven claims and evidents, I'm afraid it can't prove the Rainbow Rock is real."
  • Maud Pie: "Professor Boulder, please, as a fellow rocktoligest, you have to listen!"
  • ???: "Bah! She doesn't even sound emotionally invested."
  • A mean looking Unicorn male. rocktoligest is seen.
  • Professor Boulder: "Oh, good grief, young master Stone Cut, you know well enough that Muad suffers from the mental illness "Emotion Void" syndrone, an extremely rare illness that disables emotions. She can't help it to be as if, she isn't very well invested."
  • Stone Cut: "Irreguardless, YOU of all ponies know as well as I that the Rainbow Rock of Great Magic, is a Rainbow Crock of horseshit! It's just an anichent fairytale made up by anchient deludional drunks! And no one was able to capture this allegded Diamond Dog cult holding the rock! In fact, what is their name, even?"
  • Maud Pie: "The Rainbow Dog cult."
  • Stone Cut: "Anyway, I refuse to beleive in nonsense, professor! And I hope your capable of doing the same, cause NO ONE is gonna fund her reshearch for a mythical rock!?"
  • Professor Blouder: "Just because something is considered a myth, doesn't mean it's automaticly true. I may think it's hard to believe, but I am not quick to doubt like doubters like you. Maud has every right to reshecrh this, and has my support. Also, that documentary crew seemed interested that last week. In fact, the whole universes dosen't seem to be doubtful like you."
  • Stone Cut: "I'm just saying it's a waste of time, effort and money! Not even Celestia and Luna themsleves would actselly be stupid enough to fund her! NOPONY is!"
  • Maud Pie: Oh, really? Well, you must be mistaken. There's still a few out there who still believe the Rainbow Rock is real. I'm gonna prove it to you!
  • Stone Cut: Oh, I doubt that! I bet you can't last 3 days searching for the damn rainbow turd!
  • Professor Blouder: STONE CUT, THAT'S INAPPRO--
  • Maud Pie: I bet you I can.
  • Stone Cut: What?
  • Maud Pie: I'm sure Boulder would agree with it. Right, Boulder? (Takes out her pet rock)...See? He agrees with me.
  • Stone Cut: "........ That's, a freaking pepple."
  • Professor Blouder: Stone, we need to have a nice long chat about respecting fellow workers after this.
  • Stone Cut: "Ok, ok, doc! Sorry, Maud..... Even though I still doubt the throies you have."
  • Maud Pie: Don't mention it. I feel no expressions, remember?
  • Stone Cut: I guess since you were raised on an Amish rock farm, you practicly become a rock.
  • Maud Pie: Not for my sister, Pinkie Pie.
  • Stone Cut: Oh yeah, that pony retard from Ponyville! I--(Maud Pie grabs him by the tie, and pulls him to her, not showing any sense of anger, but notable dissatisfaction)
  • Maud Pie: Listen here, Mister! My sister is NOT a retard! She is a good sister and set a good example to my family when she first gained her cutie mark. You will NOT talk about her like that again or I'll give a whole new meaning to the word 'stoned'! (Her eyes get closer to BStone Cut!) Understand?
  • Stone Cut:...Uh...sure, I guess--(Maud Pie punches him) OW! OKAY, YES!!! LET ME GO, PLEEEE-HEE-HEE-HEEEZZ!!! (Maud does that)...I'm out of here! (Leaves)
  • Professor Boulder: Maud, you know I detest violence.... Not that Stone didn't do anything to deserve it.
  • Maud Pie: Felt good. Haven't felt anything like it in a while.
  • Professor Blouder: "I'm surprised you even reacted like that considering the illness."
  • Maud Pie: All of us have an emotional side, even for ponies like me. But I am sure that Rainbow Rock exists, and I am willing to explore the Rainbow Dog Caverns to find it.
  • Professor Blouder: "That's a risky mission, Maud. The cult, according to legend, while not greedy like most Diamond Dogs cause of being cleaesed by the stone, won't take kindly to intruders who intent to claim it."
  • Maud Pie: Oh, I don't intend to claim it. I want to prove it's real. The Rainbow Dogs can keep the Rainbow Rock. If anyone found out about the Rainbow Rock, it could mean seriousness! Which is why I don't want it for myself or anypony else.
  • Professor Boulder:...Well, if you're sure, then good luck out there.
  • Maud Pie: I'll definitely need it. (They both shake hooves as binoculars are seen looking at them with a familiar chuckle)
  • Junjie: Oh, this is just juicy and sweet at the same time! A rock that can actually control all forms of magic! I'd give ANYTHING to have something like that.
  • Tai Lung: "Junjie, not to sound like I don't believe you, but, even I must admit that, I am abit spectical of a "Magical" Tecnecolor rock guarded by "Pure Diamond Dogs"."
  • Galaxhar: "It sounds like serious brony fanfiction to me."
  • Makunga: "I mean, she has a mental illness, so ALCHOURSE a retard would believe in some so, (laughs), stupid!"
  • Leopard: "No offence sir, but, they do have some points. A stone has never been found and declaired mythical doesn't sound like a good use of Leage reshorses and time."
  • Junjie: ".... We, are the same people, who know the existence of demons and magical artifacts! And the Rainbow Rock is what you doubt?"
  • Tai Lung: "I didn't mean to say it like that, it's just, it has never been found before and-"
  • Junjie: "SILENECE! I know for the fact it's real! Remember when everyone thought Taiklar was a myth?!"
  • Galaxhar: "... Oh yeah..... He turned out to be real, right?"
  • Junjie: You bet your f*****g pussy pansies he was! I MUST have that rock! I'll FINALLY get the recognition I deserve. Even Mang will be begging to get us back to being extremists! IT WILL BE AWESOME!! (Cackles)
  • Tai Lung: Well then, let's get started. What do we do?
  • Junjie:...(Sighs)...You don't remember?
  • Tai Lung: I, uh--
  • Junjie: WE MUST KIDNAP MAUD PIE AND FORCE HER TO HELP US FIND THE ROCK!!! THAT'S ALL WE HAVE TO DO!!! WHAT PART OF THAT DID YOU NOT REMEMBER?!?
  • Tai Lung: Okay, I just needed to know, sheesh!
  • Junjie: Now FOCUS! We'll get started when she's isolated.
  • Makunga: This is gonna be great!
  • Junjie: "My sentiments exactly."

Chapter 2: Maud Pie Gets Marenapped

Later.

  • Maud Pie was in her room, packing.
  • Maud Pie: "I can't believe I am finally gonna be able to find the Rainbow Rock. I had been dreaming of it ever since I was a filly."

Flashback.

  • Mr. Pie: "Ya know girls, my father always told me stories about this magical rainbow rock."
  • Pinkie Pie: "A magical rock? What is that?"
  • Mr. Pie: The Rainbow Rock of Great Magic. It's a... Wait a minute, didn't we already explain it?
  • Filly Maud Pie: (In adult voice) Don't worry about it, I'll cut it out.
  • Pinkie Pie: Wow, how do you do that?
  • Mr. Pie: Well, it's a...

An explanation later...

  • Mr. Pie: ... Rock! (All 3 fillies are in awe)

Present

  • Maud Pie: Wow, that was lazy! But I'm still gonna enjoy it even with this mental illness that makes me sound like Ben Stein. (Finishes packing and goes outside to start her journey as this song plays)
Shrek Soundtrack 11

Shrek Soundtrack 11. The Proclaimers - I'm On My Way

  • Maud Pie: (In the middle of the song, talking on a cell phone) Yeah, Pinkie, I'm already on the trek to the Rock. Isn't it great?

Ponyville

  • Pinkie: (In phone booth) OOH, GOODY! I can't wait to find out if the Rock is real or not.
  • (Maud Pie): Well, if it is, we need to be sure it's safe from the villains you and your friends have to battle 24-7.
  • Pinkie: Oh, we've never lost a single battle against evil! You can count on us.
  • (Maud Pie): Well, I'm off. Tell your friends I said 'hi'!
  • Pinkie: Okey-dokey Lokey! (Hangs up and jumps away happily, and the song continues, and as Maud Pie is seen continuing on her journey, the villains are seen stalking her)

Dirt Field

  • Maud Pie: (After the song ends, she heads out for a patch of several ground holes)... Hmm, that's a lot of holes.
  • ???: And YOU'RE gonna be finding it for us, Mud Pie! (She looks behind her, only to be sacked by Junjie's leopards)
  • Maud Pie: (Expressionless) Hey, let me go! This is no way to treat a lady! I swear to Celestia I will show you no mercy! Let me go this instant!
  • Makunga: (He and Tai Lung look at each other due to Maud Pie's lack of yelling, and start laughing) WOW, WHERE DID THIS PONY COME FROM, UNDER A ROCK?!? (Laughs)
  • Junjie: Let's just find the cave that leads to the... Rock?... (Finds over a dozen holes in the ground)... AW, F***!!!
  • Maud Pie: You guys don't know where the tunnel to the Rock is, do you?
  • Tai Lung: Well, no!
  • Maud Pie: Well, don't expect me to help you out. I don't know where it is, either.
  • Junjie: Well, when we find it, YOU'RE gonna help us find the damn rock. Now, begin the search.
  • Makunga: And how are we gonna know which one has the Rock in it?
  • Tai Lung: We'll just beat the info out of the local Diamond Dogs.
  • Maud Pie: Like that will work.
  • Tai Lung: OH, SHUT UP!!!
  • Galaxhar: "Well, actselly, that is tecnecally a bad idea. The Rainbow Dogs won't be welcoming thanks to the rock protacting them from the mass corruption from that greedy king they once had, and I doubt the less enlighten Diamond Dogs would be better. They'll espeically won't like it that we attacked one of their bretheren. They'll have a reaction worse then a Gagmorkgooseapin!"
  • Junjie: "Ok, we'll just go inside a tunnel! And see where it leads us!"

Ponyville

  • Pinkie:... (Her Pinkie Sense goes off)... Uh-oh!!! (Zooms off to Twilight's Castle)

Twilight's Castle

  • Twilight: (The communications computer had just arrived) Hmm, really nice.
  • Applejack: Not too shabby a design for Kowalski's taste.
  • Discord: I have to admit, it's one of their best.
  • Pinkie: (Bursts inside) GUYS!!! MAUD PIE IS IN DANGER!!!
  • Twilight: What? You weren't with her, how do you know?
  • Pinkie: My Pinkie Sense told me that she's been captured by the Villain League!
  • Rainbow Dash: We never knew your Pinkie Sense could do that.
  • Pinkie: Of course it can!
  • Discord: Well... Okay, who's Maud Pie?
  • Applejack: Pinkie's sister. She has 3 sisters. One of them is Maud Pie. She seems to be as bland as a rock, but she seems to be much more than that.
  • Discord: Well, I guess living on an Amish rock farm does that to you. In fact, how was Pinkie able to become a happy-go-lucky pony while her sister moved on to being as 'bland as a rock'?
  • Pinkie: Ponies are different, Discord. Though she may not be very expressive, I can tell her feelings by heart. I know she still cares for me, and has even saved my life once.
  • Applejack: So you're saying that the Villain League has kidnapped her? Why?
  • Pinkie: She told me that she was on a quest to find the legendary Rainbow Rock of Great Magic.
  • Discord/Twilight: WHAT?!?
  • Discord: Oh, that thing is extremely dangerous to be used by villain hands! The thing was made during the Chaos War, and is now kept underground in a Diamond Dog tribe that is non-corruptible cause of the darn thing!
  • Twilight: Yes, I have read of such a rock in the books. Too bad they were all destroyed during the battle against Tirek, and Celestia is still working on to give me the replacements.The only thing I remember about it is it could control any form of magic, including the Elements of Harmony.
  • Discord: If you ask me, it would've been smart of me to get that rock when I was still evil, otherwise I wouldn't have been stopped.
  • Rainbow Dash: Well, good thing you weren't that smart.
  • Discord: I'd otherwise be offended by that, but quite. Not that I could get it anyway, the Rainbow Dogs are ultra-protective of the Rock, and will not hesitate to show no mercy to even the toughest of intruders. Even I would be torn to pieces.
  • Pinkie: Maud Pie said she only wanted to prove it to be real, and not take it for studies. For an expressionless pony, she has a good heart and a generous mind.
  • Twilight: Well, it's a good time for us to finally use the communication computer. (Turns on the device)
  • Rarity: "Wait a minute, The Rainbow Rock of Great Magic? Rainbow Dogs? I thought those were myths."
  • Discord: "Oh trust me. The Draconquui are among the only things that know that thing is legit! Trouble is, cause of our surreal tendingcies, you ponies tend to think we're not "reliable" or "creditable" for that thing. In fact, some Draconquui are the reason why the thing was never found. And we had a good reason! That thing can be an easy "Congure the world" card to even the most seemingly harmless villain! Hell, even someone like Doofinshirts could become the biggest cheese in villainy with that rock! I hate to think what leager is power-hungry enough to want their mits on it!"
  • Rainbow Dash: "Well, there's three canidates: Mang Cobra, cause he always want to use something to destroy Equestia as what it is, a paradise, Jafar, cause he's a power-hungry maniac, and Junjie, who has alot of personal problems that stone would fix in ten, seconds, flat!"
  • Applejack: "But which one of those varmits is the most likely?"
  • Twilight: "That's what the lougers will find out!"

Dragon Temple

  • Lord Shen: (The Dragon Temple is surrounded by gremlins, who are doing crazy damage to the place) ICKY, WHAT THE HELL?!?
  • Icky: I WASN'T IN A GREMLIN HIVE!!!
  • Lord Shen: THEN WHERE DID ALL THESE PESTS COME FROM?!?
  • Ignitus: GET THE GREMLIN SPRAY!!!
  • Alex: I got it! (The switch is only 10ft away with gremlins swarming around the perimeter of it. Alex takes deep breaths, shivers, and runs for it while dodging the gremlins' attacks, and jumps over to the switch in slow motion) You're going DOWN, finicky marauding gremlin GUYS! (Flips switch, and a gas is sprayed into the Temple which causes the gremlins to get sick, and retreat, leaving the Lodgers (Who are wearing gas masks) to sigh in relief)
  • Iago: I thought those psychos would NEVER leave! They love to play with whatever machinery they can find. (The gas wears away, and they all remove their masks)
  • Icky: Sorry for leading them here, guys. They started everything for ruining my iPod!
  • Lord Shen: DO YOU KNOW THAT IT'S A BAD IDEA TO MESS WITH A GREMLIN HIVE?!? People have been known to die in blackouts and power outages caused by those pests!
  • Kowalski: (Beeping is heard)... Well, punishing Icky will have to wait. We have an incoming call from Equestria!
  • Lord Shen: "Well, that was quick. We placed in that communicater ever since the Bonebreaker mess, and already there's a situation."
  • Boss Wolf: "Ahh, Equestia has a history of attacting trouble, what ya gonna do?"
  • Kolwalski answers it.
  • Kolwalski: "Kolwalski here. What's the matter in the herd this time?"
  • Pinkie: MY SISTER, MAUD PIE, HAS BEEN KIDNAPPED BY THE VILLAIN LEAGUE!!!
  • Skipper: D'OH! You've gotta be kidding me, what has Pinkie EVER done to them?... I guess it wouldn't matter because they're just jerks to everyone.
  • Rainbow Dash: I'm sure we've already told you about one of Pinkie's 3 sisters. Maud Pie had visited us sometime in the 4th Season, and she developed a mental illness that kept her from feeling major emotions.
  • Icky: Oh, yeah, Pinkie's oddball sister, Maud! I heard she became a petrologist recently.
  • Pinkie: Don't you mean rockologist? She never had a fascination of studying pets.
  • Kowalski: That's not a real word, Pinkie! It's actually called 'petrology', the study of rocks.
  • Pinkie: Potato tomato! You call it however you want, I'll still call it rockology because it's easier to pronounce.
  • Skipper: See, Kowalski? Someone who actually agrees with how sciency you sound.
  • Kowalski: Skipper, please! Girls, explain what Maud Pie was doing when she was kidnapped.
  • Pinkie: She was on a trip to a Diamond Dog prairie to find a legendary rock called The Rainbow Rock of Great Magic. Said to control various forms of magic, even the Elements of Harmony.
  • Shifu: Then it's obvious who we're up against!
  • Everyone: Junjie!
  • Shifu: Yes. It's bad enough he once tried to take us over, and now he wants the Villain League to go back to their early days as extremists, but I can't imagine what he'll do with a rock that can control magic as powerful as the Elements of Harmony. He could actually succeed.
  • Sandy: We can't let that happen!
  • Lord Shen: Indeed.
  • SpongeBob: Then I guess we're off to Equestria!... Again.
  • Tigress: But some of us will need to stay behind and repair the damages caused by the gremlin swarm.
  • Icky: Oh, don't tell me I'm going to have to stay behind! I serve as comic relief, remember?
  • Shifu: We are not letting you stay behind. We stated we would decide your punishment later.
  • Lord Shen: Batty, of course, is still in trouble after that whole incident with Robin Williams and the Grim Reaper, but we still need more to help out. BW, you feel like sparing some of your wolves to help Batty out?
  • Boss Wolf: Yes, sir! (Howls, and some of the wolves appear) Half of you, make this place spiffy clean by the time we get back. The rest of you will come with us.
  • Wolves: SIR, YES, SIR!!
  • Iago: Whoa, since when were your wolves like that?
  • Boss Wolf: Don't ask!
  • SpongeBob: Well, again, I guess we're off to Equestria!

Chapter 3: Underground Rescue Trek

An Underground cavern

  • Junjie: "Ok, we already tried 499,009,231 holes already! This better be the right one?!"
  • Tai Lung: "This has started to take more then it should."
  • Makunga: "Maybe this rock is a myth that is that. A myth!"
  • Galaxhar: "Besides, the odds of this being the correct hole are a million to-"
  • A leopard: "Sir! There's an underground utopian city here!"
  • Junjie: "What!?"
  • Tai Lung, Makunga, and Galaxhar: "WHAT!?"
  • Maud Pie: "(Emotionless) What?"
  • They all check the hole, and discover a lost city.
  • Junjie: "Ahh..... This must be a city where the Diamond Dogs were once a decent race.... Then the benifit of pony slaves drove them all mad for greed! Now this city is but a wreck."
  • Galaxhar: "I am just spaceballing here..... But if I were to be leader of a cult dedicated to a magical rock, this is where I would hide my cult. No one would think to investigate a lost city."
  • Maud Pie: "I never thought I would be able to see the lost city of "Bow-Wow"."
  • Tai Lung and Makunga laughed!
  • Makunga: "I know these guys are dog based, but, Bow-Wow?! SERIOUSLY?! (LAUGHS)!"
  • Galaxhar: "Yes.... Charmingly amusing but predictable dog pun."
  • Junjie: "As much as it would be an interesting history lesson to learn more about this, lost gem, but I have bigger aspirations! Pony! I want you to tell me, has your resherch pinpointed the possable hide-out anywhere in this city?"
  • Maud Pie still looks emotionless.
  • Junjie: "........ Uh..... I just issued a demand........ Where are these Rainbow Dogs hiding in this city?"
  • Maud Pie: How would I know that? It's pointless to keep me around because of my little knowledge of the Rock's locations. Plus, the Rainbow Dogs are hard to fight off. You'd be torn to pieces if you tried to get the Rock from out of their noses.
  • Tai Lung: Then we'll have to pass off as your assistants. We shall take the Rock when they least expect it.
  • Galaxar: And don't think we don't have the power to punish you for getting any ideas! We know where your sister, Pinkie Pie, lives! We'll have her picked off faster than you can say 'rock rubble ruckus'!
  • Maud Pie: What makes you think she might not find out about your plan, then?
  • Junjie: What are you talking about? You have no radio, no witnesses, no help! HOW CAN THAT PINK BRAT POSSIBLY KNOW YOU'RE IN DANGER?!?
  • Maud Pie: Don't you remember her Pinkie Sense?
  • Makunga: And how would that supernatural phenomenon tell her that we kidnapped you? All we know about it is it's an unexplainable precognitive ability she got from pissing off witches and is something that not even Kowalski can figure out! (Everyone laughs)
  • Maud Pie: For your information, smarty-pants, it's not from witches!
  • Makunga: It was a joke, bland-ass!
  • Junjie: The point is that you're helping us sneak into the city and help us get that rock! Disobey us, and Pinkie Pie dies!
  • Maud Pie: Good luck capturing her. She's too unpredictable, and her Pinkie Sense will protect her.
  • Junjie:...(Camera on the holes in the prairie) DAMN!!!
  • Tai Lung: HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO GET THIS BITCH TO COOPERATE?!?
  • Makunga: "That is a conumbdrum! It's not like we have, like, I don't know, a darkness sprite or anything?"
  • ???: "Oh, that's me!"
  • A small Tinkle Bell recolor appeared.
  • The Spite: "Hi! My name is Darkly Chell. I'm a darkness spirite!"
  • Junjie: ".... What the hell are ou doing here of all places?"
  • Darkly: "Well, I have been like, looking for that stone for 1000 years ever since it was first created! I need it to save the Darkness Spirites from extintion so we can reap horrorable vengence against the light spirite and plunge the world of Equestia to an endless viod of suffering and misery! Ok?"
  • Junjie: "..... Wow..... I think that whole "wanting to plunge Equestia into darkness" is what made the Light sprites geniside your people to near extintion..... But overall totally over-kill for those accursed light sprites! I'll see to it that once I get to be the one who does what your kind wanted to do, I'll see to it I'll use the stone's life and death malmitulation to bring your spieces out of the path of extintion!"
  • Darkly: "You will?"
  • Junjie: "Alchorse! Us villains need to stay togather! Now, everyone! Let us carry on! We'll first find a private place to get Maud more willing to play along with our desires."
  • The Villains walked on with a robed Maud.
  • Darkly felt as if she started to fall in love with Junjie.

Later.

  • The villains have fell asleep in a broken house in the city.
  • Darkly was hovering over Junjie.

(This music plays as she sings, followed by a demented fansity senquence.)

Rio 2 Soundtrack - Track 9 - Poisonous Love by Jemaine Clement and Kristin Chenoweth

Rio 2 Soundtrack - Track 9 - Poisonous Love by Jemaine Clement and Kristin Chenoweth

  • Junjie awoke scared!
  • Junjie: "YIKES!...... Oh.... I just had a nightmare.... Somehow NOT related to Mang Cobra...."
  • Junjie sees his accomplieses asleep.
  • Junjie: "WAKE UP YOU IDIOTS?!" (All the villains scream in surprise)
  • Tai Lung: AAAHHH, RIGHT IN MY EARS!!!
  • Junjie: We've had enough time to rest, now it's time to GET OUR ASSES UP AND FIND A WAY TO BRIBE MAUD PIE!!!
  • Galaxar: (Sighs) It's 4:00 in the morning, Junjie!
  • Junjie: Well, I say we STILL get up! NOW GET UP!!! (Everyone shrugs) Don't you 'UUGGGGHHH' me, you idiots! We're not gonna let time go by for anyone to know of our plans. If Pinkie's supernatural sense DID warn her of our plans, we have to move as late as we can!
  • Makunga: But we still need sleep!
  • Junjie: Then have THESE! (Puts some pills in water bottles and hands them to the villains) They have stimulants, they'll keep you focused!
  • Makunga:...If you say so. (They each drink)
  • Darkly: ("I don't have to sleep. Especially because I can't miss a single glimpse of your face!") (Sighs in joy)
  • Junjie: Now come on, we have work to do! Wait, where Maud?
  • ???: "Over here."
  • Maud was seen eating a rock.
  • Junjie: "..... Are you.... Eating stone? A rock? Why......?"
  • Maud Pie: What? You've never tried them? They taste like...well, rocks.
  • Tai Lung: That is seriously gross!
  • Maud Pie: What, dinosaurs in other worlds do that, don't they?
  • Junjie:...Okay, let's just go before she gets sick.
  • Maud Pie: Hey, I don't get sick doing this. How I resist it I'd rather not say.
  • Tai Lung: (Barfs)...Sorry.
  • Junjie: LET'S GO ALREADY!!! We'll worry about this lady's pica later!

Meanwhile.

  • The Lougers and the Main 6 arrived at the pierre.
  • Icky: "Gees, it's like we're in brown swiss cheese land! Look at all these holes!"
  • Twilight: "I heard when Rover, Spot and Fido's group joined Nefarious, alot of Diamond Dogs moved here. Only one group is the Rainbow Dogs.... Others, typical bandits and rouges."
  • Skipper: "Kolwalski, do you have a way to scan for Junjie and his cronies?"
  • Kolwalski: "Well, I have been exspearimenting with a tracer capable to follow documented villains."
  • Private: Will it work this time?
  • Kowalski: It's still experimental, Private! There's no telling if this thing will work or not, but I've worked on it so much, it might get the job done. (Turns on the device)
  • Tracer Voice: Go straight ahead! (The tracer's screen points to one of the holes)
  • Kowalski: See? What did I tell you? Nothing can go wrong!

12 seconds later...

  • Tracer Voice: Go 7 meters left!
  • Kowalski: WHAT?!? WE JUST GOT HERE!!!
  • Skipper: Nothing can go wrong, huh?
  • Kowalski: Don't worry, it's probably just a glitch.

Later...

  • Kowalski: OH, FOR THE LOVE OF EINSTIEN, THIS IS A F*****G PIECE OF JUNK!!!
  • Private: Have you tried recalculating it?
  • Kowalski: Huh...good point. (Presses button)
  • Tracer Voice: Recalculating route...Go straight ahead for 3 meters.
  • Kowalski: HAH! I knew we would get through this fine!

10 seconds later...

  • Kowalski: BULL F*****G S***!!! We're back at the same problem again!
  • Skipper: (Sighs) I always knew Kowalski's inventions went haywire, but not ONE of them were GODDAMN ANNOYING!!!
  • Rico: What about Nanites?
  • Skipper: Oh, yeah, those DID annoy me, didn't they?
  • Private: They annoyed ALL of us, Skipper!
  • Skipper: I couldn't have said it better myself.
  • Icky: Well, now that Kowalski's tracer has been annoying the hell out of us for a full hour, what're we gonna do?
  • Kowalski: (Sighs until the tracer lights up)...Wait a minute! I think it's picking something up! (They follow the tracer to the hole with the city in it)...Wow! I never knew Diamond Dogs lived in civilizations.
  • Discord: Yeah, this is the city of...(Scoffs)...Bo...Bo...(Scoffs)...BOW-WOW!!! (Laughs)
  • Twilight: It's true, it's called Bow-Wow!...(Everyone bursts out laughing)
  • Rainbow Dash: What, was the founding leader suffering from mental retardation?!? (Laughs)
  • Twilight: Hey, you can't blame them! Diamond Dogs have IQs of 70. They're all awkward but still very smart.
  • Rarity: Not to mention they smell like a common dog's behind!
  • Francis: I beg your pardon?!?
  • Rarity: Sorry, forgot dogs are in the Lodge!
  • Francis: Yeah, sure you did.
  • Twilight: According to the books, Bow-Wow was abandoned long ago due to pony slaves driving them to greed, causing them to...well...I'd rather not say the outcome, but now it's an abandoned wreck of a city. Espeically when the Diamond Dog king fell and was turned to stone for his corruption.
  • Rainbow Dash: "So, is that why alot of them became jerks like the ones that tried to kidnap Rarity?"
  • Pinkie: "Well, all except the ones that formed a cult for the Rainbow Rock. It's been said the stone protacted them from the mass corruption."
  • Rarity: "Goodness, and here many ponies thought that the Diamond Dogs were always nothing but brutes and bandits! Nopony ever thought they, had some civilised decenty."
  • Icky: "Well why else do they have armor and some amount of clothing?"
  • Rarity: "Well, wild Goblins and Hobgoblins have clothing, but they don't have communities as big as, this! They're village tribal at best!"
  • Iago: "So, was something like THIS was Celestia trying to prevent when she ended slavery? To prevent the other races self-corrupting themselves as bad as the Diamond Dogs?"
  • Twilight: "It's possable. The fact that the Diamond Dogs valued pony slavery so much, they lost their neutrol statis and.... Well, history explains it better then me. And we know about Shineflare's horrorable exspirience with that rich griffin family. From my standpoint, that self-corruption was spreading, and Celestia made a right desidion to stop it while it was still preventable."
  • Icky: "Well, it was obvious killing off slavery had bad effects as well. Remember Griff, Blueblood's griffin crony?"
  • Lord Shen: Oh, don't remind me of that time! I almost lost the pony I loved on that day. I mean, she had to do it because slavery is wrong. And we all know it. But we had no idea how Griff had relied on that so much, he would have a ruined life. We were at a crossroads. Slavery was wrong, but ruining Griff's life by abolishing it was also wrong. Celestia had a reason to have a mental breakdown. I--
  • Po: Whoa, Shen, why are you talking so quickly?
  • Lord Shen:...BECAUSE I ALMOST LOST CELESTIA THEN!!! (Falls down crying)
  • Po: But we're lucky she's still alive, right?
  • Lord Shen: Yeah, but why think about that painful time at a time like this? We need to get down to Bow-Wow--(Laughs) NOW I'M FEELING BETTER!!! (Laughs, along with Po) Well, what the hell are we standing around for, we have a pony to save.
  • Rarity: Let's hope Maud is still keeping her spirits high down there.

Chapter 4: Things Soon Become Dull As A Rock

City Ruins.

  • Maud Pie was still expressionless.
  • Galaxhar: ".... That pony's lack of even minor emotion has started to weird me out."
  • Tai Lung: "Yes, it's almost, utterly unsettling."
  • Makunga: "Not to mention, BOR-RING! Never am I used to a hostage that doesn't even have the wrong emotions for being a leage hostage! EVEN the most boring guy in the world would at least complain ONCE about being a leage hostage?!"
  • Junjie: "Shut up! We need to find that cult and the stone!"
  • Giant Statues of Diamond Dog soldiers with spears are seen.
  • Tai Lung: "I see these dogs used to have, some kind of culture before they became nothing but treasure lusting goons."
  • Galaxhar: "Indeed. I wish I would have the pleasure to study these cultures."
  • Makunga: "Oh it's not like it's well preserved anyway."
  • ???: "Stone-a. Stone-a. Stone-a."
  • Junjie: "Hold it you fools!"
  • Darkly: "(Gasps), what is it, Junjie?"
  • Junjie: "QUIET!"
  • Diamond Dogs in robes are seen a few feet from them, lead by a robe hooded leader.
  • ???: "Those who trepessed on the lost city of Bow-Wow, prepare to be punished, (reveils himself to have the head of Pluto), by the famed cult, Rainbow Dogs."
  • The Leader brings out a magical rainbow stone.
  • The Leader: "So said, Master, URANUS!"
  • Silence.
  • The Villains laughed out of control!
  • Galaxhar: "THAT IS THE MOST UNFORTUNATE NAME TO HAVE SINCE SHAMUS POOPDECK MCFARTY!?"
  • Makunga: "Wha-what's your sister's name? Mianus?!"
  • Makunga laughs loudly after a weese!
  • Tai Lung laughs!
  • Junjie: "(LAUGHS), I thought Bow-Wow was a stupid name, but, being named after a poorly desided name for a planet?! GA!-HA-HA-HA!? That totally elmininates any threat in you!"
  • Master Uranus: "......."
  • Master Uranus used the colorful stone to awaken the giant stone Diamond Dogs, who point their giant pointy spears that the villains!
  • Junjie: "..... Ah..... The Rainbow Rock, I presume.... Tai Lung, take care of these stupid anichent statues."
  • Tai Lung: "Gladly." (Tries kicking down the rocks, but the impact does nothing)...AAAOOOOOOWWWWW!!! (Falls to the ground holding his hurt foot) WHAT ARE THESE THINGS MADE OF?!?
  • Master Uranus: Arrest them immediately! (The Diamond Dogs shackle the villains)
  • Diamond Dog #1: What about that pony over there?
  • Master Uranus:...Hmm...Escort her to my throne room. I think she may not be with these guys.
  • Diamond Dog #1: Yes, sir!
  • Maud Pie: You're letting me go?
  • Master Uranus: Yes. I can tell from your eyes that you're a petrologist who wants to study the Rainbow Rock.
  • Maud Pie:...Wow, you seem to know everything, don't you?
  • Master Uranus:...Uhh...Does your expression ever change?
  • Maud Pie: Never.
  • Master Uranus:...Okay, come with me. Take the villains away!
  • Tai Lung: Well, THAT didn't work!
  • Junjie: (Sighs) Sucks I didn't take the time to find a way to--
  • Diamond Dog #2: NONE SHALL TALK DURING IMPRISONMENT!
  • Makunga: Or what, are you gonna drool on us? (Laughs until the Diamond Dog growls at him angrily)...Shutting up!
  • Darkly is seen hidden.
  • Darkly: "Well.... That could've gone better."

Meanwhile, in another part of the city.

  • Icky: "Wow, this place is HUGE! How was this NOT discovered before?"
  • Lord Shen: "Perhaps the local rouge dogs were a concerned problem."
  • Rarity: "I wouldn't be surprised if the stone was hidden here."
  • Boss Wolf: "Don't worry guys. This wolf has the eyes of a hawk, ears of a fox, and relfexes like a cat!"
  • A spear was pointed at Boss Wolf!
  • Boss Wolf: "YA?!"
  • Diamond Dog troops surrounded the heroes.
  • Po: "..... I think your hawk eyes, fox ears, and cat reflexes need fine-tuning."
  • Boss Wolf: "Shut up."
  • ???: "At ease boys. Something tells me these guys are harmless."
  • A group of commanding Diamond Dogs that are Diamond Dog versons of the main cast from the modern Pound Puppies show.
  • Rainbow Dash: ".... What the..... What are the cast of that modern Pound Puppies show doing here?"
  • Diamond Dog #1: I think he has us confused for the guys on my favorite show!
  • Diamond Dog #2: I know, I mean, I've grown up with them my whole life, which is saying something since our growth spans are VERY short!
  • Diamond Dog #3: (Chuckles) They look rather funny! Do you have peanut butter?
  • Diamond Dog #4: They seem relatively harmless, alright! I'm the smartest of us, and I can tell that they're heroes. They have massive numbers, and are accompanied by 6 ponies. An entire villain force wouldn't do such a thing and risk their own team's safety.
  • Diamond Dog #5: That's what you always say, girl! Even a 1st-grader could tell they're not after the Rock.
  • Rainbow Dash: Yep, they're definitely similar.
  • Icky: Well, it's not the first time we've seen ripoff characters.
  • Diamond Dog #1: What do they call you strangers?
  • SpongeBob: We're...the Shell Lodge Squad?
  • Diamond Dog #5: THE Shell Lodge Squad?
  • SpongeBob: You've heard of us?
  • Diamond Dog #3: We've seen you on TV, we definitely know who you are. You've been rescuing our world for years.
  • Sandy: Well, ain't THAT quaint? We have strangers that have actually heard of us.
  • Rarity: "I didn't know Diamond Dogs have actcess to modern convinecnes."
  • Squidward: "I didn't knew they knew what TV is."
  • Leader Dog: "Hey, considering what the rest of our bretheren are like, can't say we blame you for thinking like that."
  • Tigress: Well...who are you guys?
  • Leader Dog: My name is Captain Alpha! And this is Éclair...
  • Diamond Dog #2 (Éclair): Hi!
  • Leader Dog (Alpha): THIS is Nibbler...
  • Diamond Dog #3 (Nibbler): (Chuckles) A talking loaf of cheese!
  • Alpha: This is Tart...
  • Diamond Dog #4 (Tart): Awesome genius in science and mechanics!
  • Alpha: And this is Cracker.
  • Diamond Dog #5 (Cracker): Yo, what's up?
  • Icky: "Listen, we came to warn you guys that a couple of leage goons are coming after the rainbow rock with a hostage! They're a short fox, a buff leopard, a dork alien, a fat-ass lion, and a expressionless pony, their hostage. The fox, REALLY brags how great and abused he is. Personally, he's the most annoying of those 4."
  • Nibbler: You think they're talking about the guys we caught earlier, boss?
  • Alpha: I'm sure they are, Nibbler. We've already found them. We've got them all in a cell and the gray pony hostage is with our leader, Master Uranus.
  • Icky: You guys caught them already? Wow, you must be some really secure dogs, wait, your leader is named Master Uranus?
  • Sparx: What kind of a name is THAT?
  • Spyro: Sparx, let's not go to that route, these guys might have already got this covered.
  • Éclair: Of course. We're not like other Diamond Dogs, we are much smarter and more strategic. Us Rainbow Dogs do whatever we can to keep the Rainbow Rock safe from the hands of those who are not worthy or destined for it's power. Without it, we'd be as stupid as the rest of our kind.
  • Cracker: Not to mention stark-raving greedy and evil.
  • Twilight: Well, we came to rescue the pony hostage and keep your rock safe. I'm guessing you might need us in case those villains ever escape and get the Rock when we're not looking.
  • Alpha: Oh, trust me, we NEVER take our eyes off of that Rock. We have guards watch over it, and have their schedules well-thought out and good enough for them to keep the Rock safe. If someone even hid in the shadows of the Rock Holding Room, we'd attack on sight. We're Diamond Dogs, and nothing can evade our sights with our smell and night-vision.
  • Spyro: Still, you might need our help. Plus, we need to make sure that the pony is okay.
  • Éclair: She's fine. She's in the Throne Room talking with Master Uranus.
  • Pinkie: Well, thank Celestia for that! I thought she was a goner!
  • The Group went on, as they were secretly watched by Darkly, who was giggling quietly like a cute witch.

Castle Ruins.

  • Alpha: "You see, for awhile now, Master Uranus has been studing the thing to learn how to create a pourifying magic wave that'll pourify all the Diamond Dogs in Equestia..... Trouble is, it would only ever work as long as all generations of Diamond Dogs are accounted for, and well...."
  • Nibbler: "That mean tincan alien guy took one particular pack away from us!"
  • Alpha: "Yeah, the ones with Rover, Fido and Spot in them. I know they were trouble to you guys, and admitingly, they did used to be jerks even before the mass corruption made them worse, but Uranus doesn't want any dog left behind. So, that plan is, under hiatus till we can get those three back in Equestia where they belong."
  • Icky: "Trouble is, Nefarious is so desperate to have any followers at all, espeically when the Leage and Scourge snagged all the better villains, that glassdome-head will take all he can take, even if they're guys like Doffinshirts, who to me, is more of a misguided moron then an actual villain. Heck, he doesn't even act like he seriously resents to parry the platapus. It's like the poor sap's is more like, a fickle friend then a real enemy."
  • Sparx: Yeah, more like frenemies.
  • Éclair: Still, it will be possible that they will think that guy is so crazy, they'll have to quit the team entirely and stick to stealing diamonds again.
  • Baloo:...You know, that's actually an accurate assumption.
  • Bagheera: Yeah, they are not the ones to resist how ANNOYING Nefarious is.
  • Icky: I'm surprised they've been able to handle his craziness and complaining without having to shout 'SHUT THE F*** UP!!!'...Not that they would do that to their leader, anyway. But I'm sure they'd still crack.
  • Rarity: Indeed. I always knew them as (Diamond Dog impression) "OOOH, THIS PONY IS ANNOYING, SHE'S ALWAYS WHINING LIKE A PUSSY! OOOH, THIS PONY IS JUST SO ANNOYING, CAN SOMEDOGGY GET THIS DAMN MULE TO SHUT UP?!? OOOH, I HATE THIS BITCH, SHE IS CRYING LIKE A FOAL!!! OOOH, LET'S JUST GET RID OF HER BEFORE WE HAVE A TRAUMATIC BREAKDOWN!!!". Just like that.
  • Applejack:...Wow, Rarity, that was actually a pretty good impression of them.
  • Pinkie: Not to mention HILARIOUS!
  • Rarity: It's all in the throat.
  • Cracker: (Chuckles) You guys are funny!
  • Spyro: "Well, maybe this would be one of those less troublesome missions."
  • Lord Shen: "Be on your toes reguardless. Karma has a tendingcy to be, a fickle mistress."

Throne Room

  • Master Uranus: Well, it is nice to get to know you, Ms. Maud Pie. I'm amazed at how you can react even with no emotions. I know a few members of my kingdom who have developed that same mental illness.
  • Maud Pie: Well, it's at least good for me to finally be rid of those jerks you imprisoned. They were trying to find a way to bribe me into passing them off as my assistants so I could get the Rock. Thank Celestia they never found one. By the way, have you found a black pixie flying around lately, because she was with them.
  • Master Uranus: A black pixie? As in African-American pixie?
  • Maud Pie: No, no, no! I mean 'black' as in 'dark fairy', her name is Darkly Chell. You seen her?
  • Master Uranus:...No, I haven't seen one of them around. She must've been invisible or was hiding. I'll order my guards to be on the lookout for her.
  • Maud Pie: Good, because she could be the perfect person to steal the Rock from under our noses. (They both realize)
  • Master Uranus: Oh, boy! I need to double the security of the Rock! If there really IS a Dark Pixie out there, we need to capture her.
  • ???: Excuse me, sir? (The Pound Puppy look-alikes appear with the Lodgers and the Mane 6) These guys came to rescue the gray pony and help protect the Rock.
  • Maud Pie: Pinkie? Well, you came her pretty fast.
  • Pinkie: I'm just glad you're safe, sis! (They both hug)
  • Maud Pie: These Diamond Dogs have captured those kidnappers and kept me here to speak with the leader.
  • Alpha: Yeah, we already told them.
  • Master Uranus: Hmm, they don't look quite like the hero types.
  • Sparx: I-ju-BAH-mu-WHAT?!? THAT'S THE FIRST THING YOU SAY ABOUT US?!?
  • Spyro: SPARX, that's no way to talk to a leader!
  • Banzai: Yeah, for God's sake, get some balls! Show some respect to leaders for once.
  • Sparx: (Sighs) Fine!
  • Master Uranus:...Are you all always like that?
  • Bagheera: Don't mind Sparx, sir. We've got a bit of a thing for cracking out comedy. It's our thing.
  • Cracker: These guys are the renowned Shell Lodge Squad!
  • Master Uranus: Is that right? I have heard so much about how you guys have saved our world from evil.
  • Mushu: Oh, you are too kind!
  • Donkey: So where are those crazy villains who want that Rock? I'll give 'em a piece of my mind!
  • Pinkie: Ew, why would you tear off a part of your brain and give it to them?
  • Patrick: I know, that's just nasty!
  • Squidward: (Face palms himself) He means a serious beating!
  • Patrick: Oh...I don't get it.
  • Squidward: (Sighs in annoyance)
  • Master Uranus: "Alchourse. But you must also be on a look out for a dark fairy."
  • Maud Pie: "She claims to be part of a near-extint race called, "Darkness Sprites"."
  • Trixie: "DARKNESS SPRITES?!"
  • Twilight: "Darkness Sprites!? But, Celestia told me they were all destroyed by the light sprites being forced to stop them perimently, when.... When....."
  • Icky: "Oh what so bad about a bunch of little bug-wing people?"
  • Twilight: Well...they were trying thrust eternal misery and suffering on Equestria, even before Tyranny. That's why their polar opposites called Light Sprites were forced to eradicate them all to protect everything in Equestia. Everypony thought they were all gone, but some rumors have went around that not all of them were destroyed. Some went in hiding and tried to evade the Light Sprites and rebuild their numbers to destroy them all and re-take the Crystal Empire. Most ponies thought that was not true, but I guess it IS true now that Maud Pie claims to have seen one.
  • Maud Pie: Not to mention she acted strange in front of that crazy fox. Almost as if...she was in love with him.
  • Icky:...(Shivers in disgust) That's wrong in so many ways, I hardly know where to begin.
  • Master Uranus: Well, if you guys are looking for the prisoners, they're in the dungeon over there. (Points out a hallway)
  • Patrick: Thanks for that, Master Urinus! D'OH, URINUS?!? (Laughs) I-I-I said 'Urinus'! (Laughs) I just jinxed myself for that one! (Laughs)
  • Icky: Okay, that WAS pretty funny.
  • Master Uranus: Oh, you can't tell me how many times my prisoners have called me that. It's a meme that I've probably gotten use to. Now carry on. (They all enter the hallway)

Dungeon

  • Galaxhar: ".... Well, this could've, gone better."
  • Tai Lung: "If they think these mere iron bars can hold me, then they-"
  • Junjie: "Tai Lung don't! I think the leader did something to the bars that-"
  • Tai Lung: (Kicks the bars, but they not only hurt his leg, but zap him. He then lays on the ground holding his leg as he jolts in electricity)
  • Junjie:...That made them indestructible and electric.
  • Tai Lung: IT'S BAD ENOUGH THE CRAP THEY MAKE IS INDESTRUCTIBLE, BUT WHERE THE FLYING F*** DID THEY DISCOVER ELECTRICITY?!? THIS ISN'T SECRET OF NIMH, IT'S A CHRONICLES EPISODE!!! NOW BOTH MY FEET ARE HURT!!! THIS IS ABSOLUTELY RIDICULOUS!!! OOOWWW!!!
  • Makunga: Geez, Tai Lung, don't be a pussycat now! (Laughs)
  • Galaxar: None of your jokes are funny, Makunga! You've been telling them for a while!
  • Makunga: Okay, I'll stop.
  • Junjie: You know, being stuck in here with YOU ALL isn't making this any easier. If I had found a way to bribe Maud a while ago, we wouldn't have been stuck in this dungeon!
  • ???: Hello, Junjie! (The Lodgers and ponies appear)
  • Junjie:...Uh...Hey, guys! You're looking good. You all been working out or something?...New haircut, new wardrobe, p**** enhancement--
  • Icky: OKAY, THAT LAST ONE WAS JUST NASTY!!!
  • Pinkie: HOW DARE YOU KIDNAP MY SISTER, YOU BIG JERKS?!? (Grabs Junjie by the neck) IF I WASN'T AFRAID OF VIOLENCE, I'D DO THINGS MORE GRUESOME THAN IN OUR MLP FANFICS!!!
  • Junjie: Now, now, let's not get all angry about this!
  • Donkey: And why not, you big foxhole?!?
  • Junjie: (Gasps) HOW DARE YOU USE SUCH A FOUL NAME?!?
  • Donkey: Oh, what're you gonna do about it, foxhole?
  • Junjie: Okay, you're REALLY pissing me off!
  • Donkey: What's that, foxhole?
  • Junjie: Say it again, I dare you!
  • Donkey: Foxhole!
  • Puss: Okay, this is already getting tedious.
  • Donkey: Shut up, cathole!
  • Puss: WHA--(Stutters)
  • Mushu: Oh, SNAP!! You just got owned!
  • Puss: Oh, shut it, dragonhole!
  • Mushu: WHAT DID YOU JU--I-WHA-WELL I NEVER?!?
  • Spyro: ENOUGH!!!!...There won't be any of THAT here anymore! I'm not afraid to actually hurt anyone of you for fighting. If it means snapping you out of it, it's worth the harassing!
  • Donkey:...Yeah, what were we doing?
  • Icky: (Scoffs) Okay, THAT was really funny!
  • Galaxhar: "Seesh. Are you guys done scolding us? It's been a bad day for us. You had, NO idea, what we seen in the thoundson other tunnels back up there. We even saw a Diamond Dog couple...... Ugh, I didn't want to finish the sentence!"
  • Icky: Well, I guess Lord Cobra is gonna be pissed at you for getting yourself locked up like this. But we have some questions with you concerning this 'Dark Sprite' that you met.
  • Junjie:...You mean Darkly? Oh, she's not with us. She's probably hiding somewhere hopeless and terrified.
  • Rainbow Dash: Oh, she's hopeless and terrified alright! We're on the search for her, and don't think she can help you get that Rock, because we're gonna be on your trail if she even tries!
  • Makunga: HEY, she just came up to us randomly without any thought! She's useless to us because of her size! But you have to admit, that little lady was hot.
  • Tai Lung: Really? You HAD to say such a thing?
  • Makunga: What's so bad about a girl with transparent butterfly wings? THEY'RE ALL AS HOT AS LAVA!!!
  • Junjie: Okay, enough of this!
  • Applejack: We're gonna be watching over yall for the remainder of our stay until we put the Rainbow Rock in tighter security. If you even THINK about doin' anything smart, we'll be right on your tails!
  • Patrick: But Galaxhar doesn't have a tail. (Squidward face palms himself)
  • Junjie: HAH! It's times like this that I wish we still had those embarrassing videos of you losers! YOU'RE ALL SO AMUSING!!!
  • Brandy: Well, you don't! Get over it!
  • Shifu: Alright, who's gonna be watching over these guys until we get the job done?
  • Icky: "Well, we know who's NOT gonna do it! Fidget! Remember how badly he handled the Frog Stooages and Pain and Panic?"
  • Fidget: "Aw come on, they were giants compaired to me!"
  • Icky: "We know that, but this guy on devient art criticised us for trusting you for guarding the oylimian gate even when it already had comident guards who could kick their asses! Yeah, now that I think about it... Maybe there was a reason why Phil is on our team.... We were actselly, incompident before Phil?"
  • Po: "Actselly, I think of it more as, we were ALOT more dysfuntional before Phil came. We were more capable of bad mistakes before Phil."
  • Spyro: "But we're thankful we have improved expenationaly."
  • Icky: "We're still not god perfect, sometimes villains are just cheaters, but we're no longer AS bad as the Pre-phil era."
  • Phil: "Aw, shucks, I hardly ever get thanks like that from those other heroes. In fact, I only remembered Achilies as a thankful type..... BUT STILL THAT ASOGNA HEEL OF HIS!?"
  • Boss Wolf: "So, we're gonna need someone strong right? I can do it! I ain't afraid of a little tinkle bell rip-off! Wait, is she?"
  • Galaxhar: ".... Well, I did thought it was Peter Pan's pet magical human fly at some point. The resemblence was stupidly uncany!"
  • Boss Wolf: "Yeah! No way she can actselly be a problem!"
  • Rarity: "Well, that's very brave of you, espeically considering on how I once heared from Fancy Pants on how a darkness sprite can disembowl a minotaur within 17 seconds with a spoon! A SPOON!?"
  • Boss Wolf: "..... A darkness sprite did what now?"
  • Iago: THAT would be a problem!
  • Missing Link: You THINK?
  • B.O.B: Well, what do we do now? Our biggest Lodgers, Ginormica and Insectasaurus, can't fit in here, so they won't be of help to us.
  • Ginormica: (Her eye is seen out the window) Yeah, no kidding. (Insectasaurus' roar is heard) I know in that TV show I stared in enabled me to control my size thanks to the other alien substence thanks to Coverton, but I don't think even me and Insectasaurus can battle a dangerious sprite.
  • Po: Why don't I do it? Even a single sprite is no match for my bodacious fury! I've never known something of THAT size to beat me down--(Mantis smashes him to the ground)...Point taken!
  • Mantis: Yeah, it wouldn't be smart for YOU to stand up to a kickass sprite.
  • Viper: Still, we need to catch that sprite and fast.
  • Patrick: Why don't we just lure her with rump roast?
  • Squidward: No, no, that only works on the fairies of Timmy's world.
  • Patrick: Who's world?
  • Squidward: (Shrugs)
  • Patrick: Well, then if YOU'RE so smart, then how else can we catch that little winged lady?
  • Icky: "Pfft. Why not Junjie? She seems to be hopelessly fond of the little jerk."
  • Junjie: "She's a-WHHHAAAAAAAAAAT!?"
  • Galaxhar, Makunga, and Tai Lung laughed!
  • Makunga: "And I thought Cynder's romance with Ruber was bad, BUT THIS TAKES THE WHOLE CAKE!? (LAUGHS!)"
  • Icky: "Yyyyyeaahhh. Uh, the little chick's attacted to you. Honestly, she's almost like that little frog attacted to Nigel in Rio 2."
  • Tai Lung: Aw man.... Creepy on so many levels!
  • Junjie: Okay, I don't know WHY she came to me, but I think it was because she wanted to do her way with me when I was asleep. I KNEW something was up when I woke up right then. (Shivers in disgust)
  • Iago: Not that she's be big enough for it, anyway.
  • Icky: "Yeah, giant and small people relationships tend to end sucky. The only benifit is that one of the partners had the biggest you know what of the two! And with Junjie.... Well, at least he has a fan for his tiny ding dong!"
  • Junjie blushed!
  • Junjie: "(Squeaky voice) It's not tiny!"
  • Applejack: Well, I say it's a good idea. Let's use Junjie to lure that little sprite out here.
  • Junjie:...That is literally the dumbest thing I've ever heard! You're planning to use me as a CHICK MAGNET?!? (The villains laugh) Even a love-struck sprite like HER would never fall for that. She's a member of a dark race, so she's not THAT retarded! In fact, she may be trying to get the Rock as we speak, JUST to earn my affection.
  • Galaxhar: And the safety of her race.
  • Junjie: That too!
  • Gilda: You know damn well we won't let her do that!
  • Junjie: Then go get her, you slowpokes!
  • Gilda: WE SHALL!!! The biggest, strongest, and more experienced Lodgers stay here while the rest of us go search the place!
  • SpongeBob: Excuse me, I'm the leader, so I give the orders around here!...What she said! (Some of the Lodgers leave while the rest watch over the villains)
  • Mantis:...You know, you guys really suck at doing these kinds of things.
  • Tai Lung: Says the bug who got his frozen ass handed to him the first time we met, by ME! (Laughs)
  • Mantis: Hey, it's not the only time I've been frozen like that.
  • Po: Oh, don't remind me of that time!
  • Junjie:...(Scoffs) Pandahole!
  • Po: WHA-I-WHAT THE-JE-HU-WHAT?!?
  • Spyro: WHAT DID I TELL YOU?!? (They both stop, and he sighs) This is gonna be aggravating!

Chapter 5: The Rainbow Rock Is In Serious Danger

A hallway.

  • Darkly was sing opera.
  • Darkly: "Poisonous Love, (Hums the rest of the song)."
  • ???: Alright, we need to keep our eyes out for that Darkness Sprite! (Darkly flies into hiding, and sees the Shell Lodge Squad and the Ponies)
  • Darkly: (Scoffs) Big surprise! If it isn't Princess Twilight, Celestia's top protégé!
  • Twilight: Well, I'm glad I came along for this because I'm good at tracking down sprites!
  • Fluttershy: I hear the Light Sprites are just as cute as Breezies here.
  • Rainbow Dash: Yeah, and I can't imagine how many Darkness Sprites are left in Equestria. I read in Equestripedia that the ICUN Chart states they are Data Deficient, meaning they have NO idea of their population.
  • Darkly: (Hears those words angrily)
  • Rainbow Dash: Well, I can safely say they deserve to be extinct after what they've done to pony kind.
  • Fluttershy: I know they're evil, Rainbow Dash, but that sounds pretty hurtful. Maybe...maybe they need to see a brighter future.
  • Iago: HAH! I've never heard such ridiculous words in my life!
  • Icky: Usually, creatures created out of pure black magic are impossible to reform. Surely you must know that.
  • Fluttershy: Hey, I remember when me and the others had reformed the Boogeyman's Nightmare forces on the Moon. So that proves that there might be a brighter side to them.
  • Twilight: Well, they were made from harmless animals. These sprites are made of pure black magic.
  • Fluttershy: Still, it might be possible.
  • Alex: Why are we still talking about this when we have a Darkness Sprite to capture?
  • Darkly: (Angry, flies off)
  • Twilight: Wait a minute...Did you hear wings flapping?
  • Applejack: Not really.
  • Twilight: I think that Sprite was here. The sound came from...there, so let's go that way! (They follow the sound)
  • Darkly: (Flying from the group) I must get that Rock for my shnookum-wuckums, Junjie! Then we can be together forever! (Flies into a crack in the wall, and comes out into another hall, barely missing the Lodgers and ponies)...Whew! That was close! I--(Turns around to see she's close to the Rock's Room with Diamond Dog Guards guarding the Rainbow Rock, and a choir is heard as the Rock glitters in Darkly's eyes)...JACKPOT!!! But how do I get past those-
  • Fighting is heard, as Darkly sees Junjie's leopards fighting the guards!
  • Darkly: "Oh, I guess I wasn't the only one those doggies missed. Or maybe.... Junjie planned to be captured so the heroes would drop their guard! He's a genius! A hunky genius! (Laughs maniacly)."
  • Darkly came in and grabbed the stone as the Leopards finished the gaurds.
  • Leopard 1: "That sprite's on our side, right?"
  • Leopard 2: "Well, she did came to Junjie and offered to try and bribe the horse, so, I see no problem."
  • Darkly flies off holding notes as the Leopards follow!

Prison.

  • Galaxhar: ".... Hey.... I just realise something.... How come your leopards weren't with us while we were captured?"
  • Lord Shen: "What?!"
  • Lord Shen sees the lackage of Junjie's Leopards.
  • Po: "Oh, that is NOT good!"
  • Shifu: ".... Junjie, you planned to be captured, did you!?"
  • Junjie: "(Being coy) Whatever do you mean, Shifu?"
  • ???: "YA-A-TOE-HA!?"
  • The Guarding Lougers get zapped into unconiousness!
  • Darkly and the Leopards are seen.
  • Darkly: "Yeah, that's how we do it in Darkness Sprite town, bitch!?"
  • Junjie: "Finally. I used unforeseenable mishaps to my advantage! I cheated Karma!"
  • Galaxhar: "Well, mainly because of the Darkness Sprite."
  • The Leopards break off the gate!
  • Darkly: "Junjie, I brought you a gift!"
  • Darkly presents the stone!
  • Junjie grabs it, feeling the promise of it's power!
  • Junjie: "What unfortoldable beauty! HAHAHA! This will prove, once and for all, extremeisum wins in the end! Next stop, Canterlot!?"
  • Junjie laughs maniacly as he teleports the villains away!
  • Master Uranus comes in with the guards!
  • Master Uranus: "No! The capture was a diversion!"

Throwneroom.

  • Alpha: "That sneaky devil! He intentionally allowed himself to be captured while his scary leopards and the sprite snag our stone! But, how come we're not like our corrupted brethern yet?"
  • Master Uranus: "I blessed this place to keep us pure even when the stone is lost... But it will only last for days during it's absince. Maybe shorter."
  • Twilight: "I can't believe Junjie cheated us like this!"
  • Master Uranus: "It's nobody's fault! It is merely fate desiding to be cruel... There is still time to get back the stone, before unreverseable damage is made!"

Canterlot.

  • Galaxhar clones are seen marching as they come out of Galaxhar's giant robots!
  • Celestia, Luna, and Candence see this!
  • Luna: "This brings an unpleasent outlook for Equestia."
  • A roar is heard!
  • They also see a Iron Titan come torwords Canterlot castle, Junjie riding on it!
  • Candence: ".... Yeah...... That doesn't make it seem better."
  • The Titan stopped at the front gates.
  • Junjie got down, as his fellow villains appeared.
  • Celestia, Luna, and Candence teleported to meet Junjie.
  • Luna: "You have some adasity to show your face, Junjie."
  • Celestia: "Don't even fear Mang anymore and what he can do to you?"
  • Junjie: "Well...... Well at first, I was afraid... (Music starts to play) I was petrifived. I kept think that, I could never live, as what a leager should live, and I spent, oh so many nights thinking, how he did me wrong, (gets darker), and I grew strong, and I learned, how, (brings out the Rainbow Rock) to get along...."

(Junjie sings this as he is backuped singing by Darkly against Celestia, Luna, and Candence as he humiliates them through song and based on the lyrics, and even defeated the reinforcements of Shining Armor and the Guard)

Rio 2 Soundtrack - Track 10 - I Will Survive by Jemaine Clement and Kristin Chenoweth

Rio 2 Soundtrack - Track 10 - I Will Survive by Jemaine Clement and Kristin Chenoweth

  • Junjie has the Iron Titan pick up the defeated princesses.
  • Junjie: "Take them to Tartarus, my iron pet! And make sure they STAY there!"
  • the Iron Titan walks on.
  • Junjie: "Now, to face one more personal bully in my life.... After a few, make overs."
  • Junjie instructs Darkly to summon the now reserected Darkness Sprites, which have began darkifying everything!"

Meanwhile.

  • The Princesses struggled to get free from the Iron Titan's grip.
  • Luna: How in the heck did they find the Rainbow Rock of Great Magic?!?
  • Celestia: I don't know, but with it, I'm sure Junjie will finally be taken seriously.
  • Cadance: What'll we do?
  • Luna: We have to fight! (Tries blasting her way out of the Iron Titan's grip, but he is too indestructible) God, what is this thing made out of?
  • Celestia: It must be made of the same substance the Diamond Dogs that had the Rainbow Rock used. It's gonna be tough to get out of it's grasp....Well, I guess all we can do now is to hope for a miracle.
  • ???: Maybe not. (The Iron Titan is suddenly turned into wood, which allows the Alicorns to blast their way out of it's grasp. They fly to the ground to find that Discord has done the deed)
  • Discord: You girls need a hand?
  • Celestia: Well, it's great you showed up, Discord. Have you seen Twilight and her friends?
  • Discord: Oh, they were trying to stop the Villains from getting the Rock, but they cheated their way to get it. They're still on the case as we speak.
  • Cadance: Well, we have to do something. With that Rock in Junjie's hands, not even the Elements of Harmony will be able to stop him. We have to find a way to steal the Rock back.
  • Discord: Well, it might be tough since a swarm of black sprites came and disabled magic in all of Ponyville. I was able to make it here before they came. We won't be able to use our magic as long as those sprites are in the sky.
  • Celestia: Then we must find the Lodgers and Twilight. We'll need their help. (They all teleport away)

Bow-Wow City

  • Twilight: (Everyone runs out of the holes and reaches the surface) This is bad, everyone! With that Rock, even our Elements of Harmony powers won't be able to stop Junjie. He has the power to control various forms of magic now!
  • Rainbow Dash: Uh...guys? Why is there a black cloud over Canterlot? (They see a Sprite swarm over Canterlot)
  • Twilight: Oh, no! The Darkness Sprites have been brought back!
  • Pinkie: Those are Sprites? I thought it was a thundercloud.
  • Twilight: I can't imagine that Celestia, Luna, and Cadance are having a bad time over there.
  • ???: We're okay, my faithful student! (Celestia, Luna, Cadance, and Discord teleport to them)
  • Master Uranus: (He and the Pound-Puppy look-alikes bow to them) Princess Celestia, the Rainbow Rock has been stolen.
  • Celestia: We already know, Master Uranus. They tried to take us to Tartarus until Discord came and saved us.
  • Master Uranus: Wait, Discord? He's free?
  • Discord: (Turns into a bird) Free as a bird!
  • Master Uranus: But why--?
  • Twilight: Long story short, Celestia had us reform him a long time ago. It took him a while to get a better heart after being set up by Lord Tirek.
  • Master Uranus:...Well, okay, but why would you want to reform Discord, your majesty?
  • Celestia: Because...well...I guess it was because of his parents that I had to do it.
  • Twilight: Really? Why didn't you say anything before?
  • Celestia: I might have forgotten to say that. Forgive me for that.
  • Twilight:...Well, okay.
  • Discord: Apparently, Junjie had brought those Darkness Sprites to Canterlot and Ponyville, and their presence is interfering with our magic. We won't be able to use our powers when we're in Ponyville or Canterlot.
  • Luna: It's probably a second restraint to keep us from stopping him.
  • Icky: "So he disabled magic. Big whoop. We still have other ways to stop him. Besides, Jun-butt is never gonna earn the ponies' loyalty!"
  • Shifu: "But he will not offer forgiveness for defyence!"
  • Maud Pie: "Espeically when he can also seasons and the elements! That includes weather! He'll punish resistence with a super storm of his choosen, or place them in a drout, or even a new ice age, or something even more catistrofic."
  • Spongebob: "What can be worse then that?"
  • Maud Pie: ".... He could turn the dead against us."
  • Icky: "HE CAN BRING THE DEAD TO LIFE!?! Well, again, he did brought back the Sprites, but what is that stone capable of!?"
  • Maud Pie: "Let's just say, it's like a universeal remote, for all living things."
  • Icky: ".... Well, fuck...."
  • Patrick: "Wow... This is almost as bad as when Xerxes had that magical diamond thing back in season 1."
  • Icky: "Yeah, but that ended when the spirit inside..... Revolted..... When Xerxes tried to.... Hurt Magnum..... Patrick, your locked up genius came through for us!"
  • Patrick covers his crotch!
  • Patrick: "WHERE!?"
  • Icky: "Hey Maud, I once heard in a documentary that that rock was made of the spirits of fallen Alicorns, is that true?"
  • Maud Pie: "Yes.... But trouble is, unlike this spirit from your diamond, they, espeically the spirit of the original Alicorn of magic, are stuck in a deep sleep. Junjie would have to do alot atrosities to Alicorns or those they swore to protect for them to be awaken..."
  • Celestia: "Unfortunately, his attacks on us were brief, so it didn't woke them."
  • Luna: "And the sprites would only harm under Junjie's command."
  • Twilight poundered.
  • Twilight: "Guys.... It may be risky, but it's garrentied to work."

Chapter 6: Junjie Vs. Mang.... And Then Twilight

Canterlot.

  • Canterlot is being covered in monuments of Junjie defeating The Princesses, and Shifu.
  • Shining Armor is seen chained.
  • Junjie laughed with his fellow villains!
  • Junjie: "As I said friends! Extremeisum always wins in the end! Mang WILL finally respect me!"
  • Shining Armor: "Don't.... Count on it, you monster! The High Council will never-"
  • Junjie: "SHUT UP!?"
  • Junjie zaps Shining, and turns him into an old staillian with a long beard and a fading mane and tail color.
  • Junjie: "You need your rest, OLD MAN!"
  • Shining coughed.
  • Shining Armor: "You won't get away with, (weeses), this!"
  • Junjie: "Hello? I single handedly congured Equestia AND destroyed it as a paradise, and done it WAY better then that stupid, incompident Mang!?"
  • Galaxhar: "Isn't that his ship?"
  • A Cobra like vessel lands.
  • Cobra and Chrysalis came out!
  • Cobra: "JUNNNNNNJIIIIIEEEEE?! YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW EMBARRISING THIS IS?! YOU ATTACKED EQUESTIA, WITHOUT MY PRIOR APPROVEAL!? WHY I OUGHTA-"
  • Junjie: "Go ahead you stupid fool! Use your magic! I dare you!"
  • Tai Lung, Galaxhar, and Makunga ran off to hide somewhere, as Junjie's leopards went to stay clear!
  • Cobra: "Well, GET READY FOR PAIN, JUNJIE!?"
  • Junjie stayed calm.
  • Chrysalis: "Mang, why is he so calm?"
  • Cobra: "Silence woman! I need to zap him good!"
  • Chrysalis noticed the Darkness Sprites and Darkly Chell chanting.
  • Chrysalis: "MANG, WAIT! IT'S A TRA-"
  • But it was too late, Mang's magic did nothing.
  • Cobra: "... Did my magic, farted on me?"
  • Junjie: "Actselly, my sprites disabled it."
  • Cobra: "......... I am gonna be in a serious amount of pain, am I?"
  • Junjie: Yep! (Kung Fu Kicks towards him and it cuts to black)
  • Cobra: OW, OWCH, OWIE!!! OW!!! OOF! OW! OUCH! OH, THAT SMARTS--OW!!! (He is suddenly seen beaten up)...ARE YOU MAD, JUNJIE?!?
  • Junjie: Oh, I'm mad, alright. You see how good I've done with my plan? I did it WAY better than you EVER would! If YOU were to try and get this thing, you'd fall harder than a meteorite!
  • Cobra: THEN WHY THE HELL DIDN'T YOU TELL ME ABOUT THIS ROCK IF YOU KNEW IT HAD SUCH AMAZING POWERS?!? I would've had the rock in my grasp in a second!
  • Junjie: 2 reasons: 1. The security was impervious to your obvious invasions, not to mention the Lodgers would've stopped you in a second. 2. YOU SUCK!!!
  • Cobra: I swear to you, Junjie, if I get my hands on you, I'll screw you up so goddamn hard!
  • Junjie: That'll be the day. Now, ladies, take them away! (The leopards grab Cobra and Chrysalis, and tie them up together) I'll be sure to expect those heroes to arrive, and once I defeat them, you'll regret EVER doubting me and calling me a second-rate loser!
  • Cobra: HEY, in my defense, in every attempt you make, you had failed, and you winded up getting bad attention to me from the High Council! SERIOUSLY, YOU MAKE THE VILLAIN LEAGUE A LAUGHING STOCK!!
  • Junjie: Those were nothing but cases of bad luck, and you know it! But this time, it's gonna be different. I have the power to control an infinite amount of magic powers. I could even use it to take away your mutation, and even take away your girlfriend's power, and make her weaker than the Egyptian Pyramids!
  • Chrysalis: Big deal, I love Coby, I'll gain more power that way!
  • Junjie: HAH! I have the power to control minds, too! I'll make this snakehole loathe you!
  • Cobra: WHAT THE F*** DID YOU JUST CALL ME?!?
  • Junjie: Snake-HOLE!!!
  • Cobra: HOW DARE YOU USE THAT LANGUAGE AT ME?!?
  • Junjie: What's that, snakehole?
  • Cobra: Say it again!
  • Junjie: You want me to?
  • Cobra: I dare you!
  • Junjie: Snakehole!
  • Chrysalis: (Scoffs)
  • Junjie: THAT GOES FOR YOU, TOO, CHANGELINGHOLE!!!
  • Chrysalis: (Eye twitches) WHY YOU LITTLE ORANGE DOG!!!
  • Junjie: (Chuckles) This is gonna be FUN! (Chuckles) Now if you'll excuse me, I have some heroes to disintegrate! (Leaves)
  • Cobra:...Snakehole! WHERE THE HELL DID HE LEARN SUCH A WORD?!?

Canterlot Outskirts

  • Canterlot is seen at it's darkest, surrounded by Galaxhar clones and Darkness Sprites.
  • Celestia:...This is terrible.
  • Sparx: Ya' think?
  • Spyro: So how are we gonna do this plan Twilight came up with? Junjie's sure to be expecting us.
  • Twilight: Trust me, it will work. If the Diamond of the Ancients can fight back from control through the abuse to it by it's controller, then I'm sure the same reaction to the Rainbow Rock and Junjie will work the same way. All we have to do is to...get Junjie to severely attack me!
  • Everyone: WHAT?!?
  • Rainbow Dash: TWILIGHT, ARE YOU NUTS?!? YOU'RE SERIOUSLY GOING TO POSSIBLY SACRIFICE YOURSELF TO SAVE US?!?
  • Twilight: Sorry, Rainbow Dash, but I'm the only one who can fix this properly. Cadance, despite being a non-immortal Alicorn like me, can't be the one to make the sacrifice. She's too important to risk. And don't worry if I wind up dead. Remember when we said that the Rainbow Rock was made with the souls of the Alicorns of long ago?
  • Maud Pie: You mean like the Alicorn of Magic, Mana Magic?
  • Celestia: Oh, she's actually my great-great-aunt.
  • Maud Pie: Well, I have heard that she can heal the mortally wounded even at the point of dying.
  • Twilight: Yes, Mana is sure to still be inside the Rock somewhere. If I show a great sacrifice and get myself wounded severely, the Rainbow Rock will turn against Junjie, and have me healed before I can die. I know it sounds crazy, but we have to do it.
  • Celestia:...Well...In that case, I wish you luck. (Both hug)
  • Twilight: Thank you, Princess!
  • Cadance: Well, I hope you know what you're doing, Twilight!
  • Icky: "Now, allow us to give those guards someone to play with!"
  • 10 Galaxhar clones are seen in a patrol!
  • A trumpet plays!
  • Galaxhar clones: "Huh?"
  • The Lougers and the ponies charge!
  • Heroes: "CHARGE!"
  • Galaxhar clones: "WHAT THE!?"
  • Bowling Pin Sound!
  • The heroes battle the clones as Twilight sneaks in!
  • The Darkness Sprites charge in!
  • ???: "HOLD IT, YOU DARKEN FREAKS?!"
  • Darkness Sprite 1: "EEP! OH NO! NOT THEM!?"
  • Celestia: Well, it's about time THEY sensed something! (The Light Sprites arrive in the nick of time)
  • Fluttershy: Aww!
  • Darkness Sprite #2: CRY AND WET YOURSELVES LIKE BABIES AND RUN!!!
  • Darkness Sprite #3: (Slaps DS #2) THERE WILL BE NO PUSSINESS IN THIS ARMY! We must FIGHT! (The Dark and Light Sprites get into a battle with each other)
  • Twilight: (Hidden in the alleys of Canterlot, sees the castle a few feet away)...Okay, Twilight, how are you gonna get through this without magic or being seen?
  • ???: Maybe I can be of help, your highness! (Flash Sentry appears)
  • Twilight: FLASH?!? What're you doing here?
  • Flash: Well, long story short, I was visiting my parents and we took a short vacation here, and BOOM, we get trapped in this whole situation together. I saw you and your group fighting, and I saw you head over here, so I thought I'd help you out.
  • Twilight:...Well...okay. You have any ideas on how to get me into the castle? The Darkness Sprites are keeping me from using magic, and I can't fly without being spotted.
  • Flash Sentry: Don't worry, I have a plan...

Later...

  • Twilight: Are you sure this will work, Flash?
  • Flash: (Has made a slingshot from the walls of the two buildings and a large banner, ready to launch the two of them towards the entrance of the castle) I did it all the time when I was a filly, and somehow, I went through it without a scratch. It was a lot of fun, and it actually helped me get to school a lot faster.
  • Twilight: (Laughs) Seriously?
  • Flash: Yeah, isn't child naïveté crazy when you get older?
  • Twilight: Yeah!
  • Flash: Alright, we lift our legs off the ground on 3! 1...2...3! (They let their legs off the ground, and they are launched straight towards the castle entrance)
  • Flash/Twilight: AAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!! (They bash right into the castle entrances' stairway) OOF!
  • Flash: DAMN, I forgotten how awesome that was!
  • Twilight: You are REALLY full of surprises, Flash!
  • Flash: I am. Now let's go!
  • ???: Not so fast, jackponies! (Darkly Chell appears in their path) You're not going near Junjie AT ALL!!
  • Flash:...Pfft, a sprite? Really? Just one simple sprite can deter us? HAH! You're the size of a squirrel! What can YOU do to us? (Darkly zips up to him, and smashes him on the ground back and forth) OOF, OW, OWCH, AYE, OW, WHAT THE FU--, OW, OOF, DOOMPH!!! (Lies on the ground disorientated)...(Slurred) My mom was REALLY good at embroidering even without fingers! (Lies down unconscious)
  • Twilight: FLASH!!!
  • Darkly: I ain't gonna let you touch my honey OR that Rock! I'm gonna hit you so hard, your teeth will be stuck in your ponytail!
  • Twilight: Wait, I don't have a ponytail--OH, YOU DIRTY LITTLE MIDGET!!!
  • Darkly: "YA-ATO-HOE?!"
  • Darkly brought out a giant axe!
  • Twilight: "Ahh!"
  • Twilight flies around being chased by Darkly!
  • Twilight: "Goo, if only I had like, a jar or something!" (She flies around the castle while being chased by Darkly)
  • Darkly: YOU CAN FLY, BUT YOU CAN'T HIDE, TWILIGHT!!!
  • Twilight: I gotta get rid of her!...Hmm...I got it! (Stops) HEY, JUNJIE'S TAKING A SHOWER!!!
  • Darkly: REALLY?!? (Flies away)
  • Twilight: Sucker! (Flies into the entrance with Flash, who recovered almost unrealisticly quick)

Castle Throne Room

  • Junjie: DO IT!!!
  • Cobra: There is NO way I'm making out with Chrysalis in front of you!
  • Junjie: Oh, really? (Uses the Rock to make both of them kiss and hug each other while laying on the floor while Junjie was laughing) I-(Laughs)-I, Oh, God! (Laughs) I CAN'T BREATHE--(Makes them stop out of too much laughter, and while they are embarrassed, he calms down)...Now let's do that again!
  • Chrysalis: FOR GOD'S SAKE, HOW MUCH LONGER ARE YOU GONNA BE TORTURING US LIKE THIS?!?
  • Cobra: IT'S SO EMBARRASSING!
  • Junjie: Oh, and I'm sure YouTube would agree!
  • Cobra: You...YOU UPLOADED IT ALL ON YOUTUBE?!?
  • Junjie: You bet your ass I did! And guess what? 1,000 views! (Laughs) You're a mean one, Mr. Junjie! (Laughs)
  • Chrysalis: Okay, that's a little too far on evil, even for you.
  • Junjie: It's still evil, bitch! I'M MUCH BETTER THAN YOU IN EVERY WAY! And you'll see when I kick those Shell Lodgers' butts! They won't even lay a single finger on me!
  • ???: HEY, JUNJIE! (Twilight and Flash arrive) I'm calling you out!
  • Junjie: Ah, Twilight Sparkle and your little boyfriend, Flash Sentry! You've come to spoil the party! I was just giving these 2 bozzoes their just desserts!
  • Flash: (Smells the air) Blech, I can see that! These two smell like sweat!
  • Chrysalis: PLEASE don't have Hermes add this to the Lodgers' embarrassing videos!
  • Twilight: Wow, Junjie, that's a bit too far!
  • Junjie: Where's your little friends, dipstick? Did my power scare them off?
  • Twilight: This is between you and me, Junjie! Mono-a-mono!
  • Junjie: (Scoffs) Are you serious? Is she serious? You rush in here like you can take ME? I've disabled your magic powers with the Darkness Sprites! And on top of that, wasn't Darkly supposed to have been guarding the entrance?
  • Darkly's Voice: (Heard in the bathroom) HEY, JUNJIE'S NOT TAKING A SHOWER!!!
  • Junjie:...You CANNOT be serious!
  • Flash: (Scoffs) She's seriously in love with you?
  • Junjie: Don't ask! PLEASE!
  • Galaxhar, Tai Lung, and Makunga appeared!
  • Galaxhar: "You don't actselly think your gonna get in the way of leage conquest without a fight from us, are you?"
  • Junjie's Leopards appear as well.
  • Shining Armor as an old Staillain: "Twilight, no! It's too dangerious alone!"
  • Twilight: SHINING ARMOR?!? WHAT THE HELL DID JUNJIE DO TO YOU?!?
  • Junjie: I made him older than Celestia!
  • Twilight: Oh, YOU ARE GOING DOWN, FOXHOLE!!!
  • Cobra: HAH! You just got burned, bitch!
  • Junjie: (Magically makes Cobra stick his finger up his nose)
  • Chrysalis: Well, at least we know where he learned that word!
  • Junjie: Fine, Twilight! If it's a fight you want, then it's a fight you've GOT! (Magically surrounds the entire throne room with a purple field, which it's light is seen in the rest of Canterlot) Are you ready to have your horse's ass handed to you?
  • Twilight: I could ask the same thing to you, foxhole!
  • Junjie: STOP CALLING ME THAT!!! Besides, I don't need to fight you. I can control your powers. Especially the Elemental Powers you gained. In theory, I CAN CONTROL YOU AND YOUR FRIENDS! (Uses the Rock to cause pain in her chest)
  • Twilight: AAHHHRRRGGGHHH!!! MY HEAD IS ON FIRE!!!

Canterlot Town

  • Applejack: (She and the other Mane 6 are suffering the same pain) AHHHRRRGGGHHH!!!!
  • Rainbow Dash: (Drops to the ground in pain) UUHHHRRRGGHH!
  • Celestia: Uh-oh! Junjie's tapping into the Elements of Harmony's powers. He's using it to hurt the Mane 6!
  • Pinkie: UUHHHRRRGGGHHH!!!
  • Fluttershy: (Crying in pain) AAHHRRRGGGHHH!! OOWW!!! OOW!!! (Sobs)
  • Discord: I'll take care of this! (Flies off to Canterlot, but is stopped by the purple force field barricading the room) CRAP!
  • Junjie: YOU STAY OUT OF THIS, TRAITOROUS ABOMINATION!!! (Uses the rock to teleport him away) None of his annoyance will be in this fight!
  • Twilight: This isn't much of a fight--GRRAARRRGGHH!!! You're just torturing us!
  • Junjie: Well, DUH! I've got unlimited power!
  • Twilight: Then why don't you just--AARRGGHHH!!! Fight me with basic magic?
  • Junjie: Oh, I'm not falling for THAT clever trick!
  • Twilight: Are you a coward, Junjie? Like you always were--AAARRRRRRGGGHHH!!!
  • Junjie:...You know, that's actually not a bad idea. (Releases the pain spell, freeing Twilight and her friends) We fight with basic magic skills. And to be more specific, whatever damn spells you're capable of! That means we both fight with evenly matched powers!
  • Twilight: Right! No stronger powers. Whoever loses gets to do whatever he wants to do!
  • Junjie: You're on, ass! (Magically appears as a red-eyed version of Twilight with no cutie mark) Put up your horn!
  • Twilight: (Gulps)...Well, here we go! (The two stand their ground against each other)
  • Flash: "Go get him Twily! You got this in the-"
  • Galaxhar, Tai Lung, and Makunga pounce on Flash!
  • Twilight: (Blasts a magic laser at Junjie, but Junjie jumps accurately over her, and Kung Fu kicks her to a wall) OOF!
  • Junjie: Too bad the rules don't account for my KUNG FUCKING FU!!!
  • Twilight: Well, joke's on you, I have spells that can be a match for even your precious moves! But I still know a thing or two in fighting. (Takes out her Keyblade) I can't believe I forgot about this thing for years. To be fair, it's both because of the fact I don't have MUCH need for it, and that it seems to be something only when Tman is writing the script. (Blows the dust and webs off of it, and it gets shinier) Not to mention I have a Keyblade, and you don't!
  • Junjie: (Magically makes his own similar Keyblade) NOW I do!
  • Twilight:...Meep! (Junjie jumps towards Twilight, and the two duel against each other, and even use their magic powers against each other, all while Flash and Shining Armor are watching in nervousness)
  • Darkly: "KICK HER BUTT, JUNJIE MY LOVE!?"
  • Twilight: You think this will make you taken seriously? You've already made the High Council angry at the Villain League like you've always done before.
  • Junjie: Maybe, but look how powerful I've become! The Villain League will HAVE to become extremists again now that they know that I've done much better than ever before. Even YOU can't stop me!

Canterlot Town

  • Applejack: Discord, what's happening in there?
  • Discord: Twilight is confronting Junjie! I don't know what's going on, but Junjie's put up a force field around the throne room to keep anyone from going in.
  • Private: What'll we do?
  • SpongeBob: We've gotta get over there and see if Twilight needs our help.
  • Discord: I don't think Junjie will allow that. He'll have us teleported away.
  • Celestia: Well, I think we have no choice. The Galaxhar clones are beaten, and the Light Sprites are taking care of the Darkness Sprites. We'll have to find a place where we can watch the fight without being detected.
  • Luna: And with the Darkness Sprites distracted, there might be a chance we can use our magic.
  • Celestia: Well, let's see. (Tries using her magic, but after getting painful feelings, she is able to teleport the group to a place on the mountain where they can see the fight between Junjie and Twilight)...Owch!
  • Luna: Sister, are you okay?
  • Celestia: I'm fine. My head just hurts a bit.
  • Luna: Well, I guess we should hold off on the magic until the Darkness Sprites are taken care of to be safe.
  • Skipper: There's Junjie and Twilight! (They see Junjie and Twilight fighting)
  • Patrick: Why does Junjie look like Twilight?
  • Discord: I don't know, but I think they might be evenly matched. And if I know anything about Keyblade fights, she's losing big time.
  • Shifu: Let's see how this plays out.

Back to the fight.

  • Junjie: "Oh, please! This isn't the first time I weilded one of these over-sized keys! I did fought in the Second "False First" Cartoonian war!"
  • Cobra: "ON THE HIGH COUNCIL'S SIDE!?"
  • Junjie: "BEGRUDINGLY, MIND YOU! IT WASN'T MY FAULT OOGWAY HAD MORE LEGIT POWER, THEN YOU WOULD'VE DREAMED TO HAVE!?"
  • Cobra: "OH YOU ARE SO LUCKY MIRAGE WOULD NEVER LET ME KICK YOU OUT EVEN WHEN YOU JUST ASSULTED ME AWHILE BACK AND EMBARRISED YOUR SUPERIORS ONLINE?! Blasted woman's too favering on you."
  • Junjie: "DO I HAVE TO TURN YOU INTO AN OLD MAN TOO LIKE SHINING IDIOT?!"
  • Twilight: How DARE you say that about my brother?!? (Blasts him to the ground with her powers, and she points her Keyblade at him) Alright, Junjie! Your time is up!
  • Junjie: Oh, that's what YOU think! (Snatches her Keyblade, and wields both his and her Keyblades against her) Let's see you scurry out of THIS! (Suddenly, the Rock glows in black energy without Junjie noticing) (Junjie attacks, but Twilight puts up a force field to protect herself)...Pfft, what a cheap trick! (Uses telekinesis to levitate Twilight off the ground, and smashes her into the purple barricading field, disabling her shield)
  • Twilight: Ouch!
  • Junjie: (Runs towards Twilight, and to everyone's surprise, he stabs her with her Keyblade)...I WIN! (Cackles, but then the Rainbow Rock, still glowing black, starts to get stronger, and Junjie finally notices as the Rock blasts in rainbow lights, and an Alicorn figure is seen) What the hell?!?
  • Alicorn Figure: INSOLENT FOOL! (Junjie is transformed back into his normal self) YOU HAVE BROUGHT MAJOR HARM TO AN ALICORN PRINCESS!! (Twilight, while severely wounded and bleeding, sees that her plan has worked)
  • Junjie: Who the hell are you?!?
  • Alicorn Figure: I am Mana Magic, the Alicorn of Magic, and manifestation of the Rainbow Rock! You attempted to murder an Alicorn Princess, and have abused the power of the Rainbow Rock! Now, you must be punished greatly for it!
  • Junjie: Oh, what's this supposed to be, Twilight? Is this another one of your little magic tricks? Is this supposed to intimidate me? Huh? HUH? (Laughs)
  • Mana Magic: YOU DARE TO INSULT MY PRESENCE?!? (Thunder is heard)
  • Junjie: Uh...how are you doing this?
  • Twilight: Hey, I'm wounded--(Coughs blood) I can't use any magic!...I...(Slowly starts dying)
  • Junjie:...(Gulps) I...I-I-I-I-I-I--
  • Mana Magic: SILENCE!!! YOU SHALL PAY DEARLY FOR THE BLOOD YOU SPILT FROM THIS MIGHTY ALICORN!
  • Junjie: No, please, I was just kidding! With embarrassing a few villains, wasn't that HILARIOUS?
  • Mana Magic: I WILL NOT TAKE ANY EXCUSES FROM YOU, SADIST! YOU MUST PAY, AND YOU WILL PAY AS OF RIGHT NOW! (Glows in rainbow magic, and starts to release a magic shockwave similar to a Sonic Rainboom, destroying all the Darkness Sprites, bringing Shining Armor back to his proper age, and healing Twilight's wounds after she is seconds until death, and Junjie is surrounded by rainbow swirls)
  • Junjie: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! (Starts to shrink, and turns into the size of a baby fox, and gets a squeaky voice)...WHAT THE HELL?!?
  • Mana Magic: You shall remain this way until a proper punishment is given! You shall not touch the Rainbow Rock again, or I won't hesitate to punish you further!
  • Junjie: (Looks at an angry Cobra and Chrysalis) No! PLEASE! I'LL DO ANYTHING! I'LL CLEAN UP CANTERLOT, I'LL TURN MYSELF IN, I'LL DO COMMUNITY SERVICE, JUST PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME TO SUFFER!!!
  • Mana Magic: I have nothing further to say to you! My decision is made, and it shall STAY that way! (Goes back into the rock)
  • Junjie:...(Cobra looks at him angrily)...(Chuckles) Wasn't that relaxing how I made you kiss Chrysalis? Don't you two have a thing going? Why else do I clean the slime out of your room?
  • Chrysalis: That's disgusting! That was just from wet dreams!
  • Junjie: Oh...(Chuckles)...Still, with the videos, and the sticking your finger up your nose thing? Wasn't that silly?
  • Darkly Chell (Who survived thanks to the dumb luck of somehow hiding behind a magic proof sheild): "Ohhhh..... At least, there's no size conflicts."
  • Junjie screams like a girl and ran for it!
  • Tai Lung, Makunga, Galaxhar, and Junjie's leopards stood agape.
  • Galaxhar: "..... Let's leave while we still can."
  • The trio attempted to leave, but was suddenly intersceted by Shining Armor, Flash, the rest of the guards, and our heroes.
  • Makunga: ".... Uh oh..... Uh......... This isn't gonna result in our butts being kicked, is it? Cause, I would rather NOT today, so-" (A beating-up montage is seen)

Chapter 7: Junjie Gets Humiliated Again

Later...

  • Cobra: For once, we thank you for saving us from this crazy foxhole!
  • Chrysalis: (Scoffs) It's just funny when you say it!
  • Cobra: But don't think we won't give you any favors. We're still enemies here. I mean, come on, not meaning to sound ungratful here, but we have standerds in the leage! We need to give this little douche a proper punishment!
  • Junjie: I'LL MAKE YOU PAY FOR THIS, SHELL LOSERS!!!
  • SpongeBob: It's our pleasure. Now go ahead and leave before we get you.
  • Cobra:.... Well, at least they acknowledged it. (Immediately teleports himself and the villains away)
  • Darkly Chell sees this while hiding.
  • Darkly Chell: "Oh, poo......"
  • Darkly flew away.
  • Darkly: "(Sounding sad) Poisonious Love....."

Eventally.

  • Darkly sat on a lonely flower, sheding tears.
  • Darkly: "Never has a love ended so tragicly, then a love, between a fox.... And a Darkness Sprite....... I'LL NEVER LOVE AGAIN!?"
  • The background sound of "Poisonious Love" is heard as Darkly incrises in crying!
  • As the music plays, she sees a venus-fly-trap like creature.
  • Darkly: "..... It's not worth it anymore."
  • Darkly sadly and slowly flies to the creature.
  • Darkly: "Time to embrace the cold embrace of death..... Via a Sprite-Snapper."
  • She gets inside a Sprite-Snapper's mouth.
  • Darkly: "If I can't have Junjie..... Then ado.... Cold-hearted universe."
  • Darkly holds a note!
  • Darkly: "From our Poisionious, L-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-v-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e......"
  • Darkly was about to trip a trigger to the plant.
  • ???: Whoa there, Chell!
  • Darkly: Wha--who said that? (Suddenly a bright light above her is seen) AHH!!! (Flies away before the plant can chomp her) LEAVE ME ALONE!!! (Suddenly, the light consumes her, and she gets knocked out and is glowing in yellow energy, and some Rainbow Dogs take her with them while holding the Rainbow Rock)

Darkly's Subconscious

  • Darkly:...Hello?...Uh...is anyone there?
  • ???: I'm right here, Darkly. (Mana Magic appears, along with Celestia and Luna)
  • Darkly: Uh...(Gulps) Please don't tell me that you're here to send me to prison!
  • Celestia: Actually, no. We sent some Rainbow Dogs to find you, and we sensed that you were trying to kill yourself.
  • Luna: In fact, when we first met you, we sensed a balance between light and dark. You're one of the last of the Darkness Sprites, but your crush on Junjie has been starting to clear away some of it all the way into 50%.
  • Mana Magic: One of my philosophies is that when an unexpected feeling oozes into the darkest heart, including love, it can make strong changes. Right now, your heart is 50% dark, and 50% light.
  • Darkly: So what? You Alicorns don't care for my race, and created the Light Sprites to wipe us out.
  • Celestia: Don't lose hope, Darkly. There is still a non-violent way to make peace. Why fight for your lives? You know what they say, if you can't beat them, join them.
  • Darkly:...Are you serious? You want me to JOIN the Light Sprites?
  • Luna: Not just you, but the rest of your race.
  • Darkly: (Laughs) And what makes you think that they're willing to join?
  • Celestia: Because they are starting to think the same way.
  • Mana Magic: You see, when your race started depleting, all the Darkness Sprite started getting surprising ideas to repopulate. They started getting into hundreds of love triangles. That means that your ENTIRE race have been feeling love all at the same time.
  • Darkly: You expect me to believe that my own race has been going on a loving frenzy, and erased half of the darkness in their hearts? HAH! There's no way in hell that I'll believe-- (Suddenly magic holograms of other members of her race are revealed to have been falling in love with other genders. Females fall in love with males, males fall in love with females, and some have been seen having children. They are even seen dropping weapons giving up fighting, and some are converted into Light Sprites)...What's this?
  • Mana Magic: These are what happened to the rest of your race. The love they have been feeling throughout the years have been leading them into having their own families, and thus, they can't risk losing them, so they gave up the fight for survival and became one of the 'enemy'. They became Light Sprites.
  • Celestia: You see, Darkly, love is considered by some members of your species, as well as others, to be the best medicine. Love takes the most corrupt of hearts, and clears them away into becoming caring hearts. Love means that you have to make decisions in life, and once your mind is made up, there's no going back. You're life is changed forever. That's what have happened to the rest of your race. Only 99.7% of them remain unchanged, and most of them have already fallen in love or had kids.
  • Darkly: But my family! They swore to never let love take them over since my parents' divorce. They would never--(A magic hologram of her parents are seen marrying other sprites. Her mother has some babies, and her father is starting to get seduced in mating)...This...this is crazy! CRAZY! It's all a lie!
  • Mana Magic: It's all true, Chell! With only 99.7% of your dark race giving up the fight for the sake of starting a new life over, perhaps it's time you did the same.
  • Darkly: But...but I lost the person I loved.
  • Mana Magic: I don't think that fox would've made a perfect mate anyway. Trust me! But you'll find someone eventually. Besides, there aren't many single males of your dark race left. So why fall in love with a Darkness Sprite when you can find a mate in a race of billions of Light Sprites? The males in that race are known to seduce even the most resistant of females. In fact, over 856 Darkness Sprites have fallen in love with Light Sprites and have given up being dark for the sake of being with them.
  • Darkly: Are you serious?
  • Mana Magic: Absolutely. So why beat them when you can join them?
  • Darkly:...I don't know, it seems rather taboo for me.
  • Luna: You might find being a Light Sprite is easier than being a Darkness Sprite. Think about it for a second.
  • Darkly:...(Sighs)...Well, okay. If it means getting what I desired in the past few days, then it's worth the risk!
  • Celestia: It worked, Great-Great Aunt Mana!
  • Mana Magic: Indeed. Now when you wake up, Darkly, you will be given a new name, a new life, and you will become a Light Sprite.
  • Darkly: Can I ask for one favor, then?
  • Mana Magic: Name it.
  • Darkly:...Can I see Junjie again? I want to say goodbye before I start a new life over.
  • Mana Magic: As you wish. But be aware that nobody else will see you except Junjie. You will appear as a hallucination.
  • Darkly: Thank you. I'm just taken back by the fact that you have decided to care for my race after all they did to you.
  • Luna: It is our pleasure.
  • Mana Magic: Now I shall send you to where you desire to go. (Magically makes Darkly deteriorate)

Villains Act HQ

  • Cobra: (The villains are on a laptop) THANK GOD we have that damn video deleted! Now we shall see what Mirage has to say to this little foxhole after he DARED to disrespect a superior!
  • Junjie: (Still small and inside a small cage) LET ME GO!!! LET ME GO, DAMMIT!!!
  • Cobra: SHUT UP YOU TINY FOXHOLE!!!
  • Junjie: AARRRGGGHHH!!! TOO LOUD!! MY EARS ARE BURNING!!!

Villain League Briefing Room

  • Mirage: (Junjie's cage is sitting on a table) THIS IS A GREAT OUTRAGE, JUNJIE!!! Not only did you go out without consent by Cobra or me, but you also tortured Cobra, blackmailed him, AND got the High Council to charge us for property damage, reckless endangerment, AND for assaulting, of all things, AN ALICORN PRINCESS!!! YOU BIG INCOMPETENT FOOL!!!
  • Junjie: Now, now, Mirage, let's not be hasty about this!
  • Mirage: HASTY?!? YOU'VE BEEN GETTING US SENTENCED WITH FAR TOO MANY PUNISHMENTS!!! OUR REPUTATION IS GETTING RUINED BECAUSE OF YOU!! EVERYBODY IS LAUGHING AT US AND MOCKING US ALL BECAUSE OF YOUR LOUSY VIDEO!!! YOU BLACKMAILED COBRA AND CHRYSALIS, AND YOU LEAKED THEIR DEEPEST SECRET WITH IT!!!
  • Chrysalis: YEAH!
  • Jafar: YOU ARE A FOOL!!!
  • Junjie: OKAY, ENOUGH WITH THE DAMN SCREAMING, THIS PLACE IS ECHOING THE LOUD NOISE INTO MY SENSITIVE SMALL EARS!!! GOD!!!
  • Zira: GOOD! BECAUSE YOU DESERVE IT AFTER YOU LEFT THE BADDEST TASTE IN OUR MOUTHS!!!
  • Nuka: YEAH, IT TASTES WORSE THAN TERMITES!! (Gnaws on himself)
  • Mirage: And let's not forget his accomplices! Makunga, Tai Lung, and Galaxhar!
  • Galaxhar: (They are seen gagged and tied up to chairs) MMMPPHHH!!!
  • Mirage: You two are as much of a disgrace as Junjie is for accompanying him. You left without consent as well! Not to mention his leopards who Maleficent has decided to personally punish.

Cutaway

  • Maleficent: (Zaps the leopards painfully and brutally) FOOLS!!! IDIOTS!!! IMBECILES!!! (Continues blasting them)

Briefing Room

  • Mirage: But I've decided to personally punish the rest of you! I'll give you a lesson you won't soon be forgetting THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE SEASON!!! (Uses her claw spell on them, and zaps them into ashes) And as for Junjie, I have a far worse fate for you.
  • Junjie: Oh, let me guess, chores?
  • Mirage: No! MUCH worse!
  • Junjie: Wha-what could be worse than chores? Banishment?
  • Mirage: Worse!
  • Junjie: Death?
  • Mirage: Worse!
  • Junjie: EMBARRASSMENT ON YOUTUBE?!?
  • Mirage: WORSE!!!
  • Junjie: OH, FOR CHRIST'S SAKE, WHAT CAN BE WORSE THAN ALL THAT BULLSHIT?!?
  • Mirage: Blowhole? If you will!
  • Dr. Blowhole: It will be a ple-e-e-e-easure! (Pulls a lever, and all the villains put earmuffs with antennae and microphones on as a giant flat-screen TV is seen)
  • Junjie: Oh, sweet, a flat-screen TV! What's on? (Suddenly, the TV comes on and shows Dora the Explorer)...SWEET JESUS, NO!!! I DESPISE BABY SHOWS!!! LET ME OUT OF THIS CAGE, DON'T LET ME SEE THIS TERRIFYING PIECE OF--(No sound is heard in the POV of the villains, who are laughing)
  • Mirage: (The villains are able to communicate through their earmuffs) Well, you guys were right, this was a good idea of torture.
  • Cobra: (Takes a picture) Indeed, not to mention there's a DeviantArt page with this picture's name on it.
  • Etemon: (Filming the whole thing on camera) And a YouTube page with this video's name on it, baby! YEAH!
  • Fagin: (With a microphone recording the dialogue) Not to mention it will be funny to hear what this bastards has to whine once this is all finished within 2 hours. (Everyone laughs)
  • Junjie: HELP ME, DON'T LET ME HEAR THIS BULLSHIT!!! I SWEAR, THIS IS CRUEL AND UNUSUAL PUNISHMENT!!! I DEMAND TO BE LET OUT OF HERE!!! ****, ****, ****, **********, **********, ****, *******, OH GOD, *****, HOLY HELL, ******, MOTHER****, HELP ME! BY THE DEVINES, I WANNA GET OUT OF HERE!!! ********, *************************, *******, ******, **********, *******...

2 hours later... Junjie's room.

  • Junjie: (Is seen crying after the torture) God help me get the damn Map song out of my head! It's too ungodly catchy!! (Cries, and he doesn't realize that Darkly appears as a hallucination)
  • Darkly:...Uh...Junjie?
  • Junjie: (Sees her, and gasps) YOU?!? HOW DID YOU GET HERE?!?
  • Darkly: "I felt like I wanna say goodbye cause.... Well, I been having second thoughts about being a Darkness Sprite. You, kinda unintentionaly helped me see the light."
  • Junjie: "....... You mean, from loving a villain, your suddenly becoming, less dark?"
  • Darkly: "I know! Weird isn't it? You think it would be the oppisite."
  • Junjie: ".... Oh, well.... It's for the best I guess. The kind of life I presue is.... A painful one. Fortunately, the leage's rage on this eventally dies down. That happens after I been punished. Otherwise, would Mack still agree with me about Mang, even dispite the framing him mess? Besides, that thing was never one! There's not only, size issues, but it's tecnecal beastialy! Now that I think about it..... Maybe that's why not alot of people, critics espeically, were comfertable with Cynder formerly being in love with Ruber...."
  • Junjie shudders.
  • Junjie: "It's different if animals cross date, but, I think there's a serious restriction on humans wanting to date animals! Why else are bronies and furries given such harsh times by everyone else?"
  • Darkly: "..... Well, if it helps.... I'll, say I'm over you.... If I am to stop being a darkness sprite, well, I would have to avoid bad influences, right? And considering certain events.... Yeah, I could see why your friends were laughing."
  • Junjie: "Good...... At least I have the knowledge that you stopped obcessing over me! Now, go ahead and, have a life without me. I would like to, go back being in pity again... Even my own assusiates would avoid me for awhile... I mean yes, it's mainly out of fear and respect for the superiors, but it's still avoidence.... You wouldn't want to see me self-louthe."
  • Darkly: "Yeah, this looks like it's gonna get REAL depressing, so... I guess this is good-bye, Junjie.... I'll never forget you..... I mean, I am still gonna stay clear of you cause when I become good, it's not considered kosher to be friendly with a villain, but I'll always remember the good times we had.... Though I am gonna keep them to myself considering, they weren't good for everyone and-"
  • Junjie stared annoyed at Darkly.
  • Darkly: "... I'm going now."
  • Darkly vanished.
  • ???: "Father?"
  • His clone ponies appeared.
  • Junjie: "Oh, my sinister 7. Wrath, kindly take your brothers and sisters back to my private training hall... I feel, broken today."
  • Wrath, A gray pony with a fire colored mane: "Father, please.... Even if your weak-willed allies are momentarly turned against you, please know.... You have us. You will always have us. One day, you will make Mang realise that he is an unworthy fool. And once so, it'll be the High Council foolishly afraid of us."
  • Junjie: ".... I appresiate your out of character kind words, Wrath. But I mean it. I just wanna be alone for a bit. I tend to haul insults if I am bothered too much when I am, like this.
  • Wrath and the sin ponies nodded and bowed in respect, and left.
  • Junjie curled in a fetal position.
  • Junjie: "How sad it is, when a genius, is treated like garbage, for refusing to be a weakling."

Fluttershy's Cottage, Equestria

  • Darkly: (Wakes up as everything is seen in her POV. She sees herself under a tree, and surrounded by Rainbow Dogs, the Mane 6, Celestia, Luna, Cadance, Shining, Discord, and the Shell Lodgers. Then she sees her skin isn't purple anymore. Instead, it's pale yellow) What the--?!? My skin is yellow! I...WHAT DOES THE REST OF ME LOOK LIKE?!?
  • Twilight: Pfft, dramatic much?
  • Spike: Totally.
  • Darkly: (She appears as a new Light Sprite, and inside the tree she's laying under, several other Light Sprites are seen)...What's going on?
  • Light Sprite #1: We are beginning a ritual, so don't move. (Speaks in a primitive language as the Light Sprites begin to spin around the tree, and transform it into a tree similar to Twilight's Castle, and Darkly feels a light breeze in her chest)
  • Darkly: Give me a mood, anybody!
  • Light Sprite #1: SSH! (The Sprites continue changing the tree, and it is made into a large treehouse)...Finished!
  • Darkly: Okay, what's going on? Seriously!
  • Twilight: You're a Light Sprite now. We asked all the Darkness Sprites that were reformed to give this tree a little makeover and make it into your own home.
  • Darkly: Well, why put me near this...stunning cottage?
  • Fluttershy: It's my home. I thought it would be nice to keep you company while you're living here. In fact, the Light Sprite homeland isn't too far from here. There's a tiny map in your home that will lead you there.
  • Darkly: Well, that's nice. Will I meet...boys there?
  • Icky: Oh, of course! There's tons of single boys that are available for you to totally bang! (Everyone looks at him) What?
  • Darkly: ".... Do you guys act random all the time?"
  • Lord Shen: "My dear, you barely scratched the surface."
  • Pinkie: "Wait! Where's Maud Pie!?"

Meanwhile.

  • Maud was already at the Train Station.
  • Maud mildly smiles at the photos of the Rainbow Rock.
  • Maud Pie: "My life reshearch... Completed."
  • ???: "Maud!"
  • Pinkie and the others arrive!
  • Pinkie: "Why did you disappear on us?"
  • Maud Pie: "Well, I already got my proof that the Rainbow Rock exists. Plus, that Junjie mess is most likely gonna be noticed by the media, so my skeptic critics can't deny the pothograthic evidents I have."
  • Pinkie: "So, what are you gonna do now after you prooved the rock is real?"
  • Maud Pie: "I am still gonna be a rocktoligest. Rocks are pretty much what I am good at."
  • Trixie: "..... I, thought you would be a bit more happier of your proof."
  • Maud Pie: ".... I am.... I am just borned unable to express serious emotion."
  • Gilda: "I bet you were seriously annoying to Junjie when he couldn't intimidate you."
  • Maud Pie: "A rock doesn't get intimidated. Rocks are... Rocks."
  • Icky: "Well, we wish you luck. And great job on your reshearch."
  • Lord Shen: "Well everyone. It looks to be that as for this season, Junjie won't be a serious problem for a while."
  • Icky: "Yeah. And it also means that the leage is gonna stay the fuck away from us for awhile."

The University.

  • Maud Pie with a science display board: "And that was how my discovery of the Rainbow Rock went.... Certainly abit more exciting then expected."
  • The Pony students clapped!
  • Professor Blouder: "Bravo, Maud! This is an incredable breakthrough in Rocktology!"
  • Stone Cut came to Maud, ashamed of himself.
  • Stone Cut: "Maud... I'm sorry for, being skepical. I am just being a sciencetist. We... Don't normally be quick to believe in legends or supernatrol superdision. I forgot we lived in a world were creatures suppose to be myths are real for some reason. Heck, I'm kinda one of them. Put all bad tidings aside Maud?"
  • Maud Pie: Of course. (They shake) Now why don't you apologize for making fun of my sister?
  • Stone Cut: Yes, I'm sorry for that....But why is she like that when you're left with no emotion? You don't even eat her rock candy.
  • Maud Pie: Oh, trust me, I like my sister. I appreciate her candy, but I prefer REAL rocks from candy rocks. (Eats a rock)
  • Stone Cut: (Barfs on the ground, as well as the audience)
  • Professor Boulder: I'll get the janitors...ALL of them!
  • Stone Cut: HOW DO YOU GET AWAY WITH PICA WITHOUT GETTING SICK?!? MY GOD!!!
  • Maud Pie: I just do. (Stone barfs again)
  • Professor Boulder: (Holds in barf, then lets it out)...I was right on the verge for a while. But then seeing you do it made me...Uhhhgh!
  • Maud Pie: Hey, you don't love it until you try it! (Everyone begins barfing)

Epilogue

Dragon Temple

  • Icky: (Is seen mopping the floor as punishment for the gremlin incident) Oy vay. Already I got caught up in chores gawhore.... All well. At least there isn't another problem in the horison or anything like tha-
  • Spongebob screams!
  • Icky: "SPONGEBOB, I TOLD YOU NOT TO PLAY "FIVE NIGHTS AT FREDDY'S" ANYMORE! THAT GAME IS FREAKY AS SHIT!"
  • Spongebob: "IT'S NOT THAT THIS TIME?!!? IT'S KAIRI!?"
  • Icky: ".... Aw hell no!"

Kairi's room.

  • The Lougers see the place ransacked!
  • Sandy: "Shoot! It's like the end result of a bar fight in the wild west!"
  • Lord Shen: "Kairi must've been kidnapped by someone!"
  • Trixie's voice: "GUYS?! THE NEWSFLASH THAT RUDELY INTERUPTED MY SOAPS SAID KAIRI GOT KIDNAPPED BY A POLICE OFFICER TO BE SOLD OFF TO THE VILLAIN LEAGE?!"
  • Boss Wolf: "..... WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!?"
  • Icky: "..... We just NEVER seem to get a break around here, huh?"

Fin?

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