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An Iallogian war criminal has escaped from maximum security and the Lodgers and Heroes Act must find him, tracking him down to Planet Limid. There they think they found him in the form of an innocent Janiset named Divid whom they realize quite quickly isn't who they're looking for as he's just a camp counselor who runs a failing camp called Camp Failwell with a co-counselor Romoco named Gwellen and a creepy Xulture groundskeeper named Woodsmaster, having to put up with troublesome kids in the form of a pessimistic young Woodo jerk named Maux, a rambunctious nature-dependent Pollt named Vicki, a science-loving but socially awkward Mabe named Nell, a space-loving Vedger named Space Boy, a German-like Spattold artist named Delp, a magician Glowtongue named Willington, a larping Gluck nerd named Elice, a cool valley girl Ibbit named Berrett, a thespian Raccox named Playson, and a rough Barbear cub bully named Gnarc as the only thing bad about the place is that it was founded by a Kelk named Farrell Failwell, who's an international criminal guilty of frauds and laundering money from multiple worlds. They discover that the real target is Diniello, who plans to make the place more inviting in ways that're anything but. How will he be stopped?

Scenes

Camp Failwell

  • Divid: (The entrance was seen as an unsentient jumpler was briefly caught by an unsentient tondor before it choked it brutally and comically as at the entrance was a sentient janiset and woodo child)... Can you believe it, Maux? We're getting not one, not three, but TWO new campers today.
  • Maux: Yep. Truly horrifying.
  • Divid: Horrifying? Oh, there's no need to fear making a few new friends.
  • Maux: I'm not here for friends, Divid. I'm here because camp is where kids are sent when their parents don't want to deal with them. How do you think we'll return the favor when they hit 70?
  • Divid:..... Then why ARE you here?
  • Maux: Well it's definitely not because the bus only comes in from the city to pick up and drop off campers and so far that only seems like the only available way to escape this f*****g nightmare of a camp.... Definitely not that.
  • Divid:... Heeeeeey... Language.
  • Maux: Suck a di- (Was picked up)
  • Divid: Come on, is it really too much to ask that I want you kids to have as much fun as I did when I camped here?
  • Maux:... Yes, because I refuse to believe someone as happy as you can possibly exist.
  • Divid: "Well I'm equilly befiddled that someone as much as a downer as you are can exist too."
  • Maux: "..... Did you just, gave a snappy retort?"
  • Divid: You leave an impact on even the counselors. (A hoverbus came in) THERE THEY ARE!! WELCOME TO CAMP- (Shrieks as the bus cartoonishly flattened him)
  • Xulture: (Comes out driving the hoverbus to drop off a young sentient pollt and mabe) Kids'r here.
  • Pollt: (Takes a cartoonish whiff) AHHHHHHHHHHH, THAT'S THE STUFF!!!!
  • Mabe: Um... This doesn't seem like science camp.
  • Divid: (Inflates back up) You must be Vicki and Nell. My name is Divid. Your camp- (Vicki the Pollt bit his hand) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
  • Xulture: "Ohhhhh, he's gonna feel that for awhile!"
  • Nell: This IS science camp, right?
  • Vicki: No, silly, this is ADVENTURE camp. Unless mom lied again. (To Divid) Sorry about the hand, just asserting dominance, you know how it goes.
  • Divid: "(Wimpfully in pain) No problem. (Then gets a squeaky voice) To each their own."
  • Maux: "Lol."
  • Nell: Seriously, this IS science camp, right?
  • Divid: It's both, actually.
  • Nell:...... What?

Campgrounds

  • Nell:... You've gotta be crapping me! (They saw cheap camps made with outdated or cheap junk)... Is this what I even SIGNED UP FOR?!?
  • Vicki: Eh, looks like the one that I signed up for, so I'm not complaining.
  • Divid: Oh, we're trying to get a big enough budget to make the camps better thanks to our wonderful founder Mr. Failwell.
  • Nell:...... Did you even hear what you just said? What guy with the name 'Failwell' is destined to make something great? In fact, THE ENTIRE NAME OF THIS CAMP IS SELF-EXPLANATORY!! SERIOUSLY, THIS ISN'T WHAT I SIGNED UP FOR!!!! I SIGNED UP FOR SCIENCE CAMP!!! NOT SCIENCE CAMP AND MORE!!!! MY PARENTS COULD HAVE THIS PLACE SHUT DOWN FOR THIS SCAM!!!!
  • Vicki: Oh come on, Nelly, there's nothing wrong with doing more than just science. You know what they say. When life gives you citritros, you make citritade.
  • Nell: Until that citritade goes bitter, ferments and turns to waste!!!!!
  • Maux: "Yeesh, yer a real whiny bitch.... I like you."
  • Divid: Oh, we get that first complaint a lot. But believe it or not, we actually had some progress even with what little we have. Just ask the other campers.
  • Barbear Cub: AW, SWEET, A NERD TO BULLY!!! THANK YOU ARBASUS!!!
  • Spacesuit-Wearing Vedger Kid: ANOTHER FELLOW SCIENCE KID!!!! Yaaaay!!!!
  • Vicki: See, Nell? There's other science kids here.
  • Nell: Astronauts don't count, they're just the wannabe jocks of the scientific community.
  • Maux: OHHHHHH SNAP!!!
  • Teenage Ibbit: (Comes in on a hoverboard) Cool. New friends.
  • German-like Spattold Tadpole: (In a walking bowl of water with arms that painted somewhat controversial paintings) AHHH, MEIN MASTERPIECE IS COMPLETE!!
  • Nell:... Wow. So many flocked-up implications there.
  • Larping Gluck Kid: (Inside a small castle) AHH, NEWCOMERS!!! WELCOME TO THE MAGICAL REALM OF CAMP FAILWELL!
  • Illusionist Glowtongue Kid: (Did wicked illusions) TADA!
  • Raccox Thespian: AH, THEY'RE PERFECT FOR MY UPCOMING SEQUEL PLAY OF ROMERO AND JULI!!!
  • Nell: "..... This has to be a mistake. I was suppose to go to science camp! This is more like, an outmoded traditional camp that hasn't been seen since the same period when guns used to fire bullets, AND NOT THE COOL KINDS EITHER!!"
  • Maux: "Well, either your parents desided to be REAL pricks to ya, or the actual science camp ya wanted to go to was too expendsive for wallets and this place came up to them as a cheaper opition."
  • Nell: "..... (Eye Twitches)....... Does this place have a communications system?"
  • Divid: "Well, yes, but, it is abit old school. It's a model that still relies on a screen, so, no fancy holograms or anything."
  • Nell: "..... (Twitches really badly) I'll, take, what I, can get...."

Communication Room.

  • Nell: "(To his parents over an old screen communicator) PARDON MY FRINCH, BUT, WHAT, THE FUCAWITTS?! THIS IS NOT SCIENCE CAMP?! THIS ISN'T EVEN AN UP-TO-DATE CAMP?! I EVEN HAVE TO TALK TO YOU ON AN ANQUITE SCREEN-X32 MODEL THAT HASN'T SAW USE SINCE BEFORE THE ADVENT OF HOLOGRAMS?! THAT'S HOW SEVERELY OUTMODED THIS PLACE IS?!"
  • Nell's Father: "Which evidently explains the poor quility on our Holo-vision XL."
  • Nell's Mother: "Wait, Camp Failwell wasn't a science camp? That wasn't what it was said on that brochure I was given by that over-coat wearing gentlemen. Maybe you ended up on the wrong bus to an older camp of it?"
  • Nell: "I ASKED THE BUS DRIVER, AND HE INSISTED TO ME, THAT THIS WAS THE CORRECT FACILITY AND THAT HE DID NOT KNOW OF ANY BETTER VERSON OF THIS?!"
  • Nell's Father: ".... Well, maybe that brochure was, severely out of date?"
  • Nell: "THEN WHY WOULD ANYONE STILL GIVE BROCHURES FOR IT?!"
  • Nell's Mother: "..... Nell, we're very sorry about this. We promise we'll notify the police about the man giving out outdated brusures on grounds of scam-artistry. In the meantime, well, at the very least, it's still a summer camp, and your not wasting away your youth always being a tireless studier, so, why not make the most of it?"
  • Nell: "...... You're kidding me?"
  • Nell's Father: "Believe me, if that place was more dangerious then just a severely outmoded camping facility, we would've revved up the K-S-J Vessel right away and picked you up! But.... At the very least, it's still A camp, and, honestly, it might help ease your addiction to tec."
  • Nell: "CAN YOU PLEASE NOT DO THIS TO ME?!"
  • Nell's Mother: "Calm down, Nell. Remember your blood pressure. Oh, by the way, expect the Omnican Delivery Drone to deliver your medication the next day. We promise we'll get someone get to the bottom of this. Till then, try to see the brightside of the situation and make the best of it, okay sweetie?"
  • Nell: ".... Ugh..... Fine. At least when I brought over my science equitment, I can at least give this dump an upgrade."
  • Nell's Father: "Now son, you came here to be eased away from your tec addition, so as such, (Brings out a remote) I'm teleporting your gear back home."
  • Nell: "DAD NO WAIT?! (His father pressed the button and all of Nell's tec gear teleports off)....... AWWW, DAMNULAR?!"
  • Nell's Father: "Hey, easy on the Brainiacaazk languise, and try to have a good time, okay son? I'm off for my 'Sock'-Ertes seminar! (The End Transmission Sign popped up)......."
  • Nell: "(Starts twitching madly.....)"

The view of the entire planet.

  • Nell's voice: "SHITAKIMUSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMS?!" (Echoes as unsentient birds were scared out of trees)

Campgrounds

  • Nell: BY THE PREVIOUS GRANDMIND, WHY DID THIS HAPPEN TO MEEEEEE?!?
  • Romoco: UH, DIVID!! HE'S HERE!!
  • ???: (Stan Smith voice) CAMPEI DEIM!!! (A Kelk similar to Cameron Campbell appeared)
  • Divid: (Gasps enthusiastically) MR. FAILWELL!!! What're you doing here?
  • Failwell: (Chuckles) Well I'm certainly not hiding from any authorities if that's what you're thinking.
  • Divid: What?
  • Nell: EEEEEEEEYOOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!! (Points at Failwell)
  • Failwell:... Huh? I thought that loud swear was a new voice.
  • Nell: YOU HAVE SOME EXPLAINING TO DO, YOU WUCKWAD!!! (Gets out his brochure) I SIGNED UP FOR SCIENCE CAMP, NOT SCIENCE CAMP AND MORE, I DON'T WANT MORE!!!!
  • Failwell: Well that's why you read the fine print, sport. (Shows the small 'and more' part) See? Now you can't sue us.
  • Nell:... You, lowdown, ugly-horned, money-laundering, false-advertising, cash-sniffing MOTHER WUCKEEEEERRRRR!!!!!!! FIRST OFF, THAT'S WAY TOO SMALL TO READ, YOU MADE IT THAT WAY ON PURPOSE!!!! SECOND OFF, 'NOW YOU CAN'T SUE US'?! WAY TO SOUND INCONSPICUOUS WITH YOUR SCAM, CUINTSUCKER!!!!!
  • Maux: Wow, check out the balls on New Kid.
  • Vicki: (Looks at her crotch) Where?
  • Maux: "..... The NERDY new kid."
  • Vicki: "Oh, you mean how he's scolding the founder dude?"
  • Failwell: "Uh, duh, uhh, Divid, please keep these kids on a tighter leash, will ya?"
  • Divid: "(Picks up Nell) I apologiese about that, Sir. He's just alittle upset the camp wasn't what he's expecting, he'll calm down with time."
  • Failwell: "Well he better. In the meantime, I'm off to my well secured and secluded moble camper in the woods for administraction reasonings and not because I'm trying to avoid cops. Take care Divid, and uh..... Tell Gwellen we may have to restrict TV access for abit, not because of the risk cops would trace it here, because..... We wouldn't want the kids to end up happening apawn her XTV stuff, would we?"
  • Divid: "Oh most diffently not, sir."
  • Maux: "(Quietly) Annnnnd there goes any legit entertainment in this place for miles now."
  • Failwell: "So good luck, have fun, and uh..... If any well-dressed athority types were here to ask questions, deny everything! (Zooms off!) I'm also deactivating the old Screen Communicator for, wire inspection."
  • Divid: "Okay Mr. Failwell! (Failwell had already ran off)."
  • Maux: ".... So, how are you gonna break the news to Gwell?"
  • Divid: "(Now got nervious)..... Well, I'll, rip the bandage off, as gently as I can. I'm sure she'll understand.... Ish."
  • Maux: Doubt it. She's addicted to that s*** just as much as new nerd kid is to modern technology. She'll definitely take it like a monster. Sooo, good luck.
  • Divid:...... (Gulps and left)
  • Maux:...... Nell, you want out? I can hotwire that bus so we can get the f*** out of here.
  • Nell:... Where'd a kid like you learn such language?
  • Maux: Where'd a kid like YOU learn such alien vulgarity? And that of UIS' jelly bosses for that matter?
  • Nell:... Touché. Let's get out of here. But, what about the Counslers?
  • Maux: "Oh trust me, Gwell will give goody-two-shoe Divid QUITE an earfull for what that crap boss of theirs just ordered. That bitch, REALLY loves her adult enterainment."
  • Vicki: Eh, I don't see what's so wrong about this place. I'm open to anything here.
  • Nell: Easy for you to say. You're a sentient-unsentient hybrid literally reliant on nature.
  • Maux: Wait, seriously? One of her parents f****d an unsentient version of her species?
  • Vicki: "Is that a problem, anti-animentient pricks?"
  • Nell: "Tecnecally, one of your parents have to be a "Being" for you to be an Animentient. You're more like, a grey-area result of a sentient animal mating an unsentient counterpart. It's strangely wrong and unworng at the same time because, it's still within the spieces yet it's still tecnecally beastiality because the creature in question is an un-sentient creature and-"
  • Vicki: "Well it's still prickish of you to complain about that!"
  • Maux: Not my fault such a thing is just disturbing, you going to help us or not?
  • Vicki: Yes, but not to go with you. I'd love to drive a bus, but I might as well do you guys a favor. After all, I consider myself an agent of chaos.
  • Nell: "How are you an agent of an abstract concept to discripe things going into disorray and unorderly mishaps?"
  • Vicki:... The heck kinda genius are you?
  • Maux: "He's just over-thinking it."
  • Nell: "I'm just saying that it's physically impossable to represent an abstract concept."
  • Maux: Yeah, overthinking. Learn hyperbole, will you?
  • Vicki: Whatever. I'll distract the counselors so they won't notice you escaping from the camp from the cabin.
  • Maux: You sure they'll just as much be distracted when Gwellen ends up going-
  • Gwellen: ************************************ ******************* ****** ******************* ****** ************************************ WITH A SIDE OF ******************* *************** ****************** ************************** ************ RIGHT IN THE *************** ****************** ******* ***************************!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Vicki:... Wow. XTV must've given her the craziest vulgar vocabulary I've ever heard. But yeah. There's so many opportunities for them to notice. There ARE massive observational windows there after all- (Gwellen's screaming caused those same windows to shatter)... And that just made it easier.
  • The two snuck off while the going is good and Vicki went to the counselors.
  • Vicki: Wow, Gwellen. You have such a crazy temper and vocabulary.
  • Gwellen: Oh... You heard that, huh?
  • Vicki: You literally shattered your windows. Everyone could hear it.
  • Divid: Oh I am so stressed!!
  • Vicki: Oh... How about a song? That seems to relieve stress from an unbelievably happy guy like you.
  • Gwellen: "Well the only thing that can relieve MY stress is if I give that swindling asshole a piece of my mind?!"
  • Divid: Gwellen, please, violence never solves anything.
  • Gwellen: The many fights against the Villains Act beg to differ.
  • Divid: "Well, the fact that we ended up having to deal with 14 years of their bad behavior doesn't suggest that it worked."
  • Gwellen: "Ugh, are you sure you're not from Souvis? Cause ya sure talk like it!"
  • Divid: Nevertheless. A song is the best medicine.
  • Gwellen: I think it's laughter that's the best medicine.
  • Divid: OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH...
  • Gwellen: Oh Arbasus Kraan no! (Divid sung this)
Camp Camp Theme Song Song Rooster Teeth

Camp Camp Theme Song Song Rooster Teeth

  • Divid:... Ahhh, MUCH BETTER!
  • Gwellen: "....... (Quietly) Why did I ever signed on board to this?"
  • Divid: Because your job hunt was a nightmare?
  • Gwellen: That was rhetorical!
  • Maux: (He and Nell were headed for the bus) I could've thought of that.
  • Nell:... Yeah, you COULD'VE.
  • Maux: Once we get on this bus, we'll be free of this wretched camp. (They jumped on and hotwired it, driving off as Woodsmaster saw it with a crazy squawk) YEEEES!!!! FREEEEEDOM!!!! GOODBYE CAMP FAILWELL, AND GOODBYE DIVID!! NOTHING CAN STOP US NOW!!! (They crashed into a tree and caused a traffic jam)...
  • Nell:... Except for the just-realized hindsight that neither of us know how to drive.
  • Maux:... F****************************!!!!! (Sighs), But at least, we're out of the camp.
  • Nell: "Only by a diamater, of 13 feet. (The Camp was seen a fair distence away)....."
  • Maux: "...... Why did the universe desided to be a COCK to me?"
  • Nell: "Tecnecally speaking, the universe is unsentient and is made up of countless quantom engeries, so it is not able to-"
  • Maux: "KRAAN, DUDE, CAN YOU NOT TAKE FIGURE OF SPEECHES LITTERALLY AND BE OVER ANALITICAL ABOUT IT?! WAS YOUR FATHER A SCIENTOLOGIST OR PHILOSOPHER?!"
  • Nell: Technically both.... (Maux face-palms)...

Later...

  • Gwellen: (As she and Divid dealt with authorities)... You have to admit, you guys didn't expect to make it this far.
  • Divid: "(As the athorities left) Tsk, tsk, tsk. I may expect these kinda hijinks with Maux, but I'm surprised at you Nell. You two ended up getting the athoritives involved. You two know how the founder is shy about athority figures."
  • Gwellen: "(Quietly) Likely because he could be a scammer."
  • Divid: Regardless, I hoped we learned a valuable lesson here.
  • Maux: Oh no. I hope YOU learned a lesson, Divid. Before today, you had only one little bastard to deal with. Now you got three, counting Vikki.
  • Divid: What? What did she-....... Ohhhhhhhhhh, crud! She was distracting us!
  • Gwellen: You're JUST realizing that?
  • Maux: Welcome to hell, Divid. Come on, Nell. I'll take you to your tent. (They left)
  • Gwellen:... This is going to be bigger than hell.
  • Divid: Oh, look on the bright side. He made not one, not three, but two new friends today. (Pulls out his guitar only for Gwellen to grab it and beat him with it as he screams comically)

Camp Failwell

  • Vikki: So how'd it go? You just realized you couldn't drive?
  • Maux:... Thanks for the heads-up.
  • Vikki: You're smart. Surely you had to figure it out for yourselves.
  • Maux: (Sighs)
  • Vikki: Still, I forgive you for what you said. It's a natural reaction. Put her there, friends. (They shook)
  • Nell: So, any other nearby camps we should know about?
  • Maux: Two. There's the Sweet Scouts. An all-female-
  • Vikki: WHAT?! AW DAMMIT, THOSE GIRLS ARE NEARBY?!? I'm officially in hell... AWESOME!!!
  • Maux/Nell: Eh?
  • Vikki: Yeah, I used to be a Sweet Scout. But they ran me out for being 'a more literal animal'. Glad to know that I can get some revenge sweeter than their gross boxed desserts. It'll be AWESOME to watch them squirm!!
  • Maux:... Good for you, I guess. Then of course, there's the Steelscouts. The most 'militant' camp on the foggy side of the lake. Don't take ANY s*** from them. They're trying to forcibly recruit new members, albeit not through immoral ways. They invaded the camp just last week. And the week before, they made a bet that we'd be nice for a day in exchange for our best member. Divid was stupid enough to both agree to it... THEN BROKE IT 23 HOURS AND 59 MINUTES LATER BECAUSE WE HAPPENED TO GET THE GROSSEST CAMPER IN EXISTENCE!!! Luckily we gave them the gross kid. It was certainly the best troll for those s***holes.... For how long it lasted until they turned him into one of them. He's not even the same gross kid anymore. That camp, morthed him.
  • Nell: "Well, that's because as a millaterry camp, it is allowed to utilise millaterry practices and basicly shape kids placed there into more obedient children. It's obvious Camp Steel was meant to deal with kids with delinquintcy and/or behavioral problems, and/or because they were from millaterry families and are being groomed to be future soldiers like them."
  • Vikki: "Well, hey, at least he wasn't gross anymore."
  • Maux: "Yeah, but now he equilly looks down on us as if he was always apart of those guys."
  • Nell: "To be fair, have you seen the camp we're in? They likely only look down on the place because it's primitive as fuck."
  • Maux: "Fair enough, but good grief, they don't have to be assholes about it."
  • Barbear Cub: But hey, for a primitive budget, they get the job done legitimately.
  • Nell: You'd like to prove that, huh?
  • Barbear Cub: Well given the tattoo on your arm, your religion is too much to bully you on a regular basis. Does that count?
  • Nell:... Depends. What camp did you sign up for?
  • Barbear Cub: I didn't sign up for a camp. My mother signed me up for behavioral correction camp.
  • Nell:... BOOT CAMP?!?
  • Barbear Cub: But they didn't realize that such a thing would make me worse.
  • Vikki: Eh?
  • Barbear Cub: Assuming I've always been bad is a narrow-minded observation. It doesn't occur to people that I'm just a byproduct of the judgmental overprotective society. I mean you chew ONE tarter in the shape of a gun, and BANG, in-school suspension. Suddenly you're labeled a problem child for life. You're not like the other kids, you're bad. So then you get sent to a place where people perpetuate the same negative mentality, making you worse so that by the time you return home, you actually ARE bad, thus continuing the endless cycle of crime and punishment, until all that's left is a little cub. A little cub who believes he can only be what he's been labeled. A loser. A lost cause. A bully.
  • Nell:... By the previous Grandmind!
  • Maux: That's obviously bulls***. If he knows, he shouldn't be such a bully.
  • Barbear Cub: I never said it was a quick process. What'd you expect? I'm just a cub. Name's Gnarc, by the way.
  • Nell: Is there a rest stop between here and the point?
  • Gnarc: The point is that they made me see how much pain I've been causing by... Well...

Cutaway

  • Divid: COME HERE, LITTLE GUY!! (He tries to hug him until he tripped on a rock and accidentally slapped Gnarc in the face surprising everybody)... OH NO, GNARC, I'M SO SORRY!! Are you okay?
  • Gnarc:... Whoa. That, really hurt. Damn, I can't believe I've been subjecting people to physical violence like this. I feel kinda bad about my behavior.... I should probably go back to my tent and think about what I've done today. Sorry, everybody.
  • Divid:......
  • Gwellen: Wow... I guess... You did it, Divid.
  • Divid: Nonono, this is not okay!!!
  • Gnarc: No, I needed it. Thanks for your help, Divid. My mom would love to know the progress you made today. (Leaves)

Present

  • Nell:... That's all it took? Seriously?
  • Maux: Well nothing else worked.

Cutaway

  • Divid: I am confiscating that pocket knife! (Gnarc just paused before stabbing Divid through the hand and he was later seen crying like a wuss while his hand was bandaged by Gwellen)... (Later) I, I had no idea you felt that way. I'm sorry.
  • Gnarc: (Stabbed him in the other hand) WHATEVER, D***-TURD!! (Pushed him in the water and Divid was later seen crying and being bandaged again)

Present

  • Vikki: (He and Nell scoffed and burst in laughter) WHAT A WUSS!!!
  • Nell: (Laughs) But still. Surely there's ONE camp they can't cover. Like space camp. A camp like that needs a bigger budget and equipment than this s***! Explain that!
  • Gnarc: Why don't you ask Space Boy? I don't know squat about space. Besides, there's no joy in going to space since it's been LOOOOOOOOOONG mastered.
  • Nell: Yeah. Good point. I'll most certainly ask him. I can't wait to hear what he has to say.

Space Camp Area

  • Vedger (Space Boy): (Tinkering with a cheap box spaceship)... One day, I WILL go to space! I don't care if it's long mastered.... I just want to see it for myself.... On my own terms.
  • Vikki: Sooo, you just want to go to space... JUST to go to space?
  • Space Boy: Of course not! What am I, stupid?
  • Maux: Yes. And expendable.
  • Space Boy: Well have you even seen what stuff my great great great great grandfather saw in the uncharted ocean of space? (Shows them views of vacuum-inhabiting lifeforms including astro-whales, asteroids nesting space bees harvesting space dust, protoplanetary disks, space storms, inhabitable spatial sectors, wormholes, space jellyfish, giant space cells, quantum clouds inhabited by interdimensional wildlife, energy belts, massive space cities, self-operating robot facilities, astrominers, space ring racing and surfing, comets, his grandfather taking a selfie while he and his crew ran from Spaceans, energy beings, space predators, and riding space bikes)
  • Maux: Arbasus!
  • Nell: Glock's balls!
  • Vikki: WHOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!
  • Space Boy: "Yeah you guys are impressed!"
  • Vikki: I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THERE WAS LIFE IN SPACE!!!!
  • Nell: Yeah, they're called astrofauna. They often have built-in hyperdrive electroorgans, have metabolisms so small they can go for countless years without food for lightyears of travel, have unlimited flexibility, blah blah blah. There's astrrogs, starsquids, shiprays, quarkflies, spacesharks, cellumorphs, warpwings, octropoids, gravaloons, solapods, vaccumorphs, nebulafish, space reefs, aerocephalopods, aeropoids, wispfish, vortexmouths, tachyon battuses, crater serpents, shipsuckers, solaplants, space planimals-
  • Maux: In short, space has life too. Ya could've just ended with that.
  • Nell: "Yes, but it would've not have so many details."
  • Space Boy: Well I'm smart enough to know all of them. I'm not just going to space because I want to. But I want to be like him. He was the greatest space adventurer. He made friends with some Spaceans from the Theta Exosius Sector, heck, he even almost made a female Gate Sintari my great great grandma. Great great grandpa was, a reknown casanova. He rode an astrrog, he tamed the wildest of space lightfish, and tamed and rode a rogue sunwing! He even met a Starwing of Phend legend! He slain the crap out of a Starsquid and fed it to an astrrog, he even obtained a pet meteoroid. And those things were PRETTY nasty. And that's not even scratching the surface. He basically lived in space.
  • Nell: If that's the case, he wouldn't be able to live on a planet anymore. Weightlessness is monstrous. G-forces can shake your body like a soda can and make you burst the same, SAS can mess with your head and ear canals, muscle atrophy and spaceflight osteopenia can anorexiate the glock out of you so you won't live in gravity anymore, you puff up like a balloon, and don't even get me started on the mortality rate of the limited supply of oxygen. Hypoxia is the slowest way to die in space.
  • Space Boy: Yeah. That would be a problem if not for the miracle of artificial gravity.
  • Nell: "..... Fair point. I'm just pointing out that life in space has risks. Hence why becoming a space vagabond is considerably both a sad but risky venture. Without AG, you would end up forgetting about living in a planet, cause it would be a death sentence.
  • Space Boy: True, but even though he wasn't able to avoid becoming entirely dependent on space, he had descendants beforehand. They were spared the same fate. But one day, I'll not only be just as good, but be much better and finish where he left off. My dad kept his ship as a family heirloom, and once I'm ready, I'll get her purring again. It's an agile fighter that carries an entire crew and is piloted by the mind, like the ship was his own body. The carrier capsules are makeshift fighters and escape pods with virtual and accommodate each crew member. Twin cannons of programmable mods, adjustable wings and thrusters, hardcore hyperdrive, solar and electric power, and my favorite, a light coat that serves as a cloaking device and holographic disguise that turns the ship into a solawing. Hardcore!
  • Maux: And what makes your delusional ass think that this place is capable of sending you to space?
  • Space Boy: "Because, I discovered that Limid was once the sight of Gate Sintari rituals."
  • Nell: ".... Alot of those rumors are just conpiracy thoeries. There hasn't been consistent evidence to prove that the Gate Sintari have ever been here."
  • Space Boy: Oh I thought so too...... Until Elice accidentally uncovered the first proof.
  • Nell:... (He and Maux laughed like this)
SMG4 Luigi's Lesson

SMG4 Luigi's Lesson

7:20-7:26

Fantasy Camp

  • Maux: Oh s*** in space, she actually did! (They saw a Gate Sintari artifact)
  • Nell: "..... This is...... THIS IS REMARKABLE?! The Gate Sintari are amongst the most mysterious races ever! We don't even have an accreate estimate of their tec level since it's beyond even Teadr 1! This is the most magnifisent exsample of evidence that the Gate Sintari did expanded beyond their home system at some point in time! Why hasn't this been covered!?"
  • Maux: "Likely because Failwell fears the publisity of this thing will risk attention onto him. And let's be honest, Divid may be too nice and Gwell too apathic to realise, but I think Founder Failwell is some kind of netourious scammer and the po-po are likely breathing on his neck because likely he did some really dipshity things.... All things I was already pretty sure of!"
  • Gluck: HALT! Do not come any closer! The Capsual of Sintar is under the stewardship of I, Elice the Adorable!
  • Maux: More like Elice the Annoying! Seriously, Elice, cut the s***. How long have you had that? And how has nobody noticed it?
  • Nell: "That because it has the misfortune of being in a "Fantasy Camp", ergo, it runs the risk of being considered a fictuious object made in reference to the afforemetion claim of Gate Sintari enfluence in Limid."
  • Maux: Seriously, Elice, do you know the penalty for possessing an artifact as potentially dangerous as this? It's obvious that if Failwell was questioned about it, he'd make you take the blame.
  • Elice: I have a VirtNet node, you know. (She displays magical powers that were actually virtual illusions) The new kid isn't too far off that the artifact is dubbed fake because of it being in Fantasy Camp. You should be thanking me for keeping this artifact from falling into the forces of evil.
  • Maux: "But what about bad guys too SMART to fall into that logic conclusion, like, a rogue Gate Sintari, or a very strong and crazed believer of the belief about them ever coming here?"
  • Elice: "Again, VirtNet. You needth not dread for my safety."
  • Maux: "But what about if this bad guy has better VirtNet then you, or worse, he has a pedophilic lackey to deal with you personally?"
  • Elice: How long do you think I've been doing this? My dad does this as a hobby too. I don't have +155 intelligence and +215 strategy for nothing. Being into larping makes you pretty proficient in outsmarting anyone. I have played Failwell for a fool before. I have even read up all info and risks of keeping this thing. Trust me. You can always rely on Elice the Adorable to protect such a dangerous artifact.
  • ???: Please, there's ALWAYS people out there smarter than an average larper. (The illusionist glowtongue appeared) I should know. I have played people smarter than Failwell for fools. Comes with the art of illusion.
  • Maux: As much as I hate to say it, Wilington has a point. It's a big UUniverses out there. You never know if you'll find more masterful minds out there. Like, for exsample, say if you were to go up against a Brain.
  • Nell: "The correct term is "Brainiacaazk"."
  • Maux: "And alchourse, the guy who uses their cuss languise would know that. Anyway, even a dumb brain would at least have above average intelligence and would be smart enough to rekitnese your shitck. Nevermind a brain with proper intelligence. And you can forget about trying to mess with someone of the level of UIS' Head Jelly-Daddy himself."
  • Elice: "Well, then lucky for me, UIS is rarely ever interested in Limid."
  • Maux: "That doesn't mean they would be completely skeptical of possable Gate Sintari enfluence if they're given an impression about this thing being here, even if in a Fantasy Camp. Another possable canadate for trouble is a human. I mean, sure, they are a complete far-cry compaired to UIS' Jelly Bosses, but what they lack in being brainiacs like them, they have hell of alot of determination, and in some cases, the proven real genectic mutation thing they have going on. A particularly determined human with that kind of combination, and if they're a bad one, would make short work of you and claim that thing. Humans just do NOT know how to quit. That's why there's so great. Their ambition and tenacity is legendary!"
  • Elice: "Well luckly humans are also among the most morally cautious races. They aim to keep their less graceful exsamples in check."
  • Maux: "Not to say that would always work. Another concern is that, if a particularly smart terrorist manages to know the truth about this thing. And let's say that this terrorist is either a radicalised Phend, or your typical Iallogian extremeist. They would not believe in going easy on you just because your a kid, espeically not an Iallogian extremest. They're so damn determin to end their terrorist factory of a home planet's endless war that they lost their moral compus in tragicly horrorfying ways and are basicly PERFECT models of nilisum!"
  • Nell: "I-"
  • Maux: "It's a term, Nell, don't over-analise it!"
  • Elice: "Well luckly, our planet is neightbers with Keuca, a planet with a republican-like side that's netourious out to knock down a terrorist even within the system. Any radical Phend or an Iallogian of extremest intent would be hunted down feruiously."
  • Maux: "Like with the humans, that may not always be perfect. And like I said, imagine an incredably smart Iallogian managed to figure out a way to bypass that kind of security, and is pretending to be someone harmless so they can be closer to Limid, like, a camp counsler?"
  • Elice: "Limid has the most strict and thorough background checks in any of the Universes."
  • Willington: Oh, stop with the excuses, Elice.
  • Elice: It's not excuses. It's simply the truth.
  • Willington: But how far can you actually defend this dangerous decision. You could be in SERIOUS trouble.
  • Vikki: Oh, she's doing a good job. This thing at least gives Space Boy his only chance to go to space. Do you really want to take that from him?
  • Maux: Vikki, not everyone gives a s*** about pipe dreams. You know what they say. The need to the many outweigh the needs of the few. That's what I have always been saying. This camp is a product of dating, and nobody will care about it because it scammed us into coming here. It's just all about money. Everything done in this camp, budget or not, success rate or not, is just done for the money. Nothing more. This camp only still stands because if it wasn't a camp for everyone, it'd just be an outdated camp nobody wants anything to do with. I say you guys do the right thing and relinquish this dangerous artifact to the nearest authorities.
  • Vikki: AND DENY A CAMPER HIS CHANCE TO HONOR HIS FAMILY NAME?! Do you have no heart?
  • Maux: No one gives a s***! NOBODY wants to be here. Do you even know that the camp values it's stupid traditional camp roots? One time, Divid decided to have this 'Order of the Natural' gig with this anonymous reward of, of all the stupidest things, A BONFIRE AND A STAFF TO REPEAT THE SAME TRADITION!!! It's insulting that he thought anyone would care about this camp from some outdated and honestly kind of racist tradition. Nell, you can agree, that a camp like this seems to have a short lifespan anyway.
  • Nell:......... As much as I hate to say it... Everything you just said is absolutely intolerable to hear. I may be pilved that I was scammed... But I am WAY more pilved that you would suggest ruining dreams like that! Though what you say may be true, it's obvious that the camp's trying. Trying to be all the camps it's been falsifying itself as. Have you considered that Divid only keeps trying... Because nobody else is? I mean, SOMEBODY has to.
  • Maux:......
  • Vikki: You know, he has a point. It may be a scam, but you can't deny, it's doing it's job well. To suggest that you'd sacrifice such astonishing dreams? It makes me sick. You seem too dangerous to even be here. I bet even your parents dumped you here because you're such an asshole. (Maux was shocked by those words) What, I ask you, makes you think hurting people like that is no big deal regardless of how legally questionable it is? What makes us think any others out there won't be next? What happened to you to make you such a sociopath?
  • Maux:... (Wipes away tears) You want to know? (Hands them his enrollment papers) Read it and literally weep! (They find he has no camp activity)......
  • Nell:... You, have no camp activity?
  • Maux: Vikki was right. My parents dumped me here because they didn't care. They were criminals from Bengren. They called kids like me 'a recipe for disaster in the criminal world'. Your kid screws up one criminal mastery and you get tossed into the slammer. They neglected me and dumped me here because they said I was 'too dangerous'. They didn't want me accidentally getting them in jail. So they abandoned me. (Everyone was legitimately shocked)...... So yeah, thanks for reminding me I was never wanted.... Thanks a lot. (He sat in a corner and sulked in sadness)...
  • Vikki:...... Well now I just feel like a sociopath myself.
  • Nell: "Yeah, I too do felt we were too quick to turn on him for only making logical sense about the risk factor this artifact holds."
  • ???: I'm surprised you guys didn't put that together already. (The Spattold came in through his autonomous bowl)
  • Nell: Oh, you're the very disturbing artist that painted controversial sblet?
  • Vikki: Arbasus, how many cusswords do those brains have?
  • Nell: MILLIONS. When you have high intelligence, your language expands.
  • Spattold: My name is Delp. I aspire to be da best symbolic artist ever. I've always vanted to since mein father took me on a universal trip, and I learned so much about history. Art is ze pinnacle of symbolism. (He used robotic arms to paint up a disturbing painting) See?
  • Vikki:... Wow! So much wrong with that.
  • Delp: Zis actually represents what Maux is going through.
  • Nell: Chyeah, too well. What's with the imagery of the controversial concepts of anarchy made from the Great Stagnation?
  • Delp: It symbolizes hardship. Crime is no foster life for a poor kid. Being ze son of criminals is just as saddening as ze Anarchic Effect of ze Great Stagnation zat created lawless worlds like Bengren. And zen there's this.
  • Nell: You mean the most controversial part of the Anarchic Effect involving the historic anarchist Dellinger O'Itler?
  • Delp: Indeed. Maux is just like him in childhood. He was neglected by an anarchist world, just like Dellinger. It's symbolic zat if we aren't careful, Maux could share the same fate.
  • Nell:... Question, why is your artistry so... Controversial?
  • Delp: Ze answer is more mature zan you think. I grew up on mein father's long crusade around ze UUniverses. I have admired history and it's arts. Vhat most say is questionable, I see as symbolic. I see ze world as morally grey, and I see mein art as a way to avoid repeats of those terrible times.... War and evil has always been terrifying. Zat's why I do this. Because art, is mein method of teaching.
  • Vikki: ".... So, your saying that art SHOULD be controverseal?"
  • Delp: "That oversimplifives it. Controversey is by no means a nessessity.... But it does give a more powerful message if it is needed. Yes, it will have it's critics, it's naysayers, it's over-protactive hyper-sensitive parents or very touchy relijustus figures, but then again, doesn't anything controverseal have it's critics? Is it not the point of Controversey to invite conflicting viewpoints?"
  • Nell: "Well it depends on the level of controversey. Sometimes a controverseal piece would get censored or banned in some places if it's bad enough."
  • Delp: Zhat's the beauty of it. Controversy leaves a lasting impact. I don't mind it if mein art has to be censored. The goal, is to teach through mein art. Look at zis painting, ignore the controversial overtones, and tell me zat it pictures Maux's situation perfectly.
  • Nell: ".... Well, admitingly, yes, in an overtly graphic sort'of way, it does deliver the message of Maux's psyche."
  • Vikki: Yeah, we'd better apologize.
  • Nell: "I think so too."
  • Maux: (They approach him) Go, the f***, away, d***tips.
  • Vikki: Maux... We want to say sorry. We didn't know you were neglected.
  • Maux: You think sorry is going to make a paradox where you didn't remind me of my misery?
  • Nell: Why the flumkamumk would we think that?
  • Maux: Geez, do you always have to give smartass retorts?
  • Nell: Hey, I can't help it. It's like an impulse to geniuses.
  • Vikki: Come on, Maux, we can sympathize. What sick f*** wouldn't feel sorry for you?
  • Maux: "Law absolutists, people my parents ruined, amoral machines not buildt like Omnicans, unsentient animals, gods that like empathy-"
  • Vikki: "Hey don't pull a Nell on me, that was retorical!"
  • Nell: "Can we please not turn my name into a joking phrase?"
  • Maux: Too late.
  • Nell: Okay, that right there! THAT is why you're in this mess. Your abandonment made you worse. You don't want to end up like Gnarc or Dellinger, do you?
  • Maux: Who cares? It doesn't matter. Life sucks, and we live in a world of desensitized apathetic assholes. Why do you think I'm the worst camper here? Being from a criminal world leaves a sour impression on a child. It's like a gambling addiction. I make my own living. I practically run this f*****g camp.
  • Nell: Well I'm sorry, but that's no excuse to be such a jerk.
  • Vikki: Nell, we're trying to apologize, remember?
  • Nell: Obviously he is too stubborn for sorry. He can't expect us to feel sorry for him if he treats everyone like dirt with his pessimistic bullglomp!
  • Vikki: Did you make that cussword up?
  • Nell: Seriously, what did this guy do on Bengren to make his parents dump him?
  • ???: HARK! I hear the sound of a requested flashback! (The thespian Raccox appeared)
  • Raccox: Playson Grandplay at your service.
  • Maux: Nice costume, dork. Why don't you take Delp's advice some time?
  • Playson: EXCUSE YOU!!! This is the garment of the Hegedus Family who founded my home sector!
  • Maux: "So, you based your fastion sense on famous dead people?"
  • Playson:... You uncultured vrat.
  • Maux: "HEY, BLAME MY S****Y PARENTS FOR THIS WONDERIOUS PERSONALLY!?"
  • Playson: Ah, yes, speaking of which...

Later...

  • Playson: (In the amphitheater with a virtual device)... Bengren hasn't been the same lawful world since the accursed devil from space.
  • Maux: IT'S CALLED AN ASTEROID!!! NONE OF US SPEAK APOTHASPEARE!!!!
  • Playson: THEN LEARN!!!! I'm trying to defend you and I don't want to hear you bitching! Anyway, the devil from space ruined the planet and murdered law! Such a trauma ruined mentality. Life recovered, but life wasn't the same.
  • Nell: IT'S CALLED EVOLUTION!!
  • Vikki: (Slaps him) Shut up, you!
  • Playson: Thus, Bengren came into a path of criminal hood, one that resulted in getting a hole the size of moon craters, thanks to trying the paience of the birds of Keuca that resulted in a rogue mechanical monster-
  • Maux/Nell: "ASTRO-LASER!? (Vikki smacks both) OW?!"
  • Playson: To scar them more! Thus, crime became fact of the world forever-more. So nobody knew the right way to live. Everyone only cared about themselves or others worth their trouble the business of criminals. A tragic fate for a son. (He virtually turned into Maux)... These merged universes suck.
  • Maux: Now you're just mocking me.
  • Playson: Do you want me to defend you or not?
  • Maux: I never said I needed your help. Your plays suck.
  • Vikki: Seriously, Maux, that's the problem. You're ungrateful. Let him finish!
  • Playson: Am I really such a liability?
  • Hologram Silhouette: Sorry, son. We can't have you around. Being a parent is dangerous in the criminal world.
  • Playson: Then just turn a new leaf! Is that so hard?
  • Hologram Silhouette #2: Criminals can't reform so easily. Espeically not on Bengren. Your kid could do something dangerous, get themselves in trouble, and given how dangerous you are, one act of disobedience can get your parents in jail, and that's assuming if it's the Law-Forcers that you got us un trouble with. You can't stay with us.
  • Playson: So, you're just disowning YOUR OWN SON?!
  • Hologram Silhouette #1: No. We're just sending you somewhere you can be safe.
  • Playson: But, we're a family. Family members don't get left behind or forgotten.
  • Hologram Silhouette #2: Wake up, son, that kinda thing only works for worlds with laws. Kids don't belong on Bengren. Sacrifices have to be made, and no childish, law-sucker words like that are going to change anything.
  • Hologram Silhouette #1: But it won't be forever. We will return.
  • Playson:... You promise?
  • Hologram Silhouette #1: Promises are teaching people to be betrayed. Either we'll be back, or not. And keep in mind, being a criminal is an occupational hazord. We could either be arrested, or worse. Either way, ya may want to practice self-relience as soon as possable. It could REALLY be helpful if we never come back.
  • Playson:... (The setting of the amphitheater changed to the camp)... It's official.... My parents don't care about me. (The simulation stopped as Playson bowed) Scene.
  • Vikki: (Was sobbing) THAT IS SO TRAGIC!!!
  • Maux:.... It was much crueler and raunchier than that, but it was accurate nonetheless.
  • Playson: "Well sometimes plays or even moving pictures have to take some liberties to soften a real event for the audiences to best absorb. Espeically when children are in mind."
  • Nell: Well yeah. While what your parents said kind of made sense, their mistake was deciding to run away from you instead of standing up for you. They were cowards. They probably deserve to be arrested, assuming it happened to them.
  • Vikki: Well no more. You've got us, Maux.
  • Maux: ".... (Calms down)..... Well, ya know, if I was a kind of ass that didn't wanted to be with you guys, I kinda don't have a choice. But, even if I had the opition, it'll always be with you chuckle-heads. Much as Div is abit of an annoying happy-saphead and Gwell is as raunchy as her shows and Failwell CLEARLY being a conman, I'll admit, it's at least never a boring day here. Not saying I'm crazy for camps, but, it's eventful, at the least. (Vikki grabbed both Nell and Maux closer to her for a group hug) DOI'OH?!"
  • Vikki: "GROUP HUG?!"
  • Nell: "(Gaspy breaths), The Omnican Probe delivering my medications would be much appresiated now! I need my inhaler! (Brings it out and uses it!)"
  • Maux: "(Strained) Easy with the personal space, why don't ya viks? (The other Campers joined in) Wait, wait, what're you, don't- CRAAAAAP?! (They all hugged him)"
  • Nell: (Noticed the cool Ibbit)... Oh, you're the only one we didn't get introduced to. Who are you?
  • Ibbit: Berrett. The coolest camper here, and future daredevil. Seeker of being cool and achieving the impossible. I already got the hoverboard to do it.
  • Nell: "Well what's a girl like you doing here? You look too cool for this place."
  • Berrett: "Unfortunately, my parents missed the memo on that and basicly did what your parents likely did, send me here cause of broshures. But hey, they're both in Grand Council Security Services, or the GCSS, they can keep up. They're mah cool gay dads."
  • Vikki:... I like her.
  • Nell: "You're from a homosexual household?..... Hey, I'm not one to judge. Live and let live my father was known to say."
  • Berrett: "Hey thanks for being chill about that. Usually, some people are either not so cool with it, or they just get nosy and be up in my biz about it, like, how do I exist if my dads are gay, or do I have problems with people that're uncool with gay people, do you have issues with relijustus folks, ya know, the same song and dance, ya know?"

(Later...)

  • Divid: Everyone, this is going to be a great day. The renowned Shell Lodgers are coming.
  • Playson: Those guys that saved us all from the Villains Act?
  • Divid: You bet'cha. Though they stated that their reasons are need-to-know. But, we can show off the adequate if not successful progress of this camp.
  • Vikki: Oh, I heard of them. They're weirdoes.
  • Maux: Eh, they'll care less and just be out of here eventually.
  • Divid: Well I won't let that stop us from giving a proper welcome and accommodation.
  • ???: I'm back! (Failwell came back)
  • Divid: MISTER FAILWELL!!! BACK SO SOON?!
  • Failwell: Back? Why, I've been here the whole time, Div.
  • Gwellen: But you went to a hidden bunker-
  • Failwell: (Sternly) THE WHOLE TIME!!
  • Divid: Well that's perfect, because you're just in time for the Lodgers' visit.
  • Failwell: The who's visit?!
  • Divid: The Shell Lodge Squad.
  • Maux: Dumbest name ever. Are they a squad or a lodge?
  • Divid: We can help make whatever mission they-
  • Failwell: (Grabs him) BUT THEY CAN'T BE HERE!!! BECAUSE IF THEY ARE, THEY'LL FIND OUT EVERYTHING MORALLY QUESTIONABLE, GET THE WRONG IDEA, AND FIND OUT THAT THE KIDS' PARENTS DIDN'T SEND THEIR KIDS TO WHATEVER STUPID CAMP THEY THOUGHT THEY SENT THEIR KID TO!!!
  • Divid:... Oh.
  • Failwell: Div, for the sake of Camp Failwell, you have got to redirect those Lodgers THIS INSTANT!!!! You'll know them by their stupid flying van with hotrod flames- (The hoverbus arrived)
  • Woodsmaster: (As the Lodgers appeared) Lodgers are here!
  • Failwell:...... F***! (Ran off and hid in the bushes while still holding Divid!) WHY DIDN'T THEY USE THEIR VAN?!
  • Divid: "Weeeeeeeeeeeeellllllllllllllllllllllll, it HAS been said that the Lougers are held in our universes by order of UIS due to concerns that they could be a threat to their soverenty."
  • Failwell: "...... WHY WASN'T I TOLD THIS?!"
  • Divid: "Well, Gwell could've mentioned it if she can still actcess her XTV. Sometimes they play mock news shows that talk about current events."
Nostalgia Critic Fail Sound Effect

Nostalgia Critic Fail Sound Effect

  • Failwell: "..... (Quietly) Damn, betrayed by my own cautions?!"
  • Divid: "Well, even if it wasn't for that sir, she also kinda doesn't like you, so-"
  • Failwell: "Besides the point, idiot?! I mean it, keep the misfits entertained enough so they CAN'T discover that- Erm, well, get the wrong idea that this could be a scam due to unsolitisted rumors."
  • Divid: "Well, I'm sure they're here for business for serious then that, but okay sir."
  • Failwell: "Yeah sure whatever, just distract them- Erm, I mean, mislead them- D'oh, I mean-"
  • Divid: "Keep them busy and occupied sir?"
  • Failwell: "YES THAT?! Now do that, and I'll stay in bushes! (Boots Divid right into the misfits and kids)......."
  • Icky: "..... Uhhhh, you okay, dude?"
  • Divid: "(Gets up stupidly quick) HELLO, SHELL LOUGE SQUAD?!"
  • Fu-Xi: "Uh, quite, hello...... You."
  • Divid: "..... Oh where are my mannors? I'm Camp Counselor Divid. And this, is camp Failwell."
  • Squidward: "...... That has to be the stupidist name for a camp in the histroy of stupid camp names."
  • Failwell: "(Briefly unhides from bush) HEY, I RESENT THAT?! (Quickly hides again before the Lougers saw him)."
  • Maux: ".... I'm starting to like these misfits already."
  • Divid: "Oh, don't let the name fool you, it's better then it sounds. Shall I offer you a free tour of the place?"
  • Failwell: "(Peeks out of the bushes) EXNAY ON THE OURNSAY, HALFWIT?! (Pops back in before seen again)."
  • Divid: "Uh, that is to say, may I ask for the reason for the visit?"
  • Shifu: ".... Would it suit you if we talk about this, privately? So not to worry the children."
  • Divid: "Goodness, it must be serious if you worry about the children's well being. (Quietly) Is a Pedo-Freddrick on the loose?"
  • Shifu: "You'll understand soon enough. Your office?"
  • Divid: "It's more of a counselor cabin, but okay. (Divid leads the group in the cabin)...."
  • Maux: "Ughh, I hate it when adults pull that "Think of the Children" kind of shit."

Inside Cabin.

  • Divid covers up all windows and made sure the door was lock.
  • Divid: "So, Lougers, what's the 411, as the kids would say...."
  • Fu-Xi: "..... Okay, I'll level with you, you sudo-Mongoose. How familiar are you, with the planet Iallog?"
  • Divid: "Well, I mainly heard about it from Gwellen's very adult programs. It's a very not happy planet from my understanding. People always hurting eachother for very sad reasons, I.... I give out air hugs for them."
  • Icky: ".... Okay Peewee, we're cutting out the filler and get to the point! An Iallogian Extremest is said to be hiding in this planet and is after a legendary artifact related to a super mysterious race!"
  • Divid: "Goodness! That IS worse then a Pedo-Freddrick! That won't do for a place like Limid! How did he got pass Keuca's space patrols?"
  • Tigress: "We were informed that he was a particularly crathy anf deceptive sort. He was of the group The Hidden Eyes of Iallog, a group made infamous of doing extreme acts via espionage and getting at weakpoints of their target."
  • Divid: "Well why Limid? We have nothing to do with their grudge-match with Keuca!"
  • Mr. Krabs: "It doesn't involve that. It's because this particular member got wise to claimed rumors that beings known as the Gate Sintari used to visit this place and left relics here."
  • Divid: "..... Pfff, oh then he's being a silly-billy and wasting his time here. That's only a myth."
  • Po: ".... Buddy, we're the same people that were able to show that Lamistan's Stargate exists and discover alot of crazy stuff about life. Do you REALLY wanna be so sure about that?"
  • Divid: "Well, I just trust what my superior says, and he said that there's no relics of such nature."
  • Icky: "We'll be sure to note that when that ineditabily becomes a thing. Point is, we're here to bust his nilistic ass before he does something stupid with that relic in the name of bringing back "True Peace" to Iallog, via trying to provoke a stronger planet into attacking it."
  • Divid: "Well, do you got any leads?"
  • Fu-Xi: 'Well, for starters, the HA's shorces say it's been implied that this Iallogian, is the same speices as you. And that the crafty sudo-mongoose devil, is pretending to be a camp counselor."
  • Divid: "(Gasps drumaticly)! But that's impossable! Limid's background check system NEVER fails!"
  • Iago: Pal, villainy in this dimension has damn good agents.
  • Icky: "Also, THE GUY COULD'VE LIED HIS WAY THROUGH THAT! Background Checks can only be so relieable for so long if a lier is confident enough to masks what he said as fact. And trust me, based on what I heard, these Hidden Eye guys, ARE DAMN GOOD LIERS?! A female member even managed to seduced a saultan allied with a feuding ruler of the terratory he was apart of, into actselly being hopelessly in-love with her to the point he willingly spilled the beans about the nation's powerful armies and led to their collapse, and leaving the fat idiot heart broken to the point that he won't accept no girl other then her! They're THAT good at being liers?!"
  • Divid: "..... I GOTTA WARN LIMID'S PLANET MANAGER ABOUT THIS?!"
  • SpongeBob: We're taking care of that right now.
  • Shifu: Indeed. I don't think it's smart for some random camp counselor to barge in and make wild claims. They'll believe us more than they will you.
  • Divid: "... Fair point, but, it would do well to have the other camps warned that a very bad and troubled soul is at risk of hurting others because of his or her own troubles! It would destroy me if children got into the crossfires of these extremeist."
  • Shifu: "But it would also not do well to cause a panic, and/or, alarming this same extremeist. I trust you understand how dangerious such an extremest from Iallog can be when cornered."

Transcript

Coming soon...

Material

Songs/Music/Videos

Camp Camp - Better Than You (Lyrics Video)

Camp Camp - Better Than You (Lyrics Video)

Divid vs. Diniello

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